I Never Planned On Being A Military Spouse
This wasn’t something I dreamed about or planned for. Even after I had met my husband.
I got married in 2002 to a man who had already served in the military a little over 2 years. He was only a few years shy of completing his 8 years of service. He was considered “Inactive Ready Reserve.” That basically meant he could be called up but the military wasn’t really a part of his life anymore. When 9/11 happened I did worry that he would get called up and wondered what it would be like to be a military wife but by the time we got married that didn’t seem too likely so I didn’t really think about it anymore. I didn’t see myself as a Military Spouse and did not think that was something that would ever happen.
When I married my husband and thought about the future, the military just wasn’t a part of it. I never thought that I would parent alone for so long. I never thought I would go 11 months without seeing my husband. I had been in long-distance relationships in the past and I didn’t want that in a marriage. I didn’t think that should be a part of a marriage. That was for people who were dating, right?
I never thought I would have so much alone time in marriage. I never thought I would have to worry about my husband in a war. I remember I had a coworker with a boyfriend who was a marine. They got married and then he went overseas. I remember seeing her write love letters and I just couldn’t imagine that kind of life. Military life was not something I was ever going to do. I didn’t think that just three years later, I would be the one to write those love letters to my own husband who was overseas.
I grew up between 2 marine bases and I never thought I would live on a military base or have my own military ID.
Life has not gone how I thought it would. Sometimes I wonder if all this sacrifice is worth everything we have gone through. I have met so many wonderful people I would never have if he had never joined the military. I have seen so many different places I would never have been able to see if he had never joined. I know that our time in the military was the way everything was supposed to be and remembering that can help on the harder days. I can look back and see our whole experience and know we were doing what we were meant to do.
When I married my husband I was not planning this kind of life…but this is the life that I have and all I can do is look at the positives and remember that life hardly ever turns out exactly how you planned it, no matter what you do or what type of job you have.
No, I never planned on being a military spouse but I am and I will do the best I can as I support my husband.
What about you? How is your life different than you thought it would be? Did you think you would be a military spouse?