Stationed In Germany | Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Have our own identities when our spouse is in the Military

April 11, 2012 2 Comments

Army Wife Our spouse joins the Military and our life changes. We have to make sacrifices because of it. It might be where we want to live or what we want to do for a career. It might be the amount of children we have or the way we live our lives. How do we stay true to ourselves when it feels like the Military has the final say?

When we were stationed in Germany our lives were a lot more Military centered. We had to depend on the Army post for pretty much everything. From where we got our mail, the majority of our groceries to all of our healthcare needs. Basically anything American=the Army. Since Germany was my first duty station I felt that the Army ruled almost everything about my life. They told me what I could do as far as having a home business. They told me when I got to see my husband and when I had to live without him. They told me what doctor I had to see and what school my kid had to go to.

We have been stationed in the US for two years now and I have to admit that the Army feels less controlling than it did before. I am sure that each person has their own experiences with this and has their own struggles when it comes to creating or keeping their own identities after their spouse joins the Military. I am a stay at home mom but I am also a work at home mom. I want my own business. I want my own thing to focus on. I feel as though whatever it is I chose to do, it needs to be something I can take with me wherever we get stationed. I do worry about going oversees again because of the rules they sometimes put on what you can and can’t do. I would hate to spend years building on something and have it taken away from me because of where we have to move. On the other hand the chances of us moving anywhere for a few years is very slim and the chances of us going overseas is even smaller so I try not to worry about it. I need something for me, something that I love and that I feel is something I can make my own. Right now my main focuses are on Scentsy and blogging. I love both of these things and I hope to see them grow as the months and years go by. And most likely they are things I can take with me no matter where this Military life might take us.

What about you? What are your goals for your life? Has the Military made it hard for your to achieve them?

Friday Photo Flashback: German Christmas Markets

December 16, 2011 1 Comment

If you are ever stationed in Germany you will get the chance to visit at least one German Christmas market. Most of the towns have them even if they are small. While we were over in Germany we got to visit quite a few of them. We never were able to make it to the big one in Nuremberg.

Have you ever been to a German Christmas Market?

Erbendorf

Schweinfurt

1 Comment Filed Under: Photos, Stationed in Germany, Stationed Overseas Tagged With: christmas, christmas market, friday photo flashback, german christmas market, germany

I can’t get over it

December 13, 2011 3 Comments

I can’t get over it. I can’t believe he is turning FIVE tomorrow. My little Germany baby is going to be five. Where did the time go? When I think of childhood I think of five as a turning point. You are now a real big kid. No more toddler stuff. He will start Kindergarten in less than eight months. He loves everything Lego Star Wars. That is pretty much all get got for his birthday. I hope the next five years don’t go by as fast but I am sure they will…

Little Newborn-His hair was the darkest out of my three. He was also my biggest baby at 8lbs.

My favorite picture-Ben home on R&R to meet his little boy.

One year old-Right after Daddy’s 1st deployment.

Two years old- Right after Daddy had to deploy for the 2nd time.

Three years old-When we first moved back to the US. He still talks about our orange Germany house.

Four years old- At the zoo

Pretty much five-Taken last week. He is of course wearing a Star Wars shirt.

3 Comments Filed Under: Army Life, Baby, Life With Little Boys, Military Life, Photos, Stationed in Germany Tagged With: Five years old, happy birthday, little boys, turning five

A Letter to My Pre-Army Wife Self

December 5, 2011 4 Comments

Dear Julie,

You don’t know it yet but in a few months your husband is going to be joining the Army. Don’t worry, it will be your choice too. Your life is about to change forever. Everything you pictured for your life is going to be different. But don’t worry, it will be good I promise.

You guys are going to be able to live in Germany but I have to warn you it will take a while to get over there. Good old “Hurry Up and Wait” that is best to learn about right away. Sometimes the Army takes forever to move paperwork. It won’t make any sense to you but it will frustrate you. The best you can do is work on what you are supposed to and pray that things move along quickly.

I also need to tell you that although you are going to Germany it isn’t going to be easy. You will miss your family a lot. You will miss America more than you ever could have imagined. You will enjoy getting to travel. Do it often as there is a lot to see. Don’t be afraid to go places and take your camera everywhere (although I probably don’t have to tell you that.)

While you are in Germany you will have to go through two deployments. The first one will be harder than the second. You will be challenged in ways you never thought you would be. You will survive. Your husband will come home. The deployment will eventually end. Depend on God and your friends to get your through.

By now you probably are wondering why your husband should even join the Military if it is going to be like this. Well I haven’t gotten to the good parts yet. You will have some great times as an Army Family.

You will get to see the world! You will get to take your kids to 11 countries. You will get to meet people from all types of cultures. You will get to meet people from all over the United States. Your parent’s will be able to come see Europe and visit you. You will get to experience having a baby in Germany.

You will get to know the pure joy of a homecoming. You will have a fantastic time together during R&R. You will get to dress up again and go to balls. You will see a side to your husband you never got to see before. You will see him mature and grow as he serves his country with honor. You will see him waking up before the sun to run miles in the rain. Your heart will grow with pride when you tell your little boys what their Daddy does.

Don’t worry Julie. You will be okay. You will make it. You will see that this life is the one God wanted for you. Remind yourself of that when times get really hard.

Love Julie, Army Wife of six years.

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

4 Comments Filed Under: Army Life, Marriage, Military Life, Stationed in Germany, Stationed Overseas Tagged With: army life, army living, Deployment, military, military living, military wife blog, military wives

What I wish I knew before he joined the Army

September 27, 2011 3 Comments

We have been an Army family for almost 6 years now. Although I am glad we did make the decision for Ben to join the military and we have had some great experiences, there are some things I wish I had known before hand. Not because I wish we would have decided not to join but so that I would have been a little more prepared for it all.

I wish I had known that you would have to wait…a lot. That getting a family over to Germany can take months and months. That it might come down to waiting on 1-2 pieces of paper. That orders can change and that deployments have ever-changing start and end dates.
I knew it would be hard to be alone with my kids for long periods of time. I didn’t realize that sometimes it would feel SO hard that I would break down and wouldn’t know exactly how I was going to make it through. And that other times I would be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
That Germany would be so emotionally difficult sometimes. That being that far away from your family and everything that you are used to can be really really hard. I am glad we were stationed there but sometimes it was very emotionally hard to be there, even when Ben was home.
That I could handle so much. That I could go through so much and still come out the other side a stronger person. If you had told me in 2005 what all I was going to go through the next six years I would have been shocked. I would have told you I could never do such a thing. Go 11 months without seeing Ben? No way I could do that! Get through 3 deployments? You are crazy! Have a baby in a German hospital without my husband? Say what?

The Army life has been shocking in so many ways. I am not sure exactly what I expected beforehand. I wasn’t raised in a military family so I really had no idea. I knew we would be apart sometimes, I didn’t really get what that was like until we went through it.

What do you wish you would have known before you became a military spouse? Do you think it would have helped you?

3 Comments Filed Under: Army Life, Deployment, Military Life, Stationed in Germany, Stationed Overseas Tagged With: About the army life, army life, army wife, life in the Army, life in the military, military life, military living, military wife, What I wish I knew About the Army Life

Germany Thoughts, 18 Months Later

August 11, 2011 1 Comment

I can’t believe we have been back in the US almost 18 months now. Just seems so crazy to me! For my new followers we were stationed in Germany for four years before we moved here to Tennessee.

Even once in a while I think about Germany. I have noticed about 95% of my friends who have left Germany still really miss it years later. But I have not really felt that way. I see the four years in Germany as a great experience that left me with a lot of great memories. Sometimes I really miss my hometown, sometimes I really miss where I went to college and where I met Ben, sometimes I really miss Lexington where we lived when Ben joined the Army. But I don’t ever really feel like I really miss Germany in the same way.

I love living in the states. I like not missing 4,000 things on a daily basis. I like that I am only 2 time zones over from my parents. I like that we could drive to see family even if it takes a couple of days. I like that I can have a lot of my life off post in the civilian world. In Germany that is pretty difficult to do. Even if you do a lot of traveling (which I would suggest) your every day doings are usually connected to the military.

Don’t get me wrong, I do think about the good memories I have had of Germany. The walks I took, the things I got to see, the people I met there. Germany was our first duty station as a military family and I think it was really a great way to dive into this lifestyle. But more than this, Germany was where I really got into this parenting thing. My oldest was just 18 months when we moved there. Germany introduced me to playdates, playgrounds, preschool, figuring out how to balance the home with children. All of that kind of stuff. Because of that Germany will always hold a special place in my heart. But please keep me in the US, at least until my children are grown. I am finding it to be much easier.

How about you? Have you PCSd back to the US from an Overseas tour? How has the transition been for you?