Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Guest Writer

Balancing Life, Love, and the Demands of a Drill Sergeant’s Schedule

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I became an Army spouse back in 2012 in the Colorado Springs/Fort Carson area. This is where the journey began for my husband, myself, our daughter, and later, our son. Everyone says I can never be with someone in the Military. They always ask, “How do you do it?” My response is, “ I just do, because I love him.” Sounds so cliche, cheesy, corny even, but I have been managing this lifestyle for 13 years now, and each challenge has brought me and my spouse that much closer. 

When we received an abrupt notice that we were getting orders to Ft. Sill Oklahoma, my heart sunk. I was so nervous because I hadn’t heard much good things about the Drill Sgt. lifestyle. They train day and night with hardly any rest in between. There are strict rules about the trainees being left alone so there must be a Drill Sgt with them at all times until lights out. 

This has been very exhausting for my husband. He likes to stay physically fit and loves our family time. We have had to get creative on how to squeeze in any time together, whether it’s a quick coffee date or simply vegging around binge-watching a show on his days off.

The other challenge has been keeping in sync with each other’s schedules; we don’t always align. For instance, he works the weekends as well, so while he gets up at 4:30 a.m., the kids and I are trying to sleep in. He also can’t text or call me much because he is surrounded by trainees all day long, or he can even be in the field for hours. Communicating can be hard, too. 

This can make any social functions or planning very difficult because, just like any job in the military, they can’t request time off so easily. We have been adjusting and trying to make the most of the time we do have together.

How do I balance it all?

I am currently treating this time as if he were deployed even though he is at work, on base,15 miles down the road. I just do the things that bring me the most joy and whatever occupies my time. I got a new job, I’m exercising, I go on adventures with my kids, and I try to visit with my friends and family.

It all comes down to what you value the most and what is important to you. I do try my best to be home whenever I know he will be back so that I can at least get some time to catch up. I wash his uniforms, make him meals, pay bills, and do anything to make things easier for him. It is a very selfless time for me. I’ve even had Uber Eats send him his favorite food to his work site. 

I am looking forward to when this time-consuming schedule fades. I know it will all be worth the sacrifice. Counting down to retirement, but that is a whole other article. Stay positive, and best of luck in your adventures.

Thank you to Stacey for her guest post about being the spouse of a drill sergeant. If you would like to write a guest post for Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life, please fill out my Guest Post Sign Up form.

Balancing Life, Love, and the Demands of a Drill Sergeant’s Schedule

Super Smart Tips For Building Up Your Savings During the Holiday Shopping Season

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Interested in guest writing on Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life? Visit my Duty Station Guest Posts post for more information.

The holiday shopping rush is upon us. If you’re worried this means you’ll need to risk going into debt, think again. Going all out on everyone’s Christmas gifts doesn’t mean you have to go into the red, instead, you can save your money by using the following tips.

Build a List & Do Your Homework

Santa checks his list twice, and you need to do the same. One of the best ways to make sure you don’t overdo it during the holidays is by writing down everything you have to purchase or everyone you will be giving a gift. That way, you can refer back to it and check things off as you buy them.

Once you have a list together, then it’s time to start your research. One item can be sold by a variety of companies for a different price. It’s easy to get overwhelmed by trying to play the find the absolute best price game. But there are a lot of sites out there that simplify your search. Also, sales are constantly popping up during this time of year, so sign up for e-blasts from your favorite stores and follow them on social media to get notified.

Consider D.I.Y. or Second Hand Gifts 

Sometimes, it’s a personal touch that gets the biggest response. So rather than going big with a fancy store-bought gift, make your own present. Whether it’s baked goods or a DIY project, these options will save you some money. While you do pay some money to buy the components for the gift, you can save the money that you would have spent on higher-priced items.

If you’re not the craftiest person, visit second-hand stores to purchase some unique finds. Thrift stores are full of a wide variety of items at low prices, so even finding something for the pickiest person on your list is possible. Buying used items at markdown discounts will save you a lot of change. Clearance racks, discount bins, and sale sections are all full of hidden treasures worth seeking out. 

Remember, Technology is Your Friend

Since your phone is most likely nearby right now, it’s time to put it to good use. Look into rewards programs at the stores you frequent or online retailers. Yup, getting paid to shop does add up when you have lots of gifts to buy. Sites like Rakuten or Swagbucks allow you to accumulate points to get cash back or gift cards. 

As mentioned before, signing up for emails is another great way to find the best deals. Creating a separate email account for these notifications ensures your regular account doesn’t get over-flooded with offers. Plus, it reduces impulse buying tendencies for whenever you see a sale item. Price matching tools and coupons can be tracked down online as well. A simple Google search can pull in codes to use and deal sites for sale items.

Examine Your Payment Options

In addition to hunting for gift deals, seek out the best payment option too. If you overspend a lot, having a cash envelope system can curb this tendency. Using cash will give you a good idea of what you have to spend, and when all your money is gone, that’s it.

However, in today’s world, credit, and debit cards are popular options for online shopping. Although they make payments easier and give you a larger spending range, they can come back to bite you if you’re not careful about the fees that are associated with using them. When looking for financially-friendly options, whether it’s a bank account or an app that helps you stay on track with your savings, find options without hidden costs and that make it possible to rebuild your financial status. That way, if you have a lower credit score or you’re looking to prioritize financial wellness during the course of your holiday shopping, you won’t feel stressed or overwhelmed when purchasing gifts for your friends and family.  

While achieving savings during the holiday shopping season seems tricky, it’s possible with the proper planning! By creating a shopping list, rethinking what gifts you can make yourself or buy second hand, using technology to track deals, and finding the right payment option for you. Following all of these tips will help you stay in the green, rather than the red this holiday season.

Super Smart Tips For Building Up Your Savings During the Holiday Shopping Season

Loneliness: The Military Spouse’s Companion

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So happy to have this guest post by Victoria on loneliness and what you can do about it during military life. Please email me at Julie@soldierswifecrazylife.com and let me know if you would like to write a guest post for Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life too.

Loneliness: The Military Spouse’s Companion

“I’m having trouble fitting in around here.”

“How can I make friends at this new base?”

I see these comments or variations on many military spouse websites. And, of course, the pandemic didn’t help the feeling of loneliness and isolation. If you are a MilSpo, you have felt this at one time or another. You’ve just moved to a new location. You haven’t had time to explore your new community or meet the neighbors, what with unpacking boxes and enrolling the kids in their new school, and getting them settled.

When we moved to Oklahoma in 2009, my adult daughter was concerned because we had been there for a few months, and I wasn’t talking about any new friends yet. I’m uber extroverted, so for me not to be relating stories about all the new friends I’d made by now was disconcerting for her.

The problem was that we only had one car, and we didn’t live on base, so it was harder for me to get around and meet people. I assured her I was okay, and I had a lunch date with a group of women the next day. Life was good, although I was more than ready to get my social life going.

I’m afraid my advice for counteracting loneliness might not sit well with introverts. However, it is necessary if you want to get the most out of your military assignment. 

Get Out: You have to get out of your house and introduce yourself to your neighbors—whether you live on base or post. People are busy, so the days when neighbors stopped by with a plate of cookies are rare, even though their intentions might be good. In Oklahoma, I made the cookies and took them to the neighbors to introduce myself.

Join In: Join, join, join anything that interests you: spouse clubs, chapel groups, the PTA at your children’s school. Anywhere you can find like-minded people. Spouse clubs usually have smaller clubs such as book clubs, Bunko, golf, bowling, Mahjong — just about anything you are interested in doing.

Volunteer: When you help out others, you are helping yourself as well. So many organizations on base can use your help, and I’ve made some of my closest friends through volunteering. Check with your Family Readiness Center for volunteer opportunities on your installation.

Do It: I can hear some of you already saying you are shy and have a tough time putting yourself out there. My response is to say, “too bad. Suck it up and do it anyway.” Sorry if that sounds harsh, but it is necessary to make an effort to find your niche if you want to get the most enjoyment out of your life as a MilSpo. And remember, the more you do it, the easier it gets!

Loneliness: The Military Spouse’s Companion

Victoria Terrinoni is the author of “Where You Go, I Will Go: Lessons From a Military Spouse,” available on Amazon. Her husband, Dave, retired in 2018 after 31 years in the Air Force. They live in central Illinois so that they can spoil two of their four grandchildren. She has a blog about her military life at https://victoriaterrinoni.wordpress.com

Exploring Ft. Liberty, NC: Unforgettable Day Trips for Military Families

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Welcome to Ft. Liberty, North Carolina, a haven for military families seeking adventure, relaxation, and unforgettable experiences. Nestled in the heart of this welcoming community, you’ll discover a treasure trove of day trip destinations that cater to solo parents and families alike. Join us as we embark on a journey of exploration, from sandy beaches to majestic mountains, picturesque waterfalls, and family-friendly attractions. Let’s create cherished memories together in this charming region.

One of the best ways to create lasting memories and explore your new surroundings is by going on day trips. These excursions are perfect for single parents looking to bond with their children and for families seeking quality time together. Before you hit the road, consider packing essentials like snacks, water, first-aid supplies, and a sense of adventure.

Ft. Liberty’s Natural Wonders – Waterfall Road Trips

Linville Falls, NC, USA

Crabtree Falls Trail, Spruce Pine, United States

There are over 250 waterfalls in NC! If you want a specific curated road trip, you can hit up to 8 beautiful scenic waterfalls in 5 hours. This list consists of Linville Falls, Crabtree Falls, Looking Glass Falls, Moore Cove Falls, Cove Creek Falls, Sliding Rock (our favorite!), Dry Falls, and Upper Whitewater Falls (source:  https://www.onlyinyourstate.com/north-carolina/nc-waterfalls-road-trip/)

If you’re wanting to make a Waterfall Weekend trip, consider checking out the North Carolina ByWays provided by the NC Department of Transportation. On pg. 18 you will find the Waterfall Byway which leads you through the ultimate NC waterfall road trip of 200 waterfalls. But wait, there’s more! This handy NC guide features multiple scenic routes throughout the state for any nature loving family. The Sandhills Scenic Drive and Averasboro Battlefield Scenic Byway are two close-to-home routes.

Beach Day! Kure Beach at Ft. Fisher is barely Two Hours Away

Kure Beach, North Carolina United States

If your family loves sandy shores and salty breezes, a visit to Ft. Fisher is a must. This beach not only offers sun and surf but also extends military discounts as a heartwarming gesture of gratitude for your service.

Ft. Fisher isn’t just any beach; it’s a destination filled with history, natural beauty, and exciting opportunities for family fun. Here’s what you can expect:

1. The Beach: Spend a day at Ft. Fisher building sandcastles, swimming in the gentle waves, and picnicking with your loved ones. The wide, sandy shores provide ample space for families to spread out and enjoy their beach day to the fullest. Don’t forget to bring the hot dogs! Fort Fisher State Recreation Area has charcoal friendly grills and a picnic area. This beach is pet-friendly with watering stations as well.

2. Southport – A Ferry Ride Away: Want to add a touch of cinematic charm to your visit? Ft. Fisher is just a short ferry ride away from Southport, a quaint coastal town famous for being the filming location of “Safe Haven.” Stroll along the charming streets, visit the picturesque waterfront, and relive moments from the beloved movie. Some of our favorite shops are The Christmas Shop (there’s a candy store in the back!) and Bullfrog Corner.

3. Free Parking: Ft. Fisher offers free public parking, making it convenient for military families to access the beach without worrying about additional expenses. This perk adds to the appeal of this already budget-friendly destination. Anywhere else in the Carolina Beach/Wilmington area has paid parking which can add up quickly. 

4. Ft. Fisher Museum: While at Ft. Fisher, take a detour to the Ft. Fisher State Historic Site and Museum. Explore the exhibits and learn about the area’s Civil War history, including the pivotal Battle of Ft. Fisher. It’s an educational opportunity for the whole family.

5. Camping: For the adventurous souls among you, Ft. Fisher allows camping right by the beach, and Carolina State Park allows camping directly on the beach. Imagine falling asleep to the sound of ocean waves and waking up to breathtaking sunrises over the Atlantic. It’s a unique experience that will leave you with lasting memories. Ft. Fisher is pet-friendly!

If you’re looking to savor some local flavors as part of your beach experience, be sure to check out these dining options:

Britt’s Donuts on the Boardwalk: Treat your taste buds to the sweet delight of fresh, melt-in-your-mouth donuts available at Britt’s Donuts. They are a cherished tradition on the boardwalk. They are a cash-only operation so make sure you bring plenty!

Island Burgers and Bites: Believe it or not, some of the best burgers can be found in a gas station! Island Burgers and Bites offer delicious burgers that will satisfy your cravings.

Kate’s Pancake House: Start your day with a hearty breakfast at Kate’s Pancake House, known for their mouth watering pancakes and a cozy, family-friendly atmosphere.

Ft. Fisher is more than just a beach; it’s a complete coastal experience for military families, where history, relaxation, and fun come together in a beautiful setting. So, pack your sunscreen and towels, and get ready for an unforgettable day at Ft. Fisher.

Camping and Mountains: 

For families who crave the great outdoors, Ft. Liberty is surrounded by lush mountains and offers excellent camping opportunities. Whether you’re a seasoned camper or a newbie, the serene mountain landscapes and clear night skies make for a memorable experience. There are plenty of options for cabin rentals, campground camping, dispersed camping, group camping, and RV camping. Visit the National Forest in North Carolina website for more information on sites, rules, and how to make reservations. 

Thrills and Adventures – Carowinds

If you’re in the mood for thrills and laughter, Carowinds amusement park is a must-visit. Packed with family-friendly attractions, it promises an action-packed day for everyone. From roller coasters to live entertainment, Carowinds has it all. Check their website for military discounts.

If you like Spooky Season like me, don’t miss out on Scarowinds!  This is the highly anticipated seasonal transformation of a screaming good time that offers mazes, scare zones, shows, and more.  Get your tickets and Fast Lane passes early- they go quick!

Wild Encounters

North Carolina Zoo, Asheboro, United States

If you are an animal lover, you’re in luck!  There are quite a few options to see animals near Ft. Liberty, here are some of our favorites:

NC Zoo: Located in Asheboro, the NC Zoo is a fantastic place to explore the animal kingdom. Consider getting a membership to enjoy year-round visits and skip-the-line privileges. With the NC Zoo membership you also get a discount for the NC Aquarium. If you’re planning on taking either of these trips more than once a year, it pays for itself. Bring your walking shoes- the NC Zoo has 500 developed acres making it the world’s largest natural habitat zoo.

NC Zoo Pro-Tip: The Zoo is sectioned by continent. Park in the North America Parking lot. Once inside the Zoo, take the tram to the Africa Tram Stop. Work your way back through the Zoo going through Africa, Asia, and North America. Then voila- you don’t have to take the tram back to your car at a very congested time. 

You can do this the other way as well- park at Africa, ride the tram to North America, and work your way south.  However, keep in mind North America houses the Garden Friends Playground. This will allow you some rest time while the kids play before you load back up into the car. Entrance times, shuttle times, and tram times vary throughout the year. Always check the times before you go!

NC Aquarium: Dive into the wonders of the deep at the NC Aquarium. Like the zoo, memberships and discounts are available, making it a budget-friendly option. Marvel at colorful fish, playful otters, an albino alligator, and even sharks. There are plenty of hands-on opportunities for little ones and different activities throughout the year. You can even plan a birthday party or participate in a sleepover!

North Carolina Aquarium at Fort Fisher Pro Tip- get your tickets online in advance! This will help you have a hassle free entry the day of.

A little closer to home with Aloha Safari Park: Whether you want to feed a giraffe or invite a zebra to give you a nuzzle in the drive-through safari, this park has some amazing animals!  Aloha Safari Park houses over 300 animals and they specialize in caring for animals that came from homes where they were not taken care of previously.  

Our State Capitol: Raleigh, NC

While there are tons of things to do in Raleigh, we usually go for the museums and the food. Choosing between the dinosaur and the life-size Connect Four game can be hard, but somebody’s gotta do it!  Luckily Raleigh isn’t too far away.

North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences: Welcome to the Southeast’s largest natural history museum. Yes, there’s a dinosaur. This museum has it all: a kid-friendly discovery room, an arthropod zoo, a nature research center, a live sloth, and more. They also host multiple events throughout the year that cater to all audiences.

Marbles Kids Museum: Ever wanted to play chess with life-sized pieces? This is your kind of place! From a pirate ship playland to interactive brain-nurturing hands-on activities, this is a great place to take the whole family. The grownups have just as much fun as the kids.

Time to pack your bags

Now it’s time to pack your bags, bring your sense of wonder, and embark on these incredible journeys.  The adventure awaits, and the memories are yours to make. Welcome to North Carolina!

Hey there! I’m Andrea McGillivray, a military spouse with over 20 years of firsthand experience navigating the unique challenges faced by military families. I’m honored to be a contributing blogger for Pioneer Military Credit, a trusted provider of personal military loans for service members. Pioneer is committed to helping military families navigate the challenges of military life through its financial products and educational resources on its website.

That National Guard Life From a National Guard Spouse

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Happy to have this guest post by Olivia on National Guard life! Want to write a guest post for Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life? Please email me at Julie@soldierswifecrazylife.com and let me know! I take pieces on anything milspouse related, from deployment tips to duty station review.

That National Guard Life From a National Guard Spouse

I used to think military life was easy, fun, and quite frankly, no big deal. My spouse’s National Guard drill weekends were no issue because I would just go shopping with friends, spend time with family, eat all of the take-out Chinese food I wanted, etc.

So, the saying about things getting easier with time…I don’t think that always applies in the case of military life. 

You get older. You start a family. Family gatherings grow in size and number. Activities and events start to infiltrate the fridge calendar.

You start to overhear conversations like, “Hey dad, are you coming to my soccer game this weekend?” “I’m sorry buddy, I have to go away this weekend. I’m sorry I’ll miss it.” Again. He’s so sorry he will miss yet another game. Another practice. Another swimming lesson. Another family barbeque to celebrate someone’s birthday. The list goes on.

I can see the look on my husband’s face, and then in my son’s eyes. Sadness, disappointment, hurt, felt on both ends. You’re probably thinking, it’s one game or one practice, the child won’t remember. And you’re absolutely right if it was just one or two here and there.

However, it’s close to 50-75% of the time with all activities and day-to-day life in our household. I’m sure many people think the National Guard is just one weekend per month and a two-week training in the summer each year. 

Well, I wish it was just that, but that is far from the truth. For example, this year alone, my husband was gone for just under three months right after Christmas.

He was stateside, which was nice, but I work full-time and there was no way we could make a trip out to visit him a reality. This summer felt like a nice break because he literally just had drill weekends and that was it.

Well, here we are going into the fall, and into a new budget year for the National Guard, and the calendar is filling back up with additional trips to the guard base for additional duties to be completed. And, those are just the planned trips. You never know when a call will come in to go assist here or there, a week or two weeks gone. 

“It’s totally what you signed up for though, right?” I get this question or similar comments whenever I mention something related to my husband’s schedule. Yes, you are correct, when my husband was 17 years old, he signed on the dotted line and is literally owned by the government until further notice. I don’t know how a 17-year-old could’ve known exactly what this life would be like, but he signed up and has been committed to them for just shy of 20 years now.

On the positive flip side, I have family who keep a similar calendar of drill and military-related events on their calendar, and they are mindful of those when planning family events. I can’t tell you how happy this makes my heart! Some get it, some don’t, and that is okay- you work around your schedule and their schedule to the best of your ability. 

Other things that don’t seem to get easier or better with time, and often bring a sense of unnecessary guilt: 1. Repeatedly saying, “Sorry we can’t come, he has drill that weekend.” 2. “Don’t plan around us, you know how our schedule is.” 3. “This is our first weekend together as a family in three weeks, so no we aren’t going to plan anything.”  4. “Yes, we let our kids stay the night with grandparents just so we can have a couple of hours alone this month.” 

You’re able to recognize that some have it way harder or worse than you. You’re able to rationally tell yourself that you’ll get through this and it’s not that bad. But that doesn’t minimize the stress that you’re experiencing and comparing your situation to someone else’s just isn’t realistic. Everyone is different and we all deal with things differently. 

With all of this complaining or over-explaining, there are a few things that are amazing when it comes to the National Guard life. Amazing friends that just get it and don’t think twice about rescheduling something five times, because they are in the same boat.

The excitement on my kids’ faces when they see dad fly over during a training mission. The fancy dining out ceremonies that give us a few hours to relive our prom days. The pride in knowing that my husband and fellow National Guard soldiers do so much for our community and country. And, did I mention the ability to have as much Chinese take-out as you want on drill weekends? Yeah, that hasn’t changed a bit. 

The National Guard life is different from other branches of service, and yet still comes with its own set of challenges. If you’re a National Guard spouse, just know that I hear you & see you. And if you want to get take-out on drill weekends, I fully support you 😉  

Olivia Moser is a National Guard spouse of a CW04 CH-47 Pilot in the Nebraska Army National Guard. They have two children and an active puppy at home. She is a member of the Soldier Family Readiness Group (SFRG) for her husband’s current unit and is a member of the local Auxiliary Legion post. Olivia works full-time as a Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner (LIMHP) and Clinical Program Manager with the State of Nebraska. She is a trained crisis negotiator, forensic interviewer, and QPR suicide prevention facilitator. She is also on the state’s Critical Incident Stress Management (CISM) team. 

Go to ne.ng.mil for more information about the NEARNG

https://ne.ng.mil/FPO is a resource for Warrior & Family Support in the NEARNG

3 Ways Military Spouses Can Jump Start Their Careers Right Now

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Hiring Our Heroes

In 2010, when I married my airman on a random weekend with a hastily made supermarket bouquet in a Texas courthouse, I had not even heard the words “military spouse employment programs.” 

In fact, I wasn’t even sure why I would need a military spouse employment program. I wasn’t aware of what I was about to encounter when my new life and my career path collided. But collide they did – and I soon found myself no longer evaluating career opportunities on merit, my skillset, or what sounded like fun. 

I was evaluating every employment opportunity on the question, “Can I make this job work?”

Looking back, that makes my heart hurt a little. 

I know so many spouses that have done the same soul-searching when forcing jobs to fit. I was fortunate to eventually find a rewarding career after many challenging decisions and a double dose of hard work. 

Twelve years later, I see not limitations, but possibilities for military spouses seeking meaningful career opportunities. Military spouses, I am here to tell you that the time is now to jump-start your professional career. 

Are you ready? Here are 3 ways to do it.

Take Advantage of Returnship and Internship Programs for Military Spouses
Returnships are designed for those returning to work. As I look at employer trends in the latter half of the year, I see many companies committing to returnships and internships for professionals and new grads who put their careers on hold in 2020. These programs provide a professional boost to anyone who took some time off from work and has a gap on their resume, or to those who are looking to pivot into a new industry.

You can visit an employer’s career webpage to see if they have this type of program available. If you search their site and can’t find anything specific to returnships, try connecting with a recruiter for that organization on LinkedIn and asking about return-to-work options. 

Internships and fellowships can also be used to jump back in, but there’s usually also a component of new work experience with these programs. For this reason, fellowships are perfect for career-pivoters. Career-pivoters are new to their field. They are also those who want to explore the ins and outs of life at a particular company before accepting a full-time job offer. 

To find internship programs, check with your educational institution. Or if you live in one of eight service locations, apply for the Military Spouse Fellowship Program at Hiring Our Heroes. This unique program is a paid, six-week experience on the job with one of the program’s host companies. In 2021, this experience led to a full-time job offer for 92% of participants. 

Use the New Remote Work Landscape to Upskill and Reskill into Portable Career 

There is an explosion of remote and hybrid work opportunities now, rendering your next PCS a small inconvenience instead of a career-stopper. 

The demand for remote workers is especially high in the tech space. These jobs are very competitive, so to have a leg up, consider adding some new skills to your repertoire. Thankfully, as military spouses, we have access to a variety of educational benefits and support organizations to do this at no cost. 

If you are eyeing jobs in fields like UX/UI design, project management, IT support, digital marketing, or data analytics, you may want to check out the Career Forward program at Hiring Our Heroes. This learner-to-earner program can take you from career dreams to job offers with the help of our staff. 

If you love data management or have already begun to learn about careers in the rapidly growing customer relationship management (CRM) software industry, take a look at the Hiring Our Heroes’ Salesforce Fellowship Program. 

Military spouses are eligible for free training to learn Salesforce through Salesforce Military. After earning the Salesforce administrator certification, you can receive hands-on work experience using your new Salesforce skills with a fellowship at one of 55 host companies located nationwide. The program currently has a 95% job offer rate.

Leverage Your Network

One glaringly obvious issue that has always made military spouse career progression difficult is the lack of professional connections when we arrive to a new area and the inability to maintain a network as we move around. 

The importance of networking is not waning and, with digital tools and groups, professional networking is easier than ever. 

Invest time in LinkedIn – it’s not just about your profile! Once you have most of your profile filled out, connect with people who work at companies you are interested in, who are experienced in your industry, or who have a common interest with you. Take a few minutes each day to comment on their posts and post your own job search updates to your network. 

While you’re leveraging your network, lean on your fellow military spouses. 

The Hiring Our Heroes Military Spouse Professional Network has a presence virtually and at 55 locations around the world. MSPN provides online career development resources and virtual networking platforms to help military spouses build their professional network before they arrive at a new military installation. 

In case you haven’t heard it lately, your professional goals are important. You have so much to offer the business community as a talented, adaptable, and knowledgeable military spouse. There’s never been a better time to demonstrate your value as an employee. I hope you’ll take the first step toward achieving professional success according to your own definition. 

And if you need additional support, there’s much more to discover at Hiring Our Heroes including webinars, virtual hiring fairs, Amplify career intensives, and Career Connectors to help you navigate it all. 

Good luck – you’ve got this!

Danielle Lankford is the San Antonio & Dallas/Fort Worth Program Manager for the Military Spouse Fellowship Program at Hiring Our Heroes. Hiring Our Heroes is an initiative of the U.S. Chamber of Commerce Foundation. You can connect with Danielle on LinkedIn. 

My Experience as a Hispanic Military Spouse

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My Experience as a Hispanic Military Spouse

How I Learned English and Thrived

La Isla del Encanto. Have you heard of that place? It is a small island in the Caribbean. Puerto Rico is a paradise with captivating beauty and culture. The home where I spent the first 19 years of my life. During my teenage years, I often told my parents that I was never leaving my home, my community, or my country. Learning English at school was a struggle, and I was not interested in making an effort. I thought it was pointless. Ironically, after high school graduation, my boyfriend joined the U.S. Air Force; and you can probably guess what happened after that. I left my family, my home, and my country. 

Not even in my wildest dreams would I have thought of living on the other side of the world. But, you guess again, my new home was not in the United States but in Japan. Have you watched Men in Black II? In the final scene, Agent K calls Agent J a rookie and kicks a door open. Agent J is shocked to find out that the world as he knows it is just a part of something bigger. That is how I felt when I arrived in Okinawa, my husband’s first duty station. 

Soon enough, I regretted my past lack of effort in learning English. Speaking with others was not only challenging but nerve-wracking. It is accurate to say it was impossible. Keeping up with the speed at which people spoke was difficult. It did not help that I would try to translate everything from English to Spanish in my mind. I could not understand a word or form a sentence, for that matter. I was frustrated and lacked confidence. So what did I do? 

I enrolled in an online university to continue my education. My first class was English. This time, I was determined to learn; and I did, but it was challenging every day. I know completing my school work took longer just because of the language barrier. Countless tears, sleepless nights, and six years later, I earned my B.A. in Psychology from Penn State University. During those six years, I moved three times and had two children. It has been ten years since I became a military spouse, and I have learned many lessons. 

From mistakes I made to things I would do differently, this is my advice: 

● Prioritize wellness. Seek professional support sooner than later. 

● Choose approach over avoidance. 

● Do not isolate yourself. 

● Take your time but do it. 

● Everything takes practice. Take the first step. 

● Find resources! There are many now. 

● Ask for help; there are kind and caring people out there. 

● Get social and take advantage of social media platforms. 

● Stay connected to family and friends. It is still possible when you are far.

● Keep a balance.

● Do not compare yourself to others; follow your path.

● Believe in yourself. 

I wish you the best in this challenging and incredible journey!

Here are more resources that I have found useful:

Written by guest writer, Lourdes Gonzalez!

Why All Military Spouses Should Join the Military Spouse Advocacy Network (MSAN)

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Why All Military Spouses Should Join the Military Spouse Advocacy Network

I’ve been a military spouse for a little over a year now. Prior to becoming a milspouse, my husband and I dated long distance for years. This was great “training” for what life would be like together- but apart. I always joined the local FRG to access information, discover local meet-ups, and meet new people. I WISH I had known about the support offered by MSAN.

Flash forward to this year I decided upon a career change for many reasons, one of which was the uncertainties in life that come with being a milspouse. I discovered MSAN through LinkedIn and am taken back by the network of support that is offered. MSAN has connected me with so many other spouses who have pointed me in the right direction on the path to a new career. It is incredible how many phone calls, messages, and job postings have been shared with me through other members of MSAN.

I became a mentor with MSAN this past June. I am grateful to have the opportunity to give back to other spouses, the way many spouses have done for me. As a mentor, I help others navigate the ins and outs of TRICARE, DEERS, and other military-related services. MSAN mentors also offer a listening ear, for we are all in this together. One of my favorite parts of being a mentor at MSAN is my responsibility to post a new recipe every “Tasty Thursday” on our Mentorship HUB. Curious about MSAN? Shoot me a message! I would love to connect you with our resources. 

Nina Dahl is a Plant mom and pizza enthusiast on the search for the best slice in Florida. Loves her new job, her family, and going to the beach. Energized by CrossFit, helping others, and romance novels. You can contact Nina at ndahl@milspouseadvocacynetwork.org or find her on LinkedIn.