• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

  • Home
    • My Disclosure Policy
    • My Privacy Policy
    • Contact Me
  • Advertise
  • The SWCL Shop
  • Duty Stations
  • My Writings
  • Military Life
    • Movies & TV
    • Disneyland
    • Books
  • So Your Spouse Just Deployed??? Click Here!!!
  • Fort Campbell
You are here: Home / Deployment / To the Burned Out Solo Parent

To the Burned Out Solo Parent

February 12, 2019 by Julie 2 Comments

To the Burned Out Solo Parent

It’s almost bedtime, almost. You start your bedtime routine at 6:30 on the dot and if all goes well, the kids will be asleep by 7:30, or 8:30, usually by 9, but sometimes even as late as 10:00. It just depends.

If your spouse is deployed at the moment, it really doesn’t matter how long bedtime takes, it will still be 100% on you to get those kids to bed. There will be no trading off nights, no asking for help, no relief if you had a burned out day and need to just chill by yourself for a bit.

Solo parenting doesn’t allow that.

Solo parenting means you play both mom and dad, even if you are tired.

Solo parenting means you make all the daily decisions for the kids, and that can get exhausting.

Solo parenting means you can’t wait for the little bit of me time you get after the kids go to bed, but know you will probably just want to go to sleep yourself.

The first time I ever became a solo parent my son was 13 months old. It was quite a shock to the system. And one I never fully got used to. Everything was on me. And at times, I felt like I couldn’t get it done.

So to the burned out solo parent, I get it. This is hard. Really hard.

You have too much to do, you just do

That’s the reality of the situation. You have to prioritize and let some things go. You can’t do it all, and if you try, solo parenting will be that much more difficult for you. You are doing everything you have to do and stepping in for the other parent as well.

Keep this in mind when you feel like you can’t get it all done, you weren’t supposed to get it all done. Some things can wait for the next day, the next week, or even when they get back home.

You have to stay busy

Staying home all day, every day, with children and no spouse coming home at night is going to make this whole deployment thing a bit more complicated.

Find places to go, even if you just walk down to the park. Find people to hang out with, even if it is just for an hour. Find new hobbies, and get your kids involved in them too.

You have to give yourself a break

What you are doing is not easy, and a lot of people might never understand what solo parenting is really like. They might say things that annoy you or piss you off. They just don’t totally understand.

But don’t let them get you down. Figure out what works for you and your kids and do it, even if what you choose to do is different than the norm.

Find that me time

I know, it’s hard to find time for yourself but see what you can do. Things that have helped me along the way were hourly care on post, MOPS, PWOC, trading babysitting with friends, having family come and help, spending time on myself after the kids go to bed, and being able to say no sometimes. Taking care of ourselves is so important too, we can’t forget that in the midst of our solo parenting days.

So to the burned out solo parent, think of one thing you could do right now to help ease some of the stress. Write it down, make a plan to get it done, or ask a friend to help you. There are things you can do to make this part of military life a little bit easier.

How do you make things a little easier for yourself when you are in a season of solo parenting?

Last Updated on February 3, 2020 by Writer

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Print

Filed Under: Deployment, Military Life Tagged With: military spouse, solo parent, surviving deployment

About Julie

Owner of Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life. Writer, reader, coffee drinker. Mom to three boys, wife of a National Guard soldier. Living life in Tennessee.

Previous Post: « When Your Spouse is Deployed and You Only Have Two Hands
Next Post: 9 Things You Wish Were True About Military Life »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Jen

    April 1, 2019 at 10:28 pm

    Soak yourself in the Bible and you will find strength and patience from that. I had four kids with the oldest in first grade, homeschooled. My recharge and refuge was after all the kids were finally asleep, I’d sit on the couch and read my Bible for about 20-30’ every night. Man, did that ever save my sanity!

    Reply
  2. Mamabear

    May 14, 2020 at 8:17 pm

    Great advice pre covid. I’m currently on day 60 at home with my kids with no break what so ever. Hard to make plans to trade babysitting when you can’t see other people. 🙁

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Primary Sidebar

Top Posts!!!

  • 14 Tips to Help You Survive Basic Training When Your Spouse Joins the Military
  • The 5 Best Things That Can Happen To A Military Spouse
  • The Night Before They Deploy
  • Living in Rota, Spain
  • 10 Things To Know About Being Stationed At Fort Campbell
  • 18 Military Spouse Memes When You Just Need A Good Laugh

About Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life

Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Welcome to Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life! I am so glad you are here.

My name is Julie and I have been a military spouse for 16 years!

My husband of 19 years has served in the active-duty Army and now the Army National Guard. We have lived in Germany & Tennessee during our time as a military family.

We have three boys and have been through four deployments together.

I hope that you can find support for your own deployments, PCS moves, or anything else military life brings you 🙂

~Contact Me~
Military Life Products
Favorite Books!

Sign up for your FREE Guide to the First 30 Days of Deployment!


Thank you!

Check your email for confirmation! 

.
Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy

Footer

Archives

Copyright © 2022 Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life on the Foodie Pro Theme

We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies.
Cookie settingsACCEPT
Manage consent

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
CookieDurationDescription
cookielawinfo-checbox-analytics11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
cookielawinfo-checbox-functional11 monthsThe cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
cookielawinfo-checbox-others11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
viewed_cookie_policy11 monthsThe cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
Functional
Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
Performance
Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
Analytics
Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
Advertisement
Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
Others
Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet.
SAVE & ACCEPT