Military Life

7 Tips For A Brand New Military Spouse Mom

August 20, 2019 by Julie

Did you just find out you are pregnant? A little nervous about becoming a mom? Not sure how things will go with a spouse in the military?

Here are 7 tips for a brand new military spouse mom:

Get Your Free Breast Pump

If you didn’t already know, you can get a free breast pump with your TRICARE benefit. How does this work? Each TRICARE beneficiary, no matter the type of service member your spouse is, or their rank, is able to receive one breast pump per birth event, which is a birth or adoption.

There are several companies that work with you to easily get your breast pump through TRICARE. You do need to have a prescription, and you will have to stick to their spending limits. You can also receive breast pump accessories through TRICARE. You can read more about that all here.

Figure Out Your Birth Plan

Before giving birth, you should think about how you want things to go. If you want to have a natural birth, if that is important to you at all, you need to plan for having a natural birth. There are a lot of things you can do to prepare from taking natural birth classes, to learning special labor exercises.

In addition to what type of birth you want, you need to figure out who will be with you during the birth. If your spouse is going to be deployed while you give birth, who will be with you instead? Can you ask a friend or would you rather have your mom or sister there? These are some of the things you need to plan than your civilian friends don’t have to think about.

Make Mom Friends

When you have a new baby, you are going to want to meet other moms who also have kids similar ages. There are many different ways to do so. You don’t have to start motherhood alone.

You can go to your local MOPS group, there are even some Military MOPS groups at certain duty stations. You can find a local playgroup, where you meet once a week and allow your baby to “play” while you chat with the other parents. You can also connect with other moms online, from joining a due date group to a local group with moms in your area.

Signing Up For TRICARE

You are going to want to make sure you sign your newborn up for TRICARE as soon as possible. You start by signing them up for DEERs, which stands for Defense Enrollment Eligibility Reporting System. You have 90 days to do so if you are in the states, and 120 days if you are overseas.

After they are in DEERS, they will automatically be put into TRICARE Prime if you are in a Prime Service Area. If not, they will be put into TRICARE Select. You then have 90 days to change to a different plan if you want to.

If you are overseas, they will be automatically enrolled to TRICARE Select and you will have 90 days to change to TRICARE Overseas as long as they are Command Sponsored.

If you are a National Guard or Reserve family, you would need to sign up them for TRICARE Reserve Select if you are using that insurance. You would also need to sign them up for DEERS as active duty does.

Keep in mind that you don’t have to have their social security number when you sign them up for DEERS and can add that later after you receive it. This also applies to adopted children as well as children you are adding to your family. Please visit TRICARE for the most updated information on this as well as other details about the process.

Baby Stuff Everywhere

One of the things about having a new baby is you are going to be tempted to buy all the things. There are so many different products out there, for almost anything you can think of. Think about what you would really need and what will work best for you and your baby.

We always loved having a co-sleeper of some kind, a stroller, and a good baby carrier. Talk to your friends about the products they have loved and used. You can always wait until after they are born for many of the baby items.

Shopping second hand will save you a lot of money. When I was pregnant with my 3rd little boy, I went around on the post-wide garage sale day and found so many things I needed for super cheap. Some baby items only get used a few times and can still be in good condition. Just be careful about buying products like a crib, and car seat second hand and read up on any recalls that might have come out.

The CDC Is Your Best Friend

The CDC, Child Development Center at your duty station should offer some sort of hourly care option. Hourly care saved my life. When we were a new military family, with a young 18-month-old, I signed him up and took him several times a week.

I loved how flexible hourly care was, how he got to play with other kids, and they always seem to give us free hours during a deployment. The CDC saved me during deployments, and any other time I needed a break from my kids, even if it was just to have a few hours to myself.

I know some CDCs might have some issues. I would look into your CDC, talk to other moms, and see if using hourly care could be a good option for you. They might also have regular pre-school type programs if you want something more regular for your child.

Solo Parenting Can Be Rough

Solo parenting is going to be apart of your life if you are a military spouse. Sometimes you might be alone for a few weeks, other times, for a few months. Hopefully, you won’t have to go as long as we did during our first deployment.

Being a solo parent is all about finding what will work for you and your kids. You will have to take the days one at a time. You might also have to give up on some parenting ideals.

However, you will figure everything out. There is a lot of support out there through friends and even your military installation. You don’t have to go through all of this all by yourself. Don’t be afraid to reach out, and remember, you won’t be a solo parent forever.

How long have you been a mom? What are your best tips for the new military spouse mom?

How To Stay Married When The Military Is In Charge

August 1, 2019 by Julie

On Saturday, my husband and I will celebrate 17 years of marriage. Our marriage is now old enough to see rated R movies without a parent 😉 Sometimes it feels like those 17 years flew by, and other times I feel as though my wedding day was a lifetime ago.

I have learned so much during the last 17 years. About my husband, about marriage, about raising kids together, and how to be a military wife.

My husband joined the Army when we had been married for about three years. Everything before that was so different. We have had our Germany years and our Fort Campbell years and are now in our National Guard years.

Our boys are getting older, one is just about three years away from being an adult himself. We have one son with Autism and have had other challenges with our kids to figure out over the last 15 years.

We have been through four deployments, and too many other times apart to count. Lately, he has been home more often than he has ever been. I am not sure how long this will last, but this time together has been so needed.

I always feel a bit funny giving marriage advice. For a while, that was because I hadn’t been married long enough. Then, I just wasn’t sure if my advice would apply to anyone who read it. I have friends whose marriages haven’t lasted, even though they went into them with that as a plan.

I know so many people that are living a completely different life than they thought they would, with a completely different person than they started out with. Life happens, and you never really know how that will change you or your spouse.

But, as I look at my upcoming anniversary, I can’t help but think about what has worked and what hasn’t. I can’t help but think about what my marriage has gone through and what challenges we have faced over the years.

I don’t claim to have the secrets about how to stay married when you are in the military. Everyone has a different story. Everyone is dealing with their own experiences.

Marriage is never easy, but I do think there are things you can do to help keep you stay married over the miles, and over the years.

Forgive Often

You are going to have to forgive each other and do so often. Whenever you live with another person, they are going to piss you off. They are going to get on your nerves sometimes, and you could find yourself holding a bit of a grudge if they wrong you in some way.

Obviously, there are exceptions. You don’t have to forgive someone who cheated on you. You don’t have to put up with abuse. But, in your day-to-day, try to forgive the little things. They usually aren’t worth holding on to.

Know Your Spouse’s Personality

This is something I feel like I didn’t quite get until the last few years. And if I had realized this earlier, things might have been a bit easier for me. I knew going in my husband is a completely different person than I am, but there is so much more to that that can affect your everyday.

The 5 Love Languages Military Edition: The Secret to Love That Lasts (this is an affiliate link) book is a good start. You can also take an Enneagram test to figure out you and your partner’s personality type as well as taking a Myers-Briggs test. These also can be good for friendships and getting along with people in general.

Knowing how your spouse works, how they feel loved, and what is important to them will help so much when certain struggles come up in your marriage. While “treat others like you want to be treated” can be good advice, it doesn’t always work 100%. Over the years I have learned more about what my husband appreciates and what he doesn’t care too much about.

One example is care packages. Some spouses love them. I know I would.

If I was deployed and my husband sent me a care package I would feel so loved. But for my husband? It is different. While he would appreciate one, receiving a care package wouldn’t be the same as it would be for me. When he is deployed, I don’t need to send him one on a regular basis, but that isn’t true for every deployed service member.

Communicate Expectations Before They Deploy

Talking about your expectations before a deployment starts is so important. Talk about how often you need to hear from them, care packages, and even how you will be spending your money during a deployment.

There are so many times when frustrating situations come up because each spouse has a different idea of how things are going to be during a deployment. While you can’t prepare for everything, communicating about deployment expectations will go a long way in helping your marriage when they are gone.

Talk Things Over

Constantly talking things over with your spouse is a must. You want to be on the same page about what you guys are going through. You don’t want to keep big things from each other.

If your children are very young and date nights are hard to come by, make use of the time after they go to bed. Cook a nice dinner, and have some conversations. You can connect this way, without even leaving your home.

If you can go on regular date nights, do so. They can make for the perfect time to talk about your lives, what is going on with both of you, and what you want for the future. Lately, my husband and have been going out a couple of times a month.

We can have some fun, kid-free time together and let each other know how things are going. Sometimes during the workweek, we are ships passing in the night, so having that time together is very important to our marriage.

If your spouse is deployed, this type of thing can be difficult, especially if it isn’t easy to communicate. Writing letters can help, as well as trying to connect when you can. Other times you might just have to make some decisions on your own and tell them about them later.

During my husband’s first deployment, we went a whole month without talking with each other. That was just the way things were, so a lot of things I had to handle all by myself. That time wasn’t easy, but can be how a deployment goes.

Don’t Get Mad At Them For Something The Military Has Done

Getting mad at your spouse because of something the military has done can be easy to do. Keep in mind, they have to go where the military tells them to go, where the military tells them to go. And they can’t always take you with them.

Your spouse will also have to make decisions based on their career. You might not totally understand why and this can be frustrating. Try to remember, they want to make the right choice, and they might have to say yes to things you don’t want them to.

When it comes to the decision to re-enlist or not, decisions can be complicated. In some cases, getting out of the military is a must, for the mental health of the spouse or other members of the family. In other cases, that isn’t going to work, and the career aspirations of your service member need to be taken into account. Talking through your expectations, worries, and your hopes for the future is always a smart idea.

What is your best advice about how to stay married when the military is in charge?

5 Things Military Spouses Can Do To Make Some Extra Money

July 30, 2019 by Julie

One question military spouses often have is how to make some extra money. Sometimes that military paycheck just isn’t big enough, or something the spouse is in-between careers, or unable to work a full-time job.

If you ask this question in a military spouse Facebook group you are bound to get plenty of MLM/Direct Sales ideas. While these can work for some people, I don’t want to talk about those money-making opportunities in this post.

I wanted to bring up a few ideas I have either personal experience with or have friends who have used these methods to make some money. They won’t all work for everyone. For example, you will never catch me wanting to drive for Uber. Nope. I hate driving and would not be able to do that job, but I do know about freelance writing.

So, if you are looking for ways to make some extra money, here are 5 ideas that might just work for you:

Uber/Lyft

Do you like to drive? Don’t mind taking people places? If so, you might want to check out driving for Uber or Lyft. While both companies are a rideshare service, they can be a little different in how they work.

Basically, you would apply to drive for them, some drivers do both. Then, when you are approved and up and running, you would turn the app on when you wanted to work and pick up people using the service and take them where they want to go. You would need to have a reliable vehicle and keep it clean and in good shape.

Door Dash

If you don’t mind driving but don’t want to take people places, Door Dash can be a good option. You would pick up people’s food and restaurant orders and deliver them. Some orders would already be called in and you would just pick them up and others you would need to place the order yourself. Grubhub, BitSquad, and UberEats are similar companies.

Substitute Teaching

Do you have a degree? Do you love children? Always wanted to be a teacher but don’t want to do so full-time? You might consider becoming a substitute teacher.

How much you make will depend on where you live and your educational background. Check with your local school district to see what your options are. The best part is, if you have school-age children, you would work when they are in school too.

Freelance Writing

I accepted my first freelance writing job about 7 years ago and been moving forward ever since. I love the flexibility of my job. There are so many options out there too.

Want to get started with freelance writing yourself? Your first step would be to make sure you have your own blog or website to show your own work. You want people to be able to see what you have written.

You can find jobs by pitching to websites that pay writers, finding jobs through networking, or applying for jobs on websites and jobs boards such as Problogger, All Freelance Writing, or even LinkedIn Jobs.

Babysitting

So many military spouses are looking for babysitters. Some may just want someone so they can run to the Commissary by themselves during a deployment. Others might need someone more long term.

You can also look into becoming an FCC provider through your military installation. If you go this route you will be vetted and will need to comply with the regulations. Keep in mind that if you live on a military installation you will be limited in the number of hours you can babysit without becoming an FCC provider.

Have you used anything of these methods to make extra money? What has worked for you?

Your Military Spouse Journey

July 26, 2019 by Julie

You can’t believe it is happening. Your spouse joined the Army. This is going to be their career. So many people have told you how scary military life is going to be, but all you can think about is that he is finally living his dream and that you want to be there with him as he moves forward with this career change.

You wonder about what this means for you. You wonder how about your life will change. You wonder how the next few years will be.

Your spouse gets their orders, overseas, how did we get so lucky? What will living overseas really be like? Will I enjoy living there as much as I think I will?

Finally, the day arrives, you say goodbye, you are not sure how you are going to make it through these months apart. You hope you will only be apart a month or two. So many worries going through your head.

How will you solo parent your toddler? Right now that seems impossible. How will you be both mom and dad to him? When you depended on your husband for so much ever since your son was born.

And time passes, and you think you have this military thing figured out. But deep down you know there is so much ahead for you. For both of you.

And more time passes, and he is still over there in Germany and you are still in the US waiting with your young son. And you have to wait some more, Christmas comes and goes and you are still waiting. Waiting on what? Paperwork of course.

And your birthday passes, and Easter is right around the corner. You start to feel like you might never join him. And then, you hear the news, everything has been approved and it is your time to go. The paperwork has finally be done, and you are approved to actually live with your spouse again.

After all that waiting and now all of a sudden you find yourself on an airplane, headed for your future, whatever that might be. What will it be like to be a military spouse? What will it be like to go through a deployment? So many questions go through your mind.

But then, your PCS is over, you have unpacked and are trying to find your way in a new community. You are trying to figure out where you belong. You always wanted to be a SAHM, and now, here you are.

And then the deployment orders come. You knew they would. You knew that is apart of the deal. But you are not ready, how could you be? How could you truly ever be ready to send your spouse to war?

You make friends, other military spouses who get it. You know you can get through this deployment together. You know you can handle whatever comes your way.

But you are pregnant again, and he might miss the birth. They told you they will send him back, but will they? Can a family member come out to help? Can you really give birth without your husband by your side?

And they don’t send him home in time, just three days too late. But you handle it, your mom was able to be there with you, and get your through. You conquered yet another scary thing. One of many that comes with military life.

He comes home for R&R. To be with you, your toddler and your new baby. You have an amazing time. But of course, the time flies by. Why can’t the deployment do the same?

He says goodbye, he goes back to Iraq, where he has been. Only a few more months, you can do this. You have done a few months before. One last kiss, one last hug.

And then months go by, but the end isn’t in sight like you thought it would be. Extensions are happening, the Surge, this will be a longer deployment than you first thought.

He won’t be back when you thought he would be. He will miss more birthdays. He will miss more milestones. Will your boys even remember him?

But eventually, after all this waiting, he is home, in your arms. Just in time. In time for another birthday, in time for Christmas, in time to enjoy life.

You are so thankful. He made it home. Not everyone did. You know this all too well.

And so life goes on, and you enjoy your time together. You move somewhere new, your boys get a little older, and you make new friends. And now, 365 days later, you are doing this deployment thing all again.

Saying goodbye, hoping and praying he returns. Being a solo parent. Depending on friends. Taking the deployment day by day.

And so your military life journey goes. From deployment to PCS. From making friends to saying goodbye to them. To the frustrations, to the moments you never would have had if he had never joined.

You married a soldier. A man who serves. He is willing to put on the uniform, to say goodbye to everyone he loves, to put himself in harm’s way.

And all these years later, you can’t believe what you have gone through. You can only look back and remember what you have learned. Through every deployment, every time apart.

And you hope that in the future, you can be just as strong. That you can help others get through their own military journeys through your words. That you can make a difference in the world and can be there for your boys, for your husband and everything that comes your way.

This is my military spouse journey, which may be a bit different than yours. Maybe you haven’t been through a deployment yet, maybe you have never been overseas. Maybe you kick solo parenting in the butt, and maybe solo parenting is the hardest thing you have ever had to do.

When your spouse joins the military, or when you marry them if they are already in, you are crossing over to a different type of life. You will experience things you never would have otherwise, both good and bad. You will learn from what you go through, and figure out ways to help others that come after you.

As a military spouse, you are a part of history. A part of the many men and women who have come before you and who will come after you. A part of something that can sometimes be hard to describe to other people.

While wars might look different, while times will change, one thing is always true…the military spouse life is a journey. One to love at times, one to hate at times, and one to embrace, with everything you’ve got.

5 Ways Civilians Can Help Military Spouses

July 16, 2019 by Julie

One of the things I really appreciate as a military spouse is when my civilian friends and family acknowledge what we go through, and the challenges we might have. There have been times when their help is what has gotten me through, and I can’t thank them enough.

Sometimes we can feel like no one really sees us. That no one truly understands what we go through, or even that no one really wants to try to get our lives. We can feel as if the US as a whole doesn’t quite have a clue of what is going on with the military or know how to truly support the military community.

The truth is, there are so many things that the civilian community can do to help military spouses, here are 5 of them:

Send care packages

Sending a care package to a military spouse can make their day. Whether they just moved somewhere new, or their spouse is deployed, getting a package in the mail just for them can be just what they need. During one of our deployments, a family friend sent a package with a book for me, toys and candy for my boys, and a few other fun things. Getting this in the mail put a smile on my face and I will never forget that act of kindness.

Support Organizations that truly support military families

Donate your money and time to organizations that truly support military families. Look for the ones that give to the military community on a regular basis, hold events, and work with wounded veterans and gold star families. This is a list of a few of my favorites:

Commit to hiring military spouses

If you own a business, commit to hiring military spouses. Don’t shy away from us. Military spouses have so much to offer. And sadly, the unemployment rate for military spouses is 4 times higher than the national average.

Being open to hiring military spouses is a way to show your support for the military and will help the economy. According to the Blue Star Families Social Cost Analysis of the Unemployment and Underemployment of Military Spouses study, there are costs to the economy when so many military spouses struggle with finding employment.

There are so many changes that need to be made when it comes to military spouse employed. Being open and willing to hire military spouses is a wonderful thing to do for your community and your country.

Offer to babysit

If you are local to a military spouse, you can offer to babysit. Often times, the costs of hiring a babysitter can keep a military spouse going through a deployment from hiring one, even if they really need it. Having someone they trust to watch their kids for just a few hours can give a military spouse a much-needed break.

If you are a family member, and you can make it work, try to plan a visit to help them out. Having extra hands around when you are solo parenting is so helpful. That way, the military spouse in your life can get a break, and have another adult in the home to talk with on a day to day basis, even if just for a short time.

Include them

One of the biggest frustrations can be moving to a new place and not being able to find your people. While some military installations are large and have a big military population, others are not and finding friends as a military spouse can be challenging. Befriend military spouses and include them just like you would anyone else.

Yes, it is true that military spouses tend to move around a lot, but that doesn’t mean they should be ignored. In addition to that, you might also have a national guard or reservist spouse in your community that is looking for friends. Include military spouses and help them feel welcome in your city. Doing so goes a long way in helping a military spouse feel like their new city is home for them too.

Wherever you live, and no matter how close or far you are to a military installation, there is always something you can do to help military spouses.

Who are You Rooting for in the MVC Choice Awards?

July 5, 2019 by Julie

Excited to have this guest post from PCSGrades!!!

Who are You Rooting for in the MVC Choice Awards?

I am a bit of a sucker for a contest. My competitive side just can’t stay away from entering the fray. It doesn’t matter if it is a sporting event or an awards show. I am there, front and center, rooting or voting on my favorites.

If it’s a sporting event and my favorite team isn’t playing, I’ll pick a team to root for anyway. Maybe it is the underdog team or the team that has never won the Super Bowl or the World Series. Sometimes I’m just rooting against a rival team.

I love watching the Academy Awards with friends and entering the pool for picking winners in a long list of categories. As a reporter, I used to cover the Miss America Pageant. The Reporter’s Pool for picking the winner was always a lot of fun! Miss Congeniality was always the tie-breaker!

Long Time Coming

So, when I first heard about the Military & Veteran Community Choice Awards, I was excited! But the more I learned about it, the more I realized how long overdue these awards are.

The entertainment industry has the People’s Choice Awards and now the Mil-Vet community has the MVC Choice Awards! The great thing about it is the nominees don’t come from a marketing firm. There is no senior leadership influence, no media company buys, just the opinions of those we trust the most…our fellow service members, veterans, and military spouses.

The Popular Vote!

There are plenty of awards within our community but none that come directly from us. Many times, awards are decided by a small group of panelist and unfortunately, sometimes the popular vote isn’t all that popular.

I’ve seen awards where you look at the nominees and think, “My favorite isn’t even listed.” The nice thing about the MVC Choice Awards is you can nominate any company or organization of your choice.

Another plus is the data collected through votes in the “PCS & Relocations” category will be made available on-demand, year-round, through PCSgrades for anybody researching their next PCS. This is a great help to movers gathering information and resources as they head to a new Duty Station.

MVC Choice Awards and Working Together

Full disclosure here, I’m very proud that the company I work for, PCSgrades, is one of the five “Hosting Partner” organizations which also includes: Task & Purpose, GovX, the Military Influencer Conference, and Blue Star Families.

As a military spouse, I am very grateful this group saw a need to join forces and provide a grassroots level program to recognize and celebrate those brands who provide outstanding service to our community.

Who is Your Top Choice?

So, who do you think will win the “Military Spouse or Veteran Owned Business” award? The “Social Media Influencer” is another category that I think will be super competitive. And the “Places to Live” award will also be interesting. Who hasn’t seen those informal polls on Facebook asking “What is your favorite Duty Station?” I’m guessing maybe Hawaii or Colorado Springs will top the list.

Unfortunately, the awards presentation won’t be televised, so no opportunity for a watch party. But I am looking forward the banquet where the top winners will be announced at the Military Influencer Conference in the fall.

I’ll be that person polling my table, asking “Who do you think will win?”

Carla Olivo is an award-winning career journalist and proud Military Spouse. She currently serves as the Director of Strategic Communications for PCSgrades, a review website exclusive to the Military and Veteran Community.

17 Quotes For This Fourth Of July

July 1, 2019 by Julie

It’s the 4th of July! A time to celebrate America’s freedom. A time for family and friends and BBQs and fireworks. This mid-summer celebration of our country’s birthday also can have a lot of emotion to it.

During the 4th of July, we think about our freedoms, where our country has been, and what to look towards in the future.

Here are 17 quotes all about the 4th of July and freedom:

“Great difficulties may be surmounted by patience and perseverance.”- Abigail Adams

“With freedom, books, flowers, and the moon, who could not be happy?” – Oscar Wilde

“Where liberty dwells, there is my country.” – Benjamin Franklin

“Freedom is not won on the battlefields. The chance for freedom is won there. The final battle is won or lost in our hearts and minds.” –Helen Gahagan Douglas

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams”- Eleanor Roosevelt

“Then join hand in hand, brave Americans all! By uniting we stand, by dividing we fall.” – John Dickinson

“Freedom is the open window through which pours the sunlight of the human spirit and human dignity.” – Herbert Hoover

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” – Declaration of Independence

“Our glorious diversity — our diversities of faiths and colors and creeds — that is not a threat to who we are, it makes us who we are,” –Michelle Obama

“This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave.”- Elmer Davis

“And I’m proud to be an American, where at least I know I’m free. And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me.” – Lee Greenwood

“Freedom has its life in the hearts, the actions, the spirit of men and so it must be daily earned and refreshed — else like a flower cut from its life-giving roots, it will wither and die.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower

“In the truest sense, freedom cannot be bestowed; it must be achieved.”– Franklin D. Roosevelt

“This, then, is the state of the union: free and restless, growing and full of hope. So it was in the beginning. So it shall always be, while God is willing, and we are strong enough to keep the faith.” – Lyndon B. Johnson

“Government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.” – Abraham Lincoln

“America was not built on fear. America was built on courage, on imagination and an unbeatable determination to do the job at hand.”- Harry S. Truman

“It is the love of country that has lighted and that keeps glowing the holy fire of patriotism.” – J. Horace McFarland

Get an Extra Boost this Military Spouse Appreciation Month!

June 13, 2019 by Julie

This is a sponsored post by AAFMAA!

Charlene G Wilde, Assistant Secretary of AAFMAA

As MilSpouses, our lives are truly a combination of adventure, uncertainty, service, sacrifice, and many other things in between. And let’s face it, the truth is sometimes being a military family is downright challenging. Whether it’s working to juggle your kids solo — when just surviving a trip to the grocery store can feel like climbing Mount Everest — to feeling the pressure of having to take care of the household operations while your servicemember is away, there aren’t many dull moments (or any maybe in your case!)

First off — if any of the above speaks to part of your life and experience as a MilSpouse so far, you’re not alone. I’m right there with you. With that in mind, I wanted to share an opportunity that could give you and your family an extra financial boost. Your servicemember spouse may be able to qualify for a benefit of AAFMAA Membership called the CAP Loan.

AAFMAA’s CAP Loan is an easy, smart, and affordable way to get some additional cash. It’s open to ranks E-5 to O4 and you get $5,000 at just 1.5% APR with five years to repay. The best part? There’s no credit check, no fees, no prepayment penalties, and you can use the money for whatever you need — whether it is to tackle projects around the house, take a family trip, or something just for you.

As a member of the AAFMAA team and a MilSpouse myself, I can tell you this is a great opportunity to take control and move toward the financial empowerment we all want. Your military lifestyle and your unique needs as a military family are important. You deserve the expertise and understanding of a not-for-profit organization that has been exclusively serving the military community with smart, secure financial solutions for over 140 years. Helping MilSpouses like you achieve a secure, confident financial future for your military family is our only mission.

On Military Spouse Appreciation Day and every day, at AAFMAA, we are here to help you breathe a little easier through your day-to-day life. We stand together as MilSpouses and military families, and AAFMAA is right beside us.

Interested in the CAP Loan? Learn more on our website at www.aafmaa.com/cap or call us at (800) 991-0268 with your servicemember spouse to start their application for AAFMAA’s $5,000 CAP Loan today.

How AAFMAA Can Help Military Spouses Financially

5 Military Spouse Friends You Need When You First PCS

June 12, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

When I first moved to Fort Campbell, I made friends with someone who grew up in the Clarksville area. While I didn’t go into the PCS with that goal, I just wanted to make friends, I realized how helpful that really was.

She told me about a lot of the great places to take kids, where to get a nice meal and other things about the area I might not have been able to figure out on my own, at least not for a while.

Most military spouses want to make friends when they PCS, but doing so isn’t always easy. Sometimes you can go months and months without finding anyone to connect with. That being said, if you can, look for these types of friends, because if you can find them, that will make your PCS, and your experiences at your next duty station a little bit easier.

The Friend Who Grew Up There

Finding someone who grew up in the area is such a smart idea. They can tell you about the city, where to go, where not to go, etc. They can introduce you to their friends, and help you get to know your new city, which is important. Having a local connection will also help you get to know your local civilian community.

The Friend Who Is More Outgoing Than You

One of the best things that can happen to an introverted military spouse is making friends with an extroverted military spouse. That person can be your connection to so many other people.

She will invite you on play dates, and introduce you to her neighbors. She is connected and can help you step out of your shell and get to know more people without having to do it 100% yourself.

The Friend Who Knows Post

You will also want to meet someone that knows post or base, really really well. They will know when all the kid’s activities are, they will know which CDC Hourly care center to use, and will help you get connected to some of the programs they offer, such as MOPS and PWOC.

Moving to a new installation can be so overwhelming but finding a friend that knows the place will go a long way, whether you live on or off post.

The Friend Who Has Kids The Same Age As Your Kids

If you have kids, finding friends who have kids the same age as you is such a wonderful thing. Even better when all your kids get along. You can get the kids together, while you guys hang out.

If your spouses are both deployed, have a sleepover, or even take a trip together. There are so many ways to connect when you are in the same stage of life as someone and your kids all get along.

The Friend Who Just Moved There Too

Finding friends who are also new to your duty station can be a good idea too. Why? Because you guys can learn about the place together.

There is something comforting about knowing you are not the only one who gets lost on the way to the commissary or who can’t figure out when Gate 5 is actually open.

Being a military spouse can mean moving every few years. When you move, you have to make new friends. And if you aren’t doing the moving, your friends probably are.

Here are some other blog posts about friendships and making friends during military life: