Military Life

When They Shave, It’s Time For Duty

May 2, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

This post is in partnership with Gillette’s new SkinGuard razor – new at Walmart today.

My husband and I have been married for almost 17 years now. However, for the first three years of our marriage, he was not in the military. We lived a civilian life, and he didn’t have to worry about being as clean shaven as he does now.

Being a service member means you have to stick to a few rules about facial hair, and the length of the hair on your head. As my husband is in the National Guard now, he doesn’t have to shave every day, but he often does anyway. If he has a longer period of time between drills, he might grow out his beard.

When this happens, I tend to get used to that look, but then, one day, he shaves the beard off, gets a haircut, and looks military-ready again. This can be quite emotional for me sometimes. When he shaves like that, it reminds me of his promise to the military, and what he is going to do. Most of the time this means just a weekend drill, but other times it means he is going to be gone for longer periods of time.

Gillette has come out with a brand-new razor called SkinGuard that is designed for men with sensetive skin and who often get razor bumps when they shave. This is perfect for our men in uniform, who have to maintain that close shave day after day. Anyone who shaves on a regular basis knows how frustrating and painful it can be to come away with razor burn or other issues.

This Gillette razor is perfect for my husband, and even my son who has started to shave too. Being able to shave every day without worrying about razor burn or razor bumps is a big plus, and really quite necessary for those in uniform who have to shave every single day.

The razor’s unique SkinGuard bar is positioned between the blades to minimize “tug and pull,” to cut the hair at the skin level, helping to prevent irritation. The precision trimmer on the back is great for hard-to-reach areas and styling facial hair. It is like a barbershop shave in the comfort of your own home.

Gillette’s new SkinGuard Razor is brand new and can be found at your local Walmart stores. For great results, you can also use the new PURE by Gillette shaving gel, or PURE by Gillette shaving creams which you can also find at Walmart.

What To Appreciate About Military Spouses

May 1, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

It’s May! Can you believe that? Didn’t 2019 just start? This year is flying and it will be the twenties again soon. I can’t even wrap my mind around that!

May is Military Spouse Appreciation Month. A month to recognize military spouses, and appreciate all that they do, standing by their service member.

Military spouses are not all the same, and we are all on our own military journey. Some of us are more seasoned, and have been doing this over a decade, or even over two or three. Some of us have only been doing this life for a few years, and things still feel so new.

During my time as a military spouse, there have been plenty of things I have learned to appreciate about other military spouses. There are some amazing people in this community doing such amazing things.

Military Spouse Are Creative

Military spouses use their creativity for good. They start groups and clubs when there are not any around. They send care packages overseas, with all types of themes. They take lemons and turn them into lemonade, and figure out how to get through what they need to get through, during this military life.

Military Spouses Are Patient

Military spouses have to be patient, even when we really don’t want to be. We have to wait for deployments to start, wait for deployments to end. We have to wait to PCS, and those orders can take forever.

We have to wait to go home and see our families, and we have to wait for R&R. Being patient doesn’t always come easy but we do it anyway because we have to, and we want to support our spouse in their military career.

Military Spouses Are Giving

I have seen so many military spouses give their time and even money over the years. If a military spouse loses their partner overseas, the military community is there to step up. If a military spouse needs extra support, other military spouses are there to listen to them vent. When military spouses see an issue, they work to fix that issue, because they know how doing so will benefit all of us.

Military Spouses Have So Much To Offer

From volunteering for the FRG, to going back to school to further their own careers, military spouses have so much to offer. Each of us is unique and can bring our strengths to the military community. We have so much to offer, both the military community and the civilian communities we find ourselves in.

Military Spouses Are Unique

I love listening to other military spouse’s stories. We all came to this life in our own way. Some of us married in, and some of us were with our spouses when they enlisted. We come from different places, and might even speak different languages. Some of us have children, and some of us don’t.

I love how unique the military community is. We can all come together, no matter the branch, or the MOS, and know we are all in this together. We are all supporting a service member and even if we are different in other ways, we have that in common.

As we look to May and Military Spouse Appreciation month, think about all the things you appreciate the most about your fellow military spouses. Let me know in the comments what you appreciate the most!

7 Truths About Money and Military Life

April 17, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

Having a career in the military can be a great way to provide for your family with a steady paycheck. In addition to basic pay, your service member will also receive BAH, BAS, and other special pays based on what they are doing during their military career. If they deploy, they might earn extra military pay, and when re-enlisting, they might earn a bonus.

Money can be a sticky subject but there are some things to be aware of when it comes to money and military life. Here are a few things to keep in mind whether you are new to military life or have been a military spouse for some time.

Usaa and NavyFed pay a day early

Both USAA and NavyFed will pay a day early. This can get a little confusing when the 1st or the 15th falls on the weekend or even a Monday. There always seems to be some questions about when you will actually be paid. Here is a list of 2019 USAA Paydays and 2019 NavyFed Paydays.

Raises might take time

Your spouse comes home and tells you they got a raise. You re-do the budget to reflect the raise, but then, the next time they get paid, you don’t see the extra money. Raises are not always going to happen in a timely manner. The good news is, they will receive back pay based on the date they did get the raise, once it goes into effect.

If the military screws up pay, you will have to pay it back

Is your spouse still getting extra deployment pay after they get home? Does it seem like you are getting extra BAH? If you notice anything like that, please know that eventually, the military will figure it out, even if you don’t tell them.

And when they do, they will take that money back quickly. If you or your spouse notice an issue, your service member should talk to Finance, and make sure not to spend any of that extra money or you will find yourself in trouble when the military takes it back.

Saving money is always a good idea

Savings during military life is always a good idea. You never know when you might need that extra cushion. A PCS might cost you more than you think, military pay could get messed up and your spouse might end up with a less than normal paycheck, or you might need to take an emergency trip back home.

Setting up automatic savings is easy. You can usually do so with your bank. Even if you can only save $20 extra dollars a month, that can add up. Take a look at your budget and figure out where you can start saving.

You 100% need a budget

If you don’t already have a budget, start today. Having a budget is going to help you stay on top of your money. You need to take a look at all the income you and your spouse are bringing in and where all of your money goes.

Keeping a budget will also help you stay on track at the grocery store, what you spend on fun, and for clothing and other items your family needs. USAA has free budgeting tools and Mint has some free budget templates you can use.

Moving back to the US can shock your budget

If you have been stationed overseas, and move back to the US, you can be in for some sticker shock. There are a lot of expenses that can come up when you move back to the states from overseas.

You might end up living in a hotel longer than you thought you would, and could be tempted by all the stores and restaurants you have been without during your time in another country. Be smart with that and try not to go too crazy when you first move back. You will also be losing COLA, which you might have gotten used to receiving each month so make plans to redo your budget, even before you arrive back in the states.

Use a bonus wisely

During your service member’s time in the military, they might be able to earn a bonus. If they do, you are going to want to make sure to use that bonus wisely. Think about what would be best for your family.

You can use a bonus to pay off debt, put towards a new home, take a trip, save for retirement, or pad your savings. While spending a bonus upgrading all your electronics or buying a brand new car can be tempting, make sure to make wise choices with any extra money that comes into your home.

What Military Spouses Need to Know About Military Discounts

April 5, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

I love finding military discounts. My favorite military discount is the one you can get at Disneyland. I feel like you are able to save so much money! Many different places have military discounts, from home stores to your favorite restaurants.

But…

There are some things that you should know going in where military discounts are concerned. Different businesses offer different types of discounts and knowing what they are is important.

Not all businesses offer them to spouses

One thing you should know is that not all military discounts are for military spouses, but many of them are. This can get a bit confusing. And sometimes this depends on who is giving you the discount on that day.

Usually, they will state that they only give the discount to the service member in the fine print. Typically, free meals on veterans day are only for the veteran. If you present your dependent ID and they let you know that the discount is only for the service member or veteran, be polite with your response.

Not all businesses offer them to the national guard and the reserves

This can get a little frustrating. Not all businesses give a military discount to the national guard or the reserves. However, in my own experience, most of them do. Again, this is where you want to check the fine print.

I would encourage any business giving a military discount to include the national guard and the reserves too. This part of the military often gets overlooked, even though they are also putting on the uniform, deploying, and spending time away from their families. While I understand sometimes they can’t extend the discount to that many people, adding this part of the military would be a nice idea.

You might not be able to use them on everything

In most cases, there is something you won’t be able to use the military discount on. Usually, buying a gift card, or certain products. Make sure to double check if you are not sure. Sometimes, you can find out this information on their website or where they have the military discount posted.

You might be able to combine the military discount with another promotion

One reason you might not be able to use a discount is if you have a store coupon or if you want to use the discount for something that is on sale or clearance. However, there are some places that will allow you to do so. For example, at Rack Room Shoes, they offer a 10% military discount that you can use with BOGO 50% off deals, sales prices, other coupons, and promotional offers.

You should check your options when you do have to decide to see what can get you a better deal. While 10% can be nice, a business might have a coupon that is for 20% off that would be a better deal. With the Southwest Airlines Military Rate, you can often find a better deal with their Wanna Get Away specials available to everyone.

Not all locations have the same discount

Another thing about military discounts to keep in mind is that different locations for the exact same business might offer something different. For example, here in the Fort Campbell area, Cracker Barrel does offer a military discount but it isn’t that way everywhere. When I lived in Lexington, they offered one at their Chick-Fil-A but the ones here in Clarksville don’t.

In some cases, it is hard to get a clear answer on what their discount is because they often are up to the management of that specific location. Asking is your best bet, because they know what they are going to do at your local location.

Sometimes the military discount isn’t advertised

While some businesses display that “10% off for service members” sign, others do not. Some places don’t even talk about the discount on their websites.

When in doubt, ask. That might be the only way to find out. And remember, just because the military discount isn’t listed, it doesn’t mean they don’t have one.

Where is your favorite place to get a military discount?

The Joys of the Modern Military Spouse Life

March 21, 2019 by Julie 1 Comment

We now have Walmart Grocery Delivery. I am so excited! Not only for myself but for all the parents with small children, going through a deployment, who loathe having to take their kids to the grocery store with them.

I have been there so many times. Put the baby in my baby carrier, put a toddler in the cart, hoping they won’t open anything, and make your older child walk beside you. Going to a grocery store with all your kids is a big chore. And it isn’t very fun.

But, thanks to modern life, you no longer have to if you don’t want to. Your spouse can be deployed for a year and you might never have to attempt the grocery store with kids the whole time they are gone.

This got me thinking, what else is different about being a military spouse today, versus in the past? What else has changed to make life a little easier for us? What should we celebrate, even in the midst of hard deployment days?

Communication

Communication has changed so much. Way back in World War II, the only way my grandparents communicated with each other was through letters on paper, sent across the ocean in the mail, only to be delivered weeks later. I have some of these letters and they really are so sweet to read, but just imagining that those letters were it, as far as communication went, is hard to wrap my mind around.

We can get frustrated when we can’t talk to our spouse all the time, but at least we can talk to them, on the phone, in real time. Or we can video chat. Or even send an email.

Even during my time as a military spouse things have changed. During our first two deployments, if my husband called, he called our house phone and would have to leave a message if I wasn’t home. These days, I basically carry him in my pocket if he is away from home.

And amazing as all this communication is, I think when we can’t communicate this way, we can get even more frustrated. We expect to talk every day, text every day, communicate every day, and when we can’t, that can be frustrating.

Try to remember how things used to be and how far we have come, even if you are going a few days without talking to your spouse.

Social Media

Back in the day, you made friends in person. Only in person. If you moved somewhere new, you couldn’t join a community ahead of time online. There was no online.

When I was 16 years old, my dad came home with a free trial of CompuServe. This was my very first experience with the internet. Of being on a computer, and connecting with other, real people, in other parts of the country, and even the world. My mind was blown.

These days, I carry that technology in my pocket. I am closer to some friends I met online than to some of my family members, simply because of social media. If a friend moves away, we can still easily keep in touch, and I talk over text with my best friend all day long.

Social media has really changed everything and there is no turning back. And while there are some issues with social media in general, social media can help me make friends, stay connected with the people I care about and learn more about any subject I am interested in.

Social media is life changing, and for us military spouses, a way to really connect with others, in ways we otherwise might not be able to.

Military Spouse Culture

Military spouse culture has also changed over the years. You no longer have to be a stay at home mom, just because your spouse joined the military. You no longer have to fit in a specific box.

You can figure out ways to work on your own career while your spouse is working on theirs. While there is still so much that can be done, military spouse employment can still be a huge issue, we have come a long way.

In addition to the military spouse employment issues, military spouses are more diverse than they have ever been before. We don’t all fit into the same mold. Not every military spouse is a woman and not every military spouse is married to a man. There is no one way to be a military spouse, all that is required is to love a service member.

We can be nostalgic about the past, sometimes those years can seem so romantic or easier than our modern life, but there is something to the way technology has changed, and the way people are treated, that makes me excited to be a military spouse in today’s world.

Even in the 13 years I have been a military spouse, things have changed. Through the little things, my life has become a little bit easier. And that is something to be excited about.

What is your most favorite modern convenience when it comes to your military spouse life?

6 Things You Should Remember When You Are Struggling With Military Life

March 13, 2019 by Julie 1 Comment

Sometimes, when my husband is gone, or even if he is home, the stress overwhelms me. I find myself in a place I don’t want to be in. There is too much going on, too much to think about, and my emotions are all over the place. I end up in a bit of a funk and feel like I am on the struggle bus.

But…

In those times, there are things I have to tell myself, things I have to remind myself of, and doing so puts me in a much better place. If you have ever felt like you are struggling with military life, you know what I am talking about.

You know that you can’t snap your fingers and have a deployment go away. You know you married a military service member and with that comes military life. But what you really want is to get to a better emotional place.

Here are six things to remember when you are struggling with military life:

Everything changes

No matter what you are going through, remember everything changes. Whether you are going through a deployment, waiting on a PCS, or just struggling through something, things will change, as they always do.

Change can be difficult, you might not want to move, you might not want the deployment to start, but change happens and we just have to go with it, knowing that eventually, things will get to a better place.

Some days I might be feeling down because I simply can’t make a decision on something important. I hate that. But I have to remind myself that time can make things a little more clear. And if it isn’t something I have to decide ASAP, I can give myself time to figure it out.

You have been through hard stuff before

Here’s the deal. You have been through hard stuff before. You have. Maybe you haven’t ever been through a deployment before, maybe this is the first time you have ever moved, but life in general can bring difficult situations, and you have been able to get through those in the past.

Maybe it was messy. Maybe you felt defeated. But you got through to the other side. Remember that.

You will grow through this

We always grow through our struggles, even if we can’t see that at the time. Journaling during your struggles can help, talking with a good trustworthy friend can help, and thinking about how you have changed for the better through it all can help.

And as you grow as a person, you can help others too. You might find yourself in a situation in the future where you can be there for someone going through what you are going through right now. We as humans can help one another out, simply because we have been there before.

Don’t take on other’s stress

One thing you don’t want to do is take on someone else’s stress. People do stress about all types of things and it can be easy to feel overwhelmed by all of that, epecually when you see it all the time on social media.

Try not to take on other people’s stress and focus on what you need to focus on. Think about what is best for you and your family. Don’t worry about things that don’t have to do with your current situation and you will be better for it.

Don’t forget to breathe

I know, easier said than done. But give yourself time to breathe. We say it is best to stay busy during a deployment, and it is. But if you are too busy, you could end up stressing yourself out even more.

Try to find that balance and give yourself a break. If you feel like you are doing too much, you migjt be. It’s okay to take a step back and breathe. You don’t have to say yes to everything. And if being too busy is the reason for your stress, take a step back to find some peace.

Count your blessings

Sometimes we really just have to take a step back and count our blessings. Living without your spouse for months at a time is not an easy thing to do. Having to say goodbye to friends and family all the time can be heartbreaking. Military life isn’t an easy life, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be thankful for the great things that are true about our lives.

Thinking about what we do have can help. Yes, your husband might be deployed for six months, but he does love and care about you and your kids. Yes, you do have to move again but now you have a new state to explore. Yes, military life brings on a lot of stress but you have meet some amazing people to walk through this life with.

There will probably come a time when you do struggle with military life. Things are not adding up the way you want them to. You are feeling frustrated because you can do what you are wanting to do.

And that’s hard.

But, if you are married to a service member, you can’t easily just walk away from military life, and so you need to figure out how to get through these feelings and get to a better place emotionally. And once you find ways to do that, military life will seem a little more manageable and you will feel like you can get through so much of what this life brings.

What do you do when you feel like you are struggling with military life???

When Your Spouse Has CQ, In GIFs

March 12, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

They come home from work, you are super excited about the upcoming weekend. You can’t wait for some family time, a break from the kids, and time with your spouse.

Only…when they get home, they let you know, they have CQ this next weekend.

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Crap, now you will be spending a lot of the weekend without them, and they will be stuck at the CQ desk for 24 hours.

CQ is a thing some service members have to do and it isn’t very fun. CQ stands for “Change of Quarters” and is 24-hour duty, where they will have to sit at a desk, to monitor the barracks. They might have to clean, or do other duties, but they have to stay there the whole time.

And while you would think 24 hours away would be a piece of cake for those of us who have gone through a long deployment, CQ never seems to be at the right time. And thus, becomes an annoying part of living this military life.

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When you first hear the news that your spouse has CQ, you might be pretty chill about it. It’s just CQ after all. But then you remember your 5-month-old isn’t sleeping well right now and you could use the extra support during the night.

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You decide you are going to bring him lunch because, well you want to be nice like that. So you grab your kids, head to the car, only to realize you left his lunch on the counter. New plan, stop at Subway and get him a big old sandwhich, he will love that anyway.

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The day goes on, and you almost forget he isn’t coming home tonight. But you remember when the clock hits 6 pm and he still isn’t home. It’s been a long day and you are ready to relax.

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But you soon accept they won’t be around for the night and try to think about all the fun you and your kids will have. You ordered pizza, you have a fun movie for the kids, and oh, will have to do bedtime all by yourself. Yikes.

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You soon accept that fact too and get through it because you are quite the milspouse boss and you can conquer bedtime all by yourself. You have done it 100 other times, and CQ shouldn’t be any harder than any other time they have been gone overnight.

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So you put the kids to bed and you then realize the beauty of CQ, you get the remote all to yourself. You can watch the Bachelor and Real Housewives, without any commentary. And then you roll your eyes when the housewives complain that they can’t go anywhere without their husbands. You don’t know that life!

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You put yourself to bed, knowing that you have almost conquered CQ. And you are so thankful that THIS CQ is better than the last time he had it, over New Year’s. And you had to celebrate with a whole bottle of sparkling grape juice all by yourself.

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And then you get yourself in bed, hope and pray your baby doesn’t wake up, and try to get some rest. Because tomorrow, CQ will be over and things will be back to normal. Well, as normal as military life can be. As long as he gets enough sleep and can catch up on the lost hours, you still might be able to enjoy a few hours of the weekend together.

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Do you have any special things you do when your spouse is working CQ?

7 Tips to Enjoy Your First FRG Meeting

March 7, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

Yes, FRG meetings. Some people love them, some people hate them. But either way, FRG meetings are such a good thing to have, even if they have issues being implemented. Even if certain FRGs are not working as well as they could be.

FRG stands for “Family Readiness Group” and you can find them in the Army, the Army Reserves, and the Army National Guard. The Navy also calls them the FRG. The Air Force has their Key Spouse Program, the Marine Corps has their Family Readiness Program, and the Coast Guard has their Work-Life Program which all try to accomplish the same thing.

The FRG is there to inform spouses as well as help support them, especially during deployments.

I have been a part of a few different FRG groups, and each one was a little different. My FRGs in Germany felt more like a real community of spouses, working together to get through our deployments or other struggles. In the states, things felt a little different but underneath it all, there was still support in these groups.

I do believe that going to at least one FRG meeting at your new duty station, is a good thing to do. If nothing else, to see how things are going to go. Maybe the FRG meeting won’t be as bad as you think it will be. Maybe there won’t be a lot of drama. Maybe there will be support there that you are yearning for.

As you figure out when and where the FRG meets, and get ready for your first FRG meeting, here are some tips to keep in mind:

Other people are going to be just as nervous as you are

If you are an intrvert, or even if you are not, you might be a bit nervous about going to your first FRG meeting. This is normal. Most people are going to be nervous doing this.

There will be new people to meet, there will be new information to learn, and that can feel so intimidating. Just remember, other people are feeling the same way, and might just be looking for a friendly face, just like you are.

The FRG is supported by volunteers

One thing to keep in mind is that the FRG is going to be supported by volunteers. People who have taken time out of their schedules to help, in many different ways. Giving them a little bit of grace is important.

In some cases, a spouse was “voluntold” to become a leader or take on another position. They might feel like they had to say yes, and might not have wanted to take on the position in the first place. This can make things tricky, and can be an big issue in the military spouse world.

You could become one of them

You could volunteer too. You don’t have to step up to be the FRG leader. There are many other ways to do so.

The FRG includes positions such as Liasion, Assistant Leader, Secretary, Treasurer, Newsletter Ediotr, Activties Chairperson, Fundraiser Chairperson, and Advisor. You can also offer to help in smaller ways such as sending birthday cards to the single service members in the unit, or making food on a regular basis for events.

When you get to your first FRG meeting, they might let you know what positions are available or tell you how you can help. If not, you can always ask where you might be needed. Volunteering through your FRG can be a great way to get to know people a little better and become a part of something that can help a lot of military spouses.

Drama doesn’t have to rule everything

One of the biggest complaints about FRGs is the drama. And I am not going to lie, there can be some serious drama. And that drama can get nasty. But it doesn’t have to be that way forevery FRG group.

You can go into your meetings knowing you don’t want to be a part of that. Treating people with respect and responding to situations in a mature manner can go such a long way in controlling the drama. Don’t let the fear of drama keep you away from FRGs alltoegther.

Grace for other people goes a long way

The FRG is made up on humans, and humans can make mistakes sometimes. Your leader might feel at bit overwhelmed at times, or there could be positions that just haven’t been filled yet. When you go to attend your first FRG meeting, seeing the potential instead of just bashing what is, can be important.

Grace for others can go a long way, and can change things for the better. Try to do what you can to be kind to others within the FRG and work towards postive changes. FRGs can be really amazing places if everyone is working together to make them so.

Support is always important

The support military spouses can receive through the FRG is so important, especially during deployments. These spouses are the ones who understand what you are going through because they are going the same thing you are. Most likely, your spouses will be leaving together, will be deployed together, and coming home together.

While you are probably not going to hit it off with everyone in your FRG, your FRG can be a good place to find some understanding friends. This might not happen right away, but the potential is always there. So please remember that as you attend your first FRG meeting.

The FRG won’t fix all of your problems

In the end, the FRG won’t solve all of your problems. The FRG isn’t set up for that. The FRG can’t make your spouse come home any sooner, the FRG can’t raise your children for you, and it can’t take away all of your struggles.

The FRG can help with your lonliness, can help you stay busy, and can give you tools to make it through your deployment, or anything else military life might throw at you.

Have you ever had a good FRG experience? What do you think the key to that was?

The Six Degrees of Separation of Military Spouse Friendships

March 5, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

A friend and I were talking the other day about how we had met through a mutual friend, and how there really does seem to be six degrees of separation of military spouse friendships within the military community. When you meet someone new, they might also know someone you know.

There have been so many times when this has happened to me. I meet someone new, we add each other on Facebook, and I learn that they are friends with someone I already know.

A friend from Germany might be stationed near a friend I met through blogging.

A former neighbor of mine might end up becoming a new neighbor of someone else I have met during my time as a military spouse.

I can meet someone who just moved here, and it turns out they are good friends with a girl I knew from MOPS, who moved away from here years ago.

They say the military is a small world, and each branch is even smaller. Add online connections and a lot of us military spouses know one another, or know each others friends. And this…can be a good thing.

Knowing that someone has a mutual friend can allow us to be a little bolder in pursuing a new friendship. If a friend of ours gets along with them, we might get along with them too. And that can help all of us when it comes to making new friends.

As military spouses, we don’t all have the luxury of staying in the same place for most of our military life years. Either we are moving, or our friends are, or both. As you think about your current circle of friends, you know that three years from now, things are not going to look the same. They might not even be the same a year from now.

As much as we know this is all apart of military spouse life, saying goodbye to a good friend is never going to be easy. In some cases, saying goodbye to a good friend is going to break our hearts, and no amount of preparing for that will help.

I am thankful that we do live in a time of social media, despite its downfalls. Not only can I keep in touch with my family, but I can stay in the lives of the many friends I have made during my time as a military spouse.

Things won’t be the same after you say goodbye to someone. That is life. Even if you can see another again, and I hope that you are able to, life just goes on and things change.

My best friend in Germany and I haven’t seen one another for 9 years. We have both added another child neither one of us have ever met. I don’t doubt that we would have a good time if we saw each other again, but it wouldn’t be the same as it was back in 2010 when we said goodbye.

I am thankful we are able to keep in touch. To see how our children are doing, to connect and hear about each other’s lives, to still be apart of them, even in such a different way than it was before.

As much as I want to stop time when it comes to my friendships, I know that isn’t possible. I mourn the time we no longer spend together, and I cherish every memory we have ever had. Still, I know that the best thing I can do is move forward and be open to new friendships, whereever they might be.

And knowing that so many of the people I meet today have some sort of connection to someone I already know is comforting. That allows this introvert to open up a little more, and learn more about the new people I meet in my life.

If you are a new military spouse, you might be thinking that this couldn’t possibly happen to you. That everyone you meet is completly new to you and you have no connection to them in any way. But give it time.

As the years go on, you will meet more people. And as you PCS from one place to the next, your social network will grow. You will find your military world a little friendly, a little more comfortable, and a bit easier to navigate.

Have you ever made a friend simply because they were connected to someone you already know? Tell me your story!

9 Things You Wish Were True About Military Life

February 18, 2019 by Julie Leave a Comment

Military life can be a crazy ride. From deployments to PCSing every few years, this life isn’t without its struggles. Some days we wish we had a magic wand to make everything a little easier.

So let’s have some fun…here are 9 things you wish were true about military life:

That every deployment came with a nanny

Let’s face it, us military spouses can get burned out really quickly when it comes to solo parenting. What if every military family received a nanny with deployment orders? That would make life so much easier!

That you could use a “Get out of deployment free” card

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could get out of a deployment because it wasn’t the right time, or your kids were too young, or because you just didn’t think you could handle another deployment with everything going on? The reality is, there is never a good time for a deployment but we plow through anyway.

That you could PCS somewhere simply because your BFF did

Wouldn’t that be amazing? Your BFF went to Fort Carson, that means you get to go there too. How fun would that be?

That ALL military housing was nice, safe, and you wanted to live in it

Unfortunately not all military housing is created equal. And sometimes housing can make people sick. Wouldn’t it be nice if all military housing were up to code, was nice and safe, and allowed everyone who lived there to have a good home they enjoyed living in?

That your spouse could get leave when they needed to, and planning family vacations would be easier

Have you ever had to change the dates of a trip because of the Army? We sure have. If only leave dates could be taken at the perfect time, and could never be changed.

That every FRG meeting would be filled with information you need to know with zero drama

Some FRGs are amazing but a lot of them get a bad rap, and maybe for good reason. Wouldn’t it be nice if the FRG was always a fun place to go, with lots of great information, and without any drama? Maybe us military spouses do have the power to change the FRG into a good and helpful place for military spouses to go 🙂

That you could always shop at the Commissary on payday without the crowds

What if you never had to wait more than a few minutes, even if you do go to the Commissary on payday? That would be nice!

That it would be easy to make friends no matter where you go

Making friends during military life can be a little bit frustrating sometimes. Yes, you have to get out there but sometimes that isn’t enough. What if making friends was easy, no matter who you are, and where your PCS to?

That all the challenges when it comes to military spouse employment would go away

There are so many spouses that have to put their career on hold or had to pursue something different because they are married to someone in the military. What if these challenges could go away? What if things were a little bit easier when it comes to a military spouse and their own career?

This list can be a lot of fun, and hopefully made you laugh a little but the reality is, there are things you can do to change and make military life a little better for your family and others.

Be kind. Make friends. Work for changes. And don’t be afraid to figure out a way to make things a little better for everyone.

What about you? What would you want to change if you had the power to do so?

Military Life

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