No, The Military Isn’t The Same As Any Other Job

11 months. That’s how long I have gone without seeing my husband because of his job as an Infantry soldier.

15 months. That’s the longest he has lived away from us because of his job as an Infantry soldier.

5 months. That was the length of his shortest deployment because of his job as an Infantry soldier.

When someone joins the military, everything changes. Their families have to adapt to their new career path. When someone joins the military, what used to apply doesn’t anymore, and there is a huge learning curve.

No, the military isn’t the same as any other job.

While there are other career paths that take someone away from their families, and while those jobs can have their own struggles, being in the military is a unique career path, unlike any other.

As a military spouse, we have to change our mindset when our spouse joins the military. We have to understand how important their job is. We have to understand that their job will come first, even in cases where the job wouldn’t if they were working a different type of job.

As a military spouse, we are not guaranteed that our husband will be there for the birth of every child. Most commands do try to make it happen, but at the end of the day, the mission comes first.

As a military spouse, we move when they get new orders. We might leave our friends, we might leave our jobs, we might leave the only home we have ever really known.

As a military spouse, we have to take the backseat. It doesn’t matter if our child is graduating from high school or our brother is getting married, the mission comes first.

Over the years, you will get used to some of this, and at the same time, still, get frustrated by it. You might need to vent to a friend when you find out your husband is deploying three months before your planned trip to Walt Disney World. You might get angry when you have to reschedule your anniversary trip for the fourth time because of a training schedule. You might break down in tears when you find out that your spouse will miss your son’s first birthday, just like he missed the 1st birthdays of your other three children.

No, the military isn’t the same as any other job.

There are rules, regulations, and ways of doing things that don’t always make logical sense. You will have trouble making plans because things change all the time.

Your children will have to say goodbye to one of the parents more often than other kids. They will listen to their mom or dad read them bedtime stories on a video. They will work with you to send care packages to far away lands that most have only heard about on the news.

We create support groups both locally and online to help us spouses through the stresses of this life. From moving to deployments to general military life frustrations. We find friends to help us through, friends who become family.

No, the military isn’t the same as any other job.

Serving in the military is a sacrifice. Doing so is giving up freedoms that other Americans don’t for the sake of our country. Being a military spouse is supporting those who serve in a very personal way. But because we do, our lives are changed forever.

And through the struggles we endure, we became stronger. Us seasoned spouses can reach out to the new spouse and help them through what they are dealing with. We can figure out ways to endure through our more challenging days. We work hard to be strong, even if we don’t always feel like we are.

At the end of the day, we look at our service member and know how important their job is. Whether they are deploying to Iraq or going down to Florida to help with hurricane relief. Whether they are preparing to train all summer long or moving with your family from your hometown in Ohio to a new home in South Korea. Whether they serve five years or retire after 30.

No, the military isn’t the same as any other job.

How long has your service member been in the military?