Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

9/11

When The Towers Fell

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When The Towers Fell

We didn’t know what that day would bring. Tuesday, September 11th, 2001, started out with clear skies and so much promise.

Kids off to school.

Mom and dad off to work.

People getting to their jobs, some running late, some arriving early.

As the morning began, we had no idea what was planned. We had no idea others wanted to hurt us. We had no idea the world was about to change.

When The Towers Fell

At 8:30 that morning, some wondered what they would have for lunch that day, or maybe if they would be late picking up the kids from school. Some may have thought about their birthday party the weekend before, or what movie they would go to see the next. A new military wife was just getting used to the new PX, and how the Commissary worked, she wasn’t thinking too much of her husband going to war.

Then at 8:45 am…that all changed as the first plane flew into the World Trade Center.

And a little after 9:00 am, we knew, this wasn’t some random accident when the second plane hit. Someone was doing this. Someone was attacking us and life would be forever changed.

At 9:45 am, a plane flew into the Pentagon. For so many of us, this was surreal. Something we had only seen in disaster movies. Something that didn’t really happen in real life.

And then the towers fell, first the south tower, then the north tower, we could not believe this was happening. We could not believe what we were watching.

As the moments went by, we were glued to our television sets. A college student, wondering what this meant for the US, for the World. A young mom, rocking her baby girl, wondering what this meant for her future. A military wife, knowing in her heart that this was the start of something that would change the military forever.

And as we waited and wondered and prayed…

As we hoped and cried and reached out...

As we listened to our leaders try to explain what was going on…

We tried to make sense of all of this. We tried to make sense of what we were watching. We tried to understand what going on but all we saw was a tragedy. One we never would have expected.

When The Towers Fell

Almost 3,000 people lost their lives that day, right here in America. The unthinkable was a reality. A new threat that we still have today. Terrorism wasn’t so front and center like it is now.

Before 9/11, we knew terrorism existed. We knew what terrorism was, but not on this level. Not right here in front of us.

In the days and weeks after 9/11, America came together in a way I had never seen before and haven’t seen since. I remember gathering at a local church, packed with people, to pay our respects, to mourn together, to not go through this alone.

We all felt like family. We were all in this together. We had to be, that was the only way we could get through it.

And now, all these years later, we still think of those who lost their lives on that day, and the days after. From the first responders to those who serve in the military.

We think of their loved ones, those who mourn on a personal level. Those who never thought that saying goodbye that morning would be the last time. And for those who never 100% knew what happened to their family members.

When The Towers Fell

We think of the gold star spouses, and family members, fighting the war on terror. We think of those who are still getting deployed, and who are still fighting for our freedom, against those who want to hurt us.

We can’t forget those who went into the rubble, to help find survivors. Those that were a caring heart in a sea of craziness. Those who worked tirelessly to help those in need.

“What separates us from the animals, what separates us from the chaos, is our ability to mourn people we’ve never met.” – Author David Levithan

As we head into this 18th anniversary of this tragedy, I will say a prayer for those who are still missing their loved ones. For those who were shaken by what happened in a very personal way. For those who were too young to remember, but still feel the effects.

I will say a prayer for our military, those who have deployed and those who will. For their families, and those that love them. For the future and the hope that this enemy can be defeated someday.

And while the years will pass, and time will go on, I hope we never forget the spirit and the love that was shown in our time of tragedy, as our country came together, and as we tried to make sense of everything that happened on that September day. I know I never will.

18 Years Since Everything Changed

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18 Years Since Everything Changed

18 years have passed since the day the towers fell.

When people came together, and we stood together as a country. When we realized that loving our neighbor was more important than any debates we may have had in the past. When we couldn’t figure out why people hated the US so much that they would take so many lives on that one fall day.

On September 11th, the military changed…

There is a pre-9/11 military experience and a post 9/11 one. So many have joined the military because of what happened that day. Going to war changed because of that day.

The US went to war less than 18 months after the attack. A war my husband and a lot of your spouses have also fought in. A war that some think should never have happened. A war that might have been the best way to handle a situation we have never had to handle as a country before.

We can’t forget that we are still going to war and service members are still deploying.

We are still fighting the war on terrorism, no matter who says that it is over on the nightly news. Spouses are still saying goodbye to their loved ones, heading over to Iraq, Afghanistan, and anywhere they are told to go. And we, as American citizens, need to remember that.

On September 11th, traveling changed…

Going to the airport is a different experience in our post 9/11 world. Before 9/11, you could go through security to say goodbye to your family members, regardless of if you had a ticket or not. You could greet your loved ones right when they got off the plane. I have so many memories of doing this with my own grandparents.

We have to take our shoes off and we have to be careful about what liquids we bring. People pack differently because of that day. Every time I get on an airplane, I am reminded about what happened.

I think about American Airlines Flight 11, United Airlines Flight 175, American Airlines Flight 77 and United Airlines Flight 93. About how those people got on their flights, without knowing what could happen. About how now we know, that what happened is a possibility.

As a military spouse, I know what military families have had to give up in the war against terrorism.

We understand how serious terrorism can be and why our spouses have to serve in certain parts of the world. However, emotionally saying goodbye to them can be so difficult, especially since our country has been at war for so long.

18 Years…

I still remember 9/11 like it was just a couple of months ago. I had just started my last semester of college. Being on the west coast, I woke up to the news. I got ready for classes and drove the 20 minutes to my school.

Back in 2001, the internet was something you used on your computer. We did not get the news as quickly as we do today. Because of that, not everyone in my first class had heard the news. Those that had told them.

We talked about what happened. We talked about possible war and what that would mean. All of it seemed so surreal. It still seems surreal.

Time has moved on…

In 2002, I got married and had three children. They were born after this tragedy. Anyone under the age of 18 was not born yet, most of the current college-aged adults were too young even to remember. Our country has moved on in some ways and in other ways we have not.

The threats are still real. The military is still fighting, and we can’t ever forget those who died on that day. Their stories, their families, and the strength that each one of them showed.

You might be too young to remember, maybe you were just a child and all you know about that day was that your parents watched the news instead of letting you watch cartoons.

Maybe you were like me, in college, getting ready to start your adult life, going out into the world so different than the one you started your college years in.

Maybe you were a young military bride, whose husband just joined the Army, assuming a peacetime enlistment.

Maybe you were pregnant with your first child when your husband who had been debating enlisting decided that now was the time.

I pray that as time moves on, the world becomes a safer place. That the evil that comes from these types of attacks can be stopped. That we will never forget that tragic day in September…one that changed us forever.

Do you remember 9/11? What were you doing the morning of 9/11?

What Can I Say About September 11th That Hasn’t Been Said Before

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What Can I Say About September 11th That Hasn’t Been Said Before?

Every September, as we get closer to the middle of the month, the memories of what happened on September 11th, 2001 come flooding back. I can’t help but think about that entire morning, at least how I experienced it, from the West Coast.

I still remember when I realized something not so normal was going on. I still remember going to class, and how not everyone in the room had heard the news. I still remember how that was all we talked about for the next two weeks of classes, how could we talk about anything else?

I was only dating my husband at the time, and he was in the IRR (The Individual Ready Reserve,) not active duty or even in the National Guard. IRR at that time didn’t mean a whole lot, just going in for appointments every once in a while. It was more of a technicality.

What Can I Say About September 11th That Hasn't Been Said Before

After September 11th, things changed.

I started to wonder if he would be called up and what that would mean. What that would mean for him, for our relationship. Would we rush to get married? Would be break up? I didn’t know.

As the months passed, it seemed clear that he probably wouldn’t be called up after all. Then time passed.

I had no idea that what happened on 9/11 would change our country, our military, our family.

What Can I Say About September 11th That Hasn't Been Said Before

So as I think about what to write this year, I am not sure what else I could say.

I could give you more details about that day, I know some of you were too young to remember.

I could tell you about my kids and what they know about that day, the kids that were born after 9/11.

I could tell you about how different my military spouse experience has been because of what happened that day, what the war on terror meant on a personal level being married to a service member, or about any fears I still have about having to say goodbye to a spouse as they go fight in this new type of war.

I could leave you with some inspiring words about the sacrifices made.

The men and women who lost their lives in the tower, the ones who did in the recovery efforts, or those who did in the following years in Iraq and Afghanistan because of what happened that day.

I could give you a list of movies and television shows and books that talk about 9/11 or have something to do with that day.

But haven’t we all heard this all before? Is any of it new? Is it even worth repeating?

What can I say about September 11th that hasn’t been said before?

What Can I Say About September 11th That Hasn't Been Said Before

What words can I give that will help you through this day? What can I add to the conversation?

I just don’t know.

I do know that we can’t forget what we as a country have been through.

We can’t forget that morning or what happened that day.
 
We have to keep sharing with those that were not there.

I do know that our lives were changed in the smallest and biggest of ways that day.

I do know that in the aftermath of 9/11, communities came together like never before.

It didn’t matter if you didn’t agree on 9/10, on 9/11 you were holding hands in a sanctuary, trying to make sense of everything.

You might have two years old, sitting on your mother’s lap as she had CNN on all day.

You might have been seven years old, wondering what was going on and why so many people were so upset.

 

You might have been twenty years old, sitting in a college class, worrying about your friend who lives in NYC.

You might have been thirty years old, a proud military wife for the last ten years, wonder how this will change everything for you and your family.

What Can I Say About September 11th That Hasn't Been Said Before

Whatever you were doing that day, whatever you remember, if nothing else, 9/11 is a memorial day. One in which we can remember those who have lost their lives, lost their families, or even lost their hope.

Here we are, on the 17th anniversary of the day that changed everything, let’s try to show as much peace, love, and hope to others as we can. For that is quite the opposite of what led to that tragedy almost twenty years ago. And that is what will keep us moving forward as a country, despite the struggles and frustrations we face along the way.

Peace. Love. Remember. 

To My Children Born After 9/11

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To My Children Born After 9/11

To My Children Born After 9/11

On 9/11, I was in college. I didn’t become a mom until a few years later. Anyone who remembers 9/11 is probably at least 19 years old. The other day, I was taking my boys to Wendy’s for some frostys, and I started talking to them about 9/11 and how everything changed.

That got me thinking about what we can tell our children, the ones that don’t remember the world before everything changed. The ones for whom the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are the norm. The ones for whom terrorism has always been a known threat.

When I was in 1st grade, the Challenger exploded on live TV. I will remember that forever. When my parents were just becoming adults, Kennedy was shot. And those in college today might just remember their parents glued to the TV in September of 2001.

When you are a child, and a tragedy happens, you are usually aware that something is going on out of the norm. You might not even remember all the details of that day, but the event sticks with you. You rely on older generations to let you know what happened and what the tragedy meant.

As far as 9/11 is concerned, this is something that happened before my children were born. To them September 11th wasn’t something they lived through, it was something they were told about. 9/11 is something they can look up in their history books and listen to stories from those who were there.

These children, these teenagers, these kids, they don’t know the world in which something like 9/11 didn’t even seem possible. On September 10, 2001, so many of us went to bed expecting the next day to be a typical September day. 9/11 was the phone number you called when you had an emergency; it wasn’t an emergency on its own.

For those in the military, 9/11 changed the directions of their careers. I can’t imagine what my military spouse life would have looked like had 9/11 never happened. If service members had never gone to Iraq or Afghanistan. If there had never been a surge or deployment extensions.

The wars my husband has been in have changed him, changed us, and changed our whole lives. I tried to explain this to my boys. That their Dad, he is a big part of what happened after 9/11. That if that day hadn’t happened, their lives would look very different.

I explained to them that the way to board an aircraft is different. When I was in college, my parents would wait for me at the gate when I flew home for visits. This is such a small change, but I can’t help remembering how things used to be. From having to take your shoes off to being careful about which liquids you bring, flying will never be the same again.

To My Children Born After 9/11

But for my kids? This is the way things are. This is the way they have always been for them. They don’t remember a time before all of this.

So when I talk to my children about 9/11, I want them to know that something we didn’t think would happen did. That we realized the horror that others could commit. That we had to make plans as a country to work towards keeping everyone safe and making sure what happened in New York City, never happened again.

I hope that I can take my boys to NYC someday. I have never been myself, but when we go, I would want them to see the 9/11 memorial. I would want to share more about that day. I want them to learn about the first responders and the heroes that emerged after it happened. I want them to know that history is important and what we learn from the past is what will help us move forward in the future.

How do you talk to your kids that were not yet born when 9/11 happened?