Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Deployment

How To Have a Date Night When Your Spouse is Deployed…in GIFs

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How To Have a Date Night When Your Spouse is Deployed...in GIFs

Your spouse is deployed, but you want to try to plan a date night anyway. This could work you think, even though you are 6,000 miles apart. You need that time with your spouse, and setting up a “date night” over video chat is the best way to do it.

Here is how to have a date night when your spouse is deployed…in GIFs:

Step One: Figure out when they will be able to talk and when you can talk at the same time, for longer than 5 minutes.

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Step Two: Put the date and time in your calendar, knowing it might change.

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Step Three: Put the kids to bed early that night, hopefully, they won’t give you any trouble. Being a solo parent is hard work!

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Step Four: Get ready for your “date.” Do your hair, make-up, and put on a fancy dress, just for fun and to make things more date-like. Pour yourself a glass a wine, everything is perfect!

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Step Five: Put kids back to bed after they keep getting out of bed. Pray they fall asleep before 8 pm, the time you have scheduled for your deployment date.

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Step Six: 8:05 pm. No word from the kids, no word from the husband. Just wait.

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Step Seven: 8:35 pm. Still waiting on your spouse, and you are getting quite sleepy.

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Step Eight: 8:55 pm. Debating on if you should call it a night, figuring he got held up somewhere. That happens, you know. But you can’t help but feel a little disappointed.

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Step Nine: 9:15 pm. Decide that your deployment date is a bust for the night. Get ready for bed, maybe tomorrow will work out better? Check your phone one more time, just in case.

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Step Ten: 9:45 pm. Crawl into bed, close your eyes, and fall asleep.

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Step Eleven: 9:55 pm. The phone starts to ring, he finally made it. Your phone wakes you up, but you don’t care.

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Step Twelve: You finally get to have your deployment date. You are in your pjs, but you don’t care. You finally get to talk to the love of your life and all is well in your world, at least for now.

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As military spouses, we sometimes have to make the best out of what we have, go with the flow, and hold on to the good moments among the more difficult ones.

Have you ever tried to have a date during a deployment?

Your Military Spouse Journey

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Your Military Spouse Journey

You can’t believe it is happening. Your spouse joined the Army. This is going to be their career. So many people have told you how scary military life is going to be, but all you can think about is that he is finally living his dream and that you want to be there with him as he moves forward with this career change.

You wonder about what this means for you. You wonder how about your life will change. You wonder how the next few years will be.

Your spouse gets their orders, overseas, how did we get so lucky? What will living overseas really be like? Will I enjoy living there as much as I think I will?

Finally, the day arrives, you say goodbye, you are not sure how you are going to make it through these months apart. You hope you will only be apart a month or two. So many worries going through your head.

How will you solo parent your toddler? Right now that seems impossible. How will you be both mom and dad to him? When you depended on your husband for so much ever since your son was born.

And time passes, and you think you have this military thing figured out. But deep down you know there is so much ahead for you. For both of you.

And more time passes, and he is still over there in Germany and you are still in the US waiting with your young son. And you have to wait some more, Christmas comes and goes and you are still waiting. Waiting on what? Paperwork of course.

And your birthday passes, and Easter is right around the corner. You start to feel like you might never join him. And then, you hear the news, everything has been approved and it is your time to go. The paperwork has finally be done, and you are approved to actually live with your spouse again.

After all that waiting and now all of a sudden you find yourself on an airplane, headed for your future, whatever that might be. What will it be like to be a military spouse? What will it be like to go through a deployment? So many questions go through your mind.

But then, your PCS is over, you have unpacked and are trying to find your way in a new community. You are trying to figure out where you belong. You always wanted to be a SAHM, and now, here you are.

And then the deployment orders come. You knew they would. You knew that is apart of the deal. But you are not ready, how could you be? How could you truly ever be ready to send your spouse to war?

You make friends, other military spouses who get it. You know you can get through this deployment together. You know you can handle whatever comes your way.

But you are pregnant again, and he might miss the birth. They told you they will send him back, but will they? Can a family member come out to help? Can you really give birth without your husband by your side?

And they don’t send him home in time, just three days too late. But you handle it, your mom was able to be there with you, and get your through. You conquered yet another scary thing. One of many that comes with military life.

He comes home for R&R. To be with you, your toddler and your new baby. You have an amazing time. But of course, the time flies by. Why can’t the deployment do the same?

He says goodbye, he goes back to Iraq, where he has been. Only a few more months, you can do this. You have done a few months before. One last kiss, one last hug.

And then months go by, but the end isn’t in sight like you thought it would be. Extensions are happening, the Surge, this will be a longer deployment than you first thought.

He won’t be back when you thought he would be. He will miss more birthdays. He will miss more milestones. Will your boys even remember him?

But eventually, after all this waiting, he is home, in your arms. Just in time. In time for another birthday, in time for Christmas, in time to enjoy life.

You are so thankful. He made it home. Not everyone did. You know this all too well.

And so life goes on, and you enjoy your time together. You move somewhere new, your boys get a little older, and you make new friends. And now, 365 days later, you are doing this deployment thing all again.

Saying goodbye, hoping and praying he returns. Being a solo parent. Depending on friends. Taking the deployment day by day.

And so your military life journey goes. From deployment to PCS. From making friends to saying goodbye to them. To the frustrations, to the moments you never would have had if he had never joined.

You married a soldier. A man who serves. He is willing to put on the uniform, to say goodbye to everyone he loves, to put himself in harm’s way.

And all these years later, you can’t believe what you have gone through. You can only look back and remember what you have learned. Through every deployment, every time apart.

And you hope that in the future, you can be just as strong. That you can help others get through their own military journeys through your words. That you can make a difference in the world and can be there for your boys, for your husband and everything that comes your way.

This is my military spouse journey, which may be a bit different than yours. Maybe you haven’t been through a deployment yet, maybe you have never been overseas. Maybe you kick solo parenting in the butt, and maybe solo parenting is the hardest thing you have ever had to do.

When your spouse joins the military, or when you marry them if they are already in, you are crossing over to a different type of life. You will experience things you never would have otherwise, both good and bad. You will learn from what you go through, and figure out ways to help others that come after you.

As a military spouse, you are a part of history. A part of the many men and women who have come before you and who will come after you. A part of something that can sometimes be hard to describe to other people.

While wars might look different, while times will change, one thing is always true…the military spouse life is a journey. One to love at times, one to hate at times, and one to embrace, with everything you’ve got.

Why You Should Dive Into Books During Your Next Deployment

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Why You Should Dive Into Books During Your Next Deployment

This post does contain affiliate links!

Twilight. I read all the Twilight books during one of our deployments. A friend told me about them, and even though I was already 30 years old, I dove right into that series.

I am a huge reader. I usually average about 70 books a year and would love to read more. I always have a couple of books going and always aware of some of the newest books that are out there.

I love most types of fiction, from a sweet romance to a crazy sci-fiction story. I read paper books, on my Kindle, and audiobooks. I always have at least one book with me. I also enjoy certain types of non-fiction, such as memoirs or fun topics that interest me.

There is not one day that goes by where I don’t read some part of a book, I just can’t do it. Reading is like brushing my teeth for me. Reading is just something I always do.

During deployments or any time my husband has been away from us, books have become even more important. I love to get lost in a series, read about some other time in history, or another place that I can’t physically visit at the moment.

I love a good binge-watch but there is something about getting lost in a good book that just takes me away from what I am dealing with and heals my soul a little bit. Stories are so very therapeutic and perfect to dive into during a deployment.

A good book can warm your heart, allow you to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, and distract you from something you would rather not think about.

Reading a good book can be a form of self-care and as military spouses, we know how important that is. Reading can keep you busy and staying busy is a must during a deployment.

If you haven’t picked up a book for a while, maybe now is the time? There are so many good ones. So many books to get lost in. So many books that will take you to another place.

If you are feeling lonely and missing your spouse, a book can put you in a better mood. If you are having a rough time with the kids, a book can make you laugh, and help you feel better. If you are dying to be somewhere else, a book can take you all over the world.

On a practical level, reading a book before bed can make you sleepy. If you are having trouble falling asleep when your spouse is deployed, try reading in bed. My Kindle is right by my bed so if I wake up in the middle of the night and can’t get back to sleep, I can read for a bit in order to do so. Works about 90% of the time 🙂

If you would love to read and feel like you don’t have any time, let me make a few suggestions.

  • Try audiobooks. You can listen to these while you are doing chores, while driving, or going on a walk. Use your library card with either Overdrive or Hoopla to check them out for free.
  • Always have a book handy. Put one in your car, put the Kindle app on your phone, or stick one in your purse. There are so many times you might have to wait somewhere and if you have a book on you, you can read a chapter or two. Jessica Turner’s book, The Fringe Hours: Making Time For You is a great read all about finding those extra moments.
  • Don’t think you have to read a book all in one sitting. I think part of the reason I can read so much is that I don’t feel the need to finish a book all in one sitting. If that were the case, I would never finish anything. Be okay with a chapter here and there, whenever you have time, and you will be able to get your reading done.
  • Read in front of your kids. Reading in front of your kids is totally fine. Just make sure they are safe, and you should be okay. You can read while you nurse, read while they are at the playground, or whenever you feel comfortable. Obviously, this is going to be an age thing and things will change as your kids get older but I don’t think kids growing up watching their parents read is ever a bad thing.
  • Join a book club. If you are really struggling, join a local book club. Usually, a book club will have one book you are supposed to read each month. Beyond that, at your book club, people will be talking about all the amazing books they are reading, and that can get your inspired too.
  • Join Bookstagram. Did you know that there is a name for all the accounts that share books on Instagram? Bookstagram is a wonderful place. I started an account just for books called The Fiction Book Cafe last fall and so glad that I did. I can talk about all the books I am reading and learn about what other book lovers are reading too. Make sure to join me over there 🙂

Need some suggestions on what to read?

For a sweet love story, check out One Day in December by Josie Silver, One True Loves by Taylor Jenkins Reid, or The Bride Test by Helen Hoang.

For a book with a twist, check out The Last Mrs. Parrish by Liv Constantine, Then She Was Gone by Lisa Jewell, or Lock Every Door by Riley Sager.

For an amazing story that spans many years, check out Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens, the Great Alone by Kristin Hannah, or Ask Again, Yes by Mary Beth Keane.

For a fantastic historical fiction book, check out Before We Were Yours by Lisa Wingate, Lilac Girls by Martha Hall Kelly, or The Last Year of the War by Susan Meissner.

For an emotional story, check out An American Marriage by Tayari Jones, This Is How It Always Is by Laurie Frankel, or The Heart’s Invisible Furies by John Boyne.

For a really amazing memoir, check out Educated by Tara Westover, Becoming by Michelle Obama, or Maid: Hard Work, Low Pay, and a Mother’s Will to Survive by Stephanie Land

For a book about time travel, check out the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon, The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger, or 11/22/63 by Stephen King. 

Looking for more suggestions? Check out my Goodreads and connect with me there too 🙂

How has reading helped you during a deployment?

When You Don’t Feel Strong Enough For Military Life

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When You Don't Feel Strong Enough For Military Life

I couldn’t believe he was gone. I couldn’t believe this deployment had started. I couldn’t believe I had to go through this again.

I certainly didn’t feel strong enough for this. I didn’t feel strong enough for the deployment. I didn’t feel strong enough for military life.

And yet, somehow, the days went by. Somehow I made it through that deployment. Somehow I was strong enough to do just that.

Through that deployment, and other past deployments, I realized something powerful.

Not feeling strong enough to get through something doesn’t mean I am not strong enough to do so.

Often times, us military spouses feel like if we are not 100% prepared for any possible situation, if we can’t get through everything military life brings with a smile on our face, if we can’t do a thing without a couple of meltdowns, we are not a good military spouse.

This isn’t true at all!

The truth is, you are not always going to feel as strong as you want to. I certainly don’t. Some days I might feel like I have military life down, and other days? Not so much.

So, if you are not feeling strong enough for military life, you are not alone, and there is nothing wrong with you.

Sometimes military life makes it hard to feel strong.

But what can you do about this? How can you find your inner strength? How can you get to a place where you feel like you can handle what military life is currently throwing at you?

Depend on your friends

I am not sure what I would have done over the years without my friends. They truly got me through, each and every deployment. From helping me stay busy, to being a shoulder to cry on. Depend on your friends, they can help you up when you are feeling down.

Don’t compare

This one is hard for me. When it feels like your husband is always the one who has to go, being happy for others can be more difficult. When it seems like your kids are the ones who have to go without their dad around, life can feel pretty unfair.

The best thing to do is to stop comparing yourself to other spouses, both civilian and military. Some service members deploy more than others. Some civilian spouses will never have to spend more than a weekend away from their spouse. And that is so hard to take.

But we can’t compare and dwell on how unfair everything is. We have to pull ourselves out of that. And if we can do that, we will be able to get to a better place and we won’t struggle with jealousy quite as much.

This too shall pass

If you need to tell yourself, “this too shall pass,” 50 times a day, do it. Reminding yourself that this deployment is a temporary situation is going to go a long way. I can’t tell you how many times I would feel like I was in stuck in a deployment funk, but simply reminding myself that the deployment was temporary helped me feel so much better.

When we are going through a difficult time, feeling like this is how life will always be is way too easy to do, but that isn’t the case. Look at how far you have come, and know you can be strong through the rest of the deployment too.

If you need extra help

If you are going through a deployment and you struggle with anxiety (which I do) or depression, please don’t be afraid to ask for extra help. Your mental health is so important and working on that during a deployment is a must.

When You Are Sick And Your Spouse Is Deployed

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When You Are Sick And Your Spouse Is Deployed

If you are a military spouse, and you get sick, it is probably going to be when your spouse is deployed, or otherwise not at home. You can thank Murphy’s law for that, I know I have been hit by Murphy myself.

While you can get to a place where you feel you are rocking a deployment, a stomach bug can turn things upside down, especially if you have young kids.

So…what should you do? What can you do? Here are some helpful tips for when you are sick and your spouse is deployed:

Ask for help

When you are sick, you might have to actually ask for help. If you are like me, this is going to be hard for you. I hate asking others for help and will try to do it all myself first.

However, I am not Superwoman and sometimes, I really need that extra help. If you have a close friend, see if they can bring you a few things from the store, or pick up a child from school. Most people are more than willing to help out a solo parenting military spouse.

Say no

If you are not feeling well, you are going to have to say no to some things. This can be hard to do sometimes. But we are all human, and we are all trying to get it all done, even if our spouse is overseas. And sometimes that means saying no, especially when we are sick.

Maybe the FRG won’t have as many food dishes that night, maybe a kid will have to skip practice, but sometimes we do have to let some things go during a deployment. Don’t burn yourself out when you are sick and don’t feel guilty if you have to say no to certain things. Besides, if you are contagious, you want to stay at home anyway.

Let your kids help you

If your kids are old enough, let them help you. Older children can help you with younger kids. Children can do extra chores, or help you around the house. Think about small ways they can help make things easier for you when you are sick.

Take care of yourself

In the end, remember to take care of yourself. Your health is important and you don’t want to ignore something that could become more serious later. Try to rest when you can, drink plenty of fluids, and get yourself to the doctor if you need to.

You should also be taking care of yourself before you get sick to hopefully lessen the chances of catching something. If you haven’t been for a checkup in a while, make an appointment. Don’t forget about your own dental care, and follow up on anything you think you need more information about.

When you get sick, all you really want to do is hide under your blankets but during a deployment, that probably isn’t going to be possible. Remember to ask for help if you need it, say no to some things, see if your kids can help, and remember that your health is important too.

Have you ever gotten really sick when your spouse was deployed? What did you do to get through that?

So You Just Found Out You’re Pregnant, And Your Spouse is Deploying

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So You Just Found Out You’re Pregnant, And Your Spouse is Deploying

You were trying, or maybe you weren’t. But the test is clear. You are pregnant, maybe with your first, maybe with your 4th but you know what this means.

Another baby…

A sibling for your two-year-old…

You are growing your family, just like you wanted to.

And as happy as you are, as excited as you are, there is something looming over your happiness.

Your husband, the father of your child, is deploying soon.

And you aren’t sure how you are going to handle everything. You just found out you are pregnant and he’s deploying…

When I found out I was pregnant with baby #2, there was a deployment in our future. We didn’t know exactly when. We didn’t know how long he would be gone. But we knew the deployment would happen.

And then it did. He left when I was 25 weeks pregnant, and I knew I had to figure out how to find my strength to get through this. I knew this deployment and pregnancy wasn’t going to be easy.

I had an almost two-year-old I would still need to take care of. I was already so tired but now I would be solo parenting. I also needed to figure out who would be with me during the birth. We didn’t know if my husband would be able to be there for that.

After he left and the deployment started, I went into survival mode and somehow got through the rest of my pregnancy. I made plans with friends, I asked my mom to come stay with me over my due date, and I took each day as it came, making the best of the time with just my two year-old.

If you have just found out you are pregnant and know there is a deployment in your future, here are a few things to think about:

Make Friends

Making friends through all of this is going to be such an important thing to do. You don’t have to go through this alone and having people who get what you are going through or can be there for you through everything is a must. When you are pregnant, you can also start getting out there and meeting other moms through places like MOPS or other groups on and off post.

Make Plans

With being pregnant and having a deployed spouse, you are going to need to make some plans. Who will you have there during your birth? What do you need to buy for your new baby? What will you do when you go into labor?

Make Time For Yourself

You need to make sure you are making time for yourself. You need to take care of yourself and your baby. While staying busy is a must, you also want to make sure you aren’t taking on too much. Look at your schedule and see where you can take some time to just chill and relax, even if it is just for a few minutes a day.

Make Decisions For You

Being pregnant with a deployed spouse, you are going to have people give you all sorts of opinions about what you should do. From a family member insisting that you move home druing the deployment to a neighbor expecting you to stay because she did. Try to figure out what would be best for you and your own situation and make decisions for you and your family.

So many of us have been through a pregnancy with a deployed service member or a spouse who has to be away for another type of training. When this happens it can bring up so many different feelings. You might wonder why your husband has to miss such a precious time in your life.

Figuring out the tools to get you through this time is so important. You can figure out what works for you and your situation. And doing that can get you through the pregnancy, the birth, and any other time your spouse will have to miss.

Have you been pregnant during a deployment? What got you through?

The Camo in my Living Room

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The Camo in my Living Room

I walk into my living room, and it is there. The camo. The color of the military.

Normally, this all lives in other parts of the house, put away, until it is needed. But today, I can see his military gear, and I know what that means.

The camo in my living room means he is getting ready to go. To serve. To train. To fight.

The camo in my living room means that I won’t be able to see him for a while. That he will be living somewhere else. That it is time for him to go.

Sometimes the camo means he is leaving for a little while, and that isn’t quite so bad.

Sometimes the camo means he is leaving for way too long, and my heart breaks a little when I think about what that means.

Often times, us military spouses get into the days of every day life. Our spouse is home, and while he might put on a uniform every day, or even just once a month, we feel pretty settled and content with everything.

And then we see the camo in the living room…

And we are reminded of what they signed up for, and what their purpose is.

And if we have been through this before, we are reminded about the lonely nights, the heartfelt goodbyes, and the long awaited homecomings.

We know we can get through what is ahead, although sometimes, we lose sight of that.

And even if we know we can get through any time apart, that doesn’t make saying goodbye any easier.

As we see them prepare for whatever is ahead, we wonder why we choose this road. Why did we marry a soldier? Why did we stand by when they signed those papers?

And as we watch our spouse packing things up, we know.

We know that this is who they are, and this is what they feel called to do. And we know that we feel called to them and for that, we know we can get through this challenge too.

As military spouse, we can go through periods of time when life just feels a little too hard. When we wish things were a little different, or that we had made different choices.

But…

As we watch them and see that camo in our living rooms, we feel a pride in our spouse that has chosen this road. And that even if watching them leave is difficult, we can stand by them as they go.

We know that we don’t have to go through all of this alone, other military spouses are doing the exact same thing.

We know we can help other spouses through this, because we have been there before.

We know that in the end, there is no other person we would rather be with, military and all.

So to those of you who also see camo in your living room during this season, you got this.

Even if the days are long…

Even if the tears keep coming…

Even if it seems like too much…

Because you are a military spouse, and you have the strength to handle the difficulties and challenges this life brings.

If you are getting ready to say goodbye, whether for just a few weeks or a lot longer, please visit the rest of my deployment blog posts, and know you are not alone.

The Deployment Journal For Spouses

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The Deployment Journal For Spouses

So you spouse just deployed, and you feel a bit lost. You just aren’t even sure what you are feeling but you know you are feeling something. You just want to get it all out.

Have you ever thought about keeping a deployment journal?

I have been writing in a journal since I was about 16 years old. I love them and while I write more during certain times of my life over others, I still keep one to this day.

During my deployments, they were like a best friend for me. Anytime I was upset, felt angry, or was just so sad I didn’t know what to do, I would grab my journal and let everything out. Doing so was so very helpful and I like to offer that advice to other military spouses.

The Deployment Journal For Spouses

Keeping a deployment journal can help you through your next deployment!

Because of my love of the journal, and knowing how much they can help during a deployment, I am having an amazing giveaway for the new verison of the Deployment Journal for Military Spouses by Rachel Robertson.

They also send me a copy for review, and this book, it’s beautiful. As someone who has journaled for years, finding the right book is important. One thing I look for is the cover, and this one passes my test.

The Deployment Journal For Spouses

This journal is a beautiful teal color which is one of my favorite colors. Teal is so soothing and calming to me. The color makes me want to pick up the book.

Within the book, you will find places to journal, prompts, tips, ideas, quotes, and even a place to write down your memories and milestones. This journal would be ideal for any military spouse going through a deployment. And I know this book will be a big help during the time your spouse is away.

The Deployment Journal For Spouses

Now, head on over to my Facebook page to enter. The giveaway will go until March 15th. Please visit Military Family Books if you would like to purchase this book for yourself, or want to know more about the book or the author.

Have journals helped you through a deployment???

Deployments Never Truly Go Away

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Deployments Never Truly Go Away

A Military spouse is never going to forget how hard it was to let their spouse go, how lonely the nights were or, how happy they were when they finally came home.

It’s been years since the first time my husband deployed, over a decade ago. But that deployment changed my life forever, as it changed the lives of so many of my military spouse friends.

That deployment changed my husband and all of the men he served with. That deployment still comes up in my mind, and I always think about those who lost so much during those 15 months.

Recently I saw this article going around Facebook again, as it often does every once in a while, Europe’s deadliest deployment. I always re-read the article when I see it, and reading those words bring me right back to that deployment. That place. And those feelings.

Our men were gone for so long, many didn’t see their spouse for over a year, my husband and I went 11 months between R&R and homecoming.

So many men were lost, so many didn’t come home, and not everyone who made it home was the same.

Us military spouses, being in a very small military community, had to cling to one another. I have never experienced anything quite like that since and I am thankful I had that type of experience during that 15-month deployment.

We somehow made it through that deployment, all 15 months of it, but that deployment changed us forever. That deployment shaped me into who I am today, more than any other deployment.

That deployment shaped me into who I became as a parent, realizing what was important and what I needed to let go. That deployment shaped me as a wife and gave me strength to get through whatever came our way in the future.

Sometimes I wonder how I went so long without seeing my husband. In the deployments since, we have never had to be apart for that long. And these days, even a few weeks seems so challenging.

When you are apart like that, you are living different lives. You have to. I had to be there for my boys, making parenting decisions, doing what was right for our home. He had to be aware of what his mission was, and focus on what he had to do for his job, and how to stay safe.

We both dealt with loss.

Me, for friends who lost their husbands and for the grief our community endured when we heard news of another death. You could see it on everyone’s face as you walked around the Army post. We were all feeling the weight of the deployment, in so many different ways.

For my husband, who lost friends, ones who had just as much desire to return home to their spouses and children as he did. There is still so much pain there. A pain I will truly never understand.

And now, all these years later we will hear of someone else who has lost their life to suicide, and we grieve again, for the ripples of that deployment or deployments after that are still affecting people to this day.

Deployments are a bit different now. Deployments are shorter, and for that I am thankful. Communication is much easier, and that helps. However, deployments are still not easy and the military and military spouses need as much support as they can get.

Support not only during deployments, although that is important, but support after, because that is an emotional ride for everyone.

When I think back to those 15 months, I realize that we just had to keep going, day by day. We couldn’t give up, even if we thought we wouldn’t make it through. And there were plenty of times we felt that way.

We had no choice but to get through the days apart and pray that our soldiers would come back to us.

You never forget your deployments. They stay with you forever. The smallest of things can remind you of what you went through. The smallest of things can take you right back.

Our military will probably always go to war in some form. And there will always be military families, spouses, and children who are going through the deployment back at home. And those of us that go through them will always remember these deployments and how we changed because of them.

We can learn more about ourselves from the time apart, and work to make life a little easier the next time our spouse has to go. We can support others going through a deployment, and let them know that they can get through them too.

This post does contain affiliate links!

Here are a few military spouse recourses that can help you through deployments, post-deoloyment, or military life in general:

Military One Source

Operation We Are Here

Sacred Spaces: My Journey to the Heart of Military Marriage by Corie Weathers

15 Years of War: How the Longest War in U.S. History Affected a Military Family in Love, Loss, and the Cost Of Service by
Kristine Schellhaas

Right Side Up: Find Your Way When Military Life Turns You Upside Down by Judy Davis

Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life Deployment Posts

Is there one deployment that sticks with you above any others? How do you work through everything?

When Your Spouse is Deployed and You Only Have Two Hands

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When Your Spouse is Deployed and You Only Have Two Hands

This post is sponsored by Baby Tula! I was also provided free product for review.

Whenever my husband was deployed, I hated going to the grocery store. I know there are more options these days such as grocery store pick-up or affordable delivery services, but back during our previous deployments, we didn’t have any of that.

So, once I had three kids, it became a big issue. I could sometimes get around this by going to the grocery store when my older two were in school, or trade with a friend. However, there were sometimes when I still had to take all three and head to the store. Or really anywhere I needed to go.

Baby Tula

There are different tools out there that can help us during our solo parenting days. One tool that helped me with my babies was having a good baby carrier to use, especially when I had to take all three kids to the grocery store. My baby would go in the carrier, he would stay close, then I would have two free hands to shop, and help my other children.

I could also use this carrier if we were going out to a special event or even a birthday party. I had a stroller as well, but a baby carrier is easier to use in some situations where a stoller would not work.

A lot of military spouse moms bring a carrier to MOPS or other types of playgroups. This allows them to move around, while still keeping their baby close. There are so many benefits to owning one, even if your husband is not deployed.

Baby Tula

So in those times when I did have to take all three of my children out somewhere, that baby carrier was a lifesaver. I only had two hands, with three little kids, I needed a solution.

Finding the right carrier is important. You want to find one that you like, that works for you and your baby, and is supportive.

The Explore Baby Carriers by Baby Tula would be a fantastic choice!

Baby Tula
  • This carrier is versatile, easy-to-use and the first carrier that allows you to use it in an ergonomic front-facing position.
  • There are a variety of prints to choose from, so you should be able to find something you love.
  • They have adjustable panels to use as your baby grows so you can use this Baby Tula from 7-45lbs.
  • They have three ergonomic carry positions, facing in, facing out, and back carry.
  • They have a military discount! Yay! 10% off for active duty, veterans, and retired military. Military status will be checked by a 3rd party.

If you are like me and your kids are all over toddler age, you can look at some of Baby Tula’s other products. They have shoes, blankets, backpacks, lunch bags, and more.

Baby Tula sent us one of their super cute backpacks in the Hot Lava theme. Isn’t it cute?

Baby Tula BackPack

And also one of these lunch boxes in the Chomp theme:

Baby Tula Lunch Box

If you are pregnant or already had your baby and would like a new carrier, please visit Baby Tula, and don’t forget the Baby Tula 10% military discount.

How has a baby carrier helped you when your spouse was away?