Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Military spouse life

Not All Military Housing is Created Equal, and Other Truths About Military Spouse Life

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I never thought I would be a military spouse. When I met my husband, he was 25 and had already served a few years in the Army. Little did I know that life would lead him back to the military, and make me a military spouse.

There have been so many surprises along the way, and I have learned so much. Here are just a few truths about military spouse life. Can you relate?

You might be told X will happen, but that doesn’t mean it will

There have been so many times in the last 15 years when military plans have changed. From deployments to trainings to appointments. Military life is all about change. Nothing is ever set in stone and it is probably best to assume nothing is going to happen a certain way until it actually does.

Military life isn’t fair!

Your spouse might deploy a lot more than other spouses. You might not ever end up at the “best” duty stations. Some service members take longer to promote than others. The best thing to do is celebrate when you are the one to get good news and be humble when you see that your friend or neighbor has not.

Not all military housing is created equal

When we moved into our orange duplex at our 2nd duty station in Germany, I cried. That house was amazing! And to think we got that amazing house just because we moved to a new duty station, not because of rank or position. That the two homes could be so different was amazing to me. Some housing is much better than others and that can be a frustrating reality of military life.

You will grow without your spouse by your side

During military life, you and your spouse will grow. You will change. Everyone does. Sometimes this will happen when they are not home. During a deployment, you can grow and change and because you have, life can be a bit of a challenge once your spouse gets home. Keep this in mind during the redeployment period and remember why you decided to be together in the first place.

Your parenting will look a little different

Survival mode is very real and sometimes being in survival mode means you let things go and your parenting will change because of that. Try not to let this get you down, real-life sometimes doesn’t mix with our ideals. Do your best and at the end of the day, give yourself some grace.

You will surprise yourself

During the last 15 years, I have done things I never thought I was capable of. I have been stretched and have become stronger because of everything I have been through. Military life will mold you into the person you are meant to be. And you will look back and might be surprised about everything you have had to go through to get there.

When military life is over, you might not want to leave

As much as you think you are ready to leave military life behind, doing so isn’t as easy as you think the transition will be. You might find yourself missing parts of military life and wondering why you and your spouse decided that chapter needed to be closed. You might get upset that your spouse had to leave because of medical issues. Give yourself time to adjust to the after military lifestyle.

The “worst” duty station might be your favorite

There are a few duty stations out there that have the reputation of being the worst place you could get stationed. Places you really don’t want to go and for a lot of them, there is a good reason for that. But sometimes, the “worst” duty station may be your favorite place.

Maybe you have figured out how to bloom where you are planted or maybe you just made some amazing friends, but whatever reason you will always look back at that duty station as some of the best years of your military life.

How long have you been a military spouse? What have you learned along the way?

What Milspouses Need When They Are Feeling Lonely

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Loneliness and deployments go hand and hand, don’t they? It just seems to be apart of the deal. We miss our spouse or partner when they are away, and that loneliness can come after too many days apart.

I know I feel it. Sometimes very strongly.

Loneliness can hit at the most random of times. From when I see another couple holding hands or our favorite song comes on the radio…yes I sometimes still listen to the radio, don’t judge šŸ˜‰

Right after my husband left for his first deployment, I was sitting with a few other wives. We were waiting to see the men drive by on the buses, so we could wave goodbye one last time. As we sat there, we really didnā€™t know what we were really dealing with.

We didnā€™t know then how hard the deployment would be. How scary the deployment would feel at times. We really had no idea how lonely we would feel over the months our husbands were deployed.

As the deployment got going, the feeling of loneliness took over me. I remember sitting in my bathroom, after my son went to sleep, wondering how I was going to get through that time without my husband. He is the one person I could talk to about anything.

Even the silly things. The everyday things. The things spouses talk about with one another.

So what can you do when you are feeling so lonely during a deployment? What do milspouses need when they are feeling this way?

A true community

Maybe it is online, maybe it is friends at your duty station, but you need to find some type of community. A group of people to help you through and help you get through that loneliness.

Finding that community can be quite difficult sometimes. You might not feel like you belong or that anyone else cares. But people do, many people do. You just have to find them.

Military spouse communities can be your best support. Other spouses who get it and understand. Other spouses who know all about that deployment loneliness and can get what you are going through.

A good support system

Your support system goes even deeper than your community. It is your parents and your siblings and your friends back at home. It is your milspouse best friend and your civilian neighbors that can help you out when you need it.

Us military spouses need people we can vent to without judgment. We need people who we can call if we have to take a kid to the ER or need someone to help us out with some type of issue. And we need people we can connect with when that loneliness sets in.

Ways to stay busy

Staying busy is one of the best things you can do to get through a deployment. Even more so when that loneliness sets in. You can stay busy in your home, working on projects. You can stay busy by going out, and even hanging out with other people.

Although right now that might be a bit difficult with 2020 and all, normally, finding those friends to spend time with will speed up your deployment.

Back when we were going through a deployment in Germany, a friend and I would let each other know when we needed a “steak night.” That meant, going to one of our houses, ordering pizza for the kids, and making ourselves a nice steak dinner.

It was a way to stay busy, spend time with friends, and that helped so much with the loneliness both of us were feeling.

What do you do when you are starting to feel lonely during a deployment?

When It Feels Like Military Life Isn’t Fair

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Military life isn’t fair. It really isn’t. One of the mistakes I made going into this life was thinking military lifeĀ might be fair. I know life isn’t fair but I guess I just assumed that the Military would be. The military is structured and organized, right?

What on earth was I thinking???

I thought that if you turned your paperwork in on time, you would get a quick response. Nope. Sometimes you have to wait because so and so went on a two-week vacation.

Other times your paperwork gets lost or sent to the wrong department. You really have to be on top of it. We stopped getting our BAH once because we didn’t send in a rental agreement, only no one told us we needed to and it took a while to figure out why that was happening.

I thought that if you went through one deployment, you would get a break on the next one. Nope. It really just depends on the unit and luck. Two soldiers can enlist the exact same day in the exact same MOS and have a completely different career path.

You can control some of this, but not everything. Sometimes what happens is just random and that is hard to get over when you think there should be some sort of fairness to this type of life. I learned that fairness has no place in a deployment schedule.

And this is another reason why you really never know what you signed up for. You can never really see how military life is going to pan out. You just have to “buckle your seat belt” and get ready for the ride.

You have to hope for the best while also preparing for the worst. And that isn’t always easy to do.

I have learned that you just can’t plan everything out based on what you think should happen. You can’t even plan based on what has happened in your spouse’s career in the past. Things change you really just have to go with the flow.

I am such a planner. I want to know what is going on, what time it is going on, where it will be happening, and what I need to do to prepare.

Military life makes this hard sometimes.

You might get little notice for something. Some people move with just a few weeks notice. Others go through the deploying one week, not deploying the next to end up deploying anyways.

I had to let go of the idea that everything will lead to a nicely wrapped future. I don’t think that is true for anyone.Ā If I could go back in time and tell myself anything it would be that.

I would tell myself thatĀ things will happen that I have no control over and that I just have to roll with the changes. I think life would have been a little bit easier if I had realized that in the beginning.

If you are new to Military life and you are already feeling the unfairness of it all, take a step back.

RealizeĀ that it is going to be this way sometimes. That the best thing to do is try to roll with what is going on, vent to those who understand, and figure out a way to get through the difficult situation.

Look for the good benefits thatĀ this life brings, they are there. If it wasn’t for the Military, I wouldn’t have met the friends I did or traveled to the places I was able to go. I would be a different person and I am not sure I would be as strong.

Try not to be jealous of others. Be happy for them because you never know what might happen in the future. Try to enjoy the journey as best as you can.

Find friends who get what you are going through, depend on family who wants to help you, and try to support others when you can.

It’s Okay Military Spouse, It’s Really Okay, I Have Been There

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It's Okay Military Spouse, It's Really Okay, I Have Been There

In November, I will hit 15 years of being a military spouse. 15 years! That seems so hard to believe sometimes, other times…it feels like I have been living this life so much longer.

Some years are easier than others. Some years have more separations than others. Some years just feel so much more difficult than others.

But there have also been so many good memories over the years. I have met so many amazing people. I am thankful for all that I have been able to experience from this life.

Often times it can feel like military life is dragging us down. That we would be so much better off if our spouse found another career. That we shouldn’t even be in this position or that we are not strong enough to make it through.

But I think one of the things that helps through all of this is knowing that you are not going through any of this alone. That there are other military spouses who have been through it all too. And that we can all learn from one another.

It’s okay Military Spouse, it’s really okay and I have been there.

I have waited months and months to see my husband because of paperwork.

I have given birth without my husband in the same country.

I have missed best friends getting married and having babies because of the Army.

I have had to say goodbye to my husband more than once not knowing if I would ever see him again and if I did if he would be the same person I married.

I have had to watch as friends got that knock. The one that changed their lives forever.

I have had to watch friends as the husband they loved and adored become a completely different person because of PTSD and decided he no longer wanted to be with them or their children anymore.

I have said goodbye to friends that have become like family to me and know I might not ever see them again.

I have had to sit and wonder during a blackout knowing that my husband was probably okay but also not knowing why the blackout was going on.

I have sat with a group of wives while our children played and we tried to figure out how we would get through the next 3-4 months of a deployment that was supposed to have ended the month before.

I have been through the lonely nights, the jealousy of knowing our civilian friends have never had to go longer than a few days without their spouses, of being mom and dad to the children, of comforting sad kids that just want their Dad at a soccer game.

I have had to tell my children that our vacation was canceled because their dad got called up to go somewhere for a few weeks instead.

I have been through it and although it made me a stronger person, I do wonder what I would be like if I hadn’t had to deal with all of this. I wonder if some of my struggles and issues are because of the years of war and I am not really sure what I can do with all of that.

Because life as a military spouse is up and downā€¦

Because life as a military spouse is so much harder than anyone could ever predictā€¦

Because life as a military spouse can be so full of surprises, and some of those can knock you off your feet.

So if you as a Military spouse need to cry and vent, if you need to go home for a while, if you need to see a counselor, if you just need a friend who gets it, I understand. I totally understand. I have been there.

We have each other to lean on, we have each other to learn from. We have each other to vent with, and we have each other to get through this life with.

And although some days are harder than others, the truth is, we all fell in love with someone who wants to serve their country. And deep down we know that this is where we are supposed to be.

How long have you been a military spouse?

When Your Countdown Gets Delayed

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When Your Countdown Gets Delayed

It was April and my husband would be home in June. Only a couple more months to go. I sat down at my computer in my apartment in Germany and looked through all of the summer dresses. I would need to pick something out for homecoming.

I decided to look later and headed to bed, completely unaware of what the next day would bring. Completely unaware of how everything would change and how I wouldn’t need a summer homecoming dress after all.

That next day, we heard the news. The men were not coming back in June, they were being extended and this deployment would go from nine months to twelve just like that.

As military spouses, we know things change all the time. Orders change, locations change, dates change.

We know this and yet, we still hope they don’t. We still wonder if we might be the lucky ones where dates don’t change, and everything happens the way we think it should.

But the reality is, things don’t always go so smoothly during our military spouse lives. We are always having to adjust. Even if it is very hard to do so.

When I heard on the news that all military travel and moves were on hold in Italy and South Korea because of the Coronavirus, I thought about how this was going to be a delay for some military families. And while this one isn’t because of military reasons, it is still a delay.

I know there are some military families who have been counting down the days until their move. I know there are military spouses who assumed their loved one would be back in their arms this month. I know there is a lot of disappointment because of this.

And maybe you have been through this too. Maybe you have been through a deployment extension, or maybe your PCS orders got moved from May to September. Maybe you planned everything out with your kids and their schedules only to be told everything was going to change.

When your countdown gets delayed, no matter what it is for, it is hard to not get extremely frustrated by the whole thing. I know for me, I tend to go down the “what if” hole rather quickly.

What if it gets delayed again?

What if we miss doing something we had planned?

What if this happens every time we PCS or for every deployment?

Because my husband’s first deployment was extended, I had a fear it would happen each and every time. It was so difficult to let go of that. Worried that he would get extended again was always in the back of my head.

And sure, the best thing to do would be to assume the longest time possible, but that is hard to do in reality. When you have young kids, and struggling through each day, the last thing you want to do is tell yourself it is okay if this deployment also gets extended past a year.

So what should you do when your countdown gets delayed? How can you stay calm? Here is what worked for me:

1) Find friends to get through the delay with.

See if anyone else is going through the same thing. The good thing about going through the extension where we were stationed is that almost every single military spouse was going through it too. It was a pretty small post and we were able to come together to help one another through.

2) Make more plans.

Fill up that calendar. Go somewhere every day if that is possible. Staying busy is going to help you, and keep your mind off the waiting. Because that is what a delay is about. Just more waiting.

If you are not able to get out and do stuff away from home, make fun plans inside your home. Start a new hobby, teach your kids something new, or have a movie marathon. You want to avoid just sitting there being sad about your situation, time does not pass that way.

3) Don’t go down the rabbit hole

This is going to be the hardest part. I can go down this hole rather quickly and it gets me so upset. All the “what ifs” can mess with your head.

Talk things over with your spouse, try to focus on any of the good things you are going through at the moment, and no matter what the delay is, things will get moving again eventually.

4) Learn from it all.

I learned a lot from my husband’s delayed homecoming date. It wasn’t always fun, and I cried a lot of tears.

But after he got home, I was able to look back and learn from everything I went through. I was able to pull the good out of the situation and even though I wouldn’t want to go through all of that again, I was glad that I learned something from the experience.

I think sometimes that is all we can do with a stressful delay of any kind. We know they can happen, but when they do, they can really throw us off.

I hope that whatever delay you are experiencing you can find ways to make it through. That you can get through this with friends, family, and by finding creative ways to do so. You got this military spouse!

ā€œLife is a cycle, always in motion, if good times have moved on, so will times of troubleā€ ā€“ Indian proverb

Just Another MilSpouse Valentine’s Day

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Just Another MilSpouse Valentine's Day

You can head to your local Target before it is even January 1st and be hit in the face with Valentine’s everything. That stuff shows up way before your ready and seems to stick around way too long. All for one day in February.

As a military spouse, this day can be pretty frustrating. If your spouse is deployed, if your boyfriend is away at basic, if your service member is off training somewhere, you kinda just want to skip the whole thing.

At the same time, you wouldn’t mind getting some flowers, eating some conversation hearts, and even doing something special for your kids.

It’s just another milspouse Valentine’s day, and your emotions are all over the place.

Should you send your spouse a Valentine’s Day care package? Should you host a Galentine’s Day party instead? What if you just don’t want anything to do with the day?

The good news is, you can do what you want, and make Valentine’s Day what you want. You can do what works for you and your family and you don’t have to feel guilty about it.

So, for a milspouse Valentine’s Day, you can:

Go all out

For some, Valentine’s day is all about the red, the pink, and the glitter. If this is you, send a fun Valentine’s Day care package. If your spouse is home, plan for a nice homecooked dinner or make reservations at a local restaurant.

Find a fun present your spouse or partner will love and do what you can to make them feel special. Decorate your home, and get all the candy hearts. There are so many ideas on Pinterest, from making yummy treats, to creating some amazing homemade Valentines.

Celebrate with friends

Galentine’s Day is February 13th, but that doesn’t mean you can’t actually celebrate with friends on the 14th. Maybe everyone’s spouse is deployed and you want to plan a special potluck. Maybe you just want to get together for lunch to enjoy your friendship.

Celebrating friendship is a fun way to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Especially in the milspouse world when our sweethearts are across the ocean. Have fun with it and turn Valentine’s Day into a today for friends.

Celebrate with your kids

Kids always love a good celebration. Bake some Valentine’s Day cookies, put together a fun basket, or just enjoy the night with fun heart-shaped foods.

Help your kids make valentines with your kids for their class. Sometimes this means finding a fun idea on Pinterest and other times adding a couple of candy hearts to a Star Wars pack you got at the Commissary. Don’t put any pressure on yourself or your kids to do something you don’t want to do. In the end, kids love all the valentines they get, no matter how long they took to make.

Do nothing at all

Maybe you are just over Valentine’s Day and sick of wondering year after year if your spouse will even be home for the holiday. I know for us there were quite a few years in a row where my husband was gone, either on deployment or training over February 14th. I think one year he might have even left on Valentine’s Day!

You don’t even have to do anything with the day. You don’t have to give anyone a Valentine’s Day card, and you don’t have to put a lot of pressure on yourself to have that perfect holiday. After all, wasn’t Valentine’s Day made up by a card company anyway?

Whatever you decide to do this year, enjoy it. Maybe this year you are just going to ignore this February holiday, knowing that next year you could do something different. Maybe you just want to celebrate with your friends or family. Enjoy! And make sure to go back to Target on February 15th to get your half-priced chocolate šŸ™‚

The Best Lessons a Military Spouse Can Learn

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The Best Lessons a Military Spouse Can Learn

As we are getting close to the end of this decade, I decided to go into my Shutterfly account and try to organize my photos a bit more. As I was looking through older photos I came across one from Thanksgiving 2012.

I think my husband was home, but we got together with a bunch of friends and their kids and looking at that photo brought back so many memories. Of time with this circle of friends. A group that slowly fell apart because of one move or one PCS after another.

I am actually still here, and everyone else has moved on but it really made me think about what we go through as military spouses. I thought about all the lessons we can learn during our time as a military spouse. It really made me reflected on how I have grown as a person over the years since my husband re-joined the military so many years ago. I’m sure many of you can relate šŸ™‚

Friendships Won’t Stay the Same

I love having a friend circle. A group of other women I can talk with, vent with, and depend on. A group of other people who get me.

I am so thankful I have found this during my years as a military spouse, however, my friend circles are always temporary. Always. Sure, I am still friends with those people, we keep in touch for the most part, and follow each others lives.

But it will never be the same as it was when we all lived in the same town, or when our husbands were all deployed, or when we all had two-year-old boys to entertain, just trying to figure out how to get through the day.

Time moves own, PCSing happens, and we figure out how to say goodbye and go forward.

And that is just apart of this military life. A part that is hard to take sometimes. A part that will stop you in your tracks as you remember a fun memory or a time when you were all together.

I also know that those memories will always be with me. I will never forget the Space-A trip we took together when our husbands were deployed, the late-night shopping on Black Friday, or just the simple day-to-day moments of getting together to let the kids play.

I still value these friendships even though the miles separate us. I still think about these women, even if we never talk anymore. And I always have hope of finding new friends along the way. Not to replace the old, but to add to my life experiences.

Homesickness Can Hit Hard

I haven’t lived at my parent’s house full time since I left for college over twenty years ago. I still get homesick. I still have moments where I think for a few minutes about how I could move back.

Wherever you call home will probably always call to you in some way. Maybe it is your family, and all the fun you have together. Maybe it is the warmth you feel every time you visit your hometown. Maybe it is just longing for a place that is so imprinted on your heart, you know you will never truly let it go.

I always wanted to move away from home. I always wanted to see other places and experience different ways of living. But there is still apart of me that can get pretty homesick sometimes. It doesn’t last too long but the feeling is there.

You might be ready to take on the world. You might be living in Europe or Japan and know how exciting it is that you get to do so. And you might be hit with homesickness all the same. Hitting you in the face when you least expect it too.

I think this is just another part of military life we military spouses can experience. We are the family that doesn’t live there anymore. We can feel like the outsider. And those emotions aren’t always easy to deal with at times.

Making our new duty station or city feel like home is key. Even if we know we will only be there for a few years, we can figure out ways to connect to our community, and enjoy what is before us.

Deployments Can Be Good For Us

I never wanted my husband to deploy. The deployments were never at the right timeā€¦and always seem to throw a wrench into the plan for my life. However, in someways deployments were good for me.

I learned how to be more independent whether that meant taking care of two toddlers by myself or learning to mow the lawn and other chores I otherwise never would have done.

I figured out that I am stronger than I think I am. I figured out that I could do things that I never dreamed were possible. And that if I have to do them in the future, I can handle what comes our way.

I learned how I can truly be a good friend to a struggling military spouse and how to let people help when I was the one in need.

Deployments can be too long and make you just want to cry but they can also help you grow as a person. I will always be thankful for that.

Plans Change And Thatā€™s Okay

How many times have plans changed for you as a military spouse? Maybe you went through an unexpected deployment or a PCS to a place you never thought you would end up. Whatever it is, you start to get used to things always changing in the military.

I really learned this during our 15-month deployment that was at one point only supposed to be 9 months, then later 12. I learned this when I was told it would take just about a month to join my husband in Germany and we had to wait 4.5. I learned this when he deployed for the 3rd time and we werenā€™t sure if he would be gone for 5 months or over a year.

Things change all the time and nothing can feel predictable. But…sometimes these changes end up bringing us to a better place. Sometimes these changes lead us to places and people we never would have imagined. Sometimes these changes were exactly what we needed in our life.

This isnā€™t to say that every time the military changes its mind we should be happy about it. Itā€™s okay to be frustrated but it can also give us an opportunity for growth and change that we never would have had otherwise. A chance to embrace something a little scary and see where that might lead.

What lessons have you learned as a military spouse this last year?

Donā€™t forget to check out The Newbieā€™s Guide to Military Life: Surviving a PCS and More by Soldierā€™s Wife, Crazy Life and Mrs Navy Mama. Your guide for learning about military life.

18 Military Spouse Memes When You Just Need A Good Laugh

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18 Military Spouse Memes When You Just Need A Good Laugh

Sometimes, and some days, you just need a good laugh. Here are 18 military spouse memes that should at least put a smile on your face:

Military Spouse Memes

Oh, I have done this a couple of times, and once, I even dropped my ID in between the seats and couldn’t find it. That was embarrassing.

Military Spouse Memes

I know some are lucky and can get stationed by the beach…but for others? It just never seems to happen.

Military Spouse Memes

Please, for the love, do not pack my trash!

Military Spouse Memes

Ya, Kentucky and Tennessee are beautiful, but not when you want to be adventurous and travel around Europe for 3-5 years.

Military Spouse Memes

Yes, yes the commissary will be. Maybe going to Kroger or Walmart on those days would be a better choice?

Military Spouse Memes

They sure do! Forever and ever! And ever!

Military Spouse Memes

Pretty much! Good thing Netflix is so good at making some amazing shows.

Military Spouse Memes

Yep, when I do have to use mine, I have to make sure I don’t accidentally use his.

Military Spouse Memes

For reals! Can you even PCS without freaking out at least once?

Military Spouse Memes

Yes! What is your drink of choice?

Military Spouse Memes

Wait…was it 37043 or 95406? I can’t remember anymore. What state am I even in?

Military Spouse Memes

Target! Yes! Just show me where the Target is!!!

Military Spouse Memes

Ouch! At least that means they are home right?

Military Spouse Memes

If only we could always be at the same duty stations as our friends!

Military Spouse Memes

Oh, the decisions we have to make. You really don’t want to have to buy a new heavy coat but do you really want to save it for a few years?

Military Spouse Memes

Make sure you learn what these mean! And try not to get them confused…;)

Military Spouse Memes

I bet you feel accomplished now!

Military Spouse Memes

Right? Could be somewhere north of here, west of here, south of here, or 2,000 miles away, who knows?

Well, I hope these military spouse memes cheered you up and made you laugh a little. Enjoy your military spouse life!

When You Are Faced With A Really Bad Deployment

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When You Are Faced With A Really Bad Deployment

There is never suchĀ a thing as a good deployment. I don’t think very many spouses jump for joy when they hear the news their soldier will have to deploy. There is a lot of sadness that comes with the news. However, there can be deployments and there can be really bad deployments.

Some deployments are really bad because they are too long.

Some deployments are really bad because more than a few people lose their life or come home injured.

Some deployments are really bad because they come at the worst possible time for that particular family. Whether it is because of a child or a marriage or something else.

When You Are Faced With A Really Bad Deployment

 

Some deployments are really bad because you don’t feel emotionally ready for them to begin.

Some deployments are really bad because you never thought that this deployment would happen.

Whatever the reason, starting a really bad deployment can hit you emotionally. These deployments can cause a lot of pain and tears.

So what do you do if you are in this situation?

What should you do when the ordersĀ have been cut, you know when they are leaving, and you feel like you just can’t deal with everything?

When You Are Faced With A Really Bad Deployment

1) Find a battle buddy. You need one. It doesn’t have to be someone who is also going through a deployment but that can help. Find someone you can call at 11 pm at night because your 2-year-old has a 104 fever and you need someone to watch your three other kids.

Find someone you can go to coffee with. Find someone who will not judge you and you will walk with you through the whole deployment. If you are new or all your friends moved away, go places where you can meet people. MOPS, PWOC, FRG, book club or even the gym are perfect places to make new friends.

2) Start to see a counselor. This is what I had to do. I had never been to one before but when I felt the floor falling underneath me at the thought of my husband deploying again, I knew I had to go.

You can easily do this through Tricare. They pay for at least eight visits, maybe more. Go to Military One Source for more information. Don’t feel any shame in this at all. Sometimes we just need someone to talk to about everything going on in our lives.

3) Make plans. Fill up your calendar. Plan a trip, plan a visit home, plan to start classes or something else you have always wanted to do. You are going to need to stay busy. The busier you are, the better things will be. If you can have things in place before they even leave, all the better.

When You Are Faced With A Really Bad Deployment

4) Cry when you need to. I think sometimes Military spouses feel they need to be strong every hour of every day. The truth is, we need to let it out sometimes.

After the kids go to bed, have a good cry, write in your journal, grab a glass of wine and turn on a fun movie. It is okay to be sad about this. Deployments are hard and they are not any fun. Cry when you need to. Doing so will be good for you.

Deployments can be hard on people. They can seem too overwhelming and something you wish would just go away. The fact is, if you are married to someone in the Military, they will be part of your life eventually. The best thing to do when faced with one is get prepared as much as you can. Hopefully, these tips can help you get ready for your next time of separation.

What would you add to this list?

Operation Rocker With Cracker Barrel and Operation Homefront

by

Cracker Barrel

This is a sponsored post with Cracker Barrel!

Every time we go to Cracker Barrel we always take some time to sit in the rocking chairs out front. They are perfect for your porch, to sit and enjoy the evening or to have a cup of coffee before work. I am working together with Cracker Barrel on this post and they sent me one of their rocking chairs to put together, decorate, and gift to someone special. When they did, I knew who I wanted to give this rocker to.

My husband, who is in the National Guard, first joined the Army back in 1996. Although he did take a break, I joke it was in order to meet me, he has served a total of about 13 years, both active duty, and with the National Guard. He spends his weeks working hard at his civilian job and then when it is time for drill, puts on his uniform, and goes and serves his country. And his birthday is coming up.

I knew that my husband would love a rocking chair for his birthday. We have a front porch at our home here in Tennessee and I knew a rocking chair would be perfect for him to sit in after work or on a Saturday morning, especially since it has finally started cooling off here.

Operation Rocker With Cracker Barrel and Operation Homefront

When he is not working, he likes to relax and I knew the rocking chair would allow him to do so more than the chairs we already had out there. My six-year-old son and I took some time to decorate the chair for him too. He loves this type of thing and knowing he was making it for his Dad made working on it even better.

Operation Rocker With Cracker Barrel and Operation Homefront

My helper šŸ™‚

We decided to go with a red, white, and blue patriotic theme for the chair. We used several different types of ribbon and a red, white and blue star decoration.

Cracker Barrel

Cracker Barrel provides a good meal for your whole family. They have a home-away-from home feel and whenever someone visits us from out-of-town, we like to take them there. The restaurant was established in 1969 in Lebanon, TN and there are 644 stores in 44 states today. Not only do they have good food, their breakfasts are my favorite, but they have an amazing country store you have to spend time in when you go.

Operation Rocker

The Operation Rocker campaign with Cracker Barrel and Operation Homefront is a way for the community to give back to the military and the veterans who have served their country. Cracker Barrel will donate a rocking chair to Operation Homefront for every adult rocker that is purchased on Cracker Barrel’s website until Labor Day (9/4/17.)

In addition to donating the rockers, Cracker Barrel also donated 10% of proceeds from all in-store adult rocker sales to Operation Homefront during the weekend of June 30th-July 4, 2017.

Operation Homefront

Operation Homefront offers relief, resiliency, and recurring support to military families across the nation. After starting shortly after 9/11, they have served tens of thousands of military families across the country. I know we have benefited from them in the past too.

Operation Rocker is one way to help so they can continue to help military families. The program Homes on the Homefront, which Operation Rocker supports, has also awarded nearly 600 mortgage-free homes as well as providing over $48 million in deeded value to veterans and their families. Other programs include the Fisher House, United Through Reading, The Legion Fund and more.

Last year, over 700 rockers were purchased during this program. Cracker Barrel and the Cracker Barrel Old Country Store Foundation together contributed over $430,000 to Operation Homefront through both monetary and in-kind donations. To kick off this year, they awarded a $50,000 grant to Operation Homefront.

Head on over to the Cracker Barrel website and buy a rocker for you or that special person in your life. Doing so is a way to give back to veterans and you can enjoy the benefits of having a rocker on your porch too.