Happy to have this guest post by Megan on her best advice for a military spouse. Please email me at Julie@soldierswifecrazylife.com and let me know if you would like to write a guest post for Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life too.
The best advice I can give a new military spouse is to brace yourself. Being a military spouse is hard work. It does not matter what branch, what rank, if you’re full-time, guard, or reserve. Military life is a big adjustment and you cannot prepare yourself for it.
I married my husband 5 years ago. He is in the Army National Guard and we were part-time. He had a civilian job, went to drill one weekend a month, and training two weeks a year. Or that’s what I was told.
After we were married things changed very quickly. Suddenly, he was putting on a uniform every day and going to work at the armory. There were schools he went to that lasted a month or more. There were classes he would travel to go to.
For Hurricane duty, he would pack a bag at a moment’s notice, leave and I didn’t know when he would be back. Annual training went from two weeks to three and then to four weeks. Before I knew it, he was gone all the time.
One year, from January to August he was only home for 10 weeks. Now I am in our first deployment and that really shocked me to the core. Even though I was used to him not being home, deployment created several new issues I had not planned on having to struggle with. It is hard being the only adult making decisions and trying to roll through whatever Murphy’s Law is throwing at you.
So, the advice I give to spouses I talk with is to:
- Breathe…..take it one day at a time.
- If you can’t take it day by day, that’s ok. Take it hour by hour, minute by minute. You do whatever you need to do to survive that day.
- Every day will get a little easier and so will the next and the next. Before long you will be a professional conquering Murphy’s Law and navigating through the military world.
- Find your tribe, lean on other spouses. Other spouses are your best resource for information and support. They might not be in the same boat, but they are in the same storm.
- Most importantly…..take care of you!! If you are not taking care of yourself, you cannot take care of anyone else.
Best of luck to all new military spouses. I hope you enjoy this life as much as I do.
My name is Megan Davis. I have a full-time paying job and volunteer jobs that I love. I currently work as a Personnel Supervisor at Westaff where I match people in my community looking for jobs with companies looking for workers. I volunteer as the Family Readiness Group Leader for the 2-108 CAV Squadron in Shreveport. I work with Military Spouse Advocacy Network (MSAN) mentoring other National Guard Spouses. Following these passions, I was recognized as the 2020-2021 Louisiana National Guard Spouse of the Year. I love helping people, specifically military spouses. One of my main goals is to make sure military spouses know they are not alone when trying to navigate through the military world. I want to help give them the courage to speak out and help build a support system for them so they can make it through all the crazy things the military life throws at us. I am also a student at the University of Louisiana at Monroe for my bachelor’s degree in risk management. Graduating from ULM has been my biggest goal for years and I am proud to say I am almost there.