• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

  • Home
    • My Disclosure Policy
    • My Privacy Policy
    • Contact Me
  • Advertise
  • The SWCL Shop
  • Duty Stations
  • My Writings
  • Military Life
    • Movies & TV
    • Disneyland
    • Books
  • So Your Spouse Just Deployed??? Click Here!!!
  • Fort Campbell
You are here: Home / Asperger's / What I have learned about raising special needs children

What I have learned about raising special needs children

February 13, 2013 by Julie 1 Comment

Asperger'sThis weekend we had a hard Asperger’s Day. Friday night he threw a three-hour fit. Luckily the next day he was rather calm and very pleasant. It seems to be the way it goes.

As I look back on Friday I have to ask myself what I could have done differently. I look at what choices I made that led to it. How it could have been prevented and what I can do in the future if a similar situation comes up.

I thought about what it is like to be a special needs parent. How life is just a little different when it comes to parenting special needs kids. How things don’t always go the way you want or the way you think they might go.

I thought I would talk about some of the things I have learned over the years about  raising special needs children…

  • Learn to pick your battles. This is a biggie. Although you want to be firm with your kids, sometimes you do have to pick your battles. If your kid is in a certain mood, everything is going to cause a problem so pick what is important and don’t worry about the rest. This was part of the issue on Friday. I should have just stuck to the major issue we were dealing with instead of expecting him to do more than that. If your kid only wants to wear his jacket like Batman does and getting on the bus is a big issue anyways, let it go. It really isn’t that big of a deal. Focus on the getting on the bus part. Don’t worry about the jacket.
  • Take time for yourself. You need it. When you feel like it is getting to where YOU need a timeout, take one. If you are the only adult in the house it might be a little harder to do this. You might need to just say, “You know, ME taking a timeout is more important than THIS battle.” If there is another adult in the house, have them take over for a while. Go take a bath, read a book or meet a friend for coffee.
  • Look at the big picture. Instead of thinking about the bad days, look back over the last few weeks or months and see how far your child has come. If it helps, ask a friend to remind you of this. They don’t see your kids everyday and can notice more of a difference. I know with my oldest I felt he would never really learn to talk. But then I would take to a friend who only saw him every few months and she would tell me how much better he was doing. It was hard for me to see since I was always with him. It helped to hear that others saw the progress even if I didn’t.
  • Find a good support group. This is so important. Find people who support you and your children. Find other families that might be going through similar issues. Knowing you are not alone and having support goes a very long way.  People who make life harder for you and your special needs children just aren’t worth it.
  • Don’t worry about what others might do. When it comes to special needs, you might have a lot of choices. Go with your gut here. What works for one kid with autism might not work for another. Talk to your doctors, therapists, school and your spouse to figure out what is best for YOUR child. If you feel your kid has a certain issue and people tell you not to worry but you can’t let it go, get it checked out anyway. I really think Moms know if something is going on with their children. Don’t doubt yourself.

Are you raising special needs children too? What would you add to this list?

Share this:

  • Tweet
  • Print

Filed Under: Asperger's, Military Children, Special Needs Tagged With: Special needs

About Julie

Owner of Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life. Writer, reader, coffee drinker. Mom to three boys, wife of a National Guard soldier. Living life in Tennessee.

Previous Post: « Should you move home for a deployment?
Next Post: A trip back in time at the Ft. Defiance Civil War park and interpretive center »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Barb

    February 13, 2013 at 11:19 am

    You have some wonderful pointers here. The two that helped me raise my children were two that my Mom shared with me: 1- pick your battles, which always kept me from going insane, kept me focused, cut down the frustration for me and for my children. The second pointer was take time for yourself. We need to do that on a daily basis, but for sure want to make certain we’re doing it if we have a special needs child. I forgot that second one while taking care of my sweet Johnny, but am doing my best to nurture myself now. Thanks so much for taking time to leave a comment in My Johnny blog.
    Have an awesome day.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Primary Sidebar

Top Posts!!!

  • The Night Before They Deploy
  • When They First Leave: Tips for Starting a Deployment
  • 14 Tips to Help You Survive Basic Training When Your Spouse Joins the Military
  • Living in Rota, Spain
  • We Are Military Spouses
  • Why You Should Break Up With Your Military Boyfriend

About Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life

Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Welcome to Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life! I am so glad you are here.

My name is Julie and I have been a military spouse for 16 years!

My husband of 19 years has served in the active-duty Army and now the Army National Guard. We have lived in Germany & Tennessee during our time as a military family.

We have three boys and have been through four deployments together.

I hope that you can find support for your own deployments, PCS moves, or anything else military life brings you 🙂

~Contact Me~
Military Life Products
Favorite Books!

Sign up for your FREE Guide to the First 30 Days of Deployment!


Thank you!

Check your email for confirmation! 

.
Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy

Footer

Archives

Copyright © 2022 Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life on the Foodie Pro Theme

We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies.
Cookie settingsACCEPT
Manage consent

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
CookieDurationDescription
cookielawinfo-checbox-analytics11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
cookielawinfo-checbox-functional11 monthsThe cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
cookielawinfo-checbox-others11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
viewed_cookie_policy11 monthsThe cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
Functional
Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
Performance
Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
Analytics
Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
Advertisement
Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
Others
Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet.
SAVE & ACCEPT