My latest post, “Best Books for Military Wives” is on Militaryfamily.com. Make sure to check it out 🙂
Military Life
PCSing with a Special Needs Child: Prepare, Plan and Pray!
Since I am on vacation, I will be having a few people guest post about special needs. If you would like to guest post too…please contact me 🙂
PCSing with a Special Needs Child: Prepare, Plan and Pray!
A PCS is a normal part of any military family. It is also a very stressful, hectic and time-consuming process. Add to the mix a child with special needs and it becomes a huge undertaking.
The normal routine is out the window. For most children and moms, this is not a big deal. They are able to transition from the everyday routine of one home into a new one at the next home. However, our children don’t usually fall into that category and thus our children and us are thrown into what I loving call organized chaos.
For my daughter, routine and consistency is paramount to being able to function and cope with her world. Sometimes, it doesn’t work perfectly but most days it makes the difference in her behavior, ability to regulate her own emotions without redirection, handle transitions and adjust to situations with more ease. Blondie has a pretty set schedule that she understands and is comfortable knowing what to expect every day. This, for the most part, makes it easier for us to help her through any changes or surprises that come up. After all, life isn’t scripted and we can’t expect it to go exactly as we plan or hope am I right moms?
Now, I’m beginning to consider “PCS” a four letter word, loll! Having a child that depends on and thrives with schedule, routine and limited distractions is complicated enough and throwing her into a complete routine /environment/location change is a daunting, intimidating thing (and I’m talking about for me). She, of course, is excited to be exploring a new place. I, on the other hand, know that this initial excitement will be replaced with a long list of feelings, anxiety and difficulty with adjustments as well as transition problems. I know we are looking at some level of regression when it comes to her ability or desire to regulate her emotions and behavior without redirection. I fully know to expect more meltdowns and increased need to have things perfect and heightened sensitivity to noise/fabrics/food/temperature, etc. She definitely seems to handle all of this much better when the day is planned and a normal repetitive schedule.
What can we do to make this PCS less hectic?
- Plan:
- PCS Binder: Organize all your PCS documents, housing information, past and future installation information, etc. into one binder. Easily accessible and you can keep it with you at all times.
- School: Collect all current school records, IEPs, letters from teachers, etc. to pass along to the new school. Contact the new school ASAP and start to get to know the school, forward all current school info and ask for any forms that need to be completed for registration.
- Medical: Get a personal copy of all medical records from your current location and make a binder for your child. (PCM, specialists, therapists, etc.). Start to research new providers at the new location. Contact them for info on waiting list, Tricare and other helpful information.
- 2. Prepare:
- You: Research as much as possible about all aspects of new location. Try to have the majority of things in place prior to leaving (get on housing list, reserve temporary housing, have school physicals done, etc.) The less you have to do upon arrival will be a welcome relief.
- Child: Start discussing the PCS as soon as it is official. Plan a goodbye party for your child and their friends. Share information on schools, available activities, sports and more that are available at the new place. Downplay the negatives about moving but always validate and allow your child to share their emotions and thoughts on leaving as well as being “the new kid”. Answer all their questions and share the new installation website with your child. Show pictures and videos so that they know what to expect.
- Trip: Plan for long car or airline trips. Prepare games for the ride, snacks, entertainment and comfort. Don’t rush the trip if you don’t have too. Stopping at dark to rest, eat and relax will be good for EVERYONE.
- 3. Pray: Pray, hope, cross your fingers, etc. Nothing goes perfectly, plan for the unexpected and hope for the best!
Links:
Ms. Mommyhh6 www.msmommyhh6.com
Facebook Page www.facebook.com/msmommyhh6
Twitter www.twitter.com/msmommyhh6
Raven—AKA Ms. MommyHH6—is an Army wife of 10 years, mother of two beautiful little miracle girls, freelance writer, special needs advocate, avid book reader, social media/tech/Apple geek, and aspiring author. The focus on her blog Ms. MommyHH6 is moms, especially military moms, and special needs moms. Awards include “Top 25 Military Mom Blogs 2012 by Circle of Moms” and “Fort Lee Military Spouse of the Year 2013 by Military Spouse Magazine”. Her writing has been featured on Care.com, Military OneSource, Homefront United Network, NextGen MilSpouse, Mom-Spot, Military Special Needs Network, Mom It Forward and more.
Supporting Our Troops: Organizations That Make it Happen
Written by:
Amanda Hughes
Amanda writes for several online sites and shares her views on world news, the environment and technology and how all of these subjects affect financial news in the U.S.
What would you do if you could change the world? Who would you do it for? Very few of us have the money or the power to effect large-scale change, but that shouldn’t stop us from identifying causes near and dear to our hearts and working to further their missions. Entrepreneurs, businesses, politicians and public figures all have some measure of power, be it financial or otherwise, to lend to their most cherished causes. That’s just the case with supporting America’s military forces, their families and our veterans.
Entrepreneurs like Bob Parsons, the founder and chairman of GoDaddy.com, supports military charities because of his time serving with the Marines during Vietnam. In December of 2012, the Bob and Renee Parsons Foundation presented a $2 million check to the Semper Fi Fund. Of that staggering $2 million, half of it was donated by the Bob Parsons Foundation as matching funds.
Tough Mudder, a company that runs the toughest obstacle course in the world a 10 to 12 mile gauntlet set up at locations around the world works to support the Wounded Warrior Project, an apolitical charity to support the warrior, not the war. At the end of 2012 they had raised over $4 million to help soldiers and veterans with mental and physical injuries.
If you’re first lady Michelle Obama, you really do have the power to change the world or at least bring significant attention to issues you’re passionate about. One of the platforms Mrs. Obama has been most vocal on is support for our men and women in uniform. She and second lady Dr. Jill Biden have worked though the Joining Forces initiative to improve quality of life for current soldiers, veterans and military families.
One of the simplest ways to improve quality of life for military families is to help the rest of the nation understand their unique circumstances and needs. Many of our veterans have highly-developed and marketable skills and yet are unable to find employment. Military spouses also often suffer from being underemployed or unable to work in their fields. When a soldier is deployed or reassigned to a new post and must move his or her family across state lines, things tend to get complicated. Imagine the spouse is a nurse. Nurses are in high demand and yet, if the new state of residence doesn’t reciprocate the licensure, how can one get work? For non-military Americans its a problem rarely faced, but the families of those who sacrifice everything to protect our freedom it’s a very real problem.
According to the White House, when Mrs. Obama and Dr. Jill Biden made their pitch to governors in February of this year, only 11 states had legislation on the books supporting military spouse license portability. In just six months the number of states with supportive measures in place more than doubled to 26 states, and the goal is that no military spouse will ever need to leave their profession behind when their family is transferred. Mrs. Obama and Dr. Biden approached governors in February of 2012 to legislate in favor of military spouse license portability. At the time, only 11 states had legislation in place. Within six months, 26 states supported license portability. Military hiring initiative, Joining Forces, aims to see that “no military spouse will ever need to leave their profession behind when their family is transferred.”
Who else out there is helping our servicemen, servicewomen, veterans and military families? We’d love for you to tell us in the comments.
Dealing with Military Disappointment
My latest post at Militaryfamily.com is now up. It is about Dealing with Military Disappointment.
Should you move home for a deployment?
Please check out my newest post, Should you move home for a deployment? It is up at Militaryfamily.com 🙂
Should We Stay or Should We Go
When someone joins the Military, they don’t sign up for 20 years right away. Usually they sign-up for 3-4 years and then re-enlist every 3-4 years for a while. They do eventually get to a point where they can re-enlist indefinite. But until that time they really do get a choice about if the Military is in their future or not. When my husband re-joined the Military in 2005, we told ourselves we would try it for three years and see how it goes. Despite a long 15 month deployment, my husband re-enlisted for 5 years in the Spring of 2009. We felt it was the right thing to do at the time.
Now we are getting closer to him having to make a decision about his future in the Army and we are finding it is not an easy decision to make. There are a lot of factors to consider. For one, can we as a family really keep going through deployments like we have been? This every year or even every other year thing is not good. It is possible that things will die down a bit and he won’t have to go as often in the future but I am not holding my breath.
We have our son to think about. How will Drew handle future deployments? How will I be able to stay strong acting as a single parent? The one thing that I felt during JRTC was that I need the support of my husband in dealing with our son. I can get all the outside support but when it comes down to it I need him. If he is overseas and I don’t really have much of a chance to communicate regularly with him, how will I be able to handle that? Would years of going through that tear me down?
Then there is the money issue. The Military is a steady paycheck with healthcare. My husband didn’t go to college and doesn’t really have another career waiting for him. He is in the Infantry and that is where he has all his training in. Should we give all that up to figure something else out? Ideally I would make a full-time income from home. That is the ideal and what I am working for. But what if I can’t do it? What if I fail at it? It would be a huge change for our family. For the past 8 years I have been the one to be in charge of the kids, the meals and the house. Right now it seems ideal but what if it really isn’t? What if having him home so much and having him take over everything I have been in charge of for years throws us for a loop?
There is so much to think about. So many pluses and minus on either side. I don’t want my husband to be in harm’s way. I don’t want him missing parts of my children’s childhood but what if staying in the Army is the best choice for him?
Have you been unsure about your future as a Military family?
Hire Me
Are you looking for blog writers to contribute to your blog or website?
I offer blog writing services that will help you achieve your blogging goals.
I have been blogging regularly since 2009 and have contributed posts to sites such as Mymilitarylife.com, Bravotangotees.com and Lifetime Moms as well as guest posting on many other blogs. I currently own and write regularly at Solider’s Wife, Crazy Life and The How to Make Money Online Mom. I also write content for Militaryfamily.com.
I love to write and can do so about my life as an Army wife, a mom of boys, a mom of special needs children, blogging, photography and direct sales as well as many other topics.
Here are some examples of my work:
Army Life & Deployments
- I Might Be Deployed Then
- 3 Tips to stay sane while he is gone
- Benefits of a Deployment
- Pcsing with Children
Special Needs
- Honestly, This is Hard
- Asperger’s and Kindergarten
Blogging & Social Media
- Why You Should Schedule Your Tweets
- 5 Quick Tips to Help you on your blogging journey
- Is it really about good content?
- The importance of blog commenting
- Driving Traffic to your blog
Get in Touch
If you would like to hire me to write for your blog, please send me an email at julie (at) soldierwifecrazylife (dot) com. I would love to chat with you about it. You can also check out my media kit for more information about my site.