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You are here: Home / Military Life / To the Seasoned Military Spouse

To the Seasoned Military Spouse

January 29, 2019 by Julie 1 Comment

You have done this before, deployments aren’t a new thing, and you feel like you have to be strong, for all the new military spouses around you.

To the Seasoned Military Spouse

But the reality is, after the FRG meeting is over, after you get home and crawl into bed, your heart still worries over this upcoming deployment. You wonder how you will get through another nine months apart. You wonder if this will be the deployment something bad happens, how many times can someone go over there and come back the same?

The truth is, you might be a seasoned spouse, you might have advice to offer and you have defeinetly been there before, but you are also a human being.

You have the right to miss your spouse too.

You have the right to not have all the answers.

You have the right to be the one that needs the shoulder to cry on instead of the other way around.

Because no matter how long you have been a military spouse, no matter how long you have lived a military life, you might never be fully prepared for your own emotions during the difficult parts.

As a seasoned spouse, you know that you can’t spend the whole deployment complaining, but it is okay to share with your close friends that you are having a hard time.

As a seasoned spouse, you probably look back on everything you have been through and wonder how you got to where you are today. You remember when you were the brand new spouse, walking onto your very first military installation, unsure of what the future held.

As a seasoned spouse, you know you can help other military spouses and sharing your personal story can help them more than you might realize.

I know for myself, I have always looked at those who have been doing this longer than I have, and have been able to learn what worked for them, and even what didn’t.

There is this idea that in order to support your military service member you have to appear as an unmoveable tower of strength. And maybe you don’t always feel like you are. Maybe you too need some encouragement.

So, to the seasoned military spouse, know that you have a lot to offer but you can also be the one asking for help. You can be the one that needs to vent, and you can be the one that just needs a night off from the stress.

The military changes over time and what things were like in 1999 were different than in 2009 and different even more here in 2019.

You might start to feel that what worked for you 10 years ago won’t work again now, and maybe that is true. However, you are resilient and you will find ways to cope, even if this new age of the military.

Be kind to yourself, take breaks when you can, and know that you can get through this too. Learn your strengths and be aware of your weaknesses. Reach out to others for help, and help those around you that might need that little extra support.

How long have you been a military spouse? Are you new or are you more seasoned?

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Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: military life, military spouse, military wife

About Julie

Owner of Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life. Writer, reader, coffee drinker. Mom to three boys, wife of a National Guard soldier. Living life in Tennessee.

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  1. You Always Remember Your First Military Home says:
    November 1, 2019 at 10:01 am

    […] military spouses, you will probably live in many different homes. I know some seasoned spouses who, at retirement, have lived in 20-30 different places. But, I think, no matter how many times […]

    Reply

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About Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life

Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Welcome to Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life! I am so glad you are here.

My name is Julie and I have been an Army wife for almost 15 years now.

My husband of 18 years has served in the active-duty Army and now the Army National Guard. We have lived in Germany & Tennessee during our time as a military family.

We have three boys and have been through four deployments together.

I hope that you can find support for your own deployments, pcs moves, or anything else military life brings you 🙂

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