Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Julie

What I Would Change About the Military

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What I Would Change About the Military

 

If only I had a magic wand. I would change a lot of things. I would use it to fold laundry and keep the living room looking amazing. I would also use it on the Military. I would want to change a few things to make it a little easier on the families while still allowing the service member to do their job. I have often felt that there were quite a few times in my Military spouse journey when things could be done differently and still allow for the Military to stay strong and do what it needed to do.

1) Change deployment rotations. I can only speak on the Army here, I know other branches have other time tables. I would make it so that you had to be home for at least as long as you were deployed for. And by home, I mean working at your local Military post, not spending months in training. After someone had been home for that amount of time, training could start up again. I remember when deployments were 12 months they talked about a system where the soldier came home for a year and then the next year would be when they would train or go to schools before deploying again. Makes sense to me.

2) Survey the family about moving or staying put. Now I know sometimes a family HAS to PCS because of career classes or changing their MOS. What I am talking about is people who are PCSing who don’t want to. Why would this be a good thing? For one thing, it would save the Military money by not moving people as often. It would also help with morale. This would be even more important overseas. Why spend money moving a family back to the US and another overseas when neither one wants to move?

3) Deployments hold more weight when it comes to promotion. I could never understand why deployments don’t count for more when it comes to promoting someone. Isn’t that what they are trained to do? Isn’t actually deploying worth a whole lot in experience?

4) Weight limits based more on family size then rank. Now I get it, we want to reward those that are higher up in the Military but it seems like if you have a big family and you are lower ranking, moving could cost you a lot of money going over weight. More people usually means more household goods. From beds, to dressers to books, to toys to sports equipment.

5) Remember that a lot of spouses are solo parenting. There have been so many times when I heard about a policy on post which leaves me going, “huh?” because it doesn’t make a lot of sense for a place where a lot of people are solo parenting. It isn’t always possible to find a babysitter for your kids, especially when you are new to a duty station and don’t know anyone yet. They have a policy here about OB appointments where you can’t bring your other children to an appointment under ANY circumstances. Now I get it, they probably made this policy because people were bringing their kids and they were not behaving the way they should. But all this policy does is make spouses freak out more than they need to. There has to be a better way. I normally don’t bring my kids to appointments if I can help it but sometimes I had to and I was glad that the places I had to go understood that.

 

What would you change? Is there something you wanted the Military to change and then they did???

Michael W. Smith’s New Music Video and CD Giveaway

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I have been a fan of Michael W. Smith’s music for a very long time. That is why I was excited to hear about his latest album, Sovereign!

Here is his brand new video for the song Sky Spills Over, one of the songs from the album.

“I’m really passionate about the song SKY SPILLS OVER. It was fun creating it in the studio and I’ve been overwhelmed at the response it gets when we perform it live every night. My son Ryan is a really talented filmmaker so I always enjoy working with him on a project. But what made this project even more special was that 3 of my own grandkids were in the video. This video was a lot of fun to make. I hope people enjoy it!” Michael W. Smith

Want to win a copy of his newest album? Just enter the Rafflecopter below…

a Rafflecopter giveaway

“Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”): Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.

Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway. If you have won a prize from our sponsor Propeller / FlyBy Promotions in the last 30 days, you are not eligible to win. Or if you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.”

Finding New Roads Through the Military Spouse Blogging Community

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Military Spouse Blogging

 

Over the last several years I have been inspired by the Military Spouse Blogging Community. Through their words, their thoughts and their boldness I have learned more about myself as well as the Military and the community that stands behind it. Through these bloggers I have been able to help find new roads, even ones I never expected to find.

They have gotten me to think about certain things I never would have and have caused me to grow as a person and as a Military spouse.

As a blogger myself, I know what goes into creating a blog post. In most cases, the words are from the heart. They are meant to help others, to let them know they are not alone in their struggles, to help their readers see that they too can get through anything. To let them know that they are not alone.

If you are getting ready to go through a deployment, you can find strength through posts about others who have done the same. You can see that it is completely normal to cry your eyes out when you hear the news of an upcoming deployment only to not shed a tear when it is time to say goodbye. That it is normal to want to stay in bed for days after they leave and that once you do emerge into the world, you find strength that you never knew that you had. That it is okay to not always be happy about it and that finding comfort with other spouses is one of the best ways to get through it.

If you are getting ready for a PCS, you can find posts about what you need to do to prepare. You can find posts about your new duty station and get excited about what to expect. You can also find groups so you can start meeting new people even before you get there. You can read about what can go wrong, like the movers loosing something and then you can find out what to do about it. You can see that it is okay to be sad about leaving your current home and that it is normal to fear that you will never make good friends again.

If your husband is separating from the Military for any reason you can read about those transitions. You can find out more about how retirement pay works and what healthcare will look like from now on. You can read about what happens during the medboard process and realize your fears about after Army life are totally expected and normal. You can see that life can go on and that although it might take a while, there can be exciting new roads after Military careers are over.

Whatever it is you are going through in your Military family journey, someone has probably written about it. You can take comfort in their words and gain new understanding about what you might have to go through. The Military Spouse blogging world is a blessing to everyone that needs that little bit of encouragement.

I know it has been such a huge part of my life and I am thankful for every blogger I have come across. You can find some amazing posts on this Pinterest Board and link to Milspouse Bloggers in the community:

Follow Military Spouse Bloggers/MSB New Media’s board Written by Military Spouses on Pinterest.

When it comes to finding new roads, you need all the support you can get. That is why I am happy to talk about the #ChevySalutes program and how it can help those in the Military. Chevrolet is proud to give back to the men and women who serve our country by offering discounts, employing veterans and retirees and offering special programs to those in transition from the Military to civilian life.

Come join me and MSB New media for a Twitter Chat on May 27th, 2015 at 9pm Eastern time. Hashtag #ChevySalutes.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Chevrolet via MSB New Media. The opinions and text are all mine.

How To Work From Home During The Summer

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How To Work From Home During The Summer

Working from home is great, especially since all three of mine are in school most days. My youngest only goes three times a week but I still have chunks of time to get things done. But…as of tomorrow we will be on summer break and all of that changes.

I am starting to panic a little about how our summer will go. How will I get all my work done and still spend pleanty of time to allow my kids to have a fun summer? It’s a challenge for sure. I can’t afford to hire a babysitter or put them in daycare at this time.

Until Mid August it will be me and the boys. There is summer camp, day camp, swim lessons and a few other random things we have scheduled. On days when we don’t have a lot to do I want to go to the pool, the park, the library, $1 movies or just something fun and summer like.

So how do I get my work done? How do I find time to still do what I normally do during the school year?

Here is my plan:

  • Waking up early, before the boys. Based on spring break, my boys will probably go to sleep around 9-10 and wake up around 7-8. Mornings are pretty simple IF we don’t have to rush out of the house first thing. I think there are only a couple of weeks where we will have to be somewhere by 9. Even that is later than the school year. So I will get up early, work for a few hours while they sleep and slowly get up.
  • Less tv, working at night. I love my tv but that is time I could work especially during the summer. I can stay up a little later after the boys go to bed, we will see how this works out.
  • Using my Smart Phone. I can do a lot of my phone. I can even blog on it using Google Docs. I have found that when I do this I even write a little faster for some reason. My kids can be playing at a park and I can be writing my posts. It’s perfect.
  • Write everything down. If I don’t write it down, I will forget it 9 times out of 10. Even if I tell myself not to. Making lists of what I need to get done each and everyday goes a long way. I literally have to schedule everything, even downtime but that is how I can get it done.
  • Taking breaks. I don’t want to work 24/7 this summer. I couldn’t really enjoy the time with my family if I did. I think it will be important to stay on a regular schedule but also take time off, especially when my husband is off work. He won’t have very many days to spend with us but we plan to take advantage of the ones he does. And on those days I probably won’t be working at all.

What about you? Do you struggle with working from home during the summer? I know some bloggers take the summer off but I just can’t do that. What tips would you add to this list?

When You See A Child Throwing A Fit

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When You See A Child Throwing A Fit

 

When You See A Child Throwing A Fit

The other day there was a video being posted online about a boy throwing a tantrum in the car. Although I thought it was a little odd that they were filming and not pulling the car over, I felt sympathy for the kind of fit the kid was having.

It was the kind of fit I am familiar with.

It was just like an autistic fit.

Maybe it wasn’t. Maybe the kid had no behavioral issues and was just acting like that to get his way. But maybe not.

But the thing that really struck me was the comments people were making about the kid. About if he were their son his “butt would be beat” or how their own child never would have been allowed to act that way. It gave me insight into what people could be thinking if I was out in public when my son was having a similar fit.

But it also made me feel like people just don’t get it. That they don’t understand what it is like to have a child like that.

I know for me that anytime I am anywhere and see a child with a similar fit my thoughts immediately think there is some type of special needs going on. That is based on my own experiences and what I have had to deal with.

I know that others don’t think that way and have their own opinions about the subject.

As a special needs mom I have learned to ignore a lot about what people say concerning my child. There is ignorance out there and there is acceptance. I try to surround myself with people who get it and who are not going to judge.

I really do wish that instead of assuming a child needs harsher discipline that people would take a step back and remember that most moms are doing their best and there are certain issues that some children have that cause them to act in certain ways.

That although it might not seem like it, that child could be improving. That they used to throw 5 fits a day and now they are down to 3.

That the mom was up all night because the same child doesn’t sleep and gave in when she really probably shouldn’t have. Because that happens sometimes.

That the day was going really well until something small set the child off and their parents are still learning how to handle what is happening to their son.

That the parents are still trying to wrap their minds around a diagnosis that they never saw coming.

That the fit you see is not quite as loud and harsh as it used to be and that the parents are thankful for that.

That the parents are working with professionals about how to figure out what to do next with their child.

There are so many reasons why that child is throwing a fit at the moment. You just never know what someone else could be dealing with. Give them the benefit of the doubt, offer help if it makes sense to and just be a bigger person then one that assumes they know what is best for someone else’s child.

All of us special needs moms will with thank you for it.

Sunday Weekly Blog Post Wrap Up {4}

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Sunday weekly Blog Post Wrap Up

 

Every Sunday I will be highlighting my own posts and the great posts I found this past week out in blog land 🙂

 

It’s time for another Sunday Weekly Blog Post Wrap Up!

 

 

Here is what I wrote about this week:

 

Here were my favorite posts this week from around the internet:

 

What are your favorites from this week???

Finding New Roads After Military Life

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It’s been almost a year since my husband got out of the Army. It’s been challenging to figure out what we are supposed to do and what the future is going to be for us. We have made a few mistakes along the way and still trying to figure out what needs to happen. After you have been in the Military for a while, you start to take things for granted. Regular paychecks on the 1st and 15th, free Tricare, being a part of the community. When you get out, all of that changes and you have to work on finding new roads.

For us, we needed to figure out what my husband was going to do for a job. In the Army he was in the Infantry and that doesn’t always lead to an equivalent job after the Military. We had to figure out what I would do for a job as I knew I would need to start making more money. We would have to figure out health care which we did by having my husband join the National Guard. There are just a lot of things you have to take care of before they leave the Military.

By working together and keeping the line of communication open, we were able to come up with a basic plan for after he left the Army. Although we are still working on how we want things to be, it has been very helpful to be on the same page. We don’t have expectations that only one of us agrees with. We are both walking the road together.

I know that it might take a few years to get everything the way we want it to be. Change can sometimes take a lot of time. Looking back at everything we have been through the last few years, I know we can find our way to a new future.  My husband is also getting used to not being in the Army everyday anymore. It is quite a change to go from that to a Civilian employer.

Speaking of finding new roads, I think no matter where you are in the Military journey, you will always be finding a new way to go. From PCS orders to deployments, there is always something changing and you just have to adapt to your new normal in one way or another.

Chevy Salutes is an amazing program that helps support the Military. It is an awareness and engagement campaign. During the month of May, which is Military Appreciation Month, Chevrolet will be highlighting how america’s Military service members and their families are finding new roads during and after Military service.

Did you know that…?

  • GM employs nearly 5,000 Veterans and has close to 45,000 current retirees working for them.
  • In July of 2014, GM worked with the U.S. Army and Raytheon Company announced the Shifting Gears Automotive Technician Training program. This program provides eligible transitioning Army soldiers with skills to become service technicians at GM dealerships after they return to Civilian life.

You should also take part in this fun Instagram contest with #ChevySalutes & #FindNewRoads. Take a photo of you and your Military family finding new roads. Make sure to tag @msbnewmedia and use #ChevySalutes #FindNewRoads as your hashtags. You have until May 17th to enter!

chevy military discount

 

 

How have you and your family found new roads???

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Chevrolet via MSB New Media. The opinions and text are all mine.