Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

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7 Reasons Why I Love Having Friends Whose Husbands Are In The Military

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Army Wife Friends

Friends!!! We all need them and it has been such a great thing to have been able to make friends with so many other Military wives over the years. They have helped me to see that I am not alone and that other wives have gone through similar situations over the years. They can be a huge support on a bad deployment day or a great way to get out and have some fun together without the kids. Thanks to Facebook I have been able to stay in touch with so many of them over the years.

Having other Military spouse friends are a huge benefit to Military life. This is why…

1) They understand what it is like to have a husband away for long periods of time. They get it. One to two days away is nothing. They understand what it is like to be the only adult in the house for a period of time.

2) They understand what it is like to be both mom and dad for long periods of time. They get the solo parenting and how hard it can be. It isn’t easy and it is nice to be able to vent to others about it that truly understand.

3) They get how the military is. That sometimes what we think might happen will change at the last-minute and we have to be ok with that. That we can’t plan. That we have to wait and wait and wait.

4) When we are having bad days, they might be having good ones but can remember what the bad days are like and can encourage us. When it is reversed, we can step in and be the shoulder for them to cry on instead.

5) We can spend the holidays together if we are both going to be without our husbands. We can make fun plans with our kids on the weekends when the rest of the world is having family time. This is great because it can be hard to be the only one without a spouse on the weekend or over the holidays. Knowing you can spend it with someone else can really make life a little bit easier.

6) We can vent about all the ways the army is annoying us and they get it and probably vented about those things as well. We can get annoyed that our husband is going to miss another birthday and they get it. We can get mad about housing and they have been there.

7) Because we move around a lot, there is always the chance of running into an old friend or a friend of a friend at any new place we might go to. The Army world is small and the infantry world is even smaller. I love seeing new friends again and knowing that because we live by an Army post, there is always a chance that an old friend might move here someday too.

The Military spouse community truly is a sisterhood. From those you meet locally to the Military Spouse blogger community. We support each other and help each other make it through.

What would you add to this list?

Faith Deployed: Review & Giveaway

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Faith Deployed Book

I love this book! I know I have mentioned the book before but the author, Jocelyn Green recently asked me to write a review. I will also be hosting a giveaway of this book!

The book is made up of little devotionals for those going through a deployment. Right after my husband deployed last year I saw this book at our PX. I just had to have it. As a Christian and a military spouse, I knew this book was written for someone in my situation.

The book itself is divided into sections. This is great so that if something specific is on your heart, you can look up devotionals under that topic. The different sections are:

Taking Every Thought Captive: Training Our Minds to a Biblical Perspective

Guarding the Heart: Protecting Ourselves from the World’s Temptations

Ambassadors for Christ: Viewing our Role as a Ministry

Taking Orders: Living the Life that has been Set Before Us

Total Surrender: Giving Up our Attempts to be in Control

The Price of Duty: Overcoming the Trials Inherent in Serving

Active Duty Faith: Leaning on a Faith that Sustains

Hope of Victory: Recognizing God’s Goodness

The setup of the book makes it very easy to read. You could sit and read several chapters in a row or just take in one at a time. During my husband’s deployment I did try to read at least one devotional a day. Some days I would end up reading two or three of them.

These 14 writers along with Jocelyn Green make up all the devotions in the book:

Pamela Anderson, Sarah Bell, Rebekah Benimoff, Paulette Harris, Jill Hart, Sara Horn, Denise McColl, Lori Mumford, Vanessa Peters, Lasana Ritchie. Sheryl Shearer, Ronda Sturgill, Marshele Carter Waddell and Eathel Weimer.

What is great about all these authors is that they come from all branches of the military, both Active duty and the Reserves. This helps bring perspective and a sense of realness to the devotions. I enjoyed the different tones and experiences that the different writers brought to the book. There were several devotions that I read and thought, “Wow that totally hit home!” Then others I could not relate to as well. The book was also able to address some of the fears I have had or do have about having a husband in the military.

Each little devotion starts with a Bible verse. I love that after each devotion there is a prayer and a question for the reader.

I would say this book is a necessity for anyone who is going through a deployment or military life in general.

Faith Deployed: Daily Encouragement for Military Wives ~ Amazon Link

faithdeployedbutton

Faith Deployed Website

Now for the giveaway! Jocelyn Green has offered to giveaway 1 copy of this book to one of my readers 🙂 The winner will receive the book directly from her.

I will be using Random.org to pick the winner.

All you have to do is leave a comment between now and Friday Jan 22nd at 11:55pm Eastern time.

Good luck!!!

Click here for my full disclose policy!

The Best Time for a Military Family to Have a Baby

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When IS the best time for a military family to have a baby?When IS the best time for a military family to have a baby?

I think this is something that a lot of military wives struggle with. With all these deployments and not much time at home, how do you plan the perfect time to have a baby? Is it better they miss the pregnancy but are there for the birth? What if you plan it perfectly but then deployment orders change? What if it takes longer than you think to get pregnant?

Deciding to have AJ seemed easy. We had been apart for 4.5 months while DW and I were waiting on Command Sponsorship. When we got to Germany we just decided to see what would happen. When Ben left for Iraq we thought that he would be home when the baby was about 3 months old. At the end of the deployment, he was 11 months old. I have several friends that got pregnant on R&R that deployment. They were due about 2 months after the guys were supposed to be home. It was ideal! They would not miss the birth and should be home for most of that first year. But then we got extended and a lot of the dads missed the whole pregnancy and didn’t meet the child until they were a few months old.

You can plan what you can but things always seem to change. When my husband got home in Nov 2007 I knew that I wanted another baby but I knew I did not want one in Germany. I also knew I did not want to go through another deployment in Germany with 3 kids. I know a lot of people do it and I know I could have done it if it was what happened, but I didn’t want to plan for it.

I have talked with a lot of my military wife friends about what would be easier. They miss the birth but then get to enjoy an older baby? They miss the pregnancy but can be there for the birth? They are there through it all but miss the 2nd year? I don’t think there is one right answer.

My husband was with me during the first part of pregnancy. I was sick and tired all the time. I would not look forward to going through that without him. He missed the birth even though they tried to send him home in time. I could do another birth without him but I do not want to. He was there when DW was born and I hate that he missed out on that with AJ. He was gone during the early months of his life which in a way made things easier at night. I didn’t have to worry about waking him up when I had to nurse. But then the extra help is missing too. I also felt like it was harder for him to bond with AJ. He got to see him on R&R; when he was a few weeks old but then didn’t get to see him again until he was almost a toddler. This made bonding with him a lot harder. Not that it hasn’t happened because it has; just it took a lot longer than it would have.

Both deployments left me with a new 2-year-old. Hopefully, that won’t happen again. He hasn’t ever missed the first steps but has missed first words. I think as military wives we know they will miss something. We know other wives have been through it. We know we will get through it. We know it is all a part of the lifestyle. But it still doesn’t make it very easy.

I take a ton of pictures which I know helps but I need to be better about taking videos of the kids. Hopefully the Flip will help with that 🙂

So when is the best time to have a baby in the military? Who knows!!! You just have to decide for yourself and see what happens.