Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Julie

That Breast Pump Might Just Change Your Life

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That Breast Pump Might Just Change Your Life

This is a sponsored post!

When I had my 3rd little boy, my older two were around 4 and 6 years old. And they were active little boys! Having only two hands, adding that third baby was a bit of a balancing act.

I had one boy in elementary school, one in preschool, and a new baby. I remember that I would sit and use my breast pump in my room, having to be plugged in and sitting down to do so. This meant that I had to make sure my other two boys were safe and entertained elsewhere.

My “baby” is now almost 10 years old, and things have gotten even better for breastfeeding moms. For one thing, you can now get a free breast pump from TRICARE.

That’s right! This is a benefit for all military spouses and military moms.

How does it work?

  • TRICARE will give one breast pump out per “birth event.” What is a birth event? Either a pregnancy, or an adoption of an infant with plans to breastfeed.
  • This is true for any TRICARE plan, from active duty to National Guard.
  • You can get your breast pump in a few different ways, including from a civilian stateside or overseas retail store, or an online store.

The Breastfeeding Shop is one of the best places you can go to get your TRICARE benefit breast pump.

In addition to this TRICARE added benefit, there are now more choices when it comes to what breast pump you want to get, including wearable and wireless pumps.

With a wearable breast pump, you can more easily multitask, not be stuck pumping in one location by an outlet, and you can quite literally pump on the go.

Interested in a wearable breast pump? The Breastfeeding Shop can help you out with that.

The Elvie, Freemie, and Willow are popular wearable pumps. Right now, the Breastfeeding Shop has the Elvie and Freemie avaliable. Here are a little about both:

The Freemie- This pump offers hospital power suction, in a hands-free double pump. The pump is small, quiet, and you can wear the pump under your bra. There is a rechargeable battery and has super light cups so you don’t always have to use a bag. This pump would be $0 out-of-pocket with your TRICARE benefit.

The Elvie-This pump is an amazing wearable pump that fits into your bra. The pump is practically silent, includes custom fitting breast shields, and has 7 settings for suction. This pump does have an up-charge as TRICARE doesn’t pay 100% for luxury pumps, however, the Breastfeeding Shop will have the lowest out-of-pocket costs for this type of pump.

The Breastfeeding Shop also carries plenty of other types of pumps if you are not interested in a wearable one. Sometimes it is best to go with a more traditional pump if breastfeeding is new for you and/or this is your first baby.

A wearable pump can be fun and convenient for moms that would like to have that flexibility. However, the wearables are limited with their size flanges available. So if you do need a specific size flange – they might not have it. That is something to keep in mind when making your decision on what type of breast pump you want to get.

If you take a look at the Breastfeeding Shop’s website, you can see they have a comparison chart of the different types of pumps. When you are ready to move forward, you can fill out their online form to get your pump. You will need to have a prescription from a TRICARE-authorized doctor, physician assistant, nurse practitioner, or nurse-midwife.

I love that this is a TRICARE benefit, as I know being able to have access to a breast pump is very helpful for so many moms. Head on over to the Breastfeeding Shop and enjoy your new pump!

Can Anyone Really Make it as a Military Spouse?

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I get commissions for purchases made through some of the links in this post.

Can anyone really be a military spouse? Can anyone who marries someone who serves figure out a way to make this work?

I have often believed that no matter who you are, where you came from, as long as you love your service member, you can get through anything. When my civilian friends tell me they could never do what I do, I want to tell them they could if they had married a service member too.

There have even been times in the past, before my husband joined the military when I didn’t think I could do it either.

When most people get married, they assume they will be married until death do us part. Who wants to go into a marriage with divorce as the goal? But the truth is, not all marriages last, and not all marriages can survive the military.

Can anyone make it as a military spouse? That depends.

Some people can get through anything the military life brings them. This should be the goal. Working through stressful situations, working on their marriage, and trying to figure out a way to get through it all.

Some military spouses married their service member years before they joined up. In these cases, life gets thrown entirely on its head when they join. Everything changes and that can be such an adjustment for the service member, military spouse, and children.

For others, marrying the love of their life meant becoming a military spouse on their wedding day, unsure of the adventures, or struggles they might run into in the future. Their new marriage is thrown together with the newness of military life.

In either case, the military spouse can feel like their world is falling apart, that they can’t make it through that deployment, that they are not quite cut out for this life.

I have felt this way myself. I would get to a place where I just didn’t see how I could keep doing this. Where everything was a little too much. Where I didn’t want to do the military life anymore.

But then, I remembered that I did indeed marry a soldier, even if he wasn’t actively serving at the time. I reminded myself that this is a part of who my husband is and that in the end, I can stand by him through whatever I need to. That my love for him and my want for us to be together will be more important than any lonely night or hardship the military comes my way.

That being said, this isn’t the case for everyone.

For some, this life isn’t something they can keep doing. They hit a wall for whatever reason. Sometimes they hit this wall because there has been betrayal in the marriage. Can you truly trust someone across the miles when they have cheated before? Sometimes there is abuse, or the couple cannot work out their difficulties.

The truth is, we don’t always know what other people are going through, we don’t know what happens in their marriage, and we don’t know what they have been through in the past. Compassion is a must.

While going into this life believing you can make it through is a must, know that if you were not able to, that if things did get too difficult, that if you are no longer a military spouse, that you have a right to do what is best for you.

That you did what you could, and that no one should be judging you for doing what is best for your own family. We are all our own people, and we have to make the choices that work for us.

What do you think? Can anyone make it as a military spouse?

The Best Deals For This National Guard Military Spouse

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The Best Deals For This National Guard Military Spouse

This post contains affiliate links!

Christmas is just around the corner, well almost…and speaking of Christmas, it’s October so I really should be thinking about Christmas shopping.

But…I have TWO boys with birthdays before then to think about too. We definitely have a “birthday season” in this house. My husband starts us off in September, then my three boys have birthdays, then Christmas, then mine in January.

We have cake almost every month so I can’t complain!

But back to Christmas shopping. I wanted to share some of the deals I have found that I find interesting. I will keep this page updated throughout the whole holiday, and in our case, (birthday season).

A few things I will be keeping an eye out for are books, OF COURSE! Legos, video games, stuff for the home, decorations, and comfy clothing. I can not under any circumstances buy another blanket. I have gone blanket crazy the last few months, so we are good there. But maybe some new sheets???

So here you go, here are the best deals for this national guard military spouse. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do:

Amazon

We LOVE Legos in this house and this one will be perfect for my almost 10 year old!

Wondering if you should get a Kindle Paperwhite? YES, you totally should. They are 110% worth it if you want an E-reader. I have had one for years and love them so much. Plus, the newest one is waterproof 🙂

These kits are so much for kids who love science and crafting. I am going to get at least one for my almost 10 year’s birthday!

I’m not saying you need an Instant Pot, but I am saying that if you get one you will probably wonder what took you so long to get one. We use ours all the time, from chicken dishes to rice to hard-boiled eggs. There is so much you can do with an Instant Pot.

Have YOU found any amazing deals lately???

This is Your Military Life

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“I could re-join the Army,” he told me one day. We had been trying to figure out what he should do career-wise. What change he should make.

“Hmm…I don’t know about that,” I told him. “I’m not sure about that, we have a kid now.”

Back then, I couldn’t imagine a reality where I was home with my son and my husband was far away for months at a time. It just didn’t seem real. That type of life didn’t seem possible.

I laugh about that now. I think about all the solo parenting I have done over the years and what I thought was impossible, was very possible.

And that is one of the biggest things about military life. One of the biggest lessons you will learn. That you can do what you thought you couldn’t.

Maybe you will PCS overseas by yourself with a toddler, never having imagined that your first flight to Europe would look like that.

Maybe you will go through your first deployment in a brand new state, one you never thought you would ever visit, let alone live in, so many miles from home.

Maybe you will encounter the most difficult of days, and get through to the other side, wondering where you found the strength.

I strongly believe that through everything you go through as a military spouse, there will be a lesson there. Lessons you might not see right away. Lessons that might take some time to understand.

As hard as the deployments might be, you find ways to get through them. One day at a time.

You find your people, even if that takes longer than you would like. Even if that means having to say goodbye later on. You find people who will become your best friends, and you can go through this life together, even if you are miles away.

Even after 15 years, I still have my super frustrating days with the military. This summer, trips were canceled because of Guard duties. I kept trying to tell myself that this was all apart of this life, but doing that is easier said than done.

In between deployments, with no moves on the horizon, life can be pretty “normal” sometimes. You can get so used to military life just going along with your own life, without too many hiccups.

Your spouse gets home at a regular time, you enjoy the weekends together, and life just goes on. And then…orders come, or you hear rumors of deployments, and you are reminded that this is a military life. That you are a military family.

There is so much deployment advice out there. From staying busy to making friends, to trying not to sweat the small stuff. Sometimes all of that will work, and other times it won’t.

You might find yourself struggling more than everyone else. You might find yourself wondering how you can get through the next week of deployment, let alone the six months you have left. You can find yourself wishing for another type of life.

I get inspired by seasoned spouses. Those who have been doing this even longer than I have. They have so much wisdom for those of us in the weeds.

They have been there, pcsing with small children, back to back deployments, and always having to say goodbye to people they care about.

They have been there and can comfort and support when you are feeling down or unsure how the future will go.

Not everyone’s military journey looks the same. We all will go down different paths. But the military community is here for each other.

While not everyone you meet during this life will be supportive, I assure you most of us will be. We can lend a helping hand or a listening ear. We can tell you what worked for us, and what didn’t. And we can help each other through.

No matter how long you have been a military spouse, no matter how many deployments you have to go through or how many PCS moves you will make, remember, this is your military life.

This is the path you are on and you are stronger than you realize. You might not always feel that way, I certainly don’t, but time will show you that you are. The military life isn’t always easy, but it’s yours. Every step of the way.

How Deployments May Change You For the Better

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How Deployments May Change You For the Better

I have been forever changed by the years my husband has either been deployed or has been away from us. I am a different person because of them.

They are my past and will always impact my future. They have changed the way I parent, how I make friends, and will influence the choices I will make in the future.

Looking back I tend to cringe when I remember all the bad. The hard nights, the sad nights, the rough days, the breakdowns, and all of that. But if I really look into it, I know I have learned and grown as a person because of them. I know that in some ways, deployments have changed me for the better.

Gaining that independence

As much as I hate having to take care of the house all by myself when my husband is gone, as much as I hate having to be the only one making certain decisions, it has made me into a more independent person.

I have had to become one. I had no other choice. This isn’t to say I never feel like I need my husband because I do, just that I know I can do things on my own if I need to. It is a little freeing. And a little scary.

I can sympathize more with others

If I hear someone else is getting ready to send their spouse off to war, I can totally sympathize with that. I can be a listening ear, someone to talk to about the separation, and I truly understand how hard it can be to say goodbye.

I get deployment life and I can help someone else get through it. I have experienced different types of deployments too. I have been through long ones and short ones. Scary ones and more mild ones. I get that part of military life and I can offer support to others who might need it.

I am not going to take my husband for granted

I am not going to wish him away. I am going to enjoy the moments together. I will remember how hard it was to live without him. To spend over a year without him in our home.

I am going to try hard to always remember that. But doing so isn’t always easy. When my husband went away for his two-week training with the National Guard, the time apart felt close to impossible. I really had to give myself a talking to. I have gone so much longer without talking to him, I should be able to handle this.

I am more adaptable

Over the years I have found that what works for me during deployments or time apart, might not work for everyone. Staying busy helps me get through a separation, but that isn’t always an easy thing to do. And for some, just trying to do so is a big struggle.

Everyone’s situation is different so not everything is going to work for every military spouse. I have different needs now in my 40s with older kids than when I went through my first deployment in my 20s with babies.

You live and you learn in this life, and things are always changing. The key is to finding what works for you during your current deployment and always trying to find new ways to get through.

What about you? What have deployments changed about you???

So What Can You Do When Military Life Gets Too Hard?

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Military life is a rollercoaster. You will have your good days and your bad ones. You will have highs and you will have lows. You will be waiting for orders for months and months and then you get them and before you know it you are on a plane headed to your next duty station.

It’s a strange way to live your life, always waiting and then not waiting and hoping and crying and then laughing. Your emotions are all over the place.

When you hit a difficult season of Military life, it can be hard to know what to do. You want to think positively, but doing so is hard. You want to keep busy, but all you really want to do is hide in your bed. You want to remember that this too shall pass but all you see is more lonely nights, more frustrating days, and years of feeling like your life can never be normal again.

So what do you do when you hit this point? What can you do to get out of it?

Find Friends

Find your friends. Maybe you don’t feel like you can see them in person, or maybe they live too far away. You can still connect.

Send a text message, schedule a friend’s Zoom call, or make plans to meet up sometime in the future.

Friends are a must during military life. They can get you through the hard times, and help you make memories together. And they can pull you out when you are feeling like the military is just too much to handle.

Journal Journal Journal

If you don’t already keep a journal, why not start? Pick out a new journal, and just start writing. You can make it the way you want, and just write out your feelings.

The best thing about journaling is that no one can judge what you write. And putting things down on paper can help you get to a better place. A journal is a must during a deployment, or anytime the military is driving you crazy.

Remember the Past

Remember what you have been through before. A long deployment? A move to a place you never wanted to go? And think about how you got through all of that.

When you remember what you have been through, it makes it easier to go through something else in the future. You are strong, and you can look back and see evidence of that. You might just need a reminder.

What CAN You Change

In the end, you have to figure out what YOU can change and what YOU have control over. So many times in military life we as spouses have zero control, but that doesn’t mean we just have to live with everything the way that it is.
What can we do to make things a little bit easier back at home? What changes can we make to our daily schedules? Once you start looking at what you can change, and work on those things, it makes it a little easier to accept the things you can’t.

Have you ever felt like Military life was a little too much at times? What have you done to get through it?

Treat Yourself With a FabFitFun Box This Fall

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I received a free box for review from FabFitFun! This post also contains an affiliate code.

As military spouses, sometimes we don’t take the time for ourselves. We simply have too much to do. But self-care is so very important, even if we have to find it in little ways. With a spouse in the military, it isn’t always easy to get away from the house or get away for a long break.

We have to find ways to get that self-care in our homes, oftentimes while solo parenting, while our spouse is away. A monthly or quarterly box can be a great way to help with that.

You sign up, and then the box comes in the mail, as a true treat for yourself. While it might not seem like a big deal, finding little things to help with your self-care goals is important, whether it is a new lotion to try, something for your kitchen, or a new handbag.

What is FabFitFun?

FabFitFun is a seasonal subscription box with full-size fashion, beauty, fitness, and lifestyle products. Their mission is to deliver happiness to everyone everywhere and is available in the US, Canada, and the UK.

What I love about the box?

I love getting things in the mail, so when I see that FabFitFun box on my doorstep I get super excited! My favorite items are probably those that I have thought about getting, have used something similar in the past, or didn’t even know I would want but end up loving. One of my favorite products was something I got in my very first box, a salt and pepper grinder where you could put salt on one side and pepper in the other. We use it every day!

With the different beauty products, I love finding something new I have never tried before. The makeup products can be fun and they often send you some yummy smelling lotions or other types of creams.

Beyond the products, I also love that FabFitFun is dedicated to supporting female entrepreneurs. Many of the products in each box are from female-founded companies.

I also like that you can pick and choose some of the items in your box. At the same time, I also like how other items are curated by their team of experts, so there is always a little bit of a surprise. It’s like receiving a gift from someone!

What is the value of the products in a FabFitFun box?

The box is valued at over $200, and costs, $49 per season, but you would pay $39.99 if you use my code-“LITTLEHOUSE” 🙂 Some of the products in the box are worth more than you would pay for the WHOLE box. Pretty cool huh? And you aren’t just getting sample sizes either, which is so nice.

Treat Yourself With a FabFitFun Box This Fall

Here is a breakdown of the FabFitFun fall box I just received for review:

  • Botkier New York Trigger Backpack-$100
  • Nectar Sunglasses Blue Light Blocking Glasses in Brown Tortoise-$45
  • NCLA So Rich Cuticle Oil in Horchata-$18
  • The Laundress New York Crease Release- $16
  • Anastasia Beverly Hills Clear Brow Gel-$22
  • The Beauty Crop Glow Milk in Blind Date-$19.50
  • Hythe Tranquility Sleep Mist-$22
  • Volition Beauty Celery Green Cream-$55

Initiatives and Fall Theme:

This fall, FabFitFun’s theme is “Gather the Good” which is about finding new ways to maintain old traditions and also create new ones. It is also about embracing people that we love.

FabFitFun’s charity partner is: No Kid Hungry. They are proud to partner with them this season ensuring that kids get three healthy meals a day during this current crisis and beyond. So far, No Kid Hungry has sent more than $19 million in emergency grants to 876 schools and community groups. They help serve more than 13 million meals a day. FabFitFun will be accepting donations from its members who can donate in the Fall Add-Ons and Edit Sales.

How to order

To order your own FabFitFun Box, head on over to https://fabfitfun.com/ and use my code, “LITTLEHOUSE” for $10 off! FabFitFun can be a great way to treat yourself during a deployment, or even when your spouse is home. Filled with fun products to try and enjoy 🙂

Bloom Where You Are Stationed During a Pandemic

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Bloom Where You Are Stationed During a Pandemic

Even though some people’s orders have been delayed because of the pandemic, others are still moving or pcsing.

While it is a good thing military families can move on to the next step, it can be difficult when you are doing so during this time.

While you normally could be looking forward to getting to know your new community and for your kids to start at a new school to make friends, you feel like all of that might be on hold.

You want to get out and explore but how much can you really do right now? How can you figure out how to bloom where you are stationed if you can’t do what you normally do to get to know a new place?

Even if you aren’t new to your current duty station you may be feeling a bit restricted.

Your friend circle could have moved earlier this year and while you assumed you would get right back out there to make some new friends, COVID hit.

You may be awaiting orders to move somewhere new but they are delayed and you want to figure out how to enjoy the next six months at a place you are not too excited about.

Blooming where you are stationed doesn’t always come easy. Some places will be easier to love than others. But there is probably something good about anywhere you have to live, even if you have to hunt for it.

What can you do?

So what can you do? What is open and where do you feel comfortable exploring? This is going to differ for everyone and will depend on where you live.

Still…see what you can do. Use safety measures and make sure to follow the local regulations.

Accept the temporary setup

Okay I know it is hard but you might need to just accept things are not going to be the way you were hoping they would be. I know this is so hard because in some ways it feels like this is going to last forever.

Your kids might not be able to get out there and make new friends right away, but could they have a weekly Zoom call with friends they already know?

You won’t be able to introduce yourself to the moms in line at school pick up but can you say hi to a neighbor or talk over the fence on a regular basis?

You might not be able to attend all the fun events that normally go on in your community but you might be able to attend a social distancing event of some kind. Our local community still has a farmer’s market going on and there are other options to get out and explore part of the community.

Explore online

There is so much going on online these days. From virtual events to Bible Studies. From book clubs, to even concerts.

Check and see what your local communities might be doing and join an online event. This might feel different and weird but it could be a good way to learn about what is happening in your new community and you might even find ways to connect with others.

2020 is the worst but don’t let this year stop you from figuring out how to bloom where you are currently stationed. It might take some work but in the end, it will make life a little easier right now. And hopefully, 2021 will be an amazing year to see everything and explore the way you really want to.