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Military Life

Top 25 annoying Army Deployment Questions and Comments

June 19, 2011 by Julie 4 Comments

Stephanie has offered a guest post to me 🙂  She blogs over at Mama Clementine!  She is a SAHM of four, been an Army Wife for 11 years and been through five deployments.  Thanks so much for the post Stephanie!

Top 25 annoying Army Deployment Questions and Comments

 

annoying Army Deployment Questions
Rakkasan  Deployment 2007
Matthew 11, Dylan 7, Lauren 5 

This morning I was reading a post over at Caffeinated Catholic Mamaof how people have lost all sense of personal-space and privacy, either because of our over sharing techno culture or maybe just a general lack of manners. She gives her wonderful list of Top annoying and prying questions from absolute strangers, Here.

While writing in her comments I was thinking that for me, being such a Counter-Culture Mama, the lists of random rude questions and offending comments from those that it just does not concern, could go on and on…ad infinitum. So, I thought for fun, I would make a small project out of several lists of obscenely annoying Questions and Comments that I have gotten from strangers, all neatly compiled into categories. 🙂
What follows is a list of my TOP 25 way too personal, yet oh so popular questions and all to common comments, that I have received during my husband’s Deployments.
      1. Oh, is your Husband Deployed ?
      2. Do you Miss Him ?
      3. Is it Hard ?
      4. Will they send Him home for the Birth ?
      5. Is it your Husband’s Baby or Jody’s ?
      6. Does your Husband know you’re pregnant ?
      7. Do you know who the Father is ?
      8. What will you do / How will you have a Baby by yourself ?
      9. Why do you have / keep having kids if he is gonna be gone so much ?
      10. Your children are so young, If he gets killed, they won’t remember him.
      11. Why do you have kids when, He could get killed anytime ?
      12. Your so Lucky you live off the government, the rest of us have to work.
      13. If you didn’t live off the government you wouldn’t be able to afford all those kids.
      14. Maybe your husband will die and you’ll get all that money.
      15. You should take out some more insurance on your husband, because he has a good chance of being killed.
      16. But, just think of all that extra money at Tax time.
      17. I don’t know how you could do that, I could never let my Husband do that.
      18. (My Sister-in-laws fave way of relating to me)…I know just how you feel, my Husband was out of Town, on the road, for two weeks last month !
      19. How can you be Faithful for 15 months ?
    annoying Army Deployment Questions
    Deployment 2003
    Dylan 2yrs

    20. Do you worry about your Husband cheating on you ?

    21.  You don’t think your Husband will wait a whole year do you ?

    22.  Don’t you all just sleep around with each others Husbands anyway ?

    23.  So, has your Husband Killed anybody yet ?

    24.  You could have gotten out / why would he stay in / It’s his fault he is Deploying / So he’s getting out after this right ?

    25.  Using up my time by going on a long rant about how you feel about the war and whether or not we should be “Over-There”

    ….and the  ***** Extra Credit Bonus*****

    So Wow, it is Just like Army Wives on The    T.V. Show

     

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    Filed Under: Deployment, Guest Post, Military Life Tagged With: Deployment, guest post

    Memorial Day Pictures

    May 27, 2011 by Julie 3 Comments

    In May of 2009 my friend T and I had just hit the 6 month point of a year long deployment.  We both wanted to go to the US for the summer and decided to try Space-A.  I got to my in-laws house right before Memorial Day.  We visited a local cemetery that was having an event.  It was emotional to see so many people from the area together to remember those who had lost their lives.

    I think it is very important for all Americans to not just look at Memorial Day as a day to bbq, find a great deal and have a day off.  Those things are great but each and every American must remember the sacrifices that our American military has paid over the years.  I know most Americans do think about this on some level.  How could you not? But it is really important that it is #1 in our minds.  That we remember that our freedoms are not free.  We need to remember that on Monday there are wives, husbands, sons, daughters, moms, dads, sisters, brothers, grandparents and friends missing someone who paid the ultimate price.

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    All these photos were taken at the Santa Rosa Memorial Park in Santa Rosa, CA

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    Filed Under: Military Life

    Joining Forces For Military Families

    April 13, 2011 by Julie Leave a Comment

    America has been involved in two wars for 8+ years now.  Many military families have been through deployment after deployment during this time.  We are two months into our 3rd deployment and I can feel the weight of the last two.  And I know I am not alone in this.  Many other families are going through the same thing.  I am not sure when these rapid deployments will end.  When there can be YEARS between them.  I have been praying this can happen for a long time now and I just have to hope it will.  They tell us we will get two years between deployments now.  But really?  I am not sure I can believe this.  Especially since things are going on in other places in the world besides just Iraq and Afghanistan.  And although I hope for years I am preparing myself.  We just started this deployment and I already have to mentally prepare for a fourth which could happen just a year after he returns from this one.

    I was so happy to see this website  Joining Forces.  This is a national initiative started by the First Lady Michelle Obama and Dr. Jill Biden.

    The website says this, “1% of Americans may be fighting our wars, but we need 100% of Americans to be supporting our troops and their families. Mrs. Obama and Dr. Biden are asking Americans to get involved in any way they can.”

    This needs to happen!  Deployments are not going away.  And the more deployments families go through, the more support we will need.   I hope all of America can help in some way.   While part of our family is off fighting in a war, we need to know that America cares and respects that.  Over the last 5+ years that we have been a military family we have seen such wonderful support from friends and family.  Thank you all so much!  Your support means more than you will ever know.

    So no matter what your political beliefs are, no matter if you support the war or not, check out that site and find a way to help a military family 🙂

     

     

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    Filed Under: Deployment, Military Life Tagged With: military families

    Tour of Duty Preparing Our Hearts for Deployment by Sara Horn

    December 27, 2010 by Julie Leave a Comment

    Tour Of DutyI am excited to share with you a book review of Tour of Duty Preparing Our Hearts for Deployment by Sara Horn.  Since becoming an Army wife in 2005, I am always on the lookout for a good book about our life & how to get through it.  I was excited to see Sara Horn had come out with a new devotional book on deployment.

    Deployments are such a part of our military lives but getting through one can be very difficult sometimes.

    I have been through 2 deployments and I felt like this book touched on so many of the thoughts & feelings I have experienced during the separations.  Included in each chapter are verses, questions and even “Tips for Military Wives.”  I think this book would be an awesome Bible study and would love to do it with a group of ladies someday.

    I also will be rereading this again when we start our next deployment.  There were some parts that I read where I knew it would be very helpful to go back and read during the middle of a deployment.  The chapter called “Facing the Giants” especially as it deals with those what ifs or worries we all seem to go through when our husband is deployed.

    Another thing I really liked about this book is her comparisons to biblical characters and what they have gone through in their lives.  It makes you realize that although our struggles might have looked different, they dealt with a lot of the same emotions we might deal with right now.

    One more small thing, I really really liked the cover of this book.  Something about the pink on the green 🙂

    The book has a Facebook page and you can buy the book from Lifeway 🙂

    I received a free copy of this book from Sara Horn for this review!

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    Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: Book Review, Deployment

    Twas the day after Christmas…

    December 26, 2010 by Julie Leave a Comment

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    Twas the day after Christmas and all through the house…

    Well not quite a poet so I will stop there 😉  I hope you all had a great Christmas 🙂

    PhotobucketOurs was pretty low key.  The boys slept in until 8 am!  I couldn’t believe it.  We did gifts and then they played the rest of the day.  Dinosaurs, Mickey Mouse and Toy Story were the favorites of the day 🙂

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    I didn’t take too many pictures which is not like me but I think I could be getting sick and just wasn’t feeling it.  I ended up taking a 2 hour nap with the baby in the afternoon.

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    I made some London Broil, mashed potatoes & green beans.  It wasn’t too hard to make and was yummy!  We normally always make turkey on Christmas and it was nice to not have to be cooking all day this year.

    Starbucks Socks…FUN!

    Did you have a good day yesterday?

    And remember the Yoga Mat Giveaway ends tomorrow night 🙂

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    Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: christmas

    Bass Pro Shops Santa

    December 18, 2010 by Julie 2 Comments

    A couple of weeks ago we took the boys to the Bass Pro Shops in Nashville to see Santa.  They also had crafts for the kids to do as well as a train and remote control cars.  We waited a very long time to see Santa and ended up being the last family before he took his lunch break.  But in the end it was a lot of fun and I know my 2 older boys really enjoyed themselves.

    Bass Pro Shops
    Bass Pro Shops
    Bass Pro Shops
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    Bass Pro Shops
    Bass Pro Shops

    Have you been able to get out to see

    Santa yet?

    * This post contains affiliate links!

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    Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: christmas

    Guest Post: Stationed in Hawaii

    November 15, 2010 by Julie 1 Comment

     

     

    Stationed in Hawaii with the military

    This next guest poster is Tricia at This Happy Home! I first “met” Tricia on a yahoo mailing list years ago.  I am still hoping we end up at the same post sometime in the future 🙂  She is an Army wife with 3 little kids stationed in Hawaii 🙂  Since they are getting ready to PCS stateside again she will be writing a few other posts on her blog about Hawaii as well.

    Nearly three years after arriving in Hawaii as a disgruntled pregnant army wife who did not want to be here, I’m leaving, with two more kids than we arrived with, a person who is grateful for the experience, enjoyed her time…and wouldn’t fight coming back. Our duty time here has had some amazing highs (one and two) and some definite lows. I came with the attitude that this would be an experience unlike any we would have if we weren’t military, so I was going to take advantage of it.

    Some highlights….

    Stationed in Hawaii

    Keiki should be seen and heard. Everywhere. From church services to high-end restaurnts, normal kid noises and behavior are expected and welcomed. Rare is the “evil eye” from someone when your adorable keiki peeps up in the middle of service to tell you he needs to visit the men’s room or has the wiggles at dinner. You’ll find that Hawaii is one of the most family-friendly places you can be stationed.

    The kama’aina are amazing. I have never felt anything but welcomed by the locals. You’ll hear stories about how much the locals hate non-natives, particularly military, but I have never had a single occurrence. And I have spent quite a bit more time in the local communities than most military wives I know. They are friendly, warm, welcoming and helpful. They have a rich history in the islands and they love to share their history and culture. And food!

    If you enjoy Asian food, you’re in luck! Hawaii is rich with cultures from all over Asia and the Pacific Islands and, with that, comes incredible foods. From hole-in-the-walls to chains like Zippy’s and L&L Drive In, you’ll never have to search hard for good food.

    Where else can you be stationed and have the opportunity to be treated at a big pink hospital?! Tripler Army Medical Center is huge and, because it sits on the side of a mountain, it can easily be seen from many places. And the pink-ness of it makes me smile every time. Add in that I birthed both of my boys there and I have even more reason to smile at Tripler.

    One of the greatest things about being here, I think, is the ability to easily travel to the other islands. Airfare is very cheap, with prices starting around $40 roundtrip, rental car deals can be found utilizing Priceline and many hotels offer military rates. In a matter of a couple of hours, you can drive to the airport, fly to your destination and be on an island far different from Oahu. Take advantage of this opportunity!! I’ve known several military wives who have vowed never to travel to the other islands…I can’t tell you how much they’re missing out on!

    Stationed in Hawaii

    I’d gladly be stationed here again just went for the shave ice (call it shaved ice and they’ll know you aren’t local!)!! Our favorites are Waiola when we’re in town and Matsumoto’s when we’re on the North Shore.

    Its Aloha Friday, No Work ‘Till Monday In addition to the incredibly catchy tune that you’ll hear all over the radio on Fridays, the aloha spirit comes out on Fridays. Everyone moves a little slower, is a little more friendly and spirits are up. I recently learned that Aloha Fridays were the inspiration behind “casual Fridays” you find on the mainland…and that Aloha Fridays were started to encourage wearing of Aloha shirts!

     

    Stationed in Hawaii

     

    Need I go on?! 🙂 As much as I am not a beach lover, wow…we have some amazingly beautiful beaches!!

    Stationed in Hawaii

    And beautiful beach sunsets!

    And the struggles…

    With prices so much higher off base than on base, you’re “bound” to the bases for shopping. While shopping at Target and such is high, it is quite doable. Shopping for groceries? No way! Sale prices can often be decent but non-sale items have prices that are quite prohibitive for regular shopping.

    Getting around can be highly irritating some days. Between the traffic at rush hours, the high number of cars on Oahu, the parking spaces made for tiny sedans (which are a rarity!) and the lack of signage (it’s not unusual to be looking for someplace and somehow stumble upon it…without ever having seen a sign for it anywhere).

    If you want to eat ethnic food that is not Asian, good luck! Outside of a few restaurants, we’ve found very little good non-Asian/local ethnic food. Tex-Mex is especially hard to find. Pizza places that are not chains are also few in number. And delivery food? Even less!

    I knew it would be hard for me to live someplace with very little weather change from season to season. Growing up in the Midwest, I was used to four very distinct seasons. When I read in the guide-book that average temperatures were 80 plus or minus five degrees, reality hit. Seasons really were NOT going to be different in any significant way (save for rain during winter months if it wasn’t a dry year, which it was last year). This fall, for the first time, I noticed a very, very subtle change in weather–the winds were a little cooler, mornings and evenings were slightly chilly. If you weren’t paying close attention, though, it would be easy to miss. I miss different seasons but, more than that, I miss the CHANGE of seasons. I miss those early spring days when it’s just warm enough to go without a jacket, to crack the windows in your house or car. I miss leaves turning colors, the hint of crisp breezes, watching the stores for fresh apple cider and cinnamon brooms. I miss guessing whether early winter precipitation is rain or spitting snow. Every day the same (plus or minus five degrees!!) can be a hard adjustment.

    Stationed in HawaiiI knew the distance from the mainland (and associated travel costs) would be great. I didn’t realize just how great until I was traveling alone with a 3-year-old and 12 week old!! Add in travel costs and travel to the mainland can quickly become quite difficult to make. Even when staying in Hawaii, the difference in time (as zones can make it difficult to connect with family. Six hours behind the east coast (five during the winter) means that friends and family are almost at the end of their workday just as your day is getting started.

    Seemingly minor, it can grow increasingly frustrating when you can’t get online purchases shipped here. eBay sellers who insist custom forms are needed to ship to Hawaii so they won’t sell to you, retailers that only ship via UPS Ground (diapers.com, for example), no Amazon Grocery! And still others ship here…but for very high costs (Target, Frontier & King Arthur Flour, for example). When selections are already limited (groceries & craft supplies), the shipping issues add to the frustration.

    As with any duty station, Hawaii is what you make of it. The struggles can be really trying sometimes…but this is truly an experience you’d (likely) never have if you were not military.

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    Filed Under: Guest Post, Military Life Tagged With: army wife, guest post, pcs

    Guest Post About Christmas Newsletters

    November 8, 2010 by Julie 2 Comments

    Since the time for baby is getting closer and closer, I figured it might be a good idea to have some guest posts. My mind is mostly mush these days and not sure how much blogging I will feel like doing right after he is born.  If you are interested in writing a guest post for my blog, please feel free to email me about it at juliethearmywife@gmail.com

    Today’s post is by writer Tiffany Silverberg.

    Christmas Newsletters

    Growing up as a Coastie brat, I moved every three to four years and ended up with friends all over the globe. Those were the days before blogs so relied on seasonal letters to get visual and written updates from our dear ones. From the time we could read, those holiday letters from friends around the world were precious. We couldn’t wait for the temperatures to drop and our mailbox to fill. My sisters would always rush to the mailbox to see who we would hear from. And we were happiest when those letters contained two things: a picture and a letter.

    *The letters without pictures were informative, but we ached to see how our friends and their siblings had grown. We would even pull out last years’ pictures and compare.

    *The pictures without letters seemed to be missing a caption. Why was the family sitting on top of a mountain? And which mountain? Or why were the all dressed up? The letters filled in the gaps. They answered all our questions. They made us feel connected to our friends, in a world before facebook.

    Even just last year, my husband and I went home for Christmas. Upon our arrival, my mom handed me “the basket.” The wicker vessel containing all the letters we had received. Each had been opened and read at least once by each family member. Now it was my turn. As I pulled out the pictures and read through the letters, my family watched waiting for my reaction to each story. Just as we had always done.

    As a military family, our holiday traditions always included letters that came anytime from Thanksgiving to Valentines Day. Even now, as a Navy wife, my fridge is covered in pictures of dear friends’ Christmas pictures. I can’t wait to renew those pictures with the letters we receive this year.

    As you plan your holiday letter, stop by my website www.tiffanysilverberg.com where you can find tips and information about my writing services. Cheers!

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    Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: christmas, guest post, military

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    About Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life

    Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

    Welcome to Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life! I am so glad you are here.

    My name is Julie and I have been a military spouse for 16 years!

    My husband of 19 years has served in the active-duty Army and now the Army National Guard. We have lived in Germany & Tennessee during our time as a military family.

    We have three boys and have been through four deployments together.

    I hope that you can find support for your own deployments, PCS moves, or anything else military life brings you 🙂

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