Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

Julie

Why Military Spouses Can’t Just Put Down Their Smart Phone

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Military spouses and smart phones

Why Military Spouses Can’t Just Put Down Their Smart Phone

If you are on social media at all you know that there are quite a few articles going around about being on our cell phones too much. How we need to put them down, hide them, ignore them. While there is some good advice there, my first thought is usually something like, “Well, try being a Military spouse.”

Between having kids in school, having a husband who is gone a lot and making money online using my phone to do so, I will not be putting my phone down anytime soon. My phone is my lifeline and I really haven’t always had it. I didn’t even get a smart phone until 2011.

There are many reasons why people say we shouldn’t always have a phone in our hands, but Military spouses, NEED to have a phone in their hands.

Why? Because…

Our spouses live in our phone.

When your husband is gone and you only get to talk to them on the phone or over video chat, they live in your phone. That is your relationship. You are not going to be able to walk away from your phone for long. If you do, what happens if they call? You will miss the call. That is a hard thing to deal with. When we were in Germany, I only heard from my husband on the landline. That meant that I could not get his calls when I was out. It would kill me to come home to a message knowing I missed his call. For later deployments I didn’t have to worry about that. It was SO nice to know I wouldn’t miss his call just because we were out doing something. So no, I am not going to put my phone down so I miss his call.

Our friends live in our phone.

Military spouse friends move away. Then they live in our phones, they live on Facebook and that is where our relationship is. I have a handful of friends I will text or message throughout the day. It keeps us connected and makes it seem like they are not quite as far away. When you are having a bad deployment day, it can be helpful to pick up your phone and text a friend or check out their photos on Facebook. It makes you feel better and can keep your mind off of missing your husband.

Our family lives in our phone.

Only a small amount of Military families live close to their own family. Most of us live far enough away that the phone is the way we communicate with them. I will text or message my own family several times during the week. It is a great way to keep in touch and not lose contact with one another. Sometimes my family will Facetime me and it is fun to do that with them.

I hate phone shaming in general.

Yes it is possible to be on your phone too much, to ignore people while you are on it and to get sucked into the online world, but overall, a smart phone adds to your life.

So, Military spouse, don’t feel badly if you always have your phone on you. You need it. You rely on it. It is a tool you are using to make your life a little easier. No one should shame you for it. If they are, they just don’t get it so don’t let them bother you.

 

 

 

 

Share Your Hair And Support The Military With #ShareBeauty and Suave

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suave

Do you ever struggle with knowing how to do your hair each day? I know I do. A lot of times I find myself putting it up in a pony tail or bun. Boring I know but it is quick and easy. I think a lot of that is just being a busy work at home mom and not knowing what some other hairstyles would be. It is easy to put yourself on the back burner when you have so many other things you need to do each day. However, I am learning that there is a lot more you can do with your hair that is still quick and easy. I am also learning that with the right products you can really get it to look the way that you want.

Women who serve in today’s Military need to find a style that works and stays within the Military’s guidelines but that doesn’t have to mean boring. Although a simple bun might be the norm, it doesn’t have to be. Whether you are a Military spouse like me or serving in the Military yourself, Suave® will help your hair be all that it can be with easy steps to style and the right products that work as well as salon brands do.

Megastar beauty vlogger and Military veteran, Dulce Candy is leading the way and has created a how-to video with easy tips for her favorite military-inspired styles to help women create the looks, while staying within military regulations. She is really good at explaining each of the steps and will walk you through what you need to do to achieve that style.

You can see the video here…

Some of the great products that can help you with your hair are a part of the NEW Suave Professionals® Sea Mineral Infusion line and the NEW Suave Professionals® Luxe Style Infusion line. 

They are truly amazing and I have enjoyed using them the last few days. In fact, I plan to keep using them because I love what they are doing with my hair. They unlock volume and lock in moisture for natural looking body and bounce that’s easy to style with. I love how much cleaner and healthier my hair feels. I plan to use the Sea Mineral Infusion Moisturizing Body Shampoo & Conditioner everyday. I will also being styling with the Luxe Style Infusion Smoothing Light Weight Weather Proof Cream and the Luxe Style Infusion Anti-Humidity Hairspray to help with my naturally wavy hair that is prone to frizz, especially in the humid weather we have here. These products will make styling a lot easier.

I spent some time watching Dulce’s video and decided to try the 2nd hair style she talked about. I love braids and I thought it would be a fun hairstyle to try. I will be sharing the hairstyle on Instagram tomorrow on Veteran’s Day and I hope you will join me.  I can’t wait to see all the different styles that everyone can come up with.

There are so many different ways to support the Military. Suave® is doing a great job with their #ShareBeauty campaign. They have been an American family brand for the last 75 years and will be donating 10,000 products to troops overseas. What a great way to give back!

We want you! Wear your military-inspired hairstyle on Veteran’s Day, share using #ShareBeauty, or both, to support Suave as they donate 10,000 products to troops overseas.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of Suave via MSB New Media. The opinions and text are all mine.

*Comments submitted may be displayed on other websites owned by the sponsoring brand.

 

On Simplifying and Realizing I Can’t Do It All

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On Simplifying and Realizing I Can't Do It All

On Simplifying and Realizing I Can’t Do It All

I can’t believe it is going to be 2016 very very soon. 2015 has been an interesting year for me. It’s been a hard year. It’s be frustrating. But now it is almost over.
As I think ahead to 2016 a word keeps coming to mind…

Simplify

I know a lot of people pick a word for the year and I think mine is going to be “simplify” for 2016.

I have recently come to the conclusion that I can’t possibly do it all. Not all at the same time anyway. There is a lot going on in my life. I have a lot to do each and everyday. I am also one of those people who needs to have some downtime too. If I don’t get it, I get extremely anxious and frustrated. So I have to be careful about my scheduling.

I have three boys, 11, 8 and almost 5. I want them to be able to do what they want to do but within reason. My oldest two are not too big into sports but they do like swimming. My youngest will probably be starting soccer too. There is also homework to think about. Also, my 8-year-old with Asperger’s has a hard time when his after school time is not spent the way it normally is.

I have a husband who is gone a lot of the time so I don’t have that extra help. Most days I do all the cooking, homework time, bedtime and any cleaning that needs to be done. My boys have chores which helps but there is still a lot to do in the house.

I work from home as a writer and blogger and while I love this very much, balancing everything can be difficult at times. I have to make sure I keep up on what I need to do each day even when the boys have a day off or a long weekend.

I want to work on decluttering my home more than I did in 2015. We hope to move in the next few years and it will be easier to do with less stuff. I have already gone through a lot of my clothes but the toys could use another purge as well as random things we don’t even use anymore.

I want to focus on paying down debt because the less debt you have the simpler life becomes. I have been listening to the Enjoying Life on a Budget podcast and they have been really inspiring to me as they have been able to pay off a lot of debt and learn to live a simplier life.

I also plan to focus more on my writing, blogging and social media work as that is where my heart is. I feel like there have been some distractions and I need to let them go. This will be hard but it is something I have thought about for a long time now and I think 2016 is the year to focus and move forward in the direction I need to be going.  In the fall I will have all three boys in full-time school so that will help with my work hours.

I want to find ways to simplify my everyday life. I know there are things we can do and change to make this happen. It might take some work but it will be for the best.

As I think about all the things I want to do in my life I have to remember I can do some of them later. I don’t have to do them all right now, in the phase of life that I am in. It would just be too difficult to make it happen. I can do a lot, I do more than some but I can’t do it all and recognizing that is a big deal.

What about you? Do you ever feel like you are trying to do too much? What ways can you find to slow down and simplify your life a little bit?

Veteran’s Day With Baskin-Robbins

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baskin-robbins

* This post is a sponsored post!

Ice cream! What is your favorite flavor. I love mint chocolate chip!

One of my favorite places to get ice cream is Baskin-Robbins. I remember my Dad taking me there on my birthday every year for a special cone. I was happy to hear that they have a great promotion this Veteran’s Day giving back to those who have served.

In honor of Veteran’s Baskin-Robbins will donate 11 cents from every ice cream scoop sold on Veterans Day to the USO in honor of all service members, veterans and their families.

Make sure you go and visit Baskin-Robbins on November 11, 2015 and check out the Camouflage Waffle Cones and Waffle Bowls. Take your children because you know they will love to have some ice cream and eat it in a fun cone or cup.

baskin-robbins

About Baskin-Robbins:

Baskin-Robbins was founded in 1945 by two ice cream enthusiasts whose passion led to the creation of more than 1,200 ice cream flavors and a wide variety of delicious treats. The company is the world’s largest chain of ice cream specialty shops and has more than 7,400 retail shops in nearly 50 countries, including nearly 2,500 shops in the United States . Baskin-Robbins offers an extensive library of ice cream flavors, customizable ice cream cakes, frozen beverages and sundaes.

About The USO:
The USO strengthens America’s military service members by keeping them connected to family, home and country, throughout their service to the nation. For nearly 75 years, the USO, a private, nonprofit organization, has served the men and women in the U.S. military and their families throughout their service – from the moment they join, through their deployments and as they transition back to their communities. Learn more about the USO at uso.org.

November Veterans Day promotion:
In honor of Veteran’s Day Baskin-Robbins will donate 11 cents from every ice cream scoop sold on Veterans day to the USO in honor of all service members, veterans and their families. They will be teaming up with the USO to support more than 1.3 million active duty service members around the world by encouraging guests to take a moment out of their day to say thank you. Guests can text THANKYOU to 50555 and send a message to our servicemen and women. Baskin-Robbins will also celebrate the military community all month long with a special Camouflage Waffle Cone and Waffle Bowl, which are decorated green, brown and tan. Guests can enjoy these freshly-baked waffle cones with any of their favorite Baskin-Robbins ice cream flavors, including classics like Pralines ‘n Cream, Rocky Road and seasonal favorites like Pumpkin Cheesecake, Chocolate Almond and Fudge Brownie.

You can find Baskin-Robbins online at these social media sites:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/baskinrobbinsUS?brand_redir=527725837256414
Twitter: https://twitter.com/baskinrobbins
Instagram: https://instagram.com/baskinrobbins/

Sound good? Now plan for a trip to get some ice cream at Baskin-Robbins next Wednesday and help support Veterans.

 

What To Look For In A Military Spouse Best Friend

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What To Look For In A Military Spouse Best Friend

I have been a Military spouse for just about ten years now. During those ten years, I have made many friends. And a couple of best friends. These ladies are very special to me, even now when we don’t live near each other anymore. In the Military world friends always move away, even your best friends and there is nothing you can do about that.

I have been through deployments with a Military spouse best friend and I have been through deployments without one and it changes things. Having your own BFF to get through the deployment with will make it easier. You can depend on each other, vent with each other and tell each other that it is going to be okay. The hard part is finding someone to do this with. It doesn’t always happen and when you are moving a lot as you do as a Military spouse, you are always having to look for new friends.

What To Look For In A Military Spouse Best Friend

 

I know for me, finding friends is the easy part. Finding best friends is not. It takes a lot of work and yet you can’t force it. Best friends just happen sometimes and even if you really like someone else, they might not be the person to fit that role.

So what qualities make up a Military best friend? How do you know they are the one to fit that part of your life?

As a Military spouse and mom of three boys, this is what I think you should look for in finding a Military spouse best friend.

  • That you click. As I look back over my closest friendships, they all have one thing in common. We clicked. Almost right away in most cases. As soon as we started hanging out, it just worked and we knew it. I know sometimes you can be friends with someone for a long time and then get closer to them but I bet if you looked back at when you first met you can see that you did click right away, even if it took a while to get there.
  • That you can vent to them. If you have ever been through a deployment you know that some days you just have to vent. If you can’t do that with someone, it is going to be hard for them to be your buddy during the deployment. You need someone who you can vent to and that isn’t going to come back with a “suck it up and don’t talk to me about that anymore” type of attitude.
  • That you can depend on them. I have a very hard time asking for help, even when I need it. However, sometimes things happen and I have to call someone to help me. It is always nice to have that person you can call to help you out and not have it become an awkward situation. Whether it is because your child needs to go to the ER, your car breaks down or you need emergency babysitting help. It is nice to have someone to call and to be available for them if they need you in that way too.

Making friends is something all Military spouses have to do. Making best friends is the most important thing, especially when your spouse is away and your own family lives across the country or even the ocean.

What do you look for in a Military spouse best friend???

On Veterans and Hearing Loss

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Veterans and Hearing Loss

* This post is a sponsored post! I support the topic and would like it to be shared with my readers.  

Veterans and Hearing Loss

Due to the efforts of the Wounded Warrior Project and others like it, we have become more aware of military and veteran health issues like PTSD and traumatic injuries, but we often overlook one of the most common military service-related injuries: hearing loss and ringing in the ears, also known as tinnitus. Although the military has been implementing hearing conservation programs for decades, a recent report states that more than 60 percent of veterans return home with some degree of hearing loss, with more than 445,000 currently receiving compensation for hearing loss and 395,000 for tinnitus. Considering the sounds of war, the fact that service men and women suffer from varying degrees of hearing loss is no surprise. But there is hope. Several hearing awareness companies, like Miracle-Ear, have committed to serving veterans by improving their access to hearing aids and quality hearing healthcare.

Permanent hearing damage is often a direct result of sudden, loud explosions, the roar of airplane or ship engines, or even gunfire. These loud noises can cause the sensitive hairs in the ear to become damaged and can even degenerate nerve cells in the ear. Once this happens, electrical signals aren’t properly transmitted and hearing loss occurs.

Keep in mind that a single gunshot can emit 140dBs of sound; a dangerous level. For more information on decibel levels of noise, visit www.onedaywithoutsound.org.

Untreated hearing loss may lead to depression, anxiety and social isolation. While hearing loss is not reversible, its effects on your quality of life can be mitigated, and the first step is recognizing the signs and symptoms.

Recognizing the Signs

· Frequently asking people to repeat themselves

· An inappropriate response to what is said

· Difficulty following group conversations

· Defensiveness about communication problems

· Intently watching speakers’ mouths

· Turning head to side to “hear better”

· Being unaware with volume levels, such as talking too loudly or too softly and/or having music and TV volume on high levels

· Speech deterioration

· Fatigue, insecurity, and indecision

· Social withdrawal

It’s important to remember that hearing loss is not a weakness, and there are many options available to those suffering from it. With hearing aids, hearing can be improved. Modern hearing aids are designed to be discreet, unobtrusive and require minimal upkeep.

To learn more about hearing loss, visit Miracle Ear’s website.

 

Five Simple Ways To Thanks A Veteran With The Great Clips Veterans Day Campaign

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It is so nice to know that there are companies out there that will be offering discounts to Veterans on November 11th. Great Clips is one of these places. They are offering free Veterans Day haircuts on Veterans Day. It is great to find Veterans Day offers that can really help out those who have served our country.

Veterans Day

I am a Military spouse and surrounded by Veterans. My Dad served in the Air Force in the 1960s/1970s and my husband is in the Army National Guard. I also know quite a few Military spouses that have served in the Military too. My heart is so thankful for the men and women who have stepped up to the call to serve their country. I am also so proud to be married to one of these people. To have watched him join the Army, to be with him during all the years he was Active duty and to now be with him as he works toward his after Army years.

As we get close to Veterans Day, you might be wondering the best way to thank a Veteran. Here is a list of five simple ways you can do it.

Soldier and baby

  1. Thank them. Just say the words. Let them know that you are grateful for what they have done. The simple words, “Thank you” can go a very long way.
  2. Off them a discount. If you have a business, give a discount to any Veteran that walks through your door. Let them know that you care and save them a little money in the process.
  3. Volunteer for a Veteran’s organization. Even if you don’t live near a Military installation you can still find places in your community to volunteer to help veterans. Check and see what is going on and where you can lend a hand.
  4. Talk to a Vet. Listen to their stories. Hear what they have been through. Let them know they matter. Veterans have a lot to say but sometimes feel like they can’t tell their stories. Be there to listen and understand what they have been through in the past. Ask them about their time in the Military.
  5. Donate. You can donate to Veteran organizations with money or even goods. Sometimes people hold drives to collect used clothing, blankets and food. Be aware of what is going on in your community and try to be apart of it.

Thanks A Veteran

With more than 3,800 salons throughout the United States and Canada, Great Clips is the world’s largest salon brand. Great Clips salons employ nearly 35,000 stylists who receive ongoing training to learn the Great Clips customer care system and advanced technical skills. Great Clips salon owners and corporate office are dedicated to our salon communities with a focus on philanthropic and volunteer activities.

Active or retired military members get free haircuts or a free haircut card on November 11th, and any customer who gets a haircut at Great Clips on November 11th receives a free haircut card to give to a veteran. Only veterans and active members of the military are eligible to redeem the free haircut card. Family members of said military members do not qualify. This is the third year Great Clips is running this promotion, and Great Clips is the only major salon brand that offers customers a way to thank the veterans in their lives!

Thank the veterans in your life and visit your local Great Clips on November 11th to redeem a free haircut card to share with a veteran of choice!

Comment and share stories of special veterans in your own life and how you can thank them.

Am I A Different Person Then I Was Five Years Ago?

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Am I A Different Person Then I Was Five Years Ago?

I just finished the book Wild by Cheryl Strayed. In it she talks about her 1,000 mile journey along the Pacific Crest Trail. She went on this trip to help her deal with the death of her mother and her recent divorce. It is also a movie with Reese Witherspoon, one of my favorite actresses. We also saw the movie a few weeks ago.

The book and the movie touched me greatly. I have not gone through a divorce or the loss of a parent but I feel like the last few years have been a journey of some kind. A lot has happened and things have been hard. I had my third baby, my husband got out of the Army, joined the National Guard and is working at a job I am not happy about. It’s a job that takes him away from us too and I thought we were pretty much done with that.

These are the hard years.

The years of day after day of solo parenting, doing the best I can, crying and hoping that things will get better, praying that everything we are doing now will help in the long run and trying to enjoy the family time we do have together. There was a time I didn’t see my husband for 11 whole months in a row. This is so much better than that.

I was thinking about the person I was five years ago. The one that was pregnant with her third little boy. The one that had been through two long deployments. The one that thought that everything would work out and I see that I have changed.

Through the last few years I have become a different person…

My faith has changed a little bit, the way I view the world has changed, the way I view how to plan my life and how things are supposed to work has changed. Five years ago I didn’t know I had a son with Autism. I didn’t know my husband would deploy two more times. I didn’t know how anxious I would become over the little things or how hard that 4th deployment would make me feel.

I assumed that if we followed the path we were on it would end up in a good place but that isn’t exactly what happened. Somedays I think my husband never should have left Active Duty Army but then I remind myself that if he hadn’t, we would probably would be in the middle of another deployment right now. And that to me is unbearable to think about.

People told us that life after the Army is a long and hard process. It might take a while to get to where we can say that things are good again. This is true. We are about 18 months out and still trying to figure it out. My husband has about 18 months left of being in the National Guard and then that part of our life will be over too. I have a lot of anxiety about all of this. I just don’t know what is going to happen or what I can personally do about our future. I feel lost and scared sometimes.

I am almost 37, shouldn’t I have my life figured out by now?

Then I tell myself, life is a journey, no matter how old you are.

I don’t think I would ever be able to hike 1,000 miles by myself but I envy the process that Cheryl Strayed went through during her journey. It was something she needed to go through to heal.

I know in my heart that everything changes. What is bothering me today won’t be the case in the future. I have seen my life change dramatically in just one day. I know it can happen.

When I can take a step back and look of who I was at 31 and who I am now, I see that life is about changing and growing. I hope that these hard years will allow me to grow and change in a good way and make me a better person. I hope to learn from them. In some ways they are my 1,000 mile journey.

How have you changed in the last five years?

 

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