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Dinosaur Deploys

June 29, 2011 by Julie 4 Comments

My next guest poster is Laura from Military Word of Mouth.  She has a great idea for kids to help them through a deployment!  I know my boys would have loved something like this 🙂

Lately, I have been going through things trying to get rid of some stuff to prepare for our next move. Probably, pretty soon our landlady will be calling to let us know that someone is coming over to see the house to potentially rent for next year. While going through a bookshelf, I found one of my son’s photo albums from last year.


It’s just a small 4″x6″ album that I found at Walgreens for like a $1.00, but to him it was priceless. You see it contains photos of his dinosaur on an adventure, and not just any adventure, but an adventure with his daddy. When my husband deployed last January, my son gave my husband one of his dinosaurs to hug whenever he missed him.

So, my husband took pictures of the dinosaur on his deployment adventure and would send them to my son either by email or by snail mail.


I can not tell you how much my son loved this, but when he saw the pictures, his face would beam. He even asked if he could bring the album to show and tell to share with his friends at preschool.

Having a parent deployed is such a hard concept for a young child to understand and accept. This is such a simple way to help ease their pain, if only for a bit. If your spouse is deploying shortly, ask your child if he or she would like to share one of his/her small stuffed animals. If your spouse is already deployed consider sending it over in the next package you mail out. Have your child be the one to put it in the box so he feels like he is helping his daddy miss home a little less. If your spouse doesn’t have a camera, throw in a disposable one.

Filed Under: Deployment, Guest Post, Military Life Tagged With: Deployment, guest post

Living in Korea

June 20, 2011 by Guest Writer 15 Comments

My next guest poster is Megan who blogs at Megan Dub-Yuh.  She is an Army wife & Math teacher living in Korea right now. Thanks so much for the post Megan!

living in koreaLiving in Korea

We have lived in Korea for a year now.  Adam had been here a year before that,  unaccompanied.  We were drawn to the promise of 2 full years together without that big D word looming over our heads after Adam was sent here to heal from a broken ankle he received while training for the big D to Iraq.  (I am very grateful for that rod and 6 screws in his leg.)

Living in Korea
It has been a new challenge almost daily to live in country whose culture is so different from our own.  It can be very frustrating at times but when all is said and done my husband comes home at night and almost works regular hours (with the exception of a few TDYs).  When put in to that perspective I will deal with any cultural or language frustration.

When I began thinking about this post on what it is like to be stationed in Korea I began thinking about posts I have already made.  {If you would like to read any of them check out posts under the label Korea.  It has been pretty entertaining at times.}  But in the end I have decided to poll my followers on Twitter and see what they wanted to know about being stationed here.  Below are those questions and my answers to them (most of the answers apply to my experience with our location and the Army).

How hard is it to bring animals over?
It is a challenge but not impossible.  We have three yorkies and we decided to not bring them but left them with my parents.  When deciding whether we were going to bring them we took a few things in to consideration: housing, travel, and vet services.

Even though Adam was here already they wouldn’t let him get housing for the both of us until I was physically in the country.  I was coming in during the peak time for PCS and so we didn’t know if we would be living on post (where they have very strict animal noise regulations), in an apartment off post or what.  There was no telling if we would be able to find a place that was three yorkie friendly.  Also, there are no yards anywhere in Korea so if you have a pet that requires one don’t bring them.  Most Koreans, that do have pets, have small dogs since most Koreans live in apartments.

I was flying here via a 20 hour commercial flight.  The thought of taking my babies on that was overwhelming plus they only allow one dog per person in the cabin.
Finally, the vet services on post weren’t well established when we started to plan our move here.  They have become more established since getting here but we would probably have had to try and find an English speaking Korean vet regardless.
Lastly, if there is to be a civilian evacuation there are many regulations and very specific things you have to have done in order for you to get your pet evacuated.  They will be evacuated at a lower priority than you and your stuff so once you leave them in the pet area you won’t know about them again for a while.  More stress I wouldn’t want to deal with in the event of an evacuation.

What if you don’t like Korean food?
If you don’t like Korean food then you can eat on Post.  There is all of your normal food court fare.  BUT you are bound to find some Korean food that you like.  It isn’t all kimchi and spicy fish… even though that is a large part of their diets.  My favorite is Samgyupasal, or Korean bacon, cooked on a table grill and served with Kimchi, salad and roasted garlic.

Is it hard for the spouse to find a job?
Yes, it is very hard.  They do not have jobs for spouses on post and any jobs available that you may be qualified for are given first priority to Koreans because of the agreement we have with their country.  Korea has a ridiculously high unemployment rate and to get a job on post is amazing for them.  Before you get upset at this discrimination just keep in mind they will live here in this country that it is impossible to get a job in even if with a specialized degree and you are here temporarily.  Working off post will require you to get special work permissions added to your Visa and if it is a job that a Korean can do, again, they probably will deny you the permission.

What kinds of schools are available for kids?
If you are Command Sponsored (and I would recommend you only come here with your husband if you are Command Sponsored) there are the DoDDs schools on post.  Otherwise you will have to enroll your child in a Korean or International School which could cost you a lot of money.

How is the TriCare system there? Dentists?
There is a medical shortage here and it takes FOREVER to get an appointment on post and they only book two weeks out so hopefully whatever time they have available works for you else you will have to call back over and over again.  They also have very little equipment on post and if you have to have any tests done they probably will send you off to a Korean partner hospital, which is a whole new experience (not necessarily bad) of its own.
Once you get an appointment or if you have to go to the after-hours care clinic (ER) then you will have a short waiting room wait and very friendly, efficient service.
As for the dentists, I’m ashamed to say that I have yet to figure out how to make a dentist appointment.  It seems to be very convoluted and everyone I talk to tell me a different thing.

Are the locals friendly toward military families?
We have not encountered any animosity towards us.  If anything the woman are always telling Adam how handsome he is even if I am standing right there.  They also like to dig in your shopping cart if you are at their grocery stores.  They are just super curious to see non-Koreans most of the time.  In fact, a friend of mine had an old man tell her that although he had seen it on tv he didn’t believe people really had round eyes.

What size are the houses on base/post and off post? Will a kingsize bed fit?
The houses are super small.  Korea is a very crammed place and the people are generally pretty efficient and Spartan.  But if you think about it the country has a population of about 49 million people in the size of the state of Kentucky.  So, when trying to figure out what to have the packers send to your new home in Korea go with the bare minimum.  We lucked out and got a larger than average home outside the city we live in.  They have super small closets, cabinets, etc.  We brought a lot more than we needed and if we had moved in to the apartment that we originally thought we were going to then we wouldn’t have had enough room (we only brought about 1/3 of our HHG from our 2000 sq ft home in Texas).  As for a king size bed the answer is yes but there may not be any room for anything else in your bedroom if you do.

Is the water potable, or should you drink bottled water?
The tap water is safe to drink but it isn’t recommended.  It is full of extra minerals that we were told have caused Americans to have allergic reactions.  We cook with and bathe in it with no problem but for drinking we have a water filtration system that our land lords installed and that we pay about $20 a month to have.  It is serviced by a funny little lady every 3 months.  It also has instant hot water which is awesome.  I want one when we get back to the States.

How expensive is it to take vacations (not CONUS) to other countries?
To travel to other countries in Asia is pretty inexpensive.  Since you are so much closer the airfares are cheaper.  One thing to keep in mind is that many countries require for Americans to have Visas purchased and approved before traveling.  Some of these Visas are expensive (China is about $200 a person).

Traveling within Korea is infinite and also very cheap especially if you can stay on one of the many military installations throughout the peninsula or off the beaten tourist path.  There is relatively low crime here.  There is occasional pick-pockets, etc, in the touristy areas of the big cities but you really don’t have too much to worry about.  If you decide to stay in one of the “love” hotels which can be nice, inexpensive accommodations you could see human trafficking, which is a very real problem here.  So, just be careful.

Is it worth shipping your car over or should you buy one there?
Yes, it is worth shipping your car over here.  Cars are very expensive unless you can get one of the many OLD beaters on post, which if you need a second car you will have to do that.  Traveling by car is a lot more convenient than traveling by the vast public transportation systems that are available here and all of the signs are in Korea.  If you do drive in Korea you should definitely invest in an English-speaking GPS, it is well worth the money.  Driving here is a lot like playing Grand Theft Auto and you are guaranteed to get lost or miss your turn many times.

Living in Korea

What are no-nos in Korean culture that are fine in American?
For more information check out the book Rude American, Rude Korean.

What we do…

  • Writing someone’s name in Red ink.
  • Pointing
  • Sticking your fork in your food to rest it when not using it.
  • If you use the middle finger they won’t know you are insulting them.

 

What they do…

  • Cut in line.
  • Not make lines at food carts they just yell out their order.  So don’t wait your turn.
  • Run red lights.
  • Drive on the sidewalk.
  • Walk out in front of moving cars while holding their hands out expecting you to just stop.
  • Stare like you are a rare zoo animal.
  • Their version of the middle finger is to ball their hand up in a fist and point their thumb at you.
  • They don’t make their children behave and be quiet in public… they basically ignore them.
  • Park anywhere… even in the middle of a busy street.
  • Old ladies will grab children’s butts… even your children that they don’t know.
  • Pretend like they don’t understand you whether you are speaking English (and they do, too) or you are speaking Korean.

 

Filed Under: Duty Stations, Guest Post, Military Life, Pcs, Stationed Overseas Tagged With: duty station, guest post, Overseas

Top 25 annoying Army Deployment Questions and Comments

June 19, 2011 by Julie 4 Comments

Stephanie has offered a guest post to me 🙂  She blogs over at Mama Clementine!  She is a SAHM of four, been an Army Wife for 11 years and been through five deployments.  Thanks so much for the post Stephanie!

Top 25 annoying Army Deployment Questions and Comments

 

annoying Army Deployment Questions
Rakkasan  Deployment 2007
Matthew 11, Dylan 7, Lauren 5 

This morning I was reading a post over at Caffeinated Catholic Mamaof how people have lost all sense of personal-space and privacy, either because of our over sharing techno culture or maybe just a general lack of manners. She gives her wonderful list of Top annoying and prying questions from absolute strangers, Here.

While writing in her comments I was thinking that for me, being such a Counter-Culture Mama, the lists of random rude questions and offending comments from those that it just does not concern, could go on and on…ad infinitum. So, I thought for fun, I would make a small project out of several lists of obscenely annoying Questions and Comments that I have gotten from strangers, all neatly compiled into categories. 🙂
What follows is a list of my TOP 25 way too personal, yet oh so popular questions and all to common comments, that I have received during my husband’s Deployments.
      1. Oh, is your Husband Deployed ?
      2. Do you Miss Him ?
      3. Is it Hard ?
      4. Will they send Him home for the Birth ?
      5. Is it your Husband’s Baby or Jody’s ?
      6. Does your Husband know you’re pregnant ?
      7. Do you know who the Father is ?
      8. What will you do / How will you have a Baby by yourself ?
      9. Why do you have / keep having kids if he is gonna be gone so much ?
      10. Your children are so young, If he gets killed, they won’t remember him.
      11. Why do you have kids when, He could get killed anytime ?
      12. Your so Lucky you live off the government, the rest of us have to work.
      13. If you didn’t live off the government you wouldn’t be able to afford all those kids.
      14. Maybe your husband will die and you’ll get all that money.
      15. You should take out some more insurance on your husband, because he has a good chance of being killed.
      16. But, just think of all that extra money at Tax time.
      17. I don’t know how you could do that, I could never let my Husband do that.
      18. (My Sister-in-laws fave way of relating to me)…I know just how you feel, my Husband was out of Town, on the road, for two weeks last month !
      19. How can you be Faithful for 15 months ?
    annoying Army Deployment Questions
    Deployment 2003
    Dylan 2yrs

    20. Do you worry about your Husband cheating on you ?

    21.  You don’t think your Husband will wait a whole year do you ?

    22.  Don’t you all just sleep around with each others Husbands anyway ?

    23.  So, has your Husband Killed anybody yet ?

    24.  You could have gotten out / why would he stay in / It’s his fault he is Deploying / So he’s getting out after this right ?

    25.  Using up my time by going on a long rant about how you feel about the war and whether or not we should be “Over-There”

    ….and the  ***** Extra Credit Bonus*****

    So Wow, it is Just like Army Wives on The    T.V. Show

     

    Filed Under: Deployment, Guest Post, Military Life Tagged With: Deployment, guest post

    Guest Post: Stationed in Hawaii

    November 15, 2010 by Julie 1 Comment

     

     

    Stationed in Hawaii with the military

    This next guest poster is Tricia at This Happy Home! I first “met” Tricia on a yahoo mailing list years ago.  I am still hoping we end up at the same post sometime in the future 🙂  She is an Army wife with 3 little kids stationed in Hawaii 🙂  Since they are getting ready to PCS stateside again she will be writing a few other posts on her blog about Hawaii as well.

    Nearly three years after arriving in Hawaii as a disgruntled pregnant army wife who did not want to be here, I’m leaving, with two more kids than we arrived with, a person who is grateful for the experience, enjoyed her time…and wouldn’t fight coming back. Our duty time here has had some amazing highs (one and two) and some definite lows. I came with the attitude that this would be an experience unlike any we would have if we weren’t military, so I was going to take advantage of it.

    Some highlights….

    Stationed in Hawaii

    Keiki should be seen and heard. Everywhere. From church services to high-end restaurnts, normal kid noises and behavior are expected and welcomed. Rare is the “evil eye” from someone when your adorable keiki peeps up in the middle of service to tell you he needs to visit the men’s room or has the wiggles at dinner. You’ll find that Hawaii is one of the most family-friendly places you can be stationed.

    The kama’aina are amazing. I have never felt anything but welcomed by the locals. You’ll hear stories about how much the locals hate non-natives, particularly military, but I have never had a single occurrence. And I have spent quite a bit more time in the local communities than most military wives I know. They are friendly, warm, welcoming and helpful. They have a rich history in the islands and they love to share their history and culture. And food!

    If you enjoy Asian food, you’re in luck! Hawaii is rich with cultures from all over Asia and the Pacific Islands and, with that, comes incredible foods. From hole-in-the-walls to chains like Zippy’s and L&L Drive In, you’ll never have to search hard for good food.

    Where else can you be stationed and have the opportunity to be treated at a big pink hospital?! Tripler Army Medical Center is huge and, because it sits on the side of a mountain, it can easily be seen from many places. And the pink-ness of it makes me smile every time. Add in that I birthed both of my boys there and I have even more reason to smile at Tripler.

    One of the greatest things about being here, I think, is the ability to easily travel to the other islands. Airfare is very cheap, with prices starting around $40 roundtrip, rental car deals can be found utilizing Priceline and many hotels offer military rates. In a matter of a couple of hours, you can drive to the airport, fly to your destination and be on an island far different from Oahu. Take advantage of this opportunity!! I’ve known several military wives who have vowed never to travel to the other islands…I can’t tell you how much they’re missing out on!

    Stationed in Hawaii

    I’d gladly be stationed here again just went for the shave ice (call it shaved ice and they’ll know you aren’t local!)!! Our favorites are Waiola when we’re in town and Matsumoto’s when we’re on the North Shore.

    Its Aloha Friday, No Work ‘Till Monday In addition to the incredibly catchy tune that you’ll hear all over the radio on Fridays, the aloha spirit comes out on Fridays. Everyone moves a little slower, is a little more friendly and spirits are up. I recently learned that Aloha Fridays were the inspiration behind “casual Fridays” you find on the mainland…and that Aloha Fridays were started to encourage wearing of Aloha shirts!

     

    Stationed in Hawaii

     

    Need I go on?! 🙂 As much as I am not a beach lover, wow…we have some amazingly beautiful beaches!!

    Stationed in Hawaii

    And beautiful beach sunsets!

    And the struggles…

    With prices so much higher off base than on base, you’re “bound” to the bases for shopping. While shopping at Target and such is high, it is quite doable. Shopping for groceries? No way! Sale prices can often be decent but non-sale items have prices that are quite prohibitive for regular shopping.

    Getting around can be highly irritating some days. Between the traffic at rush hours, the high number of cars on Oahu, the parking spaces made for tiny sedans (which are a rarity!) and the lack of signage (it’s not unusual to be looking for someplace and somehow stumble upon it…without ever having seen a sign for it anywhere).

    If you want to eat ethnic food that is not Asian, good luck! Outside of a few restaurants, we’ve found very little good non-Asian/local ethnic food. Tex-Mex is especially hard to find. Pizza places that are not chains are also few in number. And delivery food? Even less!

    I knew it would be hard for me to live someplace with very little weather change from season to season. Growing up in the Midwest, I was used to four very distinct seasons. When I read in the guide-book that average temperatures were 80 plus or minus five degrees, reality hit. Seasons really were NOT going to be different in any significant way (save for rain during winter months if it wasn’t a dry year, which it was last year). This fall, for the first time, I noticed a very, very subtle change in weather–the winds were a little cooler, mornings and evenings were slightly chilly. If you weren’t paying close attention, though, it would be easy to miss. I miss different seasons but, more than that, I miss the CHANGE of seasons. I miss those early spring days when it’s just warm enough to go without a jacket, to crack the windows in your house or car. I miss leaves turning colors, the hint of crisp breezes, watching the stores for fresh apple cider and cinnamon brooms. I miss guessing whether early winter precipitation is rain or spitting snow. Every day the same (plus or minus five degrees!!) can be a hard adjustment.

    Stationed in HawaiiI knew the distance from the mainland (and associated travel costs) would be great. I didn’t realize just how great until I was traveling alone with a 3-year-old and 12 week old!! Add in travel costs and travel to the mainland can quickly become quite difficult to make. Even when staying in Hawaii, the difference in time (as zones can make it difficult to connect with family. Six hours behind the east coast (five during the winter) means that friends and family are almost at the end of their workday just as your day is getting started.

    Seemingly minor, it can grow increasingly frustrating when you can’t get online purchases shipped here. eBay sellers who insist custom forms are needed to ship to Hawaii so they won’t sell to you, retailers that only ship via UPS Ground (diapers.com, for example), no Amazon Grocery! And still others ship here…but for very high costs (Target, Frontier & King Arthur Flour, for example). When selections are already limited (groceries & craft supplies), the shipping issues add to the frustration.

    As with any duty station, Hawaii is what you make of it. The struggles can be really trying sometimes…but this is truly an experience you’d (likely) never have if you were not military.

    Filed Under: Guest Post, Military Life Tagged With: army wife, guest post, pcs

    Guest Post: Re-integration take 3

    November 10, 2010 by Julie 1 Comment

    Today’s guest post is by Lauren at Faith and Deploying!  Check out her blog too 🙂
     
    Coming Back From Deployment

    “The snooze setting on an alarm clock should be banned” I remember thinking that the very next morning after my husband had only been home for approximately 6 hours and had to report for his in-processing. My husband has a habit of snoozing for HOURS! And his alarm goes off every 5 minutes. I definitely did not miss the snooze button during deployment number 3, or the tossing and turning, or the side swipes of the elbow at 3AM. I didn’t have any expectations this time when my husband came home like I did the last two and I think that helped us more than my husband will admit. He wanted to relax and while I did resent the fact that he was living in a hotel in beautiful Guam for 5 months having someone cook and clean for him, if he wanted to relax, well then it was his R&R. He did manage to clean up some things and help out more when I asked and I found myself not nagging him like normal. Usually I only had to request once, maybe twice if I asked through a text message and he seemed to want more time with me not sitting at home (which was completely out of the ordinary). Don’t get me wrong we had our fair share of blow ups and I definitely said my fair share of mean things, but honestly this re-integration has been the easiest. I think I amount that to how well we did this deployment with talking and not holding grudges and learning about our marriage.

    The hard thing about re-integration is you have lived another life, one without your husband there to rely on. You realize you can cry alone, fix the power washer as you scream at it in your back yard, manage to discipline the dog, cook dinner, and catch up on emails all without any help. You are the Queen on your Lair and then suddenly, even though you might prepare for it, another person is suddenly there always in the way and making a mess. I don’t think they mean to make a mess, but let’s be honest they have lived in a 12X12 box (if you’re my husband) and only had 1 maybe 2 bags of possessions. The only taste of home is probably whatever came in the care packages you sent. So now an 1800 square foot house becomes fair game for shoes, socks, jackets, underwear, or just mess that you have no idea where it comes from. Let’s face it, it’s an adjustment.

    I think the longer you are married the easier it gets. You learn to balance more and explain your way of living to your husband so he can help mold his bad habits out of the house when he is home. But he’s lived a different life too, one where all he had to do was get up to work every morning. If he wanted to sleep until 3pm and snooze that rotten alarm all morning long and eat whatever he wanted and play his video games for hours he could. But now that he is home, things are different. There is suddenly someone who needs attention and duties to fulfill with the house. Responsibilities he hasn’t had to think about or do for 5 months. It’s an adjustment.

    I haven’t quite figured out the knack to re-integrating, but I am happier with this adjustment period. I find myself less reliant on my husband and more independent. I have no problem leaving him and going to a meeting or going out with my girlfriends. And we have no  issue just telling each other when we are upset. It’s an adjustment, but I’d rather have the adjustment and have him home than to not have him anymore. And I may just have to disable the snooze button on his alarm…..

    Since the time for baby is getting closer and closer, I figured it might be a good idea to have some guest posts. My mind is mostly mush these days and not sure how much blogging I will feel like doing right after he is born.  If you are interested in writing a guest post for my blog, please feel free to email me about it at juliethearmywife@gmail.com.

    Filed Under: Deployment Tagged With: Deployment, guest post, military, military wife

    Guest Post About Christmas Newsletters

    November 8, 2010 by Julie 2 Comments

    Since the time for baby is getting closer and closer, I figured it might be a good idea to have some guest posts. My mind is mostly mush these days and not sure how much blogging I will feel like doing right after he is born.  If you are interested in writing a guest post for my blog, please feel free to email me about it at juliethearmywife@gmail.com

    Today’s post is by writer Tiffany Silverberg.

    Christmas Newsletters

    Growing up as a Coastie brat, I moved every three to four years and ended up with friends all over the globe. Those were the days before blogs so relied on seasonal letters to get visual and written updates from our dear ones. From the time we could read, those holiday letters from friends around the world were precious. We couldn’t wait for the temperatures to drop and our mailbox to fill. My sisters would always rush to the mailbox to see who we would hear from. And we were happiest when those letters contained two things: a picture and a letter.

    *The letters without pictures were informative, but we ached to see how our friends and their siblings had grown. We would even pull out last years’ pictures and compare.

    *The pictures without letters seemed to be missing a caption. Why was the family sitting on top of a mountain? And which mountain? Or why were the all dressed up? The letters filled in the gaps. They answered all our questions. They made us feel connected to our friends, in a world before facebook.

    Even just last year, my husband and I went home for Christmas. Upon our arrival, my mom handed me “the basket.” The wicker vessel containing all the letters we had received. Each had been opened and read at least once by each family member. Now it was my turn. As I pulled out the pictures and read through the letters, my family watched waiting for my reaction to each story. Just as we had always done.

    As a military family, our holiday traditions always included letters that came anytime from Thanksgiving to Valentines Day. Even now, as a Navy wife, my fridge is covered in pictures of dear friends’ Christmas pictures. I can’t wait to renew those pictures with the letters we receive this year.

    As you plan your holiday letter, stop by my website www.tiffanysilverberg.com where you can find tips and information about my writing services. Cheers!

    Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: christmas, guest post, military

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    About Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life

     

    Welcome to Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life! I am so glad you are here.

    My name is Julie and I first became a military spouse in 2005 when my husband of 3 years re-joined the Army. Then, in 2014, he joined the National Guard. In January of 2024, he retired from the National Guard after 21 years of service.

    During our time in the military, we got to spend 4 years in Germany as well as Tennessee where we now call home.

    We have three boys and have been through four deployments together.

    I hope that you can find support for your own deployments, PCS moves, or anything else military life brings you through my articles and social media posts.

     

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