Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

military life

Military Spouses and Money: What We Should Be Thinking About

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The topic of military spouses and money can get pretty heated

The topic of military spouses and money can get pretty heated

Despite the fact that life does cost money, asking about money, your service member’s pay, or anything to do with how much money you are making can get a lot of different responses. From those who help you figure out what you need to know about money issues to others who seem to take the slightest question about finances and blow things out of proportion.

The truth is, as military spouses, we need to be aware of the money coming into our homes. It doesn’t matter if we have a job and make more than our service member or if we stay at home with the kids and don’t bring in any income. Finances are important, and we need to pay attention to them.

Military spouses should have a say

When money comes into a household, that money is spent on your rent or mortgage, utilities, food, home repairs, cars, children, and more. In some marriages, both partners work. They both bring in a regular income.

For some, this means all money goes into the same account. For others, this means that you each have your own account and decide who will pay what.

The problem is when one spouse does not work for any pay, and they feel like they don’t have a right to say where the money goes. This is BS right here. You are a married couple, and you should have a say where the money goes.

If your spouse isn’t allowing you to have a say about any money simply because you don’t bring in an income at the moment, something isn’t right.

Military spouses should be allowed to work

Jobs for military spouses aren’t always easy to find. There can be a lot of barriers in our way, from where we live to what type of job we are looking for. However, your spouse saying that you can’t, even if you want to, shouldn’t be one of them.

If the couple decides together that one of them will stay home with the kids and the other will be a sole provider, that should be a joint decision. The issue isn’t becoming a SAHM or not, the issue is when a spouse wants to work and her spouse is telling her she can’t.

This can be for all sorts of reasons, but it is something a couple needs to work out. There could be a valid reason not to work for a period of time, but both spouses need to be on board. Yes, the military does come first, but that doesn’t mean a military spouse has to give up on their own dreams. There is so much we milspouses can do, even during military life.

Military couples will go through different seasons

When we got married, we both worked full-time. Over the last 19 years, my husband and I have done different things, and the percentage of how much each of us made has changed over time. While there is the traditional idea that one makes all the money and the other stays at home for all those years raising children, this isn’t quite the norm anymore.

For one thing, living on one income can be difficult, oftentimes impossible, especially when you add multiple kids to your family. There will be food and diapers, then sports and braces and the expenses never truly end.

Life with kids costs money, and having a stay-at-home part isn’t always going to work. In fact, many stay-at-home parents end up making extra money from home or even have a nighttime part-time job.

Over the course of your marriage, who makes more money might change. Not every service member stays in for 20 years and wants to be in the military for a career. Not every SAHM wants to be one forever. There are so many more options out there too, from working from home to going back to school and finding a new career.

Military families need budgets too

Having a budget is a must. That way you and your spouse can get on the same page. You can see what is coming in and what is going out.

Although one of you will probably be the one in charge of the bills and getting paid, both of you should be in on the budget to see what your goals are and how close you are to achieving them. Having a budget will keep your money in line, and allow you to work towards your financial goals.

Sometimes the service member won’t have access

As a military wife, having my husband in charge of the bills while he was deployed wouldn’t have worked. As the military spouse back at home, I could always call a bank or a credit card company. He hasn’t always been in a place where he had access.

This is an important part of getting used to military spouse life. Ask yourself what would work best. Maybe for some, having the service member in this role makes sense, but for most of us, doing so can cause more frustration.

Again, this is something you as a couple need to work out. Like anything financial, find what works best for you and your spouse. Figure out any hiccups you might have when they are away, and work them out before they leave. Financial deployment readiness is important too.

Resources about money and military

Here are some fantastic websites to check out about money and the military:

Military One Source

MilSpouse Money Mission

Military Saves

Foxtrot and Pennies

Kate Horrell: The Military Finance Coach

Military Wives Saving

Military spouses and money can be a tricky topic. There are a lot of different opinions about what you should do and what you shouldn’t do. However, at the end of the day, you have to do what is best for you and your service member.

That might look different than what other people are doing and that is okay. Just make sure that you are working towards the life that you want and not stuck in a place where you are being left behind.

When You Feel Like Your Military Children Are Missing Out

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I remember feeling so torn during our first deployment. I didn’t want to do this Military life thing anymore. I didn’t want my kids to be without their dad. I didn’t want there to be so many pages of my scrapbook where dad was missing.

I started wondering if military life was worth the cost. Was it worth it for my kids to miss so much? I started wondering if despite my husband’s desire to serve, that our family needed to come first and that he shouldn’t do this anymore.

When You Feel Like Your Military Children Are Missing Out

That missing a child’s birth wasn’t worth it…

That missing their first day of kindergarten wasn’t worth it…

That leaving our kids with a stressed-out mom simply wasn’t fair…

And now all these years later I am still not sure if military life is fair to my children. It might not be. And that is a huge pill to swallow.

I can think about all the benefits of military life. I can think of all the places we have been, all the people we have met, and everything we have learned over the years.

But that doesn’t change the fact that my husband missed almost all of my son’s first year of life. That he will miss things in the future. That we will never get these years back.

Walking away from military life can seem like the right thing to do. To see that ETS date and end the military journey. To ask your spouse to pick another path.

For some, getting out of the military is the right thing to do…

For others, it isn’t that simple.

For some, serving in the military is something they have to do. That the military is a part of them. That the military is in their blood. Walking away isn’t possible.

And for the military spouse of that service member, things can be so complicated. You can’t help but wonder where you stand. You can’t help but wonder why they are okay with all the loss and heartache this life can bring.

But you also know that serving is a part of who they are, and what they have chosen as a career path. You know deep down they ache having to be away from you too. You know that they miss you like you are missing them.

When You Feel Like Your Military Children Are Missing Out

And when you remember that, when you remember that even though they choose the military, they also chose you, things get a little easier.

And from that, you can get through what comes. You can help your children through military life. You can be there, and be patient, and know that your path is okay.

Your military life may look so different from your own upbringing.

Your military life might be the opposite of what your civilian friends do.

But it’s your military life, for good or for bad.

While you might never be able to answer the question of if military life is fair to your kids, you know your kids will be able to make it through the challenges, with you by their side.

You might never be able to get those years back but the memories you make when you are together are priceless.

You might not ever have a “normal” life because you married a service member, but you are committed to still living a good one, however that looks.

Don’t be afraid to seek out help during this life. I have many different blog posts here at Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life on deployments, pcsing, and military life in general.

I have a Facebook group, filled with other military spouses who understand.

Check out your local communities to see what is available.

Join your FRG, local MOPS group, or find another way to connect with other military spouses that works for you.

Raising children in the military is, of course, going to be challenging, there is no sense in sugar-coating that. You want the best for your children, and when you realize they are missing out, that doesn’t feel like the best.

You might feel guilty about certain parts of this lifestyle, you might wish you could go back and give them something they missed out on, and you might not ever feel 100% about the choice to be a military family.

When You Feel Like Your Military Children Are Missing Out

But in the end, if the love of your life is committed to the military, you can be too. No matter how rocky the road might be.

You can find recourses to help, you can be your children’s steady in a world that doesn’t seem so, and you can take everything one day at a time.

As a mom, you will always do what you can to help your children through life. This doesn’t change just because you are a military family. Every family has challenges, the military life might just be yours.

What are your best tips for raising kids in the military?

When You Can’t Find a Job As a Military Spouse

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When You Can't Find a Job As a Military Spouse

You just moved to a new duty action. Your household goods are all unpacked. Your children are set up in their new school. Everything seems set except that you haven’t been able to find a job yet.

Military spouses often struggle to find employment for various reasons. Moving 2-3 years has a significant impact on it. You might have trouble finding a job you can do when your spouse is gone half the time. You could have moved overseas and discovered that you can’t keep your job, even though it’s remote. Alternatively, you may be unable to transfer your license to a new state, despite having worked hard for it.

It can all be very, very frustrating. So what’s a military spouse to do when they can’t find employment? Who can they turn to? Well, thankfully, there is some help out there:

  1. Hire Heroes USA – When I started looking for a full-time job a couple of years ago, I signed up for Hire Heroes USA. That was a smart choice. They helped me revise my resume and walked me through the entire process. At Hire Heroes USA, they help veterans, transitioning service members, and military spouses. They are committed to one-on-one support and guidance. They also have a job board.
  2. SECO Program – Through the SECO program, also known as the Spouse Education and Career Opportunities program, run by the Department of Defense, military spouses can access a range of employment support services.
  3. Hiring Our Heroes – Hiring Our Heroes offers a range of programs to support you on your career journey. One example is Career Forward, a learner-to-earner program that can help you advance your career by earning Google Career Certificates in data analytics, IT support, project management, digital marketing & e-commerce, or user experience (UX) design. They will also connect you with employers that are ready to hire. Additionally, you can find virtual workshops and Amplify, a free two-day workshop, as well as other programs that can provide support.
  4. LinkedIn – LinkedIn is one of those places that can be difficult to navigate. Yes, you can look for jobs there, but there is a lot more to it. LinkedIn is an excellent platform for networking. Don’t be afraid to share that you are looking for a job and what type you are looking for. Connect with others and grow your network. And, as a military spouse, you can receive a free year of LinkedIn Premium. Set that up on their website.

Feeling the need for a job when you can’t find one is highly frustrating. Balancing your career with your spouse’s military career can be overwhelming. However, taking advantage of what is available can lead you in the right direction. Make sure to take advantage. 

When You Can't Find a Job As a Military Spouse

When Military Spouses Give Themselves Permission to Pursue Their Dreams

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This post is in partnership with CollegeRecon!

When Military Spouses Give Themselves Permission to Pursue Their Dreams

As a military spouse, you know that this life can be a bit tricky sometimes. We support our service members in every way possible. But we also have dreams and desires of our own. We have things we want to pursue. And we need to permit ourselves to pursue them.

One way to pursue your dreams as a military spouse is to further your education. And VCFA can be a great option to do so.

When Military Spouses Give Themselves Permission to Pursue Their Dreams

What is VCFA?

The Vermont College of Fine Arts (VCFA) is a private, graduate-level college affiliated with the California Institute of the Arts. They offer Master’s degrees in a low-residency format.

What degree programs do they have?

At VCFA, you can get a degree in:

MFA in Film, MFA in Graphic Design, MFA in Music Composition, MFA in Visual Art, MFA in Writing, and MFA in Writing for Children and Young Adults.

What does a low-residency program mean?

Low-residency is an excellent option for military spouses. You don’t have to live in California, and you can complete most of your work in your own home, wherever that might be.

In VCFA’s low-residency MFA programs, you will meet with your class twice a year for an intense and vibrant 9-day residency on the campus. However, for the MFA in Writing and the MFA in Writing for Children and Young Adults programs, a remote option is available.

During these nine days, you attend workshops, lectures, discussions, critiques, exhibitions, performances, and more. Students also have the opportunity to engage with faculty over meals and in informal conversations.

What do they offer students?

During the program, you can find mentorship, work one-on-one with a faculty advisor, and form an individualized study plan tailored to your interests and goals. VCFA also publishes Hunger Mountain, a magazine created by faculty and students in the writing program, providing them with real-life publishing experience.

VCFA also just launched a podcast, Unapologetically Creative, which features bold voices in art, design, and storytelling. You can find it on Apple, Spotify, or iHeart.

Can you use the GI Bill at VCFA?

Yes, you can use your spouse’s or your own GI Bill to help pay for these programs! VCFA also participates in the Yellow Ribbon Program. Additionally, they offer VCFA Scholarships.

A VCFA military spouse student

Ciel-Nicole Williams, spouse of a Full-time Montana National Guard member, just started the MFA in Visual Arts program. When she realized she wanted to become a teacher and needed an MFA, she began exploring low-residency programs. As a 14-year military spouse, she recognized the need for a flexible way to earn her degree.

Ciel looked into and ultimately chose VCFA because it was a robust program that had been around a while and had a good reputation. She also used her husband’s GI Bill for the program.

VCFA, a way for military spouses to pursue their dreams

As you can see, the VCFA MFA programs can be an ideal choice for military spouses. Between its low-residency format and good reputation, military spouses seeking to further their education can find a suitable fit with this school. If you are interested but don’t have a bachelor’s degree, there are some special cases where you can move forward and work towards your MFA with a solid portfolio.

If you are interested in learning more, please sign up for one of VCFA’s informational sessions and complete their contact form. When doing so, please mention the Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life blog in the “Any questions” section.

Military Benefits Every Spouse Should Know About 

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Military spouses standing in a line

Hey there! If you’re reading this, you’re probably knee-deep in military life already. Between PCS moves, deployments, and trying to figure out what TLA even means (seriously, what’s with all the acronyms?), it’s easy to miss out on some seriously helpful benefits. Let’s break them down – and trust me, you’ll want to bookmark this one. 

TRICARE: Your Medical Safety Net 

Remember that time your toddler decided 2 AM was the perfect time for a fever, or you needed a prescription while visiting family across the country? That’s where TRICARE becomes your best friend. You’ve got two main options: TRICARE Prime and TRICARE Select. 

Prime is like having a medical home base. You’ll get assigned a Primary Care Manager (PCM), and they’ll be your go-to for everything. Referrals are required for specialists, but here’s the upside – you’ll barely pay anything out of pocket. Select gives you more freedom to choose your providers, but you’ll pay a bit more for that flexibility. 

Key TRICARE Tips: 

● Get enrolled in DEERS first – nothing works without it 

● Keep your ID card current 

● Update your info after every PCS 

● Download the TRICARE app (total game-changer) 

Learn more at www.tricare.mil 

MyCAA: Your Ticket to Career Growth 

Let’s talk about that $4,000 in education benefits that’s just sitting there, waiting for you to claim it. MyCAA isn’t just for traditional college – it covers certifications, licenses, and technical programs too. Think medical coding, real estate license, teaching credentials, or IT certifications. The best part? These are careers that can move with you. 

I’ve seen spouses use MyCAA to become everything from veterinary technicians to web developers. The program is designed for portable careers, meaning you can take these skills anywhere the military sends you. Plus, many programs are online, so PCSing won’t interrupt your studies.

Beyond MyCAA, there’s a whole world of military spouse scholarships out there. The Military Spouse Career Advancement Scholarship, the Joanne Holbrook Patton Military Spouse Scholarship, and countless installation-specific opportunities are waiting for applicants. 

Explore your options at myseco.militaryonesource.mil/portal/mycaa 

Employment Support That Gets It 

The Military Spouse Employment Partnership (MSEP) is like having a really well-connected friend in your job search. These employers – we’re talking companies like Amazon, Starbucks, and hundreds more – actively seek out military spouses. They understand our unique challenges and often offer flexible or remote positions that can survive a PCS. 

SECO takes it a step further with personalized career help. Need someone to translate your varied experience into civilian terms? Want to practice interviewing? They’ve got you covered. The best part is how they understand that a “gap” in your resume might actually be time spent managing a cross-country move with three kids and a dog (which, let’s be honest, is basically a project management certification in itself). 

What SECO Offers: 

● Resume reviews and writing help 

● Interview coaching 

● Career assessments 

● Education guidance 

● Portable career planning 

Connect with employers at msepjobs.militaryonesource.mil 

Housing: Making Sense of BAH and Housing Options 

BAH might seem straightforward – money for housing, right? But it’s actually pretty nuanced. The rates are calculated based on local rental markets, including average utilities and renters insurance. That’s why you might get more BAH in San Diego than in rural Oklahoma. 

If you choose to live on base, you’ll typically forfeit your BAH in exchange for housing, utilities, and maintenance. Off base? That BAH is yours to manage. The Military Housing Office becomes your secret weapon here – they know which neighborhoods to avoid, which landlords work well with military families, and can even review leases for you. 

Smart Housing Moves:

● Calculate your BAH before house hunting 

● Use the Military Housing Office for lease reviews 

● Consider school districts if you have kids 

● Keep utility costs in mind when budgeting 

Calculate your rate at www.defensetravel.dod.mil/site/bah.cfm 

Mental Health Support (Because Military Life is No Joke) 

Let’s be real for a second – military life can be tough on your mental health. Those long deployments, constant moves, and the pressure of holding everything together? It’s a lot. That’s why knowing about these mental health resources is so important. 

Military OneSource counseling is a game-changer. Twelve free sessions per issue, and you can start over with new issues. Having trouble adjusting after a PCS? That’s an issue. Struggling with deployment? Different issue. Marriage needs some tune-up? You guessed it – separate issue. Plus, you can do these sessions in person, over the phone, or by video chat. 

The Military Family Life Counselors (MFLCs) on base are another amazing resource. No appointment needed, no paperwork, and nothing goes on any record. They’ll meet you at the coffee shop, the park, or wherever you feel comfortable. They even have special counselors just for kids who might be struggling with military life. 

Mental Health Resources Include: 

● Individual counseling 

● Couples counseling 

● Child behavioral support 

● Stress management workshops 

● Deployment support groups 

Get started at www.militaryonesource.mil/confidential-help 

Money-Saving Perks (Because Every Little Bit Helps) 

This is the fun part – all the ways military life can actually save you money. The ITT office on base is like having a secret discount travel agent. Want to go to Disney? They’ve got tickets for way less than you’d pay at the gate. Universal Studios, local attractions, even cruises – always check ITT first. 

The Exchange and Commissary are obvious spots for savings, but don’t overlook the smaller perks. That military ID can get you discounts at places you might not expect:

Everyday Savings: 

● Home improvement stores (Lowe’s and Home Depot – 10% off) 

● Clothing retailers (Old Navy, Nike, Under Armour) 

● Cell phone plans (most major carriers offer military discounts) 

● Car insurance (USAA, GEICO, and others offer military rates) 

● Hotels and flights (always ask for military rates) 

But here’s a pro tip: sometimes the military discount isn’t the best deal. Always compare it with other available discounts or sales. And don’t forget about holiday weekends – many stores offer extra military discounts during Memorial Day, Veterans Day, and Military Appreciation Month. 

Find current deals at www.militaryonesource.mil/recreation-travel-shopping 

Pulling It All Together 

Listen, this military life isn’t always easy. Some days it feels like you’re juggling flaming chainsaws while riding a unicycle. But these benefits? They’re here because others before us fought for them. They’re here to make this wild ride a little more manageable. 

Keep your documents updated, your ID card current, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Join your base’s spouse Facebook group – sometimes the best info comes from other spouses who’ve been there, done that, and know all the shortcuts. 

Remember, you’re not just surviving military life – you’re building a life within it. These benefits are tools in your toolkit. Use them, share them, and help other spouses learn about them too. Because at the end of the day, we’re all in this together. 

Need more info? Visit www.militaryonesource.mil/military-life/spouses for a complete rundown of military spouse benefits. And don’t forget to check back regularly – benefits and programs can change, and new ones pop up all the time. 

Author Bio: Daniel Denkinger is an active-duty Air Force pilot and the founder of AFCrashpad.com, a company that provides fully furnished, military-friendly lodging for service members on PCS or TDY orders. Dedicated to supporting the military community, Daniel offers housing solutions designed to make military life more comfortable and stress-free. 
Connect with Daniel: ● Instagram: @afcrashpad ● Facebook: AFCrashpad ● Website: AFCrashpad.com

Military Benefits Every Spouse Should Know About 

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of the Military Community

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The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of the Military Community

I talk a lot about the military community. I have seen so much good come from people banding together to get through the hard stuff. Finding others who understand is extremely helpful. But…with the good comes the bad, and the ugly. 

The military community isn’t perfect. We have some flaws. We have some ugly parts. And like any community, as much as we try, they can sometimes take over your whole experience to the point where you just want to walk away. 

The good of the military community

The good of the military community includes walking alongside one another when you are hurt. It means planning a Thanksgiving dinner when all your spouses are deployed. It means stepping in and bringing another spouse groceries when she is sick on the couch. It means trading babysitting and letting people vent about the hard, and helping them come up with solutions to what seems impossible. 

The bad of the military community

The bad is having to leave the friends you have made that have felt like family, only to only ever like their Facebook posts in the future. The bad is feeling left out and not sure you can find a place. The bad is struggling to find new friends when you miss your old ones more than anything. 

And the ugly of the military community

The Facebook groups that poke fun at innocent questions from new military spouses. The hate for certain spouses based on whether they are married to and enlisted service member or officer. The misunderstandings that lead to a lack of grace and friendship. The loneliness some can feel because they can’t seem to find their people. 

The truth of the military community

The truth is that any community can have its share of the good, the bad, and the ugly. But as a military community, we have more at stake. We need one another in so many different ways. We can’t afford to be mean-spirited. We need to work past that.

As a community, we need to work together because with the world the way it is, with things heating up, we will need one another. And it starts with each of us. Extending that grace, treating others with respect, and striving to be the best version of ourselves.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of the Military Community

The Uncertainty of Military Life As a Military Spouse

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The Uncertainty of Military Life As a Military Spouse

Life as a military spouse can feel like a rollercoaster. It is filled with uncertainty, and that can be so hard to deal with. From not knowing when your loving spouse will be in the same country as you to having no idea where you will be living six months from now.

As a military spouse, uncertainty is apart of the deal. It comes with this crazy life, and it will always be there. We need to figure out ways to handle the unknown, and not let it control our whole life.

Yes, much easier said than done but there are a few things we can do as military spouses to help make this part of military life easier to take.

Accept the Uncertainty of Military Life

Reframing our mindset can go a long way in helping us accept that so much of military life is not set in stone, and there will be a lot of time when we just don’t know what is going to happen next. If we hope that things level out and become more clear, we are going to be disappointed.

While it would be nice to know when a deployment is going to happen, we have to be prepared that dates will change, and things might not work out the way they first said they would. While it would be nice to get firm PCS orders in a timely manner, we need to remember that we might have to wait and wait, and then wait again for everything to get sorted out.

Accepting that this is a part of military life will go a long way in finding contentment and not becoming as frustrated as a military spouse.

Focus On What You Can Control

While we can’t control what the military does, we do have things in our lives that we can. Focusing on those things will go on a long way. You might not be able to control where you are going to be stationed next. You can however control aspects of your move, where you might live, and other parts to your PCS.

Focus on what you need to do next for your own life and career. Figure out what your family needs that you can give to them. Try not to dwell on what is out of your control, and focus on what is in your control.

Find Support

You are definitely not the only military spouse out there getting frustrated over the uncertainty of everything. Even others not related to the military can go through periods of time when life is so uncertain. Life in general is a mix of good and bad, waiting for something to happen, and then moving forward.

Find mentors and seasoned spouses to connect with. These people will know that life as a miltary spouse can be all over the place sometimes. They probably have tips and tricks that have worked for them that they can pass on to you.

You never ever have to walk military life alone. There is both in person and online support out there. Find it, and work with your local community to find ways to help each other through.

Never Ever Write in Pen

This is simple. Invest in some cute pencils and an erasar. Anything can be changed at any time for any reason. Hope for the best, always, but plan for change too. Sometimes, those changes are what lead you to amazing places.

As a military spouse, things can feel a bit out of your control at time, and they are. But that doesn’t mean you can’t find the joy in this life anyway. Find ways to adapt to this crazy life and you might even surprise yourself over how much you actually do have control over.

Is Rank Really An Issue When It Comes To Making Friends As A Military Spouse?

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Did you ever watch Army Wives? You know how those military spouses are all such good friends despite their spouses’ rank? Is that even possible? Well, yes, and no.

While there are some cases when two spouses probably wouldn’t be friends because of rank, I think, for the most part, spouses don’t care. I would question the level of friendship between some of those characters on Army Wives, but in the end, I think they could all be friendly with one another if nothing else.

There are very few military spouses who ask a potential friend what their spouse’s rank is before they decide to befriend them. In my real-life experience of being an Army wife, usually, a spouse’s rank comes out but it is not something that you use to evaluate a friendship.

Usually, the conversation goes something like this, “we are PCSing to Fort Campbell and I wonder what E-5 housing is like” or, “once he goes to such and such a school, he will make E-7.” It is usually never, “Well, I can only be friends with spouses of E-6 and above.”

Rank is brought up as a simple fact of their service member’s time in the military, not something to rub in someone else’s face.

Rank shouldn’t be used to bring other people down and make them feel less than. Among us spouses, rank isn’t or shouldn’t be a big issue.

This isn’t to say that no one out there is like that, I am sure you could find someone who thinks that way. But in my experience, these people are not the norm.

You know why? Because most military spouses are really just trying to make friends. We all pretty much want the same thing, to be included, to find our people, and to have fun along the way.

We don’t care what your spouse does, we just want to know that you can relate to being a military spouse, at least in one way or another.

We don’t care how high up your spouse is, we just want to know that you have days when you miss them just as much as we miss our own and that we can laugh about that together.

We don’t care if there is an E by their rank or an O, we just want to know that we are not the only ones serving cereal for dinner sometimes and that feel overwhelmed by too many deployments.

Going through military life alone isn’t the best way to go and finding friends wherever you live is going to make this life a lot easier. Finding your people is going to help you through those lonely nights and crazy mornings. Knowing someone has your back is going to give you the bit of peace you need for this military lifestyle.

So if you are a new military spouse, try not to worry about people not wanting to friend you because of your spouse’s rank. I can’t promise that won’t happen, there are going to be those people out there. But I do know that most of us don’t care about that.

We want to know what your hobbies are, how old your kids are, what you like to read, what you like to watch, what your dreams are, what your fears are, and so on. 

And with time you will find the ones you will walk through this life with. The ones that will make you a better person. The ones you will befriend and have in your life from here on out.

Making friends as a military spouse is a must, no matter what rank your spouse might be. If you are new to your duty station, get out there and see what is going on. Figure out places to go to meet other spouses. Join your local spouse’s groups, and work towards finding those friendships. Doing so will be worth your time.

What do you think? Have you ever had trouble making friends because of your spouse’s rank? What did you do about it?