Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

military spouse

To the Military Spouse Whose Child Has Just Been Diagnosed With Autism

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To the Military Spouse Whose Child Has Just Been Diagnosed With Autism

In January of 2012, after a few months of testing, our middle son was diagnosed with Autism. At the time he was given the diagnosis of Asperger’s which they have since stopped doing. If he were diagnosed today, he would have gotten the “high-functioning Autism” diagnosis.

To the Military Spouse Whose Child Has Just Been Diagnosed With AutismThat day we found out what was going on with our son, and how we could help him. My biggest fear when we started the testing and doctor’s appointments was that they would come back and say they couldn’t see anything was wrong. Why? Because I knew something clearly was and I knew getting that diagnosis would help us understand how we could help our son.

At that time in our lives, we were not a stranger to special needs kids.

Our oldest son had been diagnosed with a developmental delay when he was three. We knew about speech and OT and special needs preschool. We were also pretty confident that our son would grow out of his delay, which he has. Autism is a different story.

You don’t grow out of Autism. Autism is something you have for your entire life. But that doesn’t mean that a person diagnosed with Autism can’t learn and grow as a person either. It simply means that Autism will be something they work through for the rest of their lives.

To the Military Spouse Whose Child Has Just Been Diagnosed With Autism

We started ABA with our son right away, and that helped us be able to navigate through our son’s behaviors, set him up for school, and allowed us to get that extra help and support we needed to figure out this new normal for our lives.

Right now our son is 11 and will be starting middle school next fall. This completely freaks me out. I am not sure how things are going to go. We have an excellent team at the elementary school, many of them have worked with our son since he was five years old and started kindergarten. We already have a meeting scheduled at the middle school this spring, and I just have to have faith that everything will work out for him.

As I look back on the last six years or so, I can’t help but think about all we have been through.

And while we were working with our son, figuring out what is best for him, working with ABA and the schools, we were living this crazy military life too. My husband deployed again in 2013, and I think part of the reason that deployed shook me so much was that I knew I would be the solo parent carrying for my son, as well as his brothers. At the time, he was struggling a lot with school, and it was hard enough when my husband was home. This is just one of the many challenges a military spouse is going to have when they have a spouse in the military.

So, to the military spouse whose child has just been diagnosed with autism, I know how scared you might be. For months, maybe even years you may have been wondering what is going on with your son or daughter. You may have had to fight for your doctor to even take you seriously. You might feel lost not knowing how to truly help your child.

To the Military Spouse Whose Child Has Just Been Diagnosed With Autism

And once you receive that diagnosis, you might be worried about how things are going to go in the future.

Everything you thought about parenting a child has been turned on its head. You thought you were getting on a plane to “Italy” and now you are in “Holland” and not sure how to make everything work. This is normal.

Don’t beat yourself up if it takes you or your spouse some time to fully accept the diagnosis. No one walks out of that doctor’s appointment knowing exactly what to do or what the diagnosis even means. That takes some time.

Before your child was diagnosed with autism, you might not have ever heard of the term EFMP (The Exceptional Family Member Program,) but now, that term is going to be a big part of your life when your spouse is in the military. EFMP is the program that is supposed to help your child get the services they need during your time in the military.

EFMP will make sure that you don’t get stationed somewhere without services for children with Autism.

While this can be a bit frustrating at times, especially when it comes to your spouse’s career in the military, EFMP is something you need to keep updated. Any military family who gets orders for an OCONUS location will also have to go through the EFMP screening too.

As you start to become more comfortable with Autism, you will start to notice something. One child with Autism is one child with Autism. It is called the Autism spectrum for a reason. Not everyone with that diagnosis is the same.

While there are traits that kids on the spectrum share, each kid on the spectrum can be different. My son had no issues with speech. While his older brother struggled, that wasn’t one of the things I worried about with him when he was a toddler and young preschooler.

To the Military Spouse Whose Child Has Just Been Diagnosed With Autism

As you tell people about the diagnosis, you might get some interesting responses.

From people who are trying to help to people who are very uneducated about what having a child on the spectrum means. At some point, you might start to feel like everyone has an opinion about what you should do for your child. But here is the thing, you are the parent, you are the one that decides.

You are the one that has to make the choices. You are the one that lives with your son or daughter and any choice you have to make. So don’t be afraid to ignore lousy advice or to tell people you are doing what you think is best even though it is different from what they would do if they were in your shoes.

Find supportive friends and spend more time with them.

Over the years we have had friends that have opened my son and our family into their lives and understand that he struggles with certain things other kids don’t. During deployments, these friends were even more important. I didn’t have another parent in the house to help; their kindness helped me through those times when I didn’t think I could do it anymore.

As a military spouse, you know that sometimes your service member will have to deploy or be away from you for weeks or months at a time. A diagnosis of Autism isn’t going to keep them home. I know how hard this can be and how overwhelmed you can feel.

To the Military Spouse Whose Child Has Just Been Diagnosed With Autism

Look for help. Look for respite. Find good child care providers that can help you.

Go to a church that gets it and wants to help instead of one that simply wants to shame your child. Reach out to family members who may be willing to stay with you for a while. Know that reaching out for extra help isn’t a weakness and will be your best bet in getting through all of this.

Know that you are not the only one with a special needs child in the military. There are so many of us out there, and we all want the same thing. We want to help our children, we want the best for them, and we want to figure out how to do all of that within the military system.

Here are some additional resources to help you as you navigate autism within your military world as well as a few military spouse bloggers that also have kids on the Autism spectrum:

Military Special Needs Network

Singing Through the Rain: Military Life & Special Needs

EFMP + Special Needs with the National Military Spouse Family Association

American Military Families Autism Support

Life Journey Through Autism: A Guide for Military Families

Military One Source 

Airing My Laundry

Autism Speaks

Advocating for ABA TRICARE Policy Change

Why Autism Awareness Matters

MilKids Education Consulting 

Do you have a child with autism too?

The Big List of Facebook Groups For Military Spouses You Should Absolutely Join

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The Big List of Facebook Groups For Military Spouses You Should Absolutely Join

Did you know there are quite a few Facebook groups for military spouses that are free for you to join and gain support from? As a military spouse, finding good support is so important. Whether you want a place to vent about a difficult deployment day, get advice on how best to stretch your paycheck, or to find people to help you achieve your goals.

The Big List of Facebook Groups For Military Spouses You Should Absolutely Join

Facebook has been the place to go to find this type of support. On Facebook, you can find your friends, make new friends, connect with others, and join Facebook groups based on a wide range of topics.

Finding a good Facebook group will give you a place to connect with others you have something in common with. You can get to know people in the group and help encourage one another. As military spouses, you know how important this can be.

Here is a big list of Facebook Groups For Military Spouses:

The Jo, My Gosh! Community– This is a drama free group for fans of the blog, Jo, My Gosh, where you can find military spouse support.

The Inspired Women Community-This is a positive community, founded by Megan Hall, host of The Inspired Women Podcast.

Mil-Blogging Buddies– Run by Kristen Smith, this is a group for bloggers in the military community, to gain support and share ideas. If you are a military spouse blogger, you should be in this Facebook group for tips and support.

Blog Your Genius Community– This community is also run by Kristen Smith and can offer you extra advice about your blog and what you could be doing to grow it.

MilSpouse Village– A brand new community for Military spouses and significant others, trying to make military life work together.

MilitaryBridge– This group is connected with MilitaryBridge that helps connect the military community to the best local, national and online Military Discounts, Military-Friendly Businesses, Reviews, and Resources.

Military Spouse Living-This group is through the site, Military Spouse Living, to ask questions, share deals, and more.

NGMS Happy Hour– This is a group connected to the NextGen MilSpouse Happy Hour Podcast, apart of the NextGen website.

The Big List of Facebook Groups For Military Spouses You Should Absolutely Join

Military Family Support Group– This group is run by Stars and Stripes Doulas, helping military families through pregnancy and beyond.

InDependent– InDependent has a mission to help connect military spouses to local health and wellness resources. They have some local Facebook groups in different areas for you to join.

Army Wife 101– Army Wife 101 has a Facebook group too, as well as a local group for those at Fort Bragg.

The Work from Anywhere Business™ Club– Run by Kayla Roof, this facebook group is perfect for military spouses who want to a run a business from anywhere.

MilSpouse Creative ™– This Facebook group is for MilSpouse Creative Entrepreneurs, hosted by Moni Jefferson.

The Financially Ready Military Spouse– This is another new Facebook group for military spouses connected to the site, Her Money Moves.

PCSing with Property Mommies– This Facebook group is all about PCSing. They also have a Military Relator Referral group.

The Big List of Facebook Groups For Military Spouses You Should Absolutely Join

Life Support & Encouragement– This group is run by the blog, Singing Through the Rain and offers you extra support for life’s challenges.

Military Moves Us – PCS to DC– If you are moving to the DC area, this group is going to be perfect for you.

Freedom’s Ring USA FRiends-This group is connected to Freedom’s Ring USA in hopes of connecting people around the world to help with their shared mission.

Military Housing Network– The Military Housing Network has a few local groups to choose from to help make friends and find connections.

The Military Dollar Community– This group is connected to Military Dollar to talk about personal finance.

The Seasoned Spouse– The Seasoned Spouse has a free Facebook group all about preparing for a deployment, you will just need to sign up on her site.

SpaceATheWorld– If you are interested in using Space-A, here is a Facebook group all about that. Get tips and help others plan their own trips.

The Big List of Facebook Groups For Military Spouses You Should Absolutely Join

Mighty Parenting– This is another brand new group based on the new Mighty Parenting podcast. Real talk about raising teens and parenting young adults.

Military Town Advisor-This is a group for the website, Military Town Advisor, and for military families looking for off-post advice.

MilKids Ed K-12 Parent Support Group– If you have school-aged kids, you will want to join this group. This group is connected to the MilKids Ed website.

She Is Fierce Community– This group is connected to the She Is Fierce blog, and offers community support.

Military Families Saving Money– This group about saving money is connected to the Foxtrot & Pennies blog and is for military spouses to help save money and use the resources they have access to in order to do so.

Military Wife and Mom – Community Hangout– This group is connected to the Military Wife and Mom and offers support for military spouses.

Career Military Spouses-This group is a safe place for military spouses to gain career advice, ask questions or share about what they have learned through their own career journey.

Military Spouse Networking– This group is for active duty, veteran, widowed, divorced, reserve, and National Guard spouses and partners to network and share about jobs and what they are doing in the community.

From Boots to Wingtips– This group is to help you navigate from the military back to the civilian world.

Marketing/Social Media Tips for Military-Focused Businesses & Entrepreneurs- Jenny Hale’s group is for military spouse and veteran entrepreneurs with military-themed businesses where they chat all things marketing and social media.

Military Travelers in Japan– This group is for members of the U.S. military community (active duty, retirees, and spouses) who are interested in traveling to Japan. From the Poppin’ Smoke blog.

In addition to these amazing group, you should make sure to join my own Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life Community group. In there you can talk about your military life, encourage others, ask questions, and enjoy my blog posts. I also have a few spin-off groups that might interest you too. Surviving Deployment with Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life, SWCL Share Your Business, Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life Military Spouse Memes, and SWCL Community Bloggers & Writers.

Do you have a Facebook group for military spouses? Are you in one you absolutely adore? Let me know what it is and if it is a good fit I can add it to the list:) 

To the Military Spouse Starting Their First Deployment This Year

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To the Military Spouse Starting Their First Deployment This Year

With a new year brings a lot of promise. We can’t help but think of all the things we will achieve, all the ways we will grow, and all the fun we will have. But for those with a deployment in the near future, things aren’t quite as exciting. Instead of looking ahead to the potential a new year can bring, there is dread. Instead of being happy about the new year, there is sadness, thinking about everything their spouse will miss.

To the Military Spouse Starting Their First Deployment This Year

If you are a military spouse starting your first deployment this year, know that what you are feeling is normal. Deployments are scary, and if you have never been through one before, you have no idea what to expect. You might be worried you won’t be able to make it through, you might be concerned your children will not understand, you might not see how you can say goodbye to the person you promised your life to.

The reality of saying goodbye for a deployment is that somehow, you do it. You drive them to where they need to go, you hug and kiss goodbye, and then you go home. And while you might do all of this with tears in your eyes, you will somehow find yourself in a place where you are ready to take on the months ahead.

So, to the military spouse starting your first deployment this year, make sure you are prepared for when they leave.

Figure out what you might need to make it through the time apart. Talk to your spouse about expectations, how to handle your finances, and anything else that is important to the two of you. You can never be 100% prepared for a deployment, but you can do things to make the transition a little easier.

Make sure to figure out a way to make friends at your current duty station.

I know that making friends is hard to do. Not everyone is nice. Not everyone gets you. But finding at least a couple of people to go through this deployment with will make the deployment easier. You will have people to walk through this hardship with and that is a good thing. Get out there and connect with groups and events at your duty station. They might have a lot going on that you can take part in and eventually meet people who will become your friends.

To the Military Spouse Starting Their First Deployment This Year

If you have an FRG, try to connect with them.

FRGs are not always the best, there can be a lot of drama, but sometimes the FRG is going to be the place to go to get through this. These are the spouses that doing EXACTLY what you are doing, for the same amount of time. If nothing else, maybe you can find a few other spouses through the FRG to meet for coffee once a week or get your kids together for a playdate. Don’t write off the FRG before a deployment just because you have heard they can have issues.

Buy a journal, write in it often.

Writing in your journal can be an excellent way to express yourself during the upcoming deployment. The journal would be a place to vent out about a bad day, complain about whatever is bothering you, and write our your feelings on everything that is going on. No one has to read what you write, not even your spouse. The journal is just for you and having one can be a good tool to have during your deployment.

To the Military Spouse Starting Their First Deployment This Year

Once the deployment starts, you can begin your countdown.

One day down means another day closer to them being home. There is something about the pre-deployment period that makes life difficult. You are both so stressed out about what is going to happen, that sometimes, once they leave and your countdown begins, you can feel a lot more in control of the situation. Know that no matter how many deployment days you see ahead of you, each day is a step forward and getting through each day can be a cause for celebration.

As you look at the rest of your year, not sure how things are going to go, know that there is support out there for you and your situation. From blog posts to websites, to books, to Facebook groups, to groups at your duty station. From a good friend you can hang out with a few times a week to a family member, you can call on your hardest days. Find the support that works for you and know that deployments eventually end and your spouse will be back with you again.

What are your best tips for getting through a deployment? 

 

Can Anyone Make it as a Military Spouse?

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Can Anyone Make it as a Military Spouse?

I have often believed that no matter who you are, where you came from, as long as you love your service member, you can get through anything. When my civilian friends tell me they could never do what I do, I want to tell them they could if they had married a service member too.

There have even been times in the past, before my husband joined the military, when I didn’t think I could do it either.

But, can anyone really be a military spouse? Can anyone who marries someone who serves figure out a way to make this work?

When most people get married, they assume they will be married until death do us part. Who wants to go into a marriage with divorce as the goal? But the truth is, not all marriages last, and not all marriages can survive the military.

Can anyone make it as a military spouse? That depends.

Some people can get through anything the military life brings them. This should be the goal. Working through the stressful situations, working on their marriage, and trying to figure out a way to get through it all.

Some military spouses married their service member years before they joined up. In these cases, life gets thrown entirely on its head when they join. Everything changes and that can be such an adjustment for the service member, military spouse, and children.

For others, marrying the love of their life meant becoming a military spouse on their wedding day, unsure of the adventures, or struggles they might run into in the future. Their new marriage is thrown together with the newness of military life.

In either case, the military spouse can feel like her world is falling apart, that they can’t make it through that deployment, that they are not quite cut out for this life.

I have felt this way myself. I would get to a place where I just didn’t see how I could keep doing this. Where everything was a little too much. Where I didn’t want to do the military life anymore.

But then, I remembered that I did indeed marry a soldier, even if he wasn’t actively serving at the time. I reminded myself that this is a part of who my husband is and that in the end, I can stand by him through whatever I need to. That my love for him and my want for us to be together will be more important than any lonely night or hardship the military comes my way.

 

That being said, this isn’t the case for everyone.

For some, this life isn’t something they can keep doing. They hit a wall for whatever reason. Sometimes they hit this wall because there has been betrayal in the marriage. Can you truly trust someone across the miles when they have cheated before? Sometimes there is abuse, or the couple cannot work out their difficulties.

The truth is, we don’t always know what other people are going through, we don’t know what happens in their marriage, and we don’t know what they have been through in the past. Compassion is a must.

While going into this life believing you can make it through is a must, know that if you were not able to, that if things did get too difficult, that if you are no longer a military spouse, that you have a right to do what is best for you. That you did what you could, and that no one should be judging you for doing what is best for your own family.

What do you think? Can anyone make it as a military spouse?

Military Spouse Holiday Memes: Laughing Through Deployment and Distance

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10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, and Season’s Greetings. This time of year is a time for family, for faith, for togetherness, and for love. The holidays can also be difficult if your spouse is away or if you are going through any other stressful type of situation.

Military life doesn’t always have the best timing. There will be years when your spouse will be deployed over Christmas. There will be years when they are home. There will be years when you don’t even have a home as you are PCSing during the holidays, and there are years when you will be able to invite your family and celebrate in the way you want to.

You might be able to go home for the holidays this year, as your family is only a three-hour car drive away. You might not be able to because the 2,000-mile plane tickets are out of your budget. Wherever you spend the holidays, whatever holiday you celebrate, I hope it is a good one, filled with happy memories and fun with the people you love.

Here are 10 memes for the military spouse this holiday season:

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

 

10 Memes For Military Spouses This Holiday Season

Whatever you do this holiday season, I hope you are able to make memories with your family, start new traditions, and connect together, even over the miles. As you look ahead to 2018, know that you can find ways to make it through anything that comes your way.

How are you celebrating the holidays this year?

Gaining Independence as a Dependent Military Spouse

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Gaining Independence as a Dependent Military Spouse

From the military’s point of view, the spouse and the children of a service member are considered military dependents. This word, “dependent” isn’t always easy to take. The word means we are dependent on someone else, on something else. That we might not get a say, even if we want one. Decisions will be made that affect us profoundly, that we have no control over.

Gaining Independence as a Dependent Military Spouse

And while we understand this is what the military calls us, through our years as a military spouse, we gain independence. We gain this skill when we go months at a time without our spouse by our side. We gain it when we have to move away from our comfort zone. We gain independence because we have to and because there is no other choice to do so.

The military pushes you to be independent

When your spouse leaves for the first time, whether they are gone for a short training exercise, basic training, or their first deployment, you will be pushed into independence in ways you otherwise wouldn’t be. Even simple things such as taking out the trash, buying the groceries, and putting the kids to bed will all fall to you. You will learn how to do what you need to do to keep things going in your home, your job, and with your kids.

Gaining Independence as a Dependent Military Spouse

The military life teaches you more than you thought possible

While you know you will have to be more independent in this life, what you learn from the time apart might even surprise you. Military spouses are often stronger and can deal with more than they think they can. Through being forced into a more independent role, you will learn more than you ever could have imagined.

That independence will help you in all areas of your life

The independence you gain from living the military spouse life will help you in all areas of your life. You will find that you can get through different hurdles you didn’t think that you could. You will become a little more confident in your parenting abilities. That your independence will even help you on your career path.

Gaining Independence as a Dependent Military Spouse

That gaining that independence can hurt sometimes, even if it is a good thing

Some military spouses go straight from their parent’s house to their first home with their servicemember. They might not have ever lived on their own before then. This new world can be quite scary and having to step out of your comfort zone doesn’t always feel good. There will be times over your years as a military spouse when gaining that independence might hurt, but that is all apart of the growing experience.

Being independent is a good thing. That skill will take you far. Even though the military calls you a dependent, know that you will become more independent over the years and that by doing so you can help achieve any goal you might have.

How have you become more independent during your time as a military spouse? 

Stepping Outside of Your Comfort Zone

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Stepping outside of your comfort Zone

Stepping outside of your comfort Zone?!?! Yes!!

By: Marla Bautista

In the military world, opportunities come and go. Many Spouses’ have made their mark as entrepreneurs, military family advocates, Department of Defense contract workers, and other careers outside of the military community. Then there’s you… trying to find your place in this life, but you’re having a hard time jumping in. I am going to fill you in on a few tips on how to not only survive in this small military world, but how to rock it!  

There’s so much going on around your post, get involved! Yes, I Know, meeting new people and making friends, (especially military spouses) can be hard, but try it, you never know who you’ll bond with. If you are a home body get involved in an online group for other women like you. You never know who you’re inspiring.  

This may even lead to you being a voice for people who think they don’t have one. It can be difficult moving to a place you’ve never been, interacting with people you’ve never seen before. But fear not, a little bit of food and wine will solve all your anxiety issues…well kind of. Try to make genuine acquaintances. If you are inebriated along with others, this can create a false sense of togetherness that may evaporate as soon as you run out of wine.  

Stepping outside of your comfort Zone

Are you having a hard time finding employment in your career field? Try volunteering. On post, there is a volunteer position in almost every career field. If you have a medical background, try volunteering with the Red Cross. If you want to be a veterinarian, check out the Vet clinic on post, they may have a need for volunteers.  

You never know where it’ll take you. Why should you use your precious time volunteering? Because this potentially is the easiest way to get your foot in the door and fast track you into your desired career. You may be the new employee they never knew they needed! Say Yes! Get out there! Make a name for yourself in your field.   

Say yes to working or volunteering in a group of your peers. Working with others can help you identify any self-image or branding insights you may not have seen otherwise. Ask questions, be open minded to new information.

Find a mentor to help guide you down your chosen path. You can never be too informed. I love to pick people’s brain, they may say something that I wasn’t thinking or tell me something about myself that I never realized. I have literally befriended people on Facebook, I didn’t know and sent a private message to them saying; Hi, I know you don’t know me but I love what you do. I want to be just as successful as you. Do you have any tips that can help me grow? You wouldn’t believe it, but people are very receptive to others who compliment them.  It shows that their work hasn’t gone unnoticed and they have made a positive impact in someone’s life.

Stepping outside of your comfort Zone

I have been lucky enough to mingle with some of the swankiest people due to my outgoing personality, but also because I want to be around people who are like minded and goal oriented. I have come far, but I have a long way to go. Doing things, I wouldn’t normally do, has helped me excel in my career field.

I have been recommended for certain jobs because of my personality and my hustle. I may not be the greatest at what I do, but I am a hard worker, who’s teachable, and that will take you further in life than talent alone.  

Stepping out of your comfort zone has so many advantages. You will learn and grow at every duty station. Don’t limit yourself!

Say Yes! Go out with a group of spouses you’ve never met. Volunteer to learn a new skill, be a voice for your community. There are literally hundreds of opportunities to make a difference in the military community. If you want something different, go out there and get it! Don’t be shy. Good things come to those who…hustle. Let everyone know your name!

I am Marla Bautista. I am an Army Spouse and mother of three, currently living in New York. I am a freelance writer and recently released my first book, My Thoughts Abandoned.  I have an Associate’s of Arts Degree from The University of Maryland University College and am currently working on my Bachelor’s in Communications. I love to volunteer my time within the military community and advocate for those in need. I am also an avid couponer and hopefully one day, a millionaire because of my frugal lifestyle! My Instagram and my blog, Hood Cents! 

What Military Spouses Want For Christmas

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What Military Spouses Want For Christmas

What Military Spouses Want For Christmas

Sometimes the holidays are a bit difficult for the military spouse. You could be going through a deployment, you could be getting ready to PCS, or you could be in a state of not knowing what is going to happen in the new year and it is driving you crazy. The holidays are a crazy time of year and military stress just adds to everything else you are trying to get done.

But what would make things better? What would help the military spouse, over the holidays and into the new year to come…?

Good friends

Good friends are a must! You can be there for one another, through the good and the bad days. You can have fun and make memories together. Having a tribe is one of the best parts of military life and will help you through any situation you might find yourself in.

What Military Spouses Want For Christmas

Enough wine

You can replace wine with coffee or your favorite type of drink. Just something to have on hand to get through. Not to overindulge, but to relax, or just to kick back with friends. We, military spouses, need to relax sometimes, even if it seems like we don’t have a lot of time to do so.

Extra patience

Military life is about waiting, and more waiting. Any extra bit of patience we can get would be helpful. Patience to wait until the end of a deployment, patience to wait on orders, patience to feel at home at a new duty station, the list goes on and one.

The strength to endure

While living this life, there will be many times when you need to find extra strength to endure. To get through the more difficult periods. To stay strong and thrive vs. just survive. As a military spouse, we are always looking for ways to make things a bit easier, and tips to help us through.

What Military Spouses Want For Christmas

Hope for the future

Being hopeful about the future will go a long way in whatever happens in the new year. Not all of military life is hard and difficult. Some of military life is pretty amazing. From the friends that you meet along the way, to the things you have been able to see and experience because your spouse serves in the military. Having hope that the good will come will help you get through the not so nice parts of this life.

A homecoming date

At the end of the day, we all want that homecoming date. We want to hear that it is too late to send another package, that things will be starting to be sent home, and that we should be picking out homecoming outfits and making signs. We want to know the end of the deployment is near and that our service member will be coming home.

While we might not be able to get all of these things for Christmas, we can do what we can to help with some of them. We can get out there and meet new people, we can work on staying patience in times when it is hard to do so, and we can find tips to help us though, whatever we are dealing with.

What would you add to this list???