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military life

Why Military Spouses Don’t Ask For Help

October 8, 2024 by Julie 11 Comments

Why We Struggle To Ask For Help

“Just let us know if you need anything.”

As a Military spouse, I have heard this phrase from many different people. It is a great thing to hear. When you hear people say that, you now know you have someone to call if you need to. Knowing people want to help is a good feeling.

But here is the thing…

Why Military Spouses Don't Ask For Help

Most Military spouses don’t ask for help, even if we could use it.

We want to be able to take care of the home, the kids, the money, the yard, and everything that comes up all by ourselves. We will never let that person know if we do need something if we feel we can kinda handle the task ourselves. There is just something hard about asking for something specific.

It is hard to say, “Hey, I need someone to mow my lawn because I just can’t seem to do it right,” or “Would you mind watching my kids while I take myself out to dinner? I really need a break,” or “I need someone to fix my fence. It is broken and I can’t afford to pay someone to do it.”

The list can go on and on. We feel like by asking for specific things we are asking too much. Or maybe it is because we don’t really believe the person telling us to ask. We might just assume they are just saying that and don’t really expect us to call.

I will admit. I hate asking for help. I try to do it myself first. I will always try to do it myself first.

When my husband was deployed the last time I had to mow the lawn all summer long. This was hard and every time I did it I would burst into tears when I was done. For some reason, mowing the lawn was emotionally hard for me. At the end of the mowing season, I hired a company to come out and do my lawn because I couldn’t imagine asking anyone to help with that.

My friends and neighbors had their own lawn to mow, right? And the last time I had asked someone was when I was going out of town for the summer and they didn’t end up doing it. So I would never ask. I would do it myself or I would hire someone to do it for me.

There have been a few times when I HAD to ask for help. There was no other option. In those times I was thankful that I had people to ask. Asking for help is a hard thing to do. To admit you do need help and to actually ask for it.

We want to be brave. We want to be strong. We do not want to be seen as weak.

But what I have learned during my years as a military spouse is that some people want to help, they really really do. They don’t know how to help you unless you tell them. I have seen people willing to cut our grass or help with the lawn. To bring us fans when our air went out. To offer a shoulder to cry on when I just didn’t think I could make it another day.

We are brave and we are strong but we are not superhuman and sometimes we do need extra help. We are doing the work of two people. It would be impossible to get everything right all of the time.

I tell myself over and over, it’s okay to ask for help. Especially when I am trying to balance everything in life with a husband who isn’t at home to help. But I hope that in the future I can be more willing to ask, because that can take things off of my plate and make for a little bit of an easier time.

Do you struggle with asking for help? Why do you think Military spouses struggle with this???

Filed Under: Deployment Tagged With: army wife, military life, military spouses

Finding Peace During Military Life

October 3, 2024 by Julie Leave a Comment

Life is always going to be busy, isn’t it? There is always something going on. Throw a deployment, training, or PCS into the mix, and finding peace during the storms sometimes feels a little impossible.

The truth is, this military life is going to keep you on your toes. There might always be something going on. There might always be something that is going to drive you crazy or keep you up at night. So what can we as military spouses do about it?

Take time for yourself

You need to take time for yourself. This is is super important. And it might look different based on the seasons of your life. Sometimes self-care is taking a long bath and relaxing with a good book after the kids go to bed. Other times it is making that appointment for a massage while your kids are in school. Find what brings you peace, and take time out for self-care. It’s a must!

Talk to a friend

Find friends that you can trust with what is going on in your life. Friends who won’t judge and will listen. Friends who can understand you might be feeling a little all over the place with everything on your plate. Good friends can help us through the ups and downs of military life, give us a place to vent, and allow for a better life.

Take a daily walk

There is just something about taking a walk. Whether you do so around the block in your neighborhood, on a greenway or trail, or even at the mall. Some even have early walking hours. Get out there, get moving, and enjoy all the benefits of this type of exercise. You will be glad you did.

Cut things out

Take a look at everything on your plate. See if you can cut anything. See if you can rearrange anything. Mixing up your schedule might be just what you need to find a little more peace. And make sure you are scheduling that time for you.

Take social media breaks

Social media is great, and it can offer us a lot of enjoyment. However, sometimes social media can be the thing that is breaking our peace. Sometimes it is the thing that is driving us crazy or making us feel less then. Take the weekends off, take a month away from a platform, and find ways to make social media work better for you.

Accept the crazy

We all know how crazy military life can get. You might be PCSing next month and then find out it was moved to June. They might be coming home from a deployment, and you aren’t quite sure how that will go. There is a lot out there that we simply can’t control. And sometimes the best thing to do is to accept it. Accept the crazy.

I know that this is always going to be easier said than done. But a lot of getting through military life is about your perspective. And that is something you can work on. No, you can’t control when a deployment hits, but you can control how you respond to it. Take a look at my deployment posts and figure out the best way to get through that time apart.

Finding peace during military life can be hard to achieve, and honestly, you might not get there, at least not 100%. Do what you can to work towards finding it, and allow yourself some grace if you are struggling. Reach out for help, find good friends, and remember, military life is a journey.

Filed Under: Deployment Tagged With: Deployment, military life, military spouse

6 Things You Should Remember When You Are Struggling With Military Life

October 2, 2024 by Julie 1 Comment

6 Things You Should Remember When You Are Struggling With Military Life

Sometimes, when my husband is gone, or even if he is home, the stress overwhelms me. I find myself in a place I don’t want to be in. There is too much going on, too much to think about, and my emotions are all over the place. I end up in a bit of a funk and feel like I am on the struggle bus.

But…

In those times, there are things I have to tell myself, things I have to remind myself of, and doing so puts me in a much better place. If you have ever felt like you are struggling with military life, you know what I am talking about.

You know that you can’t snap your fingers and have a deployment go away. You know you married a military service member and with that comes military life. But what you really want is to get to a better emotional place.

Here are six things to remember when you are struggling with military life:

Everything changes

No matter what you are going through, remember everything changes. Whether you are going through a deployment, waiting on a PCS, or just struggling through something, things will change, as they always do.

Change can be difficult, you might not want to move, you might not want the deployment to start, but change happens and we just have to go with it, knowing that eventually, things will get to a better place.

Some days I might be feeling down because I simply can’t make a decision on something important. I hate that. But I have to remind myself that time can make things a little more clear. And if it isn’t something I have to decide ASAP, I can give myself time to figure it out.

You have been through hard stuff before

Here’s the deal. You have been through hard stuff before. You have. Maybe you haven’t ever been through a deployment before, maybe this is the first time you have ever moved, but life in general can bring difficult situations, and you have been able to get through those in the past.

Maybe it was messy. Maybe you felt defeated. But you got through to the other side. Remember that.

You will grow through this

We always grow through our struggles, even if we can’t see that at the time. Journaling during your struggles can help, talking with a good trustworthy friend can help, and thinking about how you have changed for the better through it all can help.

And as you grow as a person, you can help others too. You might find yourself in a situation in the future where you can be there for someone going through what you are going through right now. We as humans can help one another out, simply because we have been there before.

Don’t take on other’s stress

One thing you don’t want to do is take on someone else’s stress. People do stress about all types of things and it can be easy to feel overwhelmed by all of that, epecually when you see it all the time on social media.

Try not to take on other people’s stress and focus on what you need to focus on. Think about what is best for you and your family. Don’t worry about things that don’t have to do with your current situation and you will be better for it.

Don’t forget to breathe

I know, easier said than done. But give yourself time to breathe. We say it is best to stay busy during a deployment, and it is. But if you are too busy, you could end up stressing yourself out even more.

Try to find that balance and give yourself a break. If you feel like you are doing too much, you migjt be. It’s okay to take a step back and breathe. You don’t have to say yes to everything. And if being too busy is the reason for your stress, take a step back to find some peace.

Count your blessings

Sometimes we really just have to take a step back and count our blessings. Living without your spouse for months at a time is not an easy thing to do. Having to say goodbye to friends and family all the time can be heartbreaking. Military life isn’t an easy life, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be thankful for the great things that are true about our lives.

Thinking about what we do have can help. Yes, your husband might be deployed for six months, but he does love and care about you and your kids. Yes, you do have to move again but now you have a new state to explore. Yes, military life brings on a lot of stress but you have meet some amazing people to walk through this life with.

There will probably come a time when you do struggle with military life. Things are not adding up the way you want them to. You are feeling frustrated because you can do what you are wanting to do.

And that’s hard.

But, if you are married to a service member, you can’t easily just walk away from military life, and so you need to figure out how to get through these feelings and get to a better place emotionally. And once you find ways to do that, military life will seem a little more manageable and you will feel like you can get through so much of what this life brings.

What do you do when you feel like you are struggling with military life???

Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: military, military life, military spouse

To the Burned Out Military Spouse Mama

October 1, 2024 by Julie

3:30 in the afternoon. That is when it hit me the most. My husband was deployed, I had a two-year-old, and a baby, and 3:30 pm was the worst.

We were pretty much done with our activities for the day, but 3:30 was too early to start dinner. What in the world do I do with these kids?

How will I make it to bedtime? Once I get through that, I knew I would have some time to myself, as long as I could stay awake long enough to enjoy that much needed time.

As I think back to our past deployments, these moments, the times when I was so burned out, I couldn’t imagine what else I could do. The times when I would burst into tears, when I cried with my kids, when I sobbed after they went to sleep because I just wanted a break.

So, to the burned out military spouse mama, these days can be a struggle. 

You want things to go smoothly, but then they don’t.

You want to be able to get everything done, but you can’t.

You are missing your spouse more than anything, and struggle to help your kids through the deployment as well.

Mama, you need to breathe. It’s going to be okay. It really is.

This is simply a season of your life, and this feeling will not last forever.

Whatever parenting struggle you are dealing with at the moment, whatever it is you are trying to work through, this too shall pass.

When your kids are young, you might struggle with sleeping, and teaching them to eat, and potty training.

And then as they get older, you are trying to figure out how to get out of the house on time, how to handle kids and friendships, and how to get them to do their homework.

You will have to deal with sibling rivalry, and kid’s sports, and watching them grow.

To the Burned Out Military Spouse Mama

And through it all, you will feel burned out, often when your spouse is deployed.

You will wonder when you can catch up, when things feel more at peace, when things will get easier.

So to the burned out military spouse mama, take each day as it comes.

Make lists, to help you stay organized.

Find friends, those you can depend on, and have fun with.

Give yourself a break; you never have to be the perfect mother, just one that loves your kids and wants the best for them.

If your spouse is deployed, and the burned out feeling lasts a little too long, see what you can change about your routine. See what you can add or take away from your life. Find fun ways to celebrate the days you have already gone through.

Remember that nothing does last forever.

Your child will eventually sleep through the night, giving you more energy, and time to yourself.

Your son will eventually learn to use the bathroom, and won’t go to kindergarten in diapers.

Your daughter will eventually not throw a fit when you serve her vegetables.

To the Burned Out Military Spouse Mama

As you raise your children, through each stage, you will get frustrated, you will be burned out, and you will figure out a way through.

Special needs mamas can have different struggles. As one myself, I know that my 11-year-old isn’t doing all the things that an 11-year old should. This can be so overwhelming sometimes.

But even with him, I see change, I see growth, and even though it often feels like two steps forward, one step back, we are improving.

So to the burned out military spouse mama, you got this.

Maybe it doesn’t feel like it today, maybe it feels like you will feel this way for a long time, but you got this.

Whatever the struggle, whatever you are dealing with, you got this.

No matter how long you will be solo parenting, no matter how difficult your kids might be at the moment, you got this.

To the Burned Out Military Spouse Mama

Filed Under: Solo Parenting, Military Life Tagged With: military life, Military Mama, military spouse

Being Content When The Military Moves You Far From Home

September 27, 2024 by Julie

I moved out of my parent’s home and away from my hometown when I was 18. I couldn’t wait to explore and live somewhere else. I couldn’t wait for that independence. I was so ready and left when I had the chance to go.

When I did that, I didn’t know how far that independence would take me. When I was 26, we moved from Northern California to Kentucky, even further away. When my husband joined the Army, we moved to Germany, an ocean away. We came back to Tennessee and have been here ever since, and where we live now is exactly 1,985.9 miles away from “home.”

There is a part of me that yearns to be back. To be able to live where I used to live, to be able to do the things I used to do on a regular basis (like go to Disneyland once a week,) and to live the life I used to have.

Being Content When The Military Moves You Far From Home

But here is the thing…

Time has moved on, not just for me, but for my hometown. Maybe this isn’t true for everyone, but where I grew up is so different in 2022 than when I left in 1997. There is a lot more traffic, and less rain, and Disneyland is way more expensive.

I once had a pastor tell me something that still sticks with me to this day. I told him about our church back in California and how special that place was. How I wanted to find something like that again.

He told me that while that was amazing, if we left right then and returned, the church would be a different place. That it is easy to assume everyone from our past is frozen in time, but that isn’t true. People have changed, places have changed, and going back wouldn’t be like stepping right back in right after we left.

So if I were to pack up my family and head back to Southern California, things would be different. And maybe part of that is that I have changed. I am used to life in other places, not so much the life of someone in Southern California. This hit me hard on one of my most recent visits.

And it isn’t like I couldn’t adjust to life there again, I am sure I could. I am sure that over time, things would be okay. But remembering that I can never go back to 1997 and how things were back then is a comfort to me in a place so far from home.

As military spouses, many of you don’t live near where you grew up.

Some of you might just be a few hours away, others, across the ocean. You could be the type of person who couldn’t wait to leave, or maybe you never thought you would until you married your soldier and you had to go. Living away from home can be difficult, even for those of us who couldn’t wait to move away.

You miss things. You miss birthdays, weddings, and other events that make you sad to think about. You become the people that other people used to know. You become a part of their history and are no longer a part of their present. And that can be hard to take.

Homesickness can be real. You can feel like you gave up everything and for what? You might wonder if the time away is worth it. If spreading your wings a bit was worth it the homesickness.

How can you be content when the military moves you far from home?

Here are some ideas:

Embrace your independence

When you leave home, you become more independent just by doing so. There is now a lot more distance between you and your family, between you and what you are used to, between you and your comfort zone. You have to do things you didn’t think you would have to do, and you will grow stronger for it.

Embrace this independence that comes from being far from home. Take a look back at what you have done on your own. Look ahead to the future and on what you can accomplish based on these skills you have learned.

Explore your new home

Get out there and see what your current area has to offer. It might be totally different than what you are used to, but that’s okay. This will force you out of your comfort zone, but that can be a good thing.

Look up bucket lists for your new duty station, talk to your neighbors, and look for what other people do in their free time. Getting involved in your new community will help you find contentment there and lessen the effects of homesickness.

Visit

Yes, you moved away. But that doesn’t mean you can’t ever visit. Now, how often you visit is going to depend on many different factors. You might not be able to afford to do so too often, or maybe you can go home for every holiday. Find a good balance and what will work for you and your family.

If you live close enough, it might be possible to go home every weekend. This might not be the best idea if you want to dive into your new community. Give yourself some time to be where you now live, and not just escape home whenever you get the chance. If you can figure out a new home that is just a few hours from where you are from, those skills will help you when you move farther away.

Invite

Invite your family and maybe even friends to visit your new home. Show them around, show them your new life. Let them see what you are experiencing. Your friends and family want to know you are in a good place and showing them that place firsthand can be a wonderful thing.

When the military moves you far away from home, it can be so hard to figure out how to be content. There is a lot to miss about home, and for many, it can feel like your new duty station will never feel that way. Give yourself some time, get out of your comfort zone, and look for the good in your new place.

Where was the first place you lived after moving away from home?

Filed Under: Pcs, Military Life Tagged With: duty station, military life, military wife

Balancing Staying Busy When Your Spouse Is Deployed

September 17, 2024 by Julie

Balancing Staying Busy When Your Spouse Is Deployed

Stay busy!

Fill your days!

Don’t stay at home!

Have you heard this deployment advice before? It’s good advice. If you are always at home, not doing anything, the deployment is going to be a lot harder for you. You need to stay busy, find things to do, so that time passes instead of standing still.

But…

Can you be too busy?

What if you have taken on too much?

Can you survive without any downtime?

I know I can’t. I need time at home to recharge. I need to relax. I can’t be busy all of the time.

During deployments, I find myself trying to find the perfect balance. I want to stay busy, but I still want some downtime. I don’t want to get bored, but also want to be able to breathe a bit sometimes. And finding this perfect balance can be so difficult.

So what can you do to find that balance? How can you stay busy without being too busy? Here are some tips to help:

Say yes to the best

When filling out your calendar, you might be presented with so many different activities and events. Only say yes to the ones you really want to go to. What types of things do you really enjoy doing? What works best for your kids, and your budget?

By only saying yes to the best things, you can avoid feeling burned out by activities that really aren’t your style. While you want to be open to new experiences, if you know that taking your kids to a certain play-place always ends in tears, it might be best not to make plans to go there for the time being.

Know your kids

This goes along with what you say yes to. You know your own kids. You know what works well for them and what doesn’t. You know how much they can handle on a given day.

I have a son that needs a lot of downtime at home to recharge, especially after a long school day. This can be a big challenge when trying to stay busy. I always had to figure out the best way to balance our time keeping that in mind.

Stay busy at home

There are things you can do to stay busy when you are at home. You can start a DIY project, start on a new book series, or even sign up to take classes online.

You don’t always have to fill your calendar with big events or activities far from home. There is a lot you can do to stay busy at home, which can be helpful when you have small kids.

The key is having some type of plan. Invite a friend over for playdates, put down the dates you will be repainting your kitchen on your calendar, or make time to go for a walk to break up the day.

It’s okay to say no

It’s okay to say no. It is. Running a household when you are the only parent around means you have to either do everything or delicate everything so it gets done. You might be the only one cooking, the only one cleaning, the only one making sure the kids get to where they need to go.

Because of this, you can get burned out pretty easily. During this stage, you might find people asking you to do things. You might find yourself feeling like you always have to say yes.

But you know what? You don’t always have to say yes. You can say no sometimes. The world will not fall apart I promise.

If you are feeling pretty overwhelmed with your busy schedule, see what you can say no to. It might even be saying no to something that week, knowing you need the rest. It might even be saying no to something good, but deep down you know you need a chill day more than you need to be busy.

Plan days to relax

Put days on the calendar just to relax. This can look different to different people.

Some would want to just chill at home, others would book a spa day or go browse around a bookstore.

If you have kids, check into your local CDC to see if they have any Super Saturday events going on, or if they offer extra free childcare hours. You can take these days for yourself during a deployment, and create some peace during a busy time.

Don’t compare yourself to others

Some people like to be busier than others. I know for myself, I need to have my downtime, deployment or not. I like to get out and do things but if I don’t have that downtime, I can really feel it.

Sometimes I see what some of my friends do each weekend and I feel like I could never do that much on a regular basis. And I think that is okay. We all have different personalities.

During a deployment, you might see friends, even ones with a deployed husband, doing what you feel would be too much for you. Don’t worry about that. They are doing what is best for them, you do what is best for you. Don’t feel like you have to keep up with them if that doesn’t work for you and your family.

There is something nice about finding that perfect balance, and you might not always totally get there. You might go through months at a time where everything is flowing and then will have to redo your schedule and make some changes. Burn out is so very real during a deployment but you can do things to help stay more balanced.

Whatever you do, however you choose to stay busy, know that it is okay to take a down day, or not schedule so much. Figure out a good balance and remember that how you choose to spend the time might look different than how other people do. Find things you enjoy, and don’t be afraid to say no sometimes.

Make sure to check out my other deployment posts to help you through and enjoy these blog post from other military spouse bloggers on self-care and staying busy:

What does milspouse self-care look like anyway?

Self-Care for MILSOs: A Deployment’s Worth of Healthy Practices

50+ Amazing Things Military Spouses Can Do During Deployment

Filed Under: Deployment Tagged With: Deployed, Deployment, military life, military spouse

To The Military Spouse Who Needs To Know They Are Not The Only Ones

September 12, 2024 by Julie

One of the best things about the military spouse community is to be able to meet other spouses and know that you are not alone. To know that you are not the only person who is going through what you are going through. To know that you have people to share with, people who get it, and people who understand is such an amazing feeling.

Military spouse, you are not the only one who misses their husband or wife, even when they are gone for a shorter period. You know that down the road, they will be gone longer, but for now, a week or two apart feels like a little too much. You are not the only one who feels this way, so many of us miss our spouses even if they are gone for one day.

Military spouse, you are not the only one who feels broken during a deployment. Who feels like your life has changed so much and that things will never be the same again. You are not the only one who has to ask for extra help from family, friends, or even professionals to get through.

Military spouse, you are not the only one that is hating the thought of moving to your new duty station. 

You are not the only one that has thought about how you can stay, even as your spouse has to go. You are not the only one who has shed tears over the move or who wonders why things worked out the way they did for you to have to go there.

Military spouse, you are not the only one that has struggled with their faith simply because of the emotions that a deployment can bring. You are not the only one who wonders if God even answers your prayers because it doesn’t always feel like it. You are not the only one who has figured out a different path to be on, because of everything you have been through.

Military spouse, you are not the only one solo parenting that has hit a wall during deployment and felt like you want to send your children over to Afghanistan in a care package. You are not the only one that is planning a getaway just for you after your husband returns home. You are not the only one who wonders how in the world you will make it to that finish line with these kids and everything that needs to get done.

To The Military Spouse Who Needs To Know They Are Not The Only Ones

Military spouse, you are not the only one who can be annoyed with their spouse one minute and wish that they never had to leave the next.

You are not the only one who can’t wait for them to deploy only because you are tired of all the pre-deployment stress and fighting. You are not the only one who wishes you could talk to them whenever you want to and then not sure what to talk about when they do start calling you every day.

Military spouse, you are not the only one who has mixed feelings about homecoming. You are not the only one who worries about your marriage after so many months apart. You are not the only one who remembers how things were before they left and wonder if they will get any better now that the deployment is over.

Military spouse, you are not the only one who is worried about money. You are not the only one who debates on if you should get a better job, or if you should even be staying home with your children. You are not the only one who feels like you have made money mistakes in the past and pray you won’t make them in the future.

Military spouse, you are not the only one struggling with a mental illness.

You are not the only one dealing with anxiety that becomes even worse when your spouse has to be away. You are not the only one dealing with depression, wondering if you should go on meds or not, and working hard to get through what you need to do each day.

You see, sometimes we can misunderstand people, especially in our social media world. We can assume that everyone else is not going through what we are. We can assume that everyone else has figured it out.

People tend to only post the positives or the good things on social media. They don’t talk too much about their struggles. They don’t share the whole journey, just the result.

To The Military Spouse Who Needs To Know They Are Not The Only Ones

As a military spouse, not everything is going to work out the way that you want things to work out.

There will be frustrations and annoyances. There will be times when you want to throw in the towel and walk away. But there will also be times when you look at your spouse and know they are doing what they are supposed to be doing. That you will meet people or experience things that make your heart so very happy. That you will see the big picture and realize that you can get through this life, the best way you know how.

As you connect with other spouses, either in person or online, don’t be afraid to share your struggles. Work together to get through them and figure out solutions. Remember, there is no such thing as the perfect military spouse. There are only spouses that do their best every day to get done what they need to get done and be there to support their spouse.

So to the military spouse that needs to know they are not the only one, find people who get it. Find others who understand. If you are surrounded by people who don’t understand your life, you are only going to get frustrated. Get out there at your military installation, or find a good military spouse Facebook group online. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there, and take chances. If you can do this, your military life will become a bit easier, and you will see that you are indeed not alone in your journey.

To The Military Spouse Who Needs To Know They Are Not The Only Ones

Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: deployments, military life, military spouse

9 Reasons You Know You Are Married To A Soldier

September 9, 2024 by Julie

I feel like the Army surrounds me, every day. We live near Fort Campbell, which is a very Army town. There is no getting away from Army life around here. Whether it is hearing that a friend’s husband is deploying soon, seeing at all the bumper stickers on the cars, or even hearing training on post, even from 15 minutes away.

Being a solder’s wife has been an interesting journey. Some of what we have dealt with has been so difficult and frustrating, other things, have been sweet and beautiful.

9 Reasons You Know You Are Married To A Soldier

Here are 9 reasons you know you are married to a soldier:

1. You go to post, not base, but sometimes you still call it that.

Yes, you know it is an Army POST not base, but a lot of civilians call it that and sometimes you do too. Everyone knows what you are talking about.

2. Fort Campbell, Fort Carson, and Fort Riley are on your wish list.

Everyone has places they want to go; some posts are more popular than others. What are your favorites?

3. People always ask you if you have watched Army Wives.

Yep, get asked this question all the time. And yes, I have watched Army Wives. And no, it isn’t just like our lives. Far from it in some episodes more than others.

4. Deployments. Deployments. Deployments. 

This could be my infantry wife side speaking, but Army life means deployments, at least in my experience. And while deployments are difficult, you can get through them, even if it is just one day at a time.

9 Reasons You Know You Are Married To A Soldier

5. Army stuff, everywhere.

Whether they are coming home or getting ready to leave. Whether it’s your closet or your garage. Whether it is your car or theirs. Army stuff everywhere.

6. “First to fight for the right,
And to build the Nation’s might,
And The Army Goes Rolling Along.
Proud of all we have done,
Fighting till the battle’s won,
And the Army Goes Rolling Along.”

Enough said.

7. You shop at the PX, especially when you are overseas.

The exchange is the PX, not the BX. During my time as a military spouse, I haven’t heard many people mix that up, especially when you are overseas and the exchange is your Walmart.

8. You can get stationed in Hawaii, Alaska, or Germany, or all three.

Yes, you can. If you can go overseas, the Army does have a lot of OCONUS choices. And if you are lucky, you can go to more than one. Unless you are too homesick for the US, in which case there are plenty of CONUS based Army posts you could end up at too.

9. You know what an FRG is; sometimes you go, sometimes you stay home.

Yep, we have FRGs in the Army. While they don’t always work out and they might frustrate you, going to at least one FRG meeting when you get to a new duty station is a good idea. You never know, you might get lucky and end up in a good one.

While this blog post is about being married to a soldier, I would love to have guest posts based on other branches. If you are interested, please email me at julie@soldierswifecrazylife.com

Filed Under: Military Life Tagged With: military life, military spouse, Milspouse

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About Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life

 

Welcome to Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life! I am so glad you are here.

My name is Julie and I first became a military spouse in 2005 when my husband of 3 years re-joined the Army. Then, in 2014, he joined the National Guard. In January of 2024, he retired from the National Guard after 21 years of service.

During our time in the military, we got to spend 4 years in Germany as well as Tennessee where we now call home.

We have three boys and have been through four deployments together.

I hope that you can find support for your own deployments, PCS moves, or anything else military life brings you through my articles and social media posts.

 

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