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The Very Best Places You Could Get Stationed As a Military Family

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The Very Best Places You Could Get Stationed As a Military Family

The Very Best Places You Could Get Stationed As a Military Family

If you ask people what their favorite duty station has been you are going to get a lot of different responses. There are certain duty stations that people love and certain duty stations that people hate. Although it is true that you can bloom where you are stationed no matter where you are, some areas will be easier to have a good experience at than others.

So where are these locations? Should your spouse try to get stationed there too? Are there any cons of these coveted duty stations?

Where are the very best places you can get stationed as a military family?

Germany

What could be better than being stationed in Europe? Germany is one of the best! From the festivals to the mountains to the little villages, there is so much to love. If you want a duty station where you will grow you as a person and that will let you experience cultures and history you would never have otherwise, Germany can be your ideal duty station. We spent 4 years there and made so many memories during that time.

The hardest part of Germany is being away from your family and living so far from home. Visiting home on a regular basis is really not going to be an option for you and traveling everywhere when you have young children can be a challenge. That being said, if you get the opportunity to go to Germany, go. Being stationed there is an experience like no other and the military community is strong when you are stationed overseas.

Hawaii

Hawaii had to make this list. What could be better than living on an island? One that you would normally have to spend a lot of money for to come visit? One where you could go to the beach every day (maybe,) give your kids surfing lessons and take day trips to some of the most beautiful places in the US.  Hawaii can be a wonderful experience for your family. I have only been there as a tourist but I know there is a lot to do and a lot of great things to see.

I have heard that island fever is real and can hit quite hard. The schools are not rated very high and everything is very expensive. The good thing is that you do get COLA when you are stationed there and there is a great military community to be a part of.  I think Hawaii is probably what you make of it.

San Diego

Warm weather, lots to do, Disneyland an hour away? Oh, how I wish we could have been stationed in San Diego. Almost everyone I know who has been stationed there has loved it. You are right by the beach but still on the mainland. You can visit home a little easier than if you were in Hawaii and there really is a ton to do just a short car ride away.

San Diego is in California which can be a different experience for those who are not from the West Coast. Southern California has its own culture for sure but you never have to worry about the city shutting down for snow and they have In-and-Out.

Colorado

If you are a fan of the outdoors you are going to love Colorado. From hiking to skiing to exploring, Colorado has everything you might want in a duty station if you love being outdoors. And the mountains! I love seeing all the photos I see posted from friends who are stationed there. Their views are breathtaking. A lot of people want to be stationed in Colorado so if orders come up, take advantage of them and enjoy your time there. You might not be the biggest fan if you don’t like cold weather but I have heard that the snow there is beautiful, even if it starts in September.

 

Honorable Mentions

I also know these places can be great as well!

Okinawa, Japan
Virginia/DC area
South Korea
Ft. Lewis
Ft. Campbell
Monterey
Ft. Bragg
Ft. Hood

No matter where you might end up, you should be able to find a few positives and enjoy your time there. In some cases, that can be really hard and it might not even have to do with where you are. You could be very close to your family and even the beaches of Hawaii can’t take away your homesickness. You could have had the best experience at a post in Texas and after moving to Germany just can’t find your footing, at least not for a while. Your Grandma could be sick and you were really hoping for a post in Missouri, an hour from home but the Navy sent you to San Diego instead.

At the end of the day, finding that perfect duty station might not be possible but that doesn’t mean you can’t make the best of where you are. Get out and explore, get to know the local culture and remember, orders will come, you will move somewhere else and you will miss the time you spent during the years you were there. Wherever that might be.

If you are curious about a particular duty station, check out my list of posts I have covered on my blog!

Where would you love to be stationed next? What would you add to this list?

17 Reasons Military Spouses Are Rocking Military Life

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17 Reasons Military Spouses Are Rocking Military Life

17 Reasons Military Spouses Are Rocking Military Life

There are so many challenges that military spouses have to go through during their spouse’s career. From deployments to trainings to moving every 3-4 years. It can be way too easy to think you are not handling military life well. The truth is, most of us spouses are actually rocking military life. We are dealing with a lot and we do the best that we can to get through each day. Whether you are brand new to this life or have been a military spouse for many years, what you do, how you stand by and support your spouse, it matters.

Here are 17 reasons why Military spouses are rocking military life:

1. We are there for each other- We are there to listen to other spouses that are having a bad day, we are there for those that need a little extra help with the kids or just to be that friendly face that lives down the street. We support one another because we get this life and what being a military spouse is all about.

2. We volunteer- Whether it is for the school, the FRG, the chapel or anything else in our community, military spouses step up and make things happen. We serve in our local communities, on post and off.

3. We listen- We can be the listening ear someone needs. Sometimes we have been through what they have been through, other times we haven’t but we can still be someone they can confide in.

4. We explore- We plan adventures. We get out and see what is in our new city. We fly across the country to see our families, without our spouse. We plan trips to see things we would never have otherwise seen had it not been for the military. We have seen the US and the world and we enjoy making all those memories.

5. We say goodbye, over and over- We do this because we have to, not because we want to. Deployments happen, trainings happen and we say goodbye to the love of our lives. This never gets any easier and yet everytime we do it we feel a little bit stronger.

6. We pray for those deployed- We pray for our spouses, their Company, their Unit, their Brigade and all the men and women who serve. We pray for their spouses and mothers and fathers and siblings. So many people need to be supported when someone they love goes off to war.

7. We write- We blog, we write books, we write love letters, we write in journals. We get our words out, whether we share them with other people or just keep them to ourselves.

8. We work hard- We do what we have to do to keep things going. We work hard at what we do. Whether we work outside the home, inside the home or a combination of both. We make to-do lists and look for ways to get things done.

9. We are mom and dad- When our spouse is gone, we try to fill the role of both mom and dad. We know we can’t replace the other parent but we do what we can to help our children and keep things running smoothly.

10. We plan great homecomings- We make signs, pick out cute outfits and plan for that big day. The day we will always remember and the day that will always make us smile, no matter how many years have gone by.

11. We are proud- We are proud of our spouses and everything they have done. We are proud when they deploy, we are proud when they get promoted, we are proud that they signed up to serve their country.

12. We know how to make the best of a bad situation- When life gives us lemons, we might cry, we might vent but at the end of the day, we make the best of a bad situation. We get through these difficult days because we find ways to get through them. We know they are a part of the military lifestyle and we do what we can to handle each and every one.

13. We have patience- We might not feel like we have a lot of patience but we do. From dealing with Tricare, paperwork to go overseas or just waiting for that homecoming day.

14. We love our spouses from afar- We love them from across the ocean, we love them when they live in our phone and computer and we love them as they return to us and have to figure out how to handle the difficulties that come after going to war.

15. We can laugh- We can make jokes about how long the lines are at the Commissary on payday or how something so simple can take so long to get done. We have to laugh at these situations sometimes, the only way to get through them.

16. We know how to connect- We move a lot so we know better than anyone how to make new friends, how to connect and how to find people that understand us. It might take longer than we like sometimes but we are committed and work hard to find people that can be a part of our tribe.

17. We understand sacrifice- We understand giving up a lot for the sake of our country. We look at the military spouses that came before us and know we are not alone. We understand what true sacrifice is and what it means to serve your country.

Military Spouse Life

If you are not feeling strong as a military spouse, take a step back and see that you are in fact stronger than you think. That you are capable and that you are rocking this military spouse life.

How Do You Know You Are Ready For a Military Marriage?

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How Do You Know You Are Ready For a Military Marriage?

How Do You Know You Are Ready For a Military Marriage?

This weekend I saw an article about a young military spouse titled, “I Gave Up College to Get Married — Now I’m 19 and Divorced” This article was a story about a girl who married her boyfriend instead of going ahead to college, even though that seemed to be her plan. Her husband was stationed in California, middle of nowhere California and the challenges of that mixed with not being able to find work led to a divorce, just a few months later.

I really feel for this woman. I feel for her because it seems she made a mistake. She probably should not have gotten married. 18 is so young. So very young. College is a great idea for most people. If you have to choose between the two, what should you do?

Military life is also very difficult. Even more so when you are first starting out your lives together, when your spouse is not making a lot of money and you just are not sure what you are supposed to be doing while he is off doing his job. Add in a middle of nowhere base and you can find yourself feel pretty lonely. That mixed with feeling like you should have gone to college instead does not make for a happy home.

I know some of my readers are military girlfriends. They haven’t yet married their service member and they could be thinking about if they should. I was never a military girlfriend but before I married my husband I was involved in several long distance relationships. They were hard enough without the military so I can only imagine how difficult it is when you add the military in the mix.

How do you know you are ready for a military marriage?

  • Because you are ready for marriage and all that comes with it. You need to be ready for marriage. Marriage is a big step and changes things. You will no longer be on your own. You will have someone else that you will be a part of. You will need to share your things and your space and everything you have. You have someone else you will be making decisions with and someone else that will be affected but the decisions that you make. 
  • Because you are ready for military life and how difficult this life is going to be. Military life is probably going to be harder than anyone can prepare for. That being said, knowing what to expect can help. Knowing how military life can be difficult is also a good idea.
  • Because you have done everything you wanted to do before you got married. I knew I wanted to finish college before I got married. That was important to me. What is important to you? Do you want to be on your own for a while? Do you want to be at least 25 years old? I know sometimes meeting that special someone can change things but if waiting for something is important to you, try to do that.
  • Because you know that while this life is unique with its own challenges, all marriages take work. No matter who you are, your marriage is going to go through hard times. As a new military spouse, you might be presented with some of these hard times earlier than other spouses do. Knowing this going in will help you get through the more difficult days that are to come.

I know a lot of people who married very young and are still happily married. Some are military couples and some are not. I also know people that married young and did not make it. Some divorced early on, others, years later.

When it comes to marriage and if you should get married young to your military boyfriend, check your heart and your gut. Ask yourself if the military life is one you want to have. Although none of us can truly plan for this life and most of the time the military life is harder than we ever thought, going into a marriage not being open to the life isn’t a good idea.

Divorce happens. To a lot of people. For a lot of different reasons. Hardships in marriage happen and the military might just be yours. If you do decide to marry young and are put in a similar situation that the young wife I talked about above was, know that you can make it through that. There is a lot of military support out there, you can go to college online, you can figure out a way to support your military husband and make it through those difficult years.

Military life might not be for everyone, but if you want your marriage to work, if you are willing to commit yourself to your new marriage, you will be going into this new life with your eyes open. You have a good chance of making your military marriage work and creating a wonderful life with your service member.

 

What To Think About Before You Marry Someone In The Military

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What To Think About Before You Marry Someone In The Military

 

What To Think About Before You Marry Someone In The Military

Whatever situation you are in or whatever situation you have been in, you did have to make the decision to become a military spouse. You had to decide that YES, you wanted to spend your life with someone who is in the military. That YES, you wanted to become his wife or her husband which meant becoming a military spouse and everything that would include.

So, what does being married to someone in the military mean? What would life be like to marry your boyfriend who is now a soldier? What does it mean when your husband of five years wants to join the Marines? What would it mean to marry the person you are in love with knowing that marrying them meant moving across the country and living as a military spouse?

Here are some things you need to think about when trying to make this decision:

Saying Goodbye Will Be A Part Of Your Life

No matter who you are or what type of military spouse you are, you will have to say goodbye and often. You will have to sleep alone. You will have to wait for orders and your future. This is all a part of military life. How long they are gone and how often they will go can vary but the truth is, you will have to say goodbye to your spouse on a regular basis. If you can’t even imagine that being a part of your life, you are going to have a difficult time as a military spouse.

You Will Have To Be Away From Home

If your spouse is going to be going Active duty, you most likely will have to move away from home. In some cases, you can try to stay if your home is near a military installation or if your spouse does some type of duty that allows him to live close by to where you are from. However, in most cases, you will not be able to stay there for their entire career and you will have to move away. You could end up across the country, across the world or just the next state over. You never really know and sometimes you don’t get a say, especially as they move up in rank.

The Kid Thing

Ahh, kids. When you are thinking about the future and having kids, do you think about how your spouse might not be there? It’s a sad reality that they might miss your pregnancy, the birth and the 1st year. They could miss the terrible 2s or kindergarten. They could miss out on so much and sometimes there is nothing you can do about that but accept that. Can you handle that? Some people don’t think they can. I thought I could and it was harder than I could have ever imagined. For some military couples, they don’t plan to have kids while in the military. Their plan is to have them later on in life and that is an option as well. However, a lot of people don’t want to wait on kids and many military families have them during those years when the service member might not always be home. You need to be prepared for that.

The “D” Word

Your spouse might deploy for just a few months at a time. They might deploy for a year. They might have to deploy too often or get frustrated that they are not able to go and do their job. Deployments are rough. From the pre-deployment stage to after they come home and everyone tries to get back to normal life. If there are no deployments there will be trainings or other reasons they have to go away for weeks or months at a time. There is no way around that.

The Community

I have talked about the hard parts of military life. The parts that make it difficult to want to commit to this life. The reasons some people get out of the military before they thought they would. But what about the good things about military life? The community of military spouses that you will become a part of. The thing is, as hard as life gets, you won’t be alone in going through them. Many other spouses would have gone through what you are going to have to go through. Many spouses get that and can offer a listening ear. You will make some of your closest friends as military spouses. Friends that will help you through solo parenting, deployments, pcsing and even retirement.

Is It Worth It?

Is military life worth it? Is your love worth it? Only you can answer that. Only you know what you can handle and what you can’t. I will tell you that if in your heart of hearts that you know you should be with this person, you should be with them whether that includes military life or not. That is a special kind of love and you don’t want to walk away from it because you are scared of the future or what military life is really going to be like.

Are you a new military spouse? Are you dating a service member?

What are you most worried about when it comes to committing to military life?

Top 10 Posts Of 2015

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Top 10 Posts Of 2015

It’s that time. We are down to just 2 more days of 2015. Has it been a good year for you? I have to say, I had a pretty difficult 2015. I am excited about 2016. I am excited for new opportunities, more growth and more family time.

When it comes to the blog, I wanted to share my top 10 posts of the year. Go check them out if you haven’t already.

  1. 5 Great Work at Home Job Ideas– Want to work from home but just not sure what you can do? Here are some ideas.

  2. Why You Should Say Yes To A PCS To Germany- If you ever get the chance to PCS to Germany, you should go. It might be difficult at times but it will be worth it.

  3. Why You Should Use A DSLR If You Love Taking Pictures– If you love taking pictures you should start using a DSLR. It is so worth it and a great way to learn photography.

  4. The 5 Stages of Watching Your Best Friend Move Away– Did you have to say goodbye to a friend this year? It’s hard and there seems to a process we all have to go through when it happens.

  5. What I Miss About Active Duty Life– 2015 was the first full year of living life after active duty. Here is what I miss about it.

  6. Guide to the First 30 Days of a Deployment– Getting ready for a deployment? Use this guide to help you through that first month which can be quite difficult to get through.

  7. Struggling With Anxiety When Your Spouse Is In The Military– Do you struggle with anxiety while having a spouse in the Military? It just adds some extra frustration to an already hard situation. Know, you are not alone.

  8. It’s Okay Military Spouse, It’s Really Okay, I Have Been There– Military life is hard. But you are not alone. A lot of other people have gone through it in the past too. You are going to be okay.

  9. Paris, War and the Military Spouse– This is the post I wrote after what happened in November. Such a hard thing to deal with.

  10. Supporting Your Spouse’s Military Career– How you can stand by your spouse and help them through their career.

Thank you all for your support and love this past year. I hope you have a great New Year’s and a wonderful start to 2016.

The Hard Truth About Being A Military Spouse

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The Hard Truth About Being A Military Spouse

The Hard Truth About Being A Military Spouse

My husband and I had talked about him re-joining the Military for months before he actually did. It was a hard decision to make and I can remember thinking about how if he did join he would be gone for long periods of time. This would mean that I would be the solo parent in the home to our son and any future children we might have.

That was a hard thing to come to terms with. To think that I would have to be alone with my kids for periods of time. That wasn’t what I had in mind when I married my husband. We were going to have kids, several of them. He was a good father. He would be there for everything.

Being a solo parent is just one of the many ways that Military life is hard. It can really get to you and each day can be a struggle. And as much as there are good things about Military life like homecomings, good friends, taking pride in what your spouse is doing, there are some hard truths about it as well.

Your spouse is going to miss holidays

This one can be hard for some people, especially if you can’t make it home to be with other family members. Deployments and trainings doesn’t usually take off for the holidays, especially the smaller ones. You can’t ever assume that they will be home for Christmas, if they are, you are one of the lucky ones. You will have to make the best of it, celebrate later or figure out creative ways to still celebrate the holidays when they are gone.

You might have to give birth without them

Raise your hand if you had to give birth without your husband. So many of us Military spouses have had to do this. For me it was because they send him home on R&R but he didn’t get home in time. He met his son at our front door when he was three days old. Thank goodness my mom was there. I have had friends that do decide to go home if they know their husband will be gone for the birth. Others are able to Skype with them during the birth. Thank goodness for technology. Although a lot of commands do try to make it so that your spouse will be with you for the birth, it isn’t always possible.

Your friends will always be moving away

Military life includes a lot of moves. That means that people will be coming and going all the time. As a Military spouse you will have to say goodbye to a lot of people, your kids will too. Some of these people will be your best friends and saying goodbye will hurt in the worst way. Other friends might not be as close but you will miss seeing them on a regular basis and will feel their absence. And if your friends aren’t moving any time soon, you might be the one to have to do it. It is hard to always have to say goodbye and then try to make new friends again but we Military spouses do it. We do it all the time.

The Hard Truth About Being A Military Spouse

You will become independent and that will change the dynamic of your marriage

Because of the way Military life works, you will become more independent as a Military spouse. Things will break when they are gone and you will have to figure that out by yourself. You will have to run the household, pay all the bills, make a lot of decisions alone that a lot of couples make together. All of that will make you very independent. This can be a challenge when they are home. You will still want to do it all and sometimes you have to let them do things again. This is something you and your spouse will have to work through in order to get to a good place.

It’s important to understand these hard truths if you are a Military spouse. You want to be prepared for them and it is also nice to know that a lot of other Military spouses experience these challenges too. It can help you not feel so alone if your spouse is in the Military and you are living the Military life.

Leave me a comment and tell me what has been hard for you during your time as a Military spouse? How do you get through those challenges?

Want a free Guide for the First 30 Days of a Deployment???

Military Family Appreciation Month And The MetLife Tricare Dental Program

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This post was sponsored by the MetLife TRICARE Dental Program as part of an Ambassador Program for Influence Central!

Military Family Appreciation Month And The MetLife Tricare Dental Program

November is Military Family Appreciation Month!

It’s a great time to think about life as a Military family and everything we have gone through. Ten years ago my husband joined the Military. In 2014 we became a National Guard family. It’s been an interesting road for us. We have experienced so much over the years. First as an active duty family and now as a National Guard one. There are big differences between the two but through both of them we have been apart of the Military world.

We have been through four deployments and each one has been very different for us. From the amount of time he was gone to what he did while he was there to how old my kids were and how they reacted to it. A baby is going to be different then a five-year old with how they deal with the deployment. No matter how old the child is, it is hard to have to comfort them when they miss their Dad. They don’t quite understand why he would have to be gone for so long and I had to remind them that he would be home soon. As an adult I can understand his mission but it is hard to explain that to a child. I often times would tell them that he was off “protecting the United States” and as they got older that was easier for them to understand.

Growing up my Dad was home all the time. I often think about how different it has been for my own boys and that makes me a little sad. I have to remind myself that being married to someone in the Military can be difficult and I am not always going to be happy about it. The best thing for me to do is be there for my boys when they miss my husband and help them understand why he is in the profession he is in.

I also want to make sure that my kids have what they need, including dental care. We signed up for the TRICARE Dental Program (TDP) back when my husband first signed up for the Army. Then in 2014 we signed up as a National Guard family.

There are a lot of great benefits to those who sign up for Metlife’s Tricare Dental Program. You and your children will receive two cleanings and two exams per year and zero cost when you see a network dentist. A long with this you will have two topical fluoride applications that are covered in a consecutive 12-month period and you will also have a $1,300 Dental Program Annual Maximum per enrollee per plan year. You can read more about the benefits by going to the Metlife TDP website.

If you are a Military family, go to the Beneficiary Enrollment website and enroll your family in the program. Those in the National Guard or Reserves can be enrolled themselves too. Your dedicated Military service entitles you to this benefit.

Don’t forget to find Metlife TDP on Facebook and Twitter as well…:)

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MetLifeTDP
Twitter: https://twitter.com/metlifetdp

Enjoy the rest of Military Family Appreciation month!