Soldier's Wife, Crazy Life

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That National Guard Life From a National Guard Spouse

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Happy to have this guest post by Olivia on National Guard life! Want to write a guest post for Soldier’s Wife, Crazy Life? Please email me at Julie@soldierswifecrazylife.com and let me know! I take pieces on anything milspouse related, from deployment tips to duty station review.

That National Guard Life From a National Guard Spouse

I used to think military life was easy, fun, and quite frankly, no big deal. My spouse’s National Guard drill weekends were no issue because I would just go shopping with friends, spend time with family, eat all of the take-out Chinese food I wanted, etc.

So, the saying about things getting easier with time…I don’t think that always applies in the case of military life. 

You get older. You start a family. Family gatherings grow in size and number. Activities and events start to infiltrate the fridge calendar.

You start to overhear conversations like, “Hey dad, are you coming to my soccer game this weekend?” “I’m sorry buddy, I have to go away this weekend. I’m sorry I’ll miss it.” Again. He’s so sorry he will miss yet another game. Another practice. Another swimming lesson. Another family barbeque to celebrate someone’s birthday. The list goes on.

I can see the look on my husband’s face, and then in my son’s eyes. Sadness, disappointment, hurt, felt on both ends. You’re probably thinking, it’s one game or one practice, the child won’t remember. And you’re absolutely right if it was just one or two here and there.

However, it’s close to 50-75% of the time with all activities and day-to-day life in our household. I’m sure many people think the National Guard is just one weekend per month and a two-week training in the summer each year. 

Well, I wish it was just that, but that is far from the truth. For example, this year alone, my husband was gone for just under three months right after Christmas.

He was stateside, which was nice, but I work full-time and there was no way we could make a trip out to visit him a reality. This summer felt like a nice break because he literally just had drill weekends and that was it.

Well, here we are going into the fall, and into a new budget year for the National Guard, and the calendar is filling back up with additional trips to the guard base for additional duties to be completed. And, those are just the planned trips. You never know when a call will come in to go assist here or there, a week or two weeks gone. 

“It’s totally what you signed up for though, right?” I get this question or similar comments whenever I mention something related to my husband’s schedule. Yes, you are correct, when my husband was 17 years old, he signed on the dotted line and is literally owned by the government until further notice. I don’t know how a 17-year-old could’ve known exactly what this life would be like, but he signed up and has been committed to them for just shy of 20 years now.

On the positive flip side, I have family who keep a similar calendar of drill and military-related events on their calendar, and they are mindful of those when planning family events. I can’t tell you how happy this makes my heart! Some get it, some don’t, and that is okay- you work around your schedule and their schedule to the best of your ability. 

Other things that don’t seem to get easier or better with time, and often bring a sense of unnecessary guilt: 1. Repeatedly saying, “Sorry we can’t come, he has drill that weekend.” 2. “Don’t plan around us, you know how our schedule is.” 3. “This is our first weekend together as a family in three weeks, so no we aren’t going to plan anything.”  4. “Yes, we let our kids stay the night with grandparents just so we can have a couple of hours alone this month.” 

You’re able to recognize that some have it way harder or worse than you. You’re able to rationally tell yourself that you’ll get through this and it’s not that bad. But that doesn’t minimize the stress that you’re experiencing and comparing your situation to someone else’s just isn’t realistic. Everyone is different and we all deal with things differently. 

With all of this complaining or over-explaining, there are a few things that are amazing when it comes to the National Guard life. Amazing friends that just get it and don’t think twice about rescheduling something five times, because they are in the same boat.

The excitement on my kids’ faces when they see dad fly over during a training mission. The fancy dining out ceremonies that give us a few hours to relive our prom days. The pride in knowing that my husband and fellow National Guard soldiers do so much for our community and country. And, did I mention the ability to have as much Chinese take-out as you want on drill weekends? Yeah, that hasn’t changed a bit. 

The National Guard life is different from other branches of service, and yet still comes with its own set of challenges. If you’re a National Guard spouse, just know that I hear you & see you. And if you want to get take-out on drill weekends, I fully support you 😉  

Olivia Moser is a National Guard spouse of a CW04 CH-47 Pilot in the Nebraska Army National Guard. They have two children and an active puppy at home. She is a member of the Soldier Family Readiness Group (SFRG) for her husband’s current unit and is a member of the local Auxiliary Legion post. Olivia works full-time as a Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner (LIMHP) and Clinical Program Manager with the State of Nebraska. She is a trained crisis negotiator, forensic interviewer, and QPR suicide prevention facilitator. She is also on the state’s Critical Incident Stress Management (CISM) team. 

Go to ne.ng.mil for more information about the NEARNG

https://ne.ng.mil/FPO is a resource for Warrior & Family Support in the NEARNG

13 Memes About Military Spouse Friendship

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13 Memes About Military Spouse Friendship

13 Memes About Military Spouse Friendship

There is something about a military spouse friendship. We can be there for one another through all of our military challenges. From deployments to pcsing, friends will make this life easier.

Sometimes finding friends can take a long time, sometimes it happens right away. Here are some memes all about military spouse friendship. Enjoy!

Military friendships

I don’t like to say goodbye, I like to say see you later. It’s an easier thing to say. 

Military friendships

I love how we can meet and connect with others from all over the world during our time as a military spouse! 

Military friendships

One thing is clear, you will always have your memories.
Even if you don’t see your friends for a while, you always have the moments you spent together. 

Military friendships

Our friends will probably be from all over but that’s the best part. We can learn from one another’s experiences and share our own. 

Military friendships

Yes! We always need people we can be free to vent to about the deployment. We know we would do the same for them. 

Military friendships

Sometimes when you or your friend move, you will never live near each other again. But good friends, you stay together, even if you are no longer in the same time zone. 

Military friendships

Finding a good friend can change everything!

Military friendships

#4, calling a good friend can be a great thing to do during a bad deployment day!

Military friendships

That would be the best! Your spent 2008-2011 together in Italy and now you will spend 2017-2019 together in California. Thank you Military!

Military friendships

Keep putting yourself out there. You will eventually meet some good people to connect with. 

Military friendships

Being kind is a must. It makes you a good friend. 

Military friendships

This couldn’t be truer; friends are lucky to have. 

Military friendships

Sometimes it is hard to put yourself out there. Keep doing so. You never know who you might meet.

Here are some posts on friendship as a military spouse…

 What To Do When You Can’t Make Friends At Your New Duty Station!

10 Of The Best Places To Make Friends When You Are A Military Spouse

Finding Your Military Spouse Tribe

5 Tips for a Better Homecoming Day at the End of a Deployment

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5 Tips for a Better Homecoming Day

From the moment your service member leaves for a deployment, you start thinking of homecoming day. You dream about that day, you plan for it. You spend hours looking for the perfect dress, the perfect sign and you want everything to go as smoothly as possible.

I have experienced four military homecomings plus all the random times we reconnected after a time apart. When I flew into Germany I was nothing but exhausted after the long flight with my toddler. Still, seeing my husband again after 4.5 months was everything. This was the first time we had ever been apart and we were finally back together again. I didn’t have a sign, I am not even sure I cared what I was wearing but I was back in his arms and everything felt normal again.

When it comes to homecoming day, it is way too easy to become too stressed out about everything that needs to happen.

Here are 5 tips for a better homecoming day:

1. Remember, the dress is for you- Picking out that perfect outfit for a homecoming outfit can be a lot of fun. You spend a little more money than you normally would, and you get to go shopping with friends and buy something special that you will always remember as your homecoming outfit. However, I don’t think what you wear matters to most of the service members coming home from a deployment. They want to see you. They want to hug you. They want to be home. The dress is for you and if you are too stressed about what to wear, don’t be. Pick a nice outfit and you will be fine.

2. Make a to-do list- Preparing for homecoming is all about having a to-do list. There are things you will probably want to do right before they come home. From having the carpets cleaned to figuring out what your kids will wear. Make a good to-do list and stay on track. This will help with your stress level. Know too that you probably don’t have to do everything on your to-do list but having one will keep you busy and keep you from overstressing in the last few days.

3. The simple things are the important ones- Remember, you just need to know where to go and what time, everything else is just extra. Your service member is excited to be home and to see you and your children again. Try not to stress if one of your rooms isn’t clean or if you couldn’t get the right type of beer for your husband.

4. Times and dates will change often- Times and dates for homecoming can change and you might not know for sure until just a few hours before. I really had no idea that my husband would be in one afternoon until he called me from Canada. Try to go with the flow and remember OPSEC!

5. Homecoming is good but can be hard for some- Homecoming can be one of the best days, but for some, homecoming is a day when the reality of war hits. Coming back from a war zone can bring up a lot of different emotions. Both for you and your service member. You are used to being the only adult in the house, they are used to being around other service members all the time. They have been through things us spouses might not be able to imagine. The reintegration period isn’t easy and knowing that you might need some extra help after homecoming day is important.

The good thing is that there are resources out there to help. Here are a few worth looking into:

Military One Source

Real Warriors

IAVA

Operation Homefront

Reboot Combat Recovery

Are you getting ready for homecoming? What has helped you to stay sane during the last few weeks of the deployment?

When You Are Used to Living in Survival Mode

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When You Are Used to Living in Survival Mode

When You Are Used to Living in Survival Mode

When you have your first baby, you go into a bit of survival mode. Everything is so new, and now you have this other person that depends on you for everything. You are not getting much sleep, and you just want to get through each day. And somehow you do. Your baby learns to sleep through the night, they start to walk, then run. They start to eat real people food and before you know the fog lifts and you feel more like yourself again.

As a military spouse, having a new baby isn’t the only time I have been in survival mode. 

My husband left for Germany when my son was just 13 months old. We had to wait for Command Sponsorship to join him and during those 4.5 months apart, I was right back into trying just to make it through each day. I didn’t sleep too well and found myself up until 3 am every night. Then my son would be wide awake for me just a few hours later. We didn’t have family nearby, and I was pretty much on my own other than a couple of friends and a playgroup we went to every week.

During those 4.5 months, my goal was to keep my son safe, and healthy, maintain the house, and work on all the paperwork and everything we had to do to get to Germany. There wasn’t a lot of time or energy to better myself as a person. My son watched way too much Elmo during those days, and I always felt like I was on the verge of tears.

When You Are Used to Living in Survival Mode

Over the next few years, my husband would deploy four times, and I would enter periods of survival mode. Trying to get through each day, trying to make the best of the time apart, feeling like I wasn’t able to do everything I wanted to do.

As we military spouses head into periods of deployment with survival mode hitting us in the face, we can feel like things will never change. That we will always be surviving and that we won’t do any thriving. That we just have to count down the days, getting through them, until they come home.

So how you can get out of survival mode? What can you, as a milspouse change to make the time apart from a better experience for yourself and your family?

Step outside your comfort zone

If you feel yourself sliding into survival mode, take a look and see what you can change about your day-to-day life. How can you step out of your comfort zone to try something new? Is it taking the kids to a new playgroup? Taking your kids to Grandma’s house by yourself? Joining a club that you heard about?

Trying something new can make you feel stronger, and that can carry over to the rest of your deployment.

Remember, you got this

Seriously, you do. Even if you think you are not making it through this deployment, as long as you wake up each morning, take care of your kids, and make it to the end of the day, you got this.

Remember, the deployment is just days. There might be a lot of days, but they are only just days. After you hit enough of them, you will be done, and the deployment will be over.

Make a lot of plans

Make plans. Stay busy. Start a new hobby. Get out with friends. Redo something in your house. Write a book. Volunteer. There are so many different things you can do to stay busy during a deployment.

As I look back on the times I was more likely to be in survival mode; it was when I wasn’t as busy and didn’t make as many plans.

It’s okay to cry

You are going to have bad, tear-filled days during deployments. It’s okay to cry. Try not to let the tears consume you. Let yourself do it but make sure to get out of bed. Think about the good things going on in your life, even if they are silly.

Start writing down all the good things that will happen during the deployment. Your son turning one, the latest book release from your favorite author, or a visit from your mom. All these little excitements will help you see that life still happens even when your spouse is deployed.

Ask for help

If you need to ask for help, do so. Military spouses have a hard time asking for help. I am so guilty of this. I will try to do everything myself before I would ever ask for help. But sometimes you need to.

If you feel like you need to see a counselor, do that too. Going to see a professional on a regular basis can help you through the deployment, help you see that you can do this, and help you thrive while your spouse is away.

Know that survival mode is okay, grow through it

Sometimes, you will just be in survival mode, and that is okay. Just remember, this won’t last forever. While I believe you can rock your deployment, not every day will look that way.

You know yourself and what you can handle. You know when things are getting too complicated and when you need to reach out. If that means being in survival mode for a while, that’s okay too.

What is the best way you have found to get out of survival mode and start to thrive during a deployment?

Military Spouse Employment Matters to the Military Spouse Community

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Military Spouse Employment Matters to the Military Spouse Community

Yes, Military Spouse Employment is Important

The beauty of 2023 is that remote work is a lot easier to come by than it used to be. Many companies that had never considered having remote workers in the past were forced to do so in 2020 and have chosen to stick with remote work for the long term, at least on some level. Remote work is a huge plus for military spouse employment.

I work from home and while I had been doing this before 2020 hit, I am glad to see so many others being able to figure out how to do so. Remote work can be great for military spouses, and the flexibility is one reason why. You can be your own boss and go to the entrepreneur route, or work for a company from home.

From those early days as a WAHM, I learned that working from home was definitely all about balance. I needed to figure out how to get all my work done and take care of the baby and the house. A lot of lessons were learned along the way.

And THEN my husband joined the military. Was this going to be an adventure? I wasn’t so sure but I was ready for the life change. We found out he was going to be stationed in Germany.

Europe…of all places!

I was SO excited about this new path we were taking, even though I was pretty scared about all the details and what it would take to get there. In the end, it took us about 4.5 months to join him over there. And I had to give up my eBay business.

Now, at the time, I was glad for the break. I didn’t have to worry about filling orders anymore. I could focus on our move and our son. But in the back of my head, I couldn’t help but think about what I was giving up.

This little business, that I had worked so hard on, had to be put up. At least for the time we were overseas. Why? Because of SOFA and what they allowed and didn’t allow family members to do while living in another country. We couldn’t use the APO mailbox for anything business-related.

When a service member is trying to decide to reenlist in the military, a big factor is the health and well-being of their family members. One big part of this is military spouses and their own career paths. We all know that military life means sacrifice.

We know that military life means having to move often, running the household alone at times, and giving up some of what we want to do, even temporarily. But we also know that being able to chase our own dreams is important which is why military spouse employment matters.

According to the Military Spouse Chamber of Commerce, the military spouse unemployment rate was 22% in 2021. That means that out of the 1 million military spouses, 1 in 4 are unemployed. To compare, the national unemployment rate in 2021 was 4.83%.

As you can see, military spouse employment is an important issue. One that many military spouses have been concerned about for a while. Whether you are a military spouse entrepreneur, having to make changes you don’t want to make to go with your service member to their next duty station, or a military spouse trying to find yet another job, hoping and praying you find something that pays more than $11/hr, military spouse employment issues are important to you.

Volunteering

Volunteering is so very important, it really is. And military spouses do volunteer well. But a question we need to ask ourselves is, is the military depending on volunteering vs offering paid positions? Do people think that military spouses are okay with working for free, filling spots that could otherwise be paid because volunteering is the norm?

If you ask any senior spouse, they will probably tell you of a time when they felt like they are expected to lead some type of group or event simply because of who they are married to. We always say the military is the service member’s career, not the military spouse’s. But then, the culture of military life is that some spouses are expected to step up into these leadership roles.

What if the spouse works full-time? What if they have other obligations? What if they just don’t want to fill that role?

Location-Based Issues

Sometimes a military spouse moves to a new place, and they either can’t find a job or their job literally doesn’t exist there. This can be very frustrating and again, the military spouse has to make some hard decisions.

Should they put that part of their life on hold? Should they stay behind? Should they pivot and try to turn this frustration into something else?

What can be done about this? Sometimes it can feel like the only jobs available are retail and that isn’t the solution for every military spouse.

Employers Won’t Hire Military Spouses

A question that seems to come up in some military spouse groups I am in is if you should mention anything about being a military spouse on your resume or in an interview and the answer is always a big NO. Don’t do it. They don’t need to know this information and in many cases, they won’t hire you because of the fact that you are a military spouse.

But the scary reality is, as soon as a possible employer hears that you might not be sticking around longer than 2-3 years, they might just write you off. They don’t even want to take the chance. But this makes finding the right job when you PCS more difficult, even if you are qualified for that position.

What is the solution to the military spouse employment issue?

What if things could change for the better? What if we could get that military spouse employment rate down? What if military spouses could thrive in their careers during military life instead of feeling as if they can’t possibly move forward while their spouse is actively serving?

There are certain things the government can do. There are things the military can do. There are things we can do to get this figured out. To get military spouse employment to a better place.

We can share our stories, and find out what worked for other military spouses.

We can pay attention to upcoming legislation and changes that have to do with military spouse employment, such as the Military Spouse Hiring Act.

We can start asking more and more questions about what the military community can change and what we can do in the future to make things better.

What about you? What has been your experience with Military Spouse Employment? Have you been able to further your career during military life? What has worked and what hasn’t worked for you?

The Military is Going to Disappoint You

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The Military is Going to Disappoint You

Making plans as a military spouse feels like gambling. Will we be able to go on that trip? Will we really move to that state next year? What will the next few years look like?

I learned pretty quickly that the military is going to disappoint you. Paperwork takes longer than it should, dates get changed, and you can be left feeling like your thoughts and desires don’t even matter.

Getting used to this isn’t easy and even 16 years in, I still feel that disappointment. I feel it when drill dates get changed last minute. I feel it when we have to cancel trips due to being called up. I feel it when I start to wonder if my husband will be deployed and if so for how long?

There are just so many unknown changes in military life.

I think we try to cling to things that seem so certain, even if they could actually change, even if we know they might do so. We want so badly to have a normal life, plan all the things, and have them actually happen. We want to feel like we have some type of control.

When we hear our spouse might be getting orders to a new duty station in California, we want to plan all the things. We want to figure out where to live and what schools our kids will go to. We want to start a bucket list and plan what we will do for fun. We want to start to apply for jobs and get that moving.

But then, the military changes its mind and we end up in another state or another country and have to start the process all over again. We get frustrated because even if we can come to terms with the moves, coming to terms with the changes associated with them can be more difficult.

The truth is, the military is going to disappoint you and often. And the best thing to do is figure out how to roll with these changes. Because they are going to keep coming.

The military is going to disappoint you because living a military life is a bit of a sacrifice. Your service member signed up to give these years to the government. And doing so means that the mission comes first. Even if it is frustrating or inconvenient for the family.

We joke about always writing our plans in pencil but maybe that is what we have to do to stay sane. We joke about Murphy but maybe we have to plan for that to happen, and a plan for what we should do if it does. We joke about “hurry up and wait” but maybe that is what we always have to have in our heads when it comes to anything military.

As military spouses, we have to work hard to establish ourselves even within the military world. Depending on where you are stationed and what your own dreams might be, this isn’t always easy. We might need to pivot and plan for a last-minute deployment, or other change we didn’t see coming.

As military spouses, we have to figure out ways to handle the disappointment that comes with all of this. Some of us might need to cry it out, that’s okay. There is nothing wrong with feeling sad over a disappointment. But then, we have to figure out how to move through the change, and what we can do to get back on track.

Having some good military spouse friends, either in person, online, or both can be a good way to handle some of what military life brings. Your military spouse friends have been there. And can be there to encourage you. To see the light in the tunnel, and to help you come up with a plan.

Having good systems in place so you are not left all alone and so that you do have a backup plan is important. Who will you call if something breaks in your house? Who will you go to if your childcare falls through? What will you do when you are having a bad day and just need to find a listening ear?

Having a good plan for those what-ifs of military life can go a long way in helping you through periods of time when the military disappoints you. You can plan for everything, and when you do, those plans can change but you can be prepared for what you might need in the future.

You can also try to use caution when it comes to certain things. Don’t plan out a PCS before the orders come. Don’t assume your spouse will be around for something in the future, they might not be. And yes, always use that pencil in your planner. That way you can pivot, change, and get through the disappointments that come with military life.

To the Military Spouse Who is Far Away From Family

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To the Military Spouse Who is Far Away From Family

Today is my mom’s birthday. I so wish I could be with her today. I would have taken part of the day off to take her to breakfast or lunch, probably both. We all could have joined her for a family dinner that night. My boys and I could have made her a cake and opened presents together.

But instead, I will give my mom a call later today, hope that the package I sent for her birthday makes it in time, and think about how in the future maybe, just maybe we could be together for our birthdays.

Living far away from family can be challenging, and military families have to do this for most of their time in the service. Some are lucky and are able to live close enough to visit often, or their family will move to be with them.

But for everyone else, raising your children far away from your family is a part of the military life package. It’s something you have to get used to and make the best of. Because there isn’t much you can do about it.

To the military spouse far away from family, I know being away can be hard.

To have to miss the little things going on back home.

Sunday dinners with the family

Date nights while your children are safe with grandma and grandpa

Grandparent’s Day at school

Taking your brother or sister out for their birthday

Mother’s Day at Grandma’s house

Being there when a family member is hurting

The list could go on and on…

What we miss can hit us hard, even when we least expect it. When we can’t go home for Christmas, we can tell ourselves that we are fine with that, but when the day comes, the sadness can hit us hard. Just a reminder that you are living your life in a different way than you thought that you would.

As a military family, you become the ones that are always visiting but never really there. Your children are the visitors, the ones that don’t know what it is like to live near family and all the blessings that can bring.

This can be so difficult because as parents we always want the best for our children. We want them to feel all the love that they can. And we know that by living across the country from the people we love the most hurts, and in ways, our children might not even realize.

How do you make the best of being away from family?

Take trips home

When you can take a trip home, do so. Visiting will help with the distance, even if you can only do so every few years. Encourage your family to come out and visit you too.

If you are stationed in Europe, encourage your family to visit for a few weeks. This could be their only chance to visit Europe, and they can do so without having to spend a dime on a hotel. Check for airline discounts and make plans when your spouse has leave coming up.

Facetime

Talk on Facetime. The kids love this, and it is so nice to see people on video vs just hearing their voice. Try to set up a regular day each week to Facetime so that everyone is ready for the call.

There are so many more ways to talk with people today, even from thousands of miles away. Take advantage of them.

Share stories and photos

Facebook is ideal for this. Share stories about your kids as well as photos. The more your share with your family members, the more they will get to know the personalities of your children.

They will learn more about your daily life and what you have been up to. Long email updates can work too. Keeping the people back home updated is how to stay bonded through the distance. Hopefully, they will be doing the same.

Think of what you have gained

Believe it or not, there are benefits to raising your family far from home. Your friendships can be deeper because you are spending more time with those you have chosen to call your friends. You spend the holidays together, get through deployments together, and can bond in ways you never would with your family.

Being far away means you won’t be involved in as much family drama. This can be important for some families. It’s easy to think that everything will be perfect if you could just live near them too but daily life, different emotions, opinions, as well as expectations, can leave to tensions within a family.

Remember, this isn’t forever

Although it might seem like you will always be so far from them, things will change. If you are overseas, you will eventually move back to the States. If you live on the East Coast, you might end up on the West Coast.

Your family could move, or you could get out of the military and settle near them too. Being away from family doesn’t always last forever so keep that in mind when you are missing them the most.

How far are you away from your family? Does that distance bother you?

The Rocky Road Ahead For a Military Spouse

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The Rocky Road Ahead

She is standing there, looking at the rocky road ahead, unsure what is next and what the future will look like. Such is the life of a military spouse.

He got his orders and is packing his bags, how are we doing this again? How is it time?

She promises she will be strong, she has done this before, she can do it again. She will conquer this rocky road ahead.

He has heard the rumors, but now he knows they are true.

She will be leaving soon, a few months earlier than they thought. How will he make it through this deployment? The one he thought he would be prepared for, but now feels like it never will be. That rocky road ahead.

As military spouses around the world know, there is good and there is bad when it comes to military life. There are the highs and there are the lows. There are easier times and times when it feels like the road is a little too rocky. When it feels like it is a little too much to endure.

We do what we can when we are faced with this rocky road. We depend on our friends and hope and pray they will understand all the emotions we might have in the next few months.

We work to stay busy but sometimes even that isn’t enough. And sometimes the busy is what causes the stress, and we have to pull back. We have to work to find that balance that seems almost impossible to find.

We pull the tools we have used in the past out of our deployment tool kit and pray they will work again. And sometimes they do. And sometimes they don’t.

We want to believe we can get through anything, truly anything that rocky road brings, but somedays we are unsure we can.

We take the good and the bad and hope that overall we can smile more than shed tears. We hope that we can laugh more than feel defeated. We hope that we can depend on one another when times get a little too hard.

Whether you are a brand new military spouse or a more seasoned one, we all feel that pit in our stomachs, when the orders come, when the date fall, when the buses leave.

We miss them when they are gone, but also understand why they had to go. We make plans to enjoy the time apart but hope that time goes by quickly and doesn’t drag on too much.

As military spouses, we are presented with that rocky road ahead so many times. It might be looking an overseas PCS in the face, or it might be a deployment that came out of nowhere. It might be struggling with a loss in the family, or trying to find your way back after a difficult season.

As military spouses, we also know that we can find the strength to get to the other side. We know that we have done it before, as so many others have done too. We know that we might need to take it one day at a time, but that soon enough we will be at the end, ready for the next season of our lives.

What is your biggest military spouse struggle? What do you do when you are faced with it?